should i be happy or sad?
 

so this isnt step 1 for me in weightloss. i started out at a delightful 205 and now im at a 141. i am very proud of myself but at the same time very frustrated. i still have more weight to lose but i cant seem to kick this platue. ive been stuck at this weight for months. i cant seem to get it to budge, ive tried many things to jump-start it, but to no avail.


it very frustraiting because ive come so so far, but it feels like im being teased with this last little bit. aside from that i have a huge problem with extra sagging skin. i guess thats what i get for losing a 5th grader :). again though, it seems so unfair to me, a girlfriend of mine has lost about 40lbs and her tummy is tight and flat. AND she doesn't work out. its very frustrating, it seems so effortless for others, and they have wonderfull results, i cant seem to get mast my limitations.

please dont get me wrong, im excited about what ive done and how far ive come, but at the same time its so discouraging. to be frank, its not like its a little soft skin, no, its a lot of sag, and a weird shape, and stretched and squishy and damaged. (much more than it should be or so ive been told)
<P> im scared that ive tried so hard but to no avail. even with clothes to cover it, im so excited to say that i can get my butt into a size 7 (down from the 16-18 i was). there is still that front blob top, not fat, but skin. im very aware of it.
<p> as an example, in september, in florida, i finally got gutsy enough to wear a bikini (WOO) so i did. i went to a very unknown beach (no crowds) and made myself do it. all i wanted was to feel the sunshine on my tummy. (i guess i get that from my cat :) i was very proud of myself and i decided to go for a walk along the little side pools at the water. but as i walk along i pass people sitting and walking. i got giggles, looks and a girl even covered her mouth. mostly from people around my age. that hurt so so much. it was a huge blow.


im not sure where to take myself and my self esteem from there. i mean they have no idea where ive come from or how hard ive worked. and i can tell myself that untill my face turns blue but i do realize that im not there yet. but at the same time, discouragement like that makes it so much harder.


i know there are more than one heavy topics here (excuse the pun) but i just need to know that everything is going to work out in the end. ive been trying and working hard for so long. does anyone have tips for the skin?, ive tried creams and serums and whatnot, im not sure what to do. :?:

there are reasons i took this from the back

errr hey.. are you SURE people were giggling at you? that seems quite bizarre to me and to me you look great in your bikini! what is your issue w/ that? is it your legs because they look fine to me.

so, you and i are similar weights and came from similar highs. the skin-type stuff is genetic though if you weight train, you might be able to tone it up a little more. ive been around 140 for awhile (years) and still would like to take a few off but mostly im cool with my body. im 27 by the way. also other women who havent lost a tremendous amount of weight have issues w/ cellulite and sag, not just us. i have it.. my arms i dislike the most, my tummy is flat but NOT "tight," and i have cellulite on the back of my legs. whatevs, i say.

i do moisturize every day, i do yoga and a little bit of weight training for strength, and cardio. my body has improved since ive been maintaining, but unforch im not blessed with super tight skin to begin with.

I can't say I've been much help here, just know that others are in your boat, and the answer is YOU SHOULD BE HAPPY! THRILLED! You look great!

Well...from what i can tell from the picture..you look great!! And i definately think it is AWESOME that you got out there in a bikini. I did a two peice this past summer (first time in many many years) but even then...my top had a material that hung down over the belly area. I just am not happy with my tummy. It bulges out from right under my boobs too my private. Well...actually it's droopy there...got that apron effect going on. I don't think my skin will ever tighten up on it's own...gonna probably have to have a tummy tuck one day...but will worry about that after i've maintained my loss for over a year. Anywho...back to you....i think you have done an awesome job and should defiantely give it some time to see what your skin is going to do and be proud of all the results you've gotten from yourself so far.

thanks very much.

as for the girls laughing, i know it was me becushe she kinda laughed covered her mouth, elbowed her friend and pointed. aaand i ws the only one over there. and there wasnt a shipwreck behind me.

as far as excersise. i love it. i weight train and i see a rainer 3 times a week. ill put it this way, when i first started with him i could barely deadlift 85lbs. NOW i can deadlift 215lbs after 15 reps. big strong girl :)

i guess my issue with my tummy is that it is a very strange shape. i have weird ... well...rolls on the front (i coudnt think of a better word).

ive been told that i'll need a tummy tuck. but with that though i think it would make me feel like im cheating. i dunno. im not a fan of weightloss speedbumps. and it feels like this is a big one.

but i sappose, if thats the worste thing to happen to me then i should consider myself blessed.

