you're 219, and your goal for summer is 190. it's 29 pounds, and you have 3 months for a summer. I absolutely think you can do it. But as AJ said, stop self-talk that you won't meet that goal. At least, you are the one that should be the one believe in yourself if you want this journey to succeed. If you can't believe in yourself, then it'll most likely fail. So even if your scale doesn't say thing you want (i'm not friendly w/ my scale either), but no matter what happen, tell youself "I DEFINITELY can do it, and surely will succees". So keep trying.
I hope to hear from you and your journey more often
Words well spoken. I love the way you phrased everything. I'm glad you have faith that this is "Do-able", and you are probably right, I am setting myself up to fail rather than "I can beat it".
At one point i was on a "plateau" for 2 years......with the help of exercise, eating and a trainer. Broke the plateau when i went on holidays......go figure. Lost about 50 lbs. Now i'm stuck again. And i just had one of those "frigg it weeks - i don't care ". For some unknown reason i didn't gain weight.
I've bounced around and i'm coming up to my "dreaded number" on the scale ( if i get there again ). Sometimes i wonder if it's some psychological fear that causes certain hormones/chemicals in the body to be released and it totally disables any attempts to get past that number. Doesn't make sense but neither does not being able to get past that number on the scale.
I'm trying some much higher intensity exercise and some thing totally different from what my body is used to. I'm losing a tiny bit again. Have you given that different exercise approach a try? It's not easy....that's for sure. I really have no answer for you.......i've just rambled on here because i want you to know YOU ARE NOT ALONE in this. Don't hesitate to send me a message.... maybe we can brainstorm together if you like.
I"ve decided to keep trying........hope you will too.
Laura
Laura, thank you so much, so many people have posted that understand. Congrats on your 50 pound loss! Heck I can't even get past a 12 pound loss! I know I'm not giving it 100% I find every excuse in the book and I make up new ones. I don't know why that is. I will PM you for sure! Thanks a million for the suppor!
Kitty:
I need my "something" to click. How does that happen??? I wish I were strong willed - I'm so weak, as I told someone else, I can come up with all the excuses as to why this isn't working and why I can't...I just need that PUSH from inside. Least you are good 9 out of 10 times, it's almost in reverse for me!
Your post and all the others are helping to pull me back to where I should be! Thanks so much!!!
Just want to say a huge THANK YOU to all of you who have taken the time to post and who continue to post.
I have read every word - and I'm sorry if I haven't replied yet directly to you. I am glad to know that there ARE others who have been there and truly understand. This is the hardest fight of my life.
I can do it all and be it all for my kids -- but not for myself -- and my DH says I should also want to do this for US because the romance is really in crappy shape. I have no interest in - well you know --
I am so ashamed of my body. When we were dating I was the hot chick that everyone gave a double look too. When I'd visit him at work, heads would turn, now I avoid his office Christmas party and never ever visit his office.
If I detest looking the way I do, then why can't I fix this?
In my original post - I neglected to say that I had been thin my ENTIRE life until I had our children. Our oldest is 6. I was 133 when we were first married. And I thought I was fat at 133. ?????
Can you feel my pain and tell my heart is truly breaking?
Sorry to dump on everyone, but thank you for being there.
Last edited by 2Bthinagain; 06-30-2008 at 07:54 PM.
I can identify with many of the successful losers here. There was definitely something different when I commited myself to losing weight (again) this time than before. I really can't tell you what it was but I know something just 'clicked' and I wanted to be of normal weight more than I wanted food. Its like a burning desire.
People comment on how strong-willed I am and how much will power I have. But I've always been strong-willed and I have lost large amounts of weight in the past but never got all the way to a healthy weight for me. I have a lot of self-believe this time around, I've banished the negative self-talk and replaced 'I can't' or 'I won't' with 'I will'. When I started I don't think I truely believed I could get to goal but I know I have the necessary tools to get there.
One thing I have realised that is different from before is that I always used to tell myself that as long as I was 'good' 9 times out of 10 then I'd get there. Now I believe its more like 99 times out of a 100. Yes I have the occasional off-plan moment but it is occasional - like 4 or 5 times in a year not once or twice a week. For me now then if that what it takes to succeed then I'm going with it
Kitty
Wow, you are describing me. I was too skinny when I hit 20, and over the years the weight just packed on...but, I had my ups and downs. I'd half-a$$ exercise for 3 months, or semi-diet for 6 months (I don't think I -ever- gave up sodas in the past), and lose (not back to my age 20 weight)...then I'd slowly 'creep' back up past what I'd weighed when I started.
This time when I hit 200, I realized. I'm almost 40. I can't do anything about getting older, but I refuse to be old AND fat/flabby. I refuse to be unable to keep up with my kids, to be able to 'see' the world. The drive is completely different this time. I'm not looking at my WoE as a 'diet', this is a lifetime change. I'm not looking at my exercise as 'a pain that I'll do until I can fit into my skinny clothes again', but as a lifetime change. The desire was there before, but it wasn't "burning" like it is now.
