I haven't hit goal yet, but based on what's happened so far, it'll take awhile for me to adjust my mental image to my physical one. There's this height/weight chart online where people can post pictures of themselves, so you can get an idea of what different weights might look like on different heights. So, I found my height on the chart, and saw a woman who was the shape and size as me, but weighed 30 lbs more. I thought that was pretty weird. Later, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and was surprised to see I was picturing myself as larger than I really was.

I never know how big or small I really am. All through high school at probably 125 pounds, i had no self confidence I thought I was enormous. In college, I had great self confidence and I thought i looked good and curvy and I think I actually did. After college, I had a dark year or two and I don't think I ever looked in the mirror because I knew I'd hate how I looked. And now, 20 pounds between my heaviest and my goal, I think I definitely look better than I did (and I fit into those good looking dresses again!) but I know I could improve. But this time around, I'm pretty happy with myself, no matter what the scale says, and I know I'm a strong woman and I can be thinner if I want to but I still look great.

Yes, every day. It's especially hard because all of my cousins are super thin (90 - 105 pounds) and I'm the "fat" one. And then with the acting business, everyone around me is sooo thin, that I always feel like a fat blob. I'm hoping that when I hit goal, it'll get better.

I feel fatter a lot of the time. I think the thinnest I've felt was when I went to Torrid to buy some new shirts since mine are too big. I looked fantastic trying on the clothes there. Even the clothes I were wearing looked better and my body looked a lot smaller. But once I got home, I thought the clothes looked so bad.

My good friend's 17 year old daughter who is 6 feet tall and weigh's 115 pound and looks like a bean pole was complaining the other day how fat she is getting!

We all just looked at her like she was NUTS!

I think the feeling can happen to anyone and everyone in different degrees not just over weight people!

I feel fat when I am in my gym working out because there are so many young thin people in there working out everytime when I go.

BUT whenever I stop at White's Truck stop in Raphine, VA when I travel I feel super skinny in there! I kid you not! Half the truckers in there look to be 400lbs PLUS! LOL!

I stop in there now for lunch whenever I pass by! GREAT salad bar and food believe it or not!

Yes, absolutely, there are days that I feel fat. How we see ourselves in the mirror is so subjective.

When I see my former self, I think, WOW was I heavy!! But I didn't think so then. Now I'm just used to my thinner self, but there are the bloated days, the "day after the big eating binge day", where I feel fat. I know I'm not really "fat", but certainly bigger than I am used to seeing now.

That's why I can't trust my subjective view to determine if I'm OK with my weight or not. I also need the scale, and the tape measure, and the body fat analysis. My eye can lie to me, and has SO many times before.

I can't see myself clearly. I'm sure this is a symptom of some kind of disorder. The minute I confront myself in a mirror, there's a mild shock: So that's me? Doesn't matter if I am fat or a healthy weight. Then I seem to start photoshopping mentally, either making myself grotesque, average or beautiful, depending on my mood.

My mental image of myself lags considerably behind the reality. When I was 247 pounds, I didn't think I was that heavy. Photographs upset me. Was that really me?

Now, much lighter, I have a problem when I go shopping. I hold up clothing & try to guess whether the large, medium or small sweater will fit me. Nearly always, I overestimate.

I also had the experience of riding an escalator in a large crowd & encountering an enormous mirror that reflected everyone in the crowd. We were all wearing winter coats, and in the NY area, that means black & navy -- thus, not much differentiation by clothing. I had trouble finding myself in the crowd at first. (I actually had to wave at myself.) This was spooky & disorienting. Like going to a bus station to meet someone but not knowing what the person looked like.

I look at mirrors & reflective surfaces a lot lately. Any passerby would think that I am a real narcissist. I'm not. I'm just trying to relearn my face & body so that I can recognize myself & carry around a fairly accurate mental image.

I think that when we're heaviest, we are so set on ignoring that fact that we often do believe we're thinner than we are. I used to think to myself all the time "The scale may say ___ but I'm not as big as other girls that weight that much. I carry my weight really well. I'm curvy. No one thinks I'm fat."
And now, every time I lose a pound or two I feel like an enormous difference has been made, I start trying on smaller clothes and I can see the small changes in my stomach.
And then something will happen to remind me that I'm large. I was at my friends house the other day sitting on a chair next to a FULL LENGTH MIRROR and every time I glanced that way I just got more and more depressed. Then my friend's boyfriend had this guy over and all I was thinking to myself was "Oh god I wish I could hide I know he's probably thinking 'what a lard $$$' no one could be attracted to me like this."
Later in the week I found out that he not only wasn't thinking that, he's got a crush on me.
Then this morning I was feeling like a fat slob when I woke up cause i ate too much yesterday and gained a pound, but I went downstairs and the first thing my grandmother said to me was "you look too thin. turn sideways. lift up your shirt so i can see your stomach." i didn't lift up my shirt, but her fussing made me feel thinner.
So really its all perception, and we are each our own worst enemy and best friend.

Thanks, Lori. {} That's very affirming. You make me feel a little less weird & a little more normal.

That's what 3FC is about, though, isn't it? ;-)