I think you just have to give it time. It may tighten up on its own after awhile.

You look awesome.

Honestly.... People are so stupid. I would have looked them in the eye and told them to eff off. That's just me though, too outspoken. lol I personally think you look fab (from behind anyways, I really can't see through people so I don't have a clue about the other side) I know it's easier to say than do, but try not to worry about the little insignificant *******s that you don't even know. You know how well you have done, I'm sure the people closest to you know.... You're freaking gorgeous ;)

:val1: thanks, its good to hear that everything is gonig to be ok.

time is a tough one for me. i know not to expect overnight results. and i thought a couple of months was good? but this whole 'being smaller' is newer to me, im still not entirely sure what to expect...and when.

:)

Cheating? How so? Your loose skin is the result of your hard work - it cannot be fixed by loosing more weight or working harder than you already do. It's not a weight loss speed bump, rather a side effect of weight loss. There is no amount of crunches or cardio that will lessen the loose skin, no exercise to repair it. With time the look may improve - we all have time - spend it positively.

You've done a marvelous job! Marvelous! And you're so rocking that bikini.

You look beautiful and should be very proud of yourself! I think it is wonderful that you had the courage to wear a bikini. Don't worry about what other people think. You have worked hard and look great. Some people are just ignorant and rude.

thats good advice. WOW we've come a long way. it feels fantastic doesnt it? :)

I would agree that weight training will help tone things up for you slightly, and when you are fully dressed, invest in some spanx. They are awesome.

I went to Mexico recently and got into my bikini a few times. Even though I am in a good weight for my height and am not really overweight, I still felt it when I was out on the beach. My thighs have cellulite, my tummy jiggles, I am not perfect like some of the other girls who were on the beach. It does hurt because it makes you question all the hard work you have done and makes you feel like no matter what you do, it's never enough. As bleak as that sounds, it's true. I might never be tanned, skinny and perfect. I might not have every guy on the beach staring at me. That's ok. Because I am smart, sensitive and a million other wonderful things that those girls can never have. So I refused to let it get me down.

Wearing a bikini in public for the first time in years (or the first time ever) is HUGE! It takes guts and you should be proud of yourself for doing it. Just be nice to yourself, it's not going to come together all at once, it takes time to put yourself out there like that and feel confident. Don't worry you'll get there. Just love yourself in the meantime!

I agree with FB--a tummy tuck has nothing to do with cheating! I'm getting one in a few months myself. Some people can get rid of excess skin other ways but lots of people have issues with sagging skin that never goes away on its own after they've lost a lot of weight. Check out the "body image and issues after weight loss" forum and the sticky post about loose skin that is in that section for more info. :)

Have you ever had your body fat percentage measured? That'd be interesting. Then you'd know whether further weight loss would help or not.

Have you done any reading in the maintainers forums? or the resistance and weight training ones?

You are young and beautiful and you are doing so many right things, I can certainly understand why you're frustrated.

Don't listen to what other people are saying. Make your own mantra. You are capable of getting over this hump, it may just take a while.

Those girls should be slapped! Don't let it get to you though, you look fabulous! I can only dream of having legs like yours. I started getting cellulite on my thighs when I was 12 and no amount of weight loss will ever fix it. I know when I'm done losing I will have saggy legs and tummy, but I feel so much better than I did. I don't think you should feel that a tummy tuck is cheating. I'm too chicken to have surgery so I think you are brave if you decide to do it. We can't help the genes we were born with. Try to focus on all the good parts of your body like those beautiful legs!

You look great! Don't listen to anyone who would tell you different or act like an idiot. They are just that, idiots.

As far as your plateau, what are you currently doing for your plan? How many calories a day, how much water, etc.

I am sorry that I dont have any advice but I just want to say you look absolutely fantastic. You have come so far and I for one, am utterly inspired by you! Thank you:bravo::bubbles::whoo::woohoo::congrat::yay:

You've done a fantastic job! :bravo: And those deadlifts are awesome!!!! The result? Those great hamstrings that you were displaying in the picture.