I've still got a ways to go but I can tell you this time is different and there is no going back to my old ways. Heck, I'm prepping right now for climbing Mt. Fuji!
..... I bet I'm heavier than when I first joined. I guess I'm thinking my weight from a year ago - didn't realize I've been here since Sept 2006............
Just think "where" you might be if you hadn't joined here!
Keep on keeping on and never-ever give up! You just never know when that cookie you give up today turns into the ticket 2bthinagain of the future
Just think "where" you might be if you hadn't joined here!
Keep on keeping on and never-ever give up! You just never know when that cookie you give up today turns into the ticket 2bthinagain of the future
100% I agree - this giving up of just ONE cookie on just ONE certain day - may be the ticket you are looking for - the light that clicks on and tells you that you are ready.
Honestly - if I eat bad one day - I can eat bad for a whole week (not like old bad, but my new idea of bad eating!) and if I eat healthy for one day - I can eat healthy for weeks. I can honestly say that even though I have dined out multiple times over the past few weeks - that I have been 100% on plan for me for at least 3 weeks.
I know we all know about trigger foods - but sometimes they really are a pain in the arse. If I have one piece of something that is a trigger for me - it causes me to crave sugar or salt or whatever crap food I just had 100 times over.
Anyways - I'm going to finish my side of this discussion over in our FAB THREAD "That 70's Show"....I have a lot to say to you (as always) and hope to help....but that will have to wait until the morning...I have been reading this thread all day long (and another one you have been hanging out on) and plan to cheer you up and kick your butt at the same time!
I'm here for you 2bthin - as is everyone else. You can't live on the 3fatchicks....but you can definitely learn to live well through it. Talk to you in the morning...I'm up way past my bedtime!
~Amanda
Last edited by SunshineRunner; 07-01-2008 at 12:12 AM.
I can do it all and be it all for my kids -- but not for myself -- and my DH says I should also want to do this for US because the romance is really in crappy shape. I have no interest in - well you know --
I am so ashamed of my body. When we were dating I was the hot chick that everyone gave a double look too. When I'd visit him at work, heads would turn, now I avoid his office Christmas party and never ever visit his office.
If I detest looking the way I do, then why can't I fix this?
In my original post - I neglected to say that I had been thin my ENTIRE life until I had our children. Our oldest is 6. I was 133 when we were first married. And I thought I was fat at 133. ?????
Can you feel my pain and tell my heart is truly breaking?
2Bthinagain ~ I could have written the above quote myself almost word for word ... the only difference being that my kids are older! I was 132lbs when I got married, and like you, I used to make heads turn ... now, I hide myself away and hate going out for social events. I often wonder what my husband really thinks of me now ... don't get me wrong, I know he still loves me, but I often wonder if he still 'fancies' me. When I think back to how I used to be, it's hard to believe that he doesn't wish I was still the same ... I'm sure he does (I know I do!) ... and it hurts.
You can see from my joining date (2001!!) that I am still in the same position that I was when I started. I've yo-yo'd up and down for years ... but I'm never going to give up, because I know that one day I WILL get to where I want to be ... you're never a failure as long as you don't give up completely, and I intend to keep at it until I succeed!
Just want to say a huge THANK YOU to all of you who have taken the time to post and who continue to post.
I have read every word - and I'm sorry if I haven't replied yet directly to you. I am glad to know that there ARE others who have been there and truly understand. This is the hardest fight of my life.
I can do it all and be it all for my kids -- but not for myself -- and my DH says I should also want to do this for US because the romance is really in crappy shape. I have no interest in - well you know --
I am so ashamed of my body. When we were dating I was the hot chick that everyone gave a double look too. When I'd visit him at work, heads would turn, now I avoid his office Christmas party and never ever visit his office.
If I detest looking the way I do, then why can't I fix this?
In my original post - I neglected to say that I had been thin my ENTIRE life until I had our children. Our oldest is 6. I was 133 when we were first married. And I thought I was fat at 133. ?????
Can you feel my pain and tell my heart is truly breaking?
Sorry to dump on everyone, but thank you for being there.
Your words could be mine (except for the kids part!). I had a fabulous figure for many years, and now there is no way I want any of those people to see how far I've fallen. I've been walking every day for the last 7 months, and have been trying to eat a lot better, but I don't really think I've lost much weight (haven't weighed). I just get up every day and say today I'm going to walk for a longer time and try and cut out more food. It hasn't "clicked" for me either, cause I feel very deprived when I can't eat what I want to and I don't think I want it badly enough at this age (53) to really do it. For the most part I do eat pretty healthy stuff but I will have the occasional chips or too much pasta. I'm in the middle of menopause too which makes it harder. I'm not going to beat myself up daily though. Just going to keep on trucking and trying to do better.
