Is fretting about losing weight a part of the "fat" mentality?

I find myself fretting from time to time about that topic:

*Did I exercise hard/long enough a given particular day?
*Did I eat enough or did I overeat?

etc, etc, etc....

And then other times, the other side of my brain kicks in and says: stop worrying about it, you're doing the best you can for today!!

I think Socrates said it best: there's a thin line between sanity and insanity

UGH! lol.

~ tea

I think for me, it definitely was a mindset I had to change. It added too much stress to my life, and then when I got overwhelmed or frustrated, I'd quit. Taking the stress out of the entire process of getting healthier has made it possible for me to lose weight (very, very slowly) and maintain it, something I was never able to do before.

Though sometimes I "worry" that I don't worry anymore (how's that for crazy). Sometimes I think that maybe a little bit of worry would light a fire under my butt, so to speak, but I think I'm just "worried out." I guess that after dieting for more than 3 decades, I just don't have the energy to add that kind of stress to my life anymore. I like and appreciate my life, I do what I can when I can (or rather what I'm willing to do when I'm willing to do it). I could be losing faster if I worried more, but I also know that if I go back to that kind of lifestyle, I will eventually get overwhelmed and frustrated (and that's when I've always given up).

For me the advantages of not worrying outweight the advantages of worry. Not worrying makes weight loss fun on my best days, no big deal on most days, and tolerable on the worst days.

Fat and mental status is almost equally related.People binge over food when happy or sad.I think they are the only mentally balanced people who can eat balanced and restricted at all occasions.

I think some people become fat because they're emotionally unbalanced (I don't mean crazy, just not "centered"), but some people become emotionally unbalanced because they gained weight or because of what they're eating, and for some people it's a vicious chicken/egg cycle.

To a large degree, I was taught to think that there was something wrong with me (mentally or emotionally) that I was hungry and prone to binging all of the time (from the age of 5). But I don't think that I was binging because of emotional issues, I think that the problem was biochemical, because I (finally) learned in the last year or so, that carbohydrates trigger binges in me far faster than emotional triggers. I do find that emotional triggers do inspire cravings for comfort food (usually high carb), but I think alot of that is learned as well as biological, as most "comfort foods" in most cultures are very high carb - it makes me wonder if there's a nutriceutical motive - carbs can have a sedating almost narcotic effect.

It's a fascinating dillema to consider, but for me avoiding refined carbs allows me to avoid most of what I used to assume was simply my "craziness." Turns out I wasn't nearly as crazy as I was carb-addicted.

For years, I didn't think much at all about weight loss and food. I just ate whatever I wanted when I wanted it. Calories? Fats? Who cares? I didn't. And I expect a lot of folks here were like that, too. It got me all the way to 200 pounds.

Now I am paying attention. Is that "fat mentality"?

No. I think overeating on a daily basis and staying ignorant and in denial about the consequences is "fat mentality."

It probably seems like "obsessing" simply because it's different to think something other than "Oh, yum, let's eat that now!" But really, it's just thinking about food in a different way and staying mindful.

Jay

In the past I never gave much thought to my eating and exercise. I ate anything and everything. Didn't care what was in it. How many calories it had. What it was doing to my body. As far as exercise, I didn't do any intentionally. My unintentional exercise (my daily movement) was lacking sorely also.

Now I actually think and contemplate what I will put in my mouth. How can I make the most of every meal? I monitor and track my calories. I exercise intentionally most days of the week. Make sure there's some sort of physical activity going on all days of the week. It keeps me fit, trim and HEALTHY - both physically and mentally. I am a much, much more productive and HAPPIER person.

In the past I was very irresponsible about my weight and my health. For me, they are one and the same (now, that is). Now - I eat mindfully, responsibly, intelligently, thoughtfully, carefully and sensibly. And that can not occur without thinking it through. It can't be just left to chance and up in air.

So, to answer your question I don't think so in the slightest. IMO, it's what's absolutely, positively NECESSARY in order to maintain a healthy weight. Eating healtlhy does not happen by chance - it's GOT to be thought about.

In the past I didn't worry about food. I use to run the 200 and 400 meters from middle school up to my sophmore year in college and was constantly told what to eat before trails and etc.. but never was taught why to eat these certain foods, so I never really learned how to eat. So it was 10 years after university that I start to put on weight. Now that I've learned how to eat and etc.. I do sometimes say did I workout enough and etc.. but IMO it's good for me because I'm questioning myself about my eating habits and exercising. I don't go overboard with it but it does help keep me in check.

