I first want to apologize up front if I offend anyone with this post. It really is just something that I have been thinking about for several years and in no way meant to hurt anyone's feelings.
This morning I weighed 201 pounds. As I was puttering around on my computer, I came across all of the spreadsheets that I make each time I start a new "diet". This only covers a span of about 3 years and my weight ranged anywhere between 214 (the most recent start date) at the high to 178 at the low. I noticed that I almost always started each new chart at right around 200 pounds. For me I guess 200 has always been the number, whether I have hit it or it is coming quickly, that I realize I need to do something.
This morning, I took a walk around my neighborhood. Two miles gave me plenty of time to think about whatever came up. I ended up wondering how people got so large. Much in the way I suppose skinny girls wonder how a girl my size got so big, I wonder how people bigger than me got to their size.
For a long time, I weighed about the same. I shouldn't have since I ate fast food everyday, snacked all day long and ate amazing amounts of chocolate or ice cream every night. I always knew one day it would catch up to me. Well a few months ago, after changing to a strictly sitting job, it did. I gained 15 pounds since September of last year. So here I am on the journey again.
I suppose my question is, at some point I can feel the excess skin under my chin push up when I'm sitting, get so horribly winded climbing the stairs in my house that I am basically forced into action. Don't most people have this same realization? Obviously, in my case, I haven't lost it for good. I never get to goal weight but I knock off 10-20 pounds for awhile anyway.
I know that some people have medical problems that cause them to gain or maintain large amounts of fat but I don't think that is really that common. I know too that some people have higher self esteem and maybe the extra weight doesn't bother them as much mentally as it does for me.
I don't know if this makes any sense to anyone but me and it probably sounds rude and I am sorry for that. I guess it just seems like it would be hard to get to 250-300+ pounds without that AHA moment. I have to say though, that those of you that start off that heavy how amazed I am at your accomplishments. I look at the 50-60 pounds that I need to lose and am overwhelmed by it. I do not know how I would manage if I had one or two hundred pounds to get rid of.