[Ufi]

Have you had to make major life changes to deal with stress eating?

I've really been trying to stop my stress eating, and I'm sometimes successful, but I've been surprised by how much food covered up with else I was dealing with. When I'm not turning to food, sometimes I feel miserable. Stomach upset, headaches, muscle aches, etc. I've worked on stress management techniques such as journaling, deep breaths, etc. I'm starting to wonder if I'm going to have to make major life changes to get away from the sources of stress. That makes me feel incompetent.

[JulieJ08]

I think making major life changes to get away from a source of stress that isn't helping you - is a sign of competence, not incompetence.

[Gogirl008]

Originally Posted by JulieJ08

I think making major life changes to get away from a source of stress that isn't helping you - is a sign of competence, not incompetence.

I totally agree with that. If it's possible for you to make changes to move away from what ever is causing you this stress, then why wouldn't you make these changes? If it isn't helping you to move forward in life, and it is actually hindering your progress and making you sick, then why keep moving in that direction? Good for you for recognizing this.
I realized that I didn't answer your question. No, I don't think I've had to make major life changes because of stress eating, but, it's probably something I should think about!

[ViolinJenn]

Like most folks I stress eat too, but I've found a way to deal with it that actually benefits me. My idea is this, if I can avoid stress eating do it, but if I gotta stress eat it's gonna be veggies and fruit! I've been stress eating and binge eating alot lately and gained 3.5lbs So last night, I got rid of EVERYTHING that is evil, no candy, no kashi cookies..NOTHING of that nature that I would turn too for binging and dealing with stress. I'm hitting the gym tomorrow(I have school tonight) and again on Saturday morning, Sunday is supposed to be nice so I think a nice brisk walk will be good, then back to the gym on Monday. That should blast off a nice chunk of calories as well as laying off the carbs for bit.

Just my $.02 hopefully it will work.

[thinkerbell]

Dear violinjenn,

I think that figuring out the stress-eating issue is the key to forever-ever weight loss.....as maintaining the loss is also so important.

So whatever is happening in your life right now is a very important lesson....it will help you gain skills for forever-ever weight loss!

This is a very important time.....and there are no failures, you are simply learning what works for you and what doesn't.

BTW, I can be a freakish and annoying pollyanna.....please take what you like and leave the rest!


For me, I have learned that alot of my own stress eating comes from doubting myself, not honoring what I know deep with....the split within, causes me to reach for food to numb out, quiet that inner voice.....shhhh, I don't want to hear it!

The reality is food does not solve the problem, it simply blocks the fear....which does feel good in the short term, but not very helpful in the long-term.

Someone I know who is a WW leader said this to me once, 'I was so upset, I went out and pulled weeds."

Someone else said, " I am so sad that I need to go to the gym.

So I am working on the affirmation.....

I am so upset, I need to_________________!


Keep holding on!
Thinkerbell

[JulieJ08]

Originally Posted by thinkerbell

Someone I know who is a WW leader said this to me once, 'I was so upset, I went out and pulled weeds."

Someone else said, " I am so sad that I need to go to the gym.

So I am working on the affirmation.....

I am so upset, I need to_________________!

I like that idea!!!

[ViolinJenn]

Hi Tinkerbell,

I understand what you are saying about redirecting my stress release from eating to something else. I was doing well with that up until Sept. My stress these days is due to adjusting to being a college student again (at least I have half of it figured out...knowing my stressors). I returned to college this fall, one class at time, full time job (which yeah me I was just offered a transfer to a dept that is directly in line with my studies!) and the "stuff of life" as a single girl. So I figure that it'll take me a semester or two to really adjust, so in the meantime, if I need to nosh on veggies in the interim, why not...it could be worse. I'd love some idea's though for quiet relaxing ways to relieve stress that I could do on a train or before class.

That is going to be my key.

[cakses]

I used to smoke when I was stressed. When I quit (April 2007) I immediately went to food. To break that, I tried exercising but I found I was having a lot of stress and not enough energy to exercise hours per day so I had to change things up. I started cutting up veggies like carrots, broccoli, green peppers and putting them in ziploc bags and when I would find myself opening the fridge the good stuff became the convenient choice. I also got rid of most of the junk in the house. Now that my DH is home from Iraq, I buy the kind of junk he likes and the kind I don't. So he still gets his fix and I am not tempted.