I agree with JayEll and rockinrobin.

By the very nature of deliberately deciding to lose weight, one becomes aware of food intake, exercise, calories, and so on. Generally speaking, to be successful at weight loss, one must consider these things. I don't consider it to be "fretting about losing weight", I consider it an essential awareness that I need to have in order to lose weight.

When I am down to a more healthy weight, I will be able to pay less attention to diet and exercise, simply because over time, habits will have been formed and automatised. But during the process of change, I need to be aware and thinking, and I don't think that constitutes a "fat mentality". Yes, it's an attitude likely to be found in fat people losing weight, but it's an artefact of losing weight, instead of something that forms an inherent part of a fat person's mindset. On the other hand, people who have always been a healthy weight may not have to consider these things as strongly as its likely that their natural habits and preferences are conducive to remaining a healthy weight - again, it doesn't support the "fat mentality" idea, but just that it may be a thing that is less relevant to people of a healthy weight. Naturally, there are slim people who may monitor their diets and exercise just as strictly as anyone on these forums, but I think my point still stands.

Having said that, and I think this is what you are alluding to in your original post, there is a point where the fretting can become unnecessary and harmful, and not helpful to the goal of losing weight. That's where the fine line comes in, I think!

I think there is a huge distinction between Awareness/Care and Fretting/Worrying. Knowledge is power, and to put knowledge into practice you need awareness and a commitment to using that knowledge. Fret or worry is neither of those things, worry is feeling bad about the choices you've made, fearing that they're either wrong or insufficient (sometimes with no basis in fact).

Plan and make your choices, stand by them, and leave worrying out of the equation as much as you can.

Me too ~ precisely.

Like Jay & Robin, I never used to worry about what I ate consistently. I would have little spurts here and there of caring and watching, but they never lasted. Same with exercise - I joined a gym because I hated my now ex-husband and it was an excuse to get out of the house, didn't last. I am aware now of what I eat and my exercise, and I think about it regularly. I believe I will have to for the rest of my life. That being said, I also sometimes 'fret' about it to the point that I'll lock down and do nothing. This usually results in overeating or no exercise. Solid planning is the best thing I have found to keep that from happening.

I have people, DH especially, look at me and say 'you are so skinny, why are you weighing you peanut butter, that's crazy' or 'why are you exercising so much, you know 30 minutes three times per week is plenty'. I have started responding with 'if I want to stay skinny I have to measure my peanut butter and exercise more often'. Sometimes is works, sometimes it doesn't. Just this weekend we talked about weighing every day - I had asked him to point out to me when I seemed to be slipping into crazy control freak mode, and he thought weighing every day was a step to that. I explained that weighing every day was actually keeping me away from that at this point, as I would obsess about my weight every non-scale day otherwise.

I see the planning and the vigilance as a 'don't want to be fat' mentality rather than a 'fat' mentality!

Hit the nail on the head with that response, I don't think I can add to it.

As Ever
Me

Yes. Exactly.

In fact, I see it as a "healthy mentality" or "a healthy state of mind"

I remember back in my morbidly obese days that I had this one friend, more like an acquaintance actually, that was so health conscious. She was always taking long walks, playing tennis and going to the gym. Always ate so carefully and was always looking for ways to make her recipes healthier. I SO much wanted to be like her. I wanted to be "one of those people" who actually gave a darn about their weight/health/weight. She was one of the people that I felt even more uncomfortable about being around. It was because by her leading such a healthy lifestyle, it made ME feel worse about my poor lifestlye.

Not sure why I threw that in here at this time, but it somehow came to mind.

Maybe because I am thrilled that now *I* am one "of those people".

Unlike others, I don't think a day has gone by since I was 10 years old (I'm now 43) that I didn't worry, fret, think, cry, rationalize, calculate, or day dream about my weight. When I hear people say, "I spent all my time taking care of others instead of myself" I always feel guilty, because I wish I had that reasonable excuse for becoming morbidly obese, but I can't use that excuse because in the last 30+ years I have spent more time worrying about my weight than I have ever spent worrying about another thing. So yes...for ME, I think it is my fat mentality that keeps me worrying about my weight loss. If I would have spent this much time and energy at school, I'd be a rocket scientist.