the reason i eat
 

when i was in the 9th grade , being shy i never fit into public school, add the fact my mother was really religious, there was a christian school close to me , long story short i began going to this christian school, this place was more close to a cult than anything, they took away my confindience my self woth, (to this day i still walk with my head down i really cant talk to people, )
when i was going there my parents owned a pizza restrant and they gave the school lunches , well everyday my mom would make me a sandwhich and have them delivier it with the school lunches, food became love to me , it was like someone pass those walls cared , someone loved me, i would always go outside by myself and eat this tanable love not thinking about were i was. needless to say it took a while to find this out, but i did, and no i'm still working on fixing my high school years. now im not blaming everthing on this school , i was always big, but never as big as when i stared thier. i found out love was not food, love was not something you could buy at mcdonalds. now i have givien up my one real sence of love(food) it does make the world more lonleyand i do get more depressed more offten, ohh im sorry to have wasted your time

Hey there. You haven't wasted anyones time. We all eat for different reasons and it is great to share with others why you eat. I eat to fill a void. An emptyness inside. As long as I am full I dont feel it. I eat to the point where I feel sick. I eat so much that it hurts. But anything feels better than benig lonely. I've been able to control myself and lose 10 pounds but sometimes I just binge. I just got done eating half a box of cereal and I feel sick to my stomach. I dont know why I ate it but before I realized what I was doing I was already full. I am so dissapointed in myself . I know that eating really doesnt do anything for me...it doesnt help fill the void and it just makes me feel worse. I don't know what the point is and sometimes I just feel hopeless.

Nc
You havent wasted anyones time..I think it is good you are sharing and writing about things you have discovered about yourself! Keep writing......................

Ralph Waldo Emerson said " A problem recognized is half solved"
Many have turned to food for love and comfort.....................you are not alone!

Just wanted you to know that!
WW Cin..