For me, the last 10 pounds was all about 110% effort. Clean eating ALL the time, never miss a workout, never just go through the motions. Maintaining at that weight takes the same effort. You look great now, but I know how frustrating it is to work so hard and not be quite where you want to be, and not look like what you thought you'd look like.

Skin is very individual stuff. Have you read our FAQ sticky on skin in the Maintainers Forum? There is a lot of discussion about all the issues you've raised.

Many of us here have had tummy tucks after reaching goal and maintaining for a while. You look quite young which is a big plus. Have you had children? Pregnancy as well as fat takes a toll on skin and makes it harder for some of us to "spring back". Having surgery to remove excess skin is in no way a weightloss cheat. If it's within your budgetary realm, I'd look at it as a reward. For me, I'm not sure I would have been as likely to maintain if I hadn't had some of the skin removed. At my age and after 2 large pregnancies, it wasn't going away on it's own. Now I work extra hard to maintain the body that was under the floppy skin. My arms and legs recovered well (and they are loaded with muscle!), but I carried most of my weight on my stomach.

It's a very personal decision. Only you know what you can live with both in terms of diet and exercise, and cosmetic surgery.

:hug:

Mel

My lower abdomen is a mess. A MESS. It won't matter how much I lose or what I do. I will have to have surgery to be happy w/it.

Don't worry with the dumby diddlies on the beach. I just wish you were going to be front and center when THEY had weight problems because at some point, they most likely will.

you took the words right out of my head and put them down. i really have to say that i realy appriciate all the things said. they really make me feel better and give me hope hope hope hope. its been while since i posted on this site but i re-discovered it pretty recently and i dont know why i paused in the first place.

im not there yet, but im further than i ever EVER thought i would get when i started. its rough climb, but i am starting to feel inspired again that when i reach the top of this mountain i will have accomplished something that i had only dreamed i would do. ( and i'll have great calves ;))

im gonna get all mooshy here and say that i got all cry-ee reading all these things.
:o

You look GREAT in that bikini! i think your body just doesnt want to lose anymore weight..Maybe you should start pilates and yoga to tone?

Hey !

What's wrong with you ...you look sooooooooo pretty and in shape, it was only one incidence when somebody laughed (considering if she ever did on you) You've somehow forgotten how many people have appreciated who saw you fight the battle of bulge and then win over it. What you've done is amazing, you've gifted yourself with a more fit and healthy body.

Theirs much more than Bikini to be worn my dear ..if that's the only thing that worries you. During your routine life you don't have to wear the Bikini..and then theirs something you have to accept and move on, I do agree with all the ladies over here, give yourself few more months of eating healthy and try some toning exercises and you must see some kind of toning and if that's not much then remember we are lucky to be born in an age where technology is available to get rid of it.

As far as plateau goes...grrrrr I hate them too :p I've been stuck on it for no good reason since last 2 + months & with over 30 more pounds to lose I see you are still lucky that you just have the last 21 pounds to reach your goal weight. My suggestion forget what people say, 90 % of them would always appreciate you for what you've achieved so far..remember weight loss is not easy its one of the toughest thing to do and you're one of those brave souls who have done it in their life time :)

Celebrate your life !

First of all, you look great! People come in all shapes, sizes, and fitness levels. No one should laugh at anyone! You never know how far they may have come. That is so rude. The human body is beautiful and everyone has, at least, some perceived "flaws."

Second of all, I would give the skin a year to tighten up after you reach your maintenance weight. If it still bothers you after that, then go for the surgery (if that's your thing.) Getting rid of excess skin is not cheating at all in my opinion.

I had weird breast issues after I got to goal, but my skin tightened up after several months. I still have a bit of crepe-y skin on my tummy, but it doesn't bother me. So, you never know.

I say be happy and keep on going! Life's too short to let a couple of immature girls affect your happiness!

i do lots of weight training. i love it. just love it. it makes me feel very strong. i started weightlifting with my coach and could only deadlift 85 lbs. not i can deadlift 215 after 15 reps. WOO.

as far as being lucky, it bothers me when people say " im so lucky ive lost all this weight" im not lucky, i worked very hard to get here. luck has NOTHING to do with it.
:)