If I am super stressed out I truly do find the best medicine to be something outdoors. A walk, mowing the yard, pulling weeds, etc. Just getting outside and breathing fresh air and being a little constructive helps me work things out.

Good luck figuring out what works for you.

[Ufi]

I guess I feel like I should be able to handle the things causing stress in my life. I should be able to "take it," but by getting away from it, I would be giving up and am a loser. I'm a really high performer, but I'm finding myself resentful of the pressures on me through work and volunteer activities even to the point that I want to quit just so I can get away from the stress. But I like being capable, the one who fills in for the boss and has the answers. I like doing a good job.

I know what you mean about eating covering things up in the short term. If you eat often enough, it keeps it covered up a lot. I thought I dealt with a lot of stuff, with childhood issues and things. I thought things were much better and I was ready to tackle weight loss. It really ticks me off that I'm feeling miserable and overwhelmed sometimes. This is the life I've been living for a long time, and now I can't handle it WITHOUT FOOD?! That's such a shameful idea.

[Gogirl008]

So, it sounds like you are trying to decide here if you need more work on develpoing coping skills for your stress and eating issues, or if you should make huge changes with work.

You sound like someone I know. You like to feel like you should be able to handle it and your strong enough to take whatever comes your way. You probably can too. But at what expense? You have tried stress management, you have physical sypmtoms....are you happy? Do you measure your value or worth by the amount of chaos you can handle?

Do you like your job? Maybe you need to scale back on the volunteer activities to breath a little. It's okay to say no sometimes(even with out a reason!). Don't be so hard on yourself. Sounds like your trying to take on an awful lot.

[JayEll]

I agree with Gogirl008. I'm a "performer" too, and I like being the one who comes through and gets things done. I like those gold stars! The trouble is, there is no end to what people will ask you to do, and so you have to draw the boundaries. They won't.

I say Yes to additional work a lot, and it's for really good "reasons," but then I find myself committed to 10+ hour days 7 days a week to keep up. That's no way to live in the long term. (And for me, guess what? stress = weight gain. )

One idea would be to pick your least favorite volunteer activity and drop it. You don't need a reason. And (this may be the hard part) don't fill the freed-up time with a new volunteer activity. Use it to get your exercise in. Or the next time your boss wants to give you added work, tell him or her that you have all you can handle.

You are more than your job or your volunteer work.

Jay

[Ufi]

These are good questions. Let me think about it a bit and come back.

[Ufi]

You know, I don't know that anyone has ever asked me before if I'm happy. I'm happy sometimes, sad sometimes, etc. Overall, though, I wouldn't say I'm happy. I'm grateful I have a job when so many others don't. I'm glad to have a safe home and enough food on the table. I have friends I like. But happy? I don't think I feel that way.

[NightengaleShane]

Ufi, I believe happiness comes from within. One day, you will be able to reach inside yourself, find, and organize the necessary components that will make you truly happy. I also believe happiness is a day-to-day thing; you can be euphoric one day and disgruntled the next - sometimes with good reason, sometimes without. Perhaps you should spend some time thinking about things that make you happy, as opposed to what pleases or appeases others around you.

Have I had to make major life changes because of stress eating? I'm not sure; I've made a lot of general changes to my life in the last couple of years. All I know is that I have experienced the highest of highs and the lowest of lows; I am one who likes to make people happy; I go out of my way for others (even when sometimes I shouldn't, but I'm learning) and I am VERY prone to mood swings, binge eating, stress, and depression. I've thought long and hard about what makes me happy, accepted the "constants" in my life which I cannot change, and tried my best to find things that make me smile.

I hope this helps a little bit.

[Gogirl008]

I'm not saying that you should re-evalutate your whole life. But, when something isn't working in our lives I believe that is an opportunity to have a look.

Originally you were asking about stress eating and making changes. I think most of us agree that the stress eating is a coping mechanism and you should find a healthier way to deal with this stress (easier said than done, for me too ). But, you said you have tried stress mangement. So, I would say at this point, since you are still struggling, go deeper. ~What exactly is the stress and is it a necessity in your life? Do you get any type of full-fillment from this? I know life isn't always fun and there are those things that we just have to deal with. But, I also think it's really important to feel like you are living a quality life, what ever that means to you. Maybe instead of taking something away, there is something that you should add(?), something that is meaningful to you. What do you look back on when you are 70 years old? -I really do think like this, it's exhausting!!!

I know, way too deep this early in the day.