P.S. Edited to say I don't hold back on the sex part, you will find most men are happy to sleep with you no matter if you feel gorgeous or not. It will help you with stress and will make him a lot happier, so I say just go for it. In my experience the more you do it the more you will want to do it.
You can do this...breaking that barrier is huge, but is doable. My suggestion is that you add one thing...keep a food diary, every bite every day. Like the scale it will keep you honest. My hunch is that when you get to your barrier weight you also have started eating a little more...and that is enough to stop the weight loss which then triggers more eating.
You can do this. Believe it and live it. We are here to help.
I understand what you're saying.
The first time I was on here and doing well I started at 222, and got down to 205 or so, then something happened(I'm still not 100% sure what triggered it) and I gave up on the whole endeavor.
I came back last week, determined to make this the last time I try this, to find that I weighed 237 - I've gained 32 pounds!? Yikes! Enough of that, I have to stop this stupidd cycle!
I think what triggered me to get started this time is mostly the comfort zone thing- For some reason, when I was 232-235, I wasn't bothered. But as soon as I saw I was THAT close to 240, I didn't want to do it anymore.
It wasn't JSUT that, because there was somethingthat triggered me even getting on the scale to find that out. My mom had weight loss surgery in March and she's now wearing smaller sizes than I am. I should be really happy for her, and to a certain extentt I am, but at the same time I'm really jealous - She can now shop in stores I can't, normal stores. I can't really do that right now. In addition to that, some relatives visited recently and I went shopping a couple times with my cousin. It's really depressing to be a size 18 shopping with a junior sized 9, I can tell you that. All in all I just started resenting my weight and the things that come along with it.
We're all going to have different triggers that finally make us say, "I'm really going to do it this time." I know how frustrating it is to lose, gain, lose, gain, etc. but you really just have to stick it out. That's why you have all of us here, after all!
It is 3:55pm on Tuesday - thanks to each of you who continue to post. Every single one of you have had great things to say. I wish we all lived in the same town!!! I just want to wrap my arms around you and cry on your shoulders. This is by far the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
The queen of excuses.
I guess because I was thin for the majority of my life - I've never had to struggle and work at it -- and I don't get it...I don't know how the skinny women eat cake with frosting at birthday parties -- okay yes, I do -- because they work out at the gym 2 hours a day 5 days a week.
I don't exercise NEARLY as much as I should...
And as for my DH still wanting some romance -- nope -- he's flat out admitted he is not physcially attracted -- the stomach I think is the hard part..to go from a "4 pack" to almost a double belly...(yes disgusting image), the flap over the csection scar is just lovely. Anyway -- he has admitted he is not attracted to that, and I don't blame him, yet he constantly strives to stay in shape for me. I'm telling you - my guy is a sexy man...he could totatally be in PEOPLES sexiest men alive issue. I'm sure when we're out in public people are confused -- "he's with HER?"...
Anyway -- I know all the things I "should" do, like keep the food journal, make time for myself - get up early and exercise before the kids get up - stop drinking soda -- I know those things -- then I look at the calender and I say "If I really tried 3 months ago - and stuck with it, I'd have lost 30 pounds by now".
Why? Why? Why? Why can't I do this for MYSELF and my family???
Why?
Thanks again to each of you - I need you !!! And Amanda - I'm looking forward to your post on the "that 70s thread" over in Support Groups -- everyone else - feel free to join us there too.
I know I need a swift kick in the pants - please let me have it.Thank you all SO much for letting me cry about this.
Last edited by 2Bthinagain; 07-01-2008 at 04:03 PM.
Anyway -- I know all the things I "should" do, like keep the food journal, make time for myself - get up early and exercise before the kids get up - stop drinking soda -- I know those things -- then I look at the calender and I say "If I really tried 3 months ago - and stuck with it, I'd have lost 30 pounds by now".
Pick just one thing and make the change today. Quit waiting. Take a baby step.
I suggest that you stop drinking soda. Quit it cold-turkey. It's a source of extra calories with absolutely no benefit to your body.
Do it today, stick with it for 30 days, and in a month you'll have established a new, healthy habit of NOT drinking soda.
Maybe try talking to your regular doctor about it if you haven't already?
( not for surgery or pills or anything ) ... but maybe he will have some advice about eating plans or exercise you can do .. don't give up !!! don't tell your self you can't do it ... you can and you will !
also maybe try making your self a routine with the scale ... you can slowly cut back on it even if you want...
start weighing every other day at the same time
then work up to once every two days at the same time ...until you get to
once a week same day same time everyday ... ( I had to do that , I know it sounds silly , but it's just like any other addiction ! )
Hey, I'm with you! I had lost 16 pounds last year. Then I got sick, and totally lost myself. Now, it is darn difficult to get back on track....
But, what is our alternative??! There isn't one. I guess the way I look at it is that if I don't keep trying to get back to where I need to be, I can always gain more weight. That would be devastating.
So, let's take it one day at a time... one hour/minute at a time. Fake it till you make it. Whatever cliche we need to make it work!
