Originally Posted by heavyandhomebound:
What did it for me: Having to buy a $75 bra plus having to make my own underwear!

Ha ha! But when you reach goal, will you mind spending $75 on a sexxxy French lace balconette?

Two bad things and one good thing finally led me to where I am today, successfully on a permanent lifestyle change diet.

1. Last summer my fiance and I went to the Delaware State Fair for his birthday and to see Big & Rich w/Cowboy Troy play at the Grandstand. I had always had track seating, which was close to the stage and white lawn chairs, but this time we had stadium seating. I went to sit down and couldn't. I could not fit in the chairs (although, my fiance was having a bit of trouble, as well, and he is taller/slimmer than I am) and I sat down on the stairs. The security guard came over and told me I could not sit on the stairs because it is dangerous if there is a fire (um, if theres a fire, I'm not just going to SIT there) so she told me to sit in my seat. I promptly said I could not and she said I had to show her I could not. I tried again, and she just got *****y and walked away and started talking vulgarly to another guard and pointed at me (which, I was standing in front of my seat now, making the people behind me get pissed off). I walked down the stairs and said "You know what? I'm fat. **** you. I can not fit in your toddler sized seats and most people in this country probably can't either." and walked off and cried for 10 minutes. My fiance, durring this time, asked for a manager to the complex, and told him the story, and we got VIP seating and some free merchandise for our troubles. Still sucked though. The next concert we went to there (brad paisley) I made sure I bought the tickets way in advance so we could get track seating again.

2. I looked at the scale one day and it said 305. I had gone over 300 pounds. I could not believe it. *shakes head*

3. (THE GOOD THING!!) My fiance proposed to me on Dec. 21st last year. I decided that I did not want to be morbidly obese on our wedding day, and I did not want to be a fat and unattractive bride, and I also really want to wear cute lingre for the wedding night. So we both promised eachother that we would lose weight for our wedding. So far FH has lost a total of 40 pounds since the begining of the year and I have lost 25. He has about 30 more to go to be at his goal weight of 240, and then he is going to do some toning. I have another 80 or so to be at my goal weight of 200. I may wind up changing my numbers depending on what dress size I am when it comes time for my fittings. If I can comfortably fit into a size 12, I will be content for a while, at least until after the wedding which I will start to lose more. I ultimately want to be in a size 8. Right now I have a ton of muscle and I carry my weight very well, because I'm 280 lbs, 5'7" and wear a 20. Some people tell me that they're the same stats as me and wear from a 24 all the way to a 28... So if my waist gets to be a 12, I will be content!

Oh, and thinking about this thread just made me realize something. I want to be the hot gamer geek chick who is married to the hot gamer geek guy. I want to be that unavailable hot nerd girl that the boys (and girls... *grin*) just SWOON over. I will be!

Goal Reward added to list: Pair of tripp pants and a corsett.

Originally Posted by ZedAus:
I was blissfully happy with my second husband, whom I had been married to for three and a half years. I looked across at him while were driving to do the grocery shopping and I figured that if I wanted to be alive long enough to grow old together I had better do something about my weight. Our grocery shopping that day was VERY different to grocery shopping excursions in the past.

I was similar to Glory in that I didn't decide to start 'tomorrow' or 'next week', but I started that minute and I never, once, thought that I wouldn't lose the weight I needed to. I am also like others in that I didn't go on a 'diet'. I changed my lifestyle - FOR LIFE!!!! That way, I am never going to 'stop the diet'. I just keep living my new, healthier lifestyle. It has made it SO much easier.

You truly are an inspiration. I love how positive you are in your thinking. I've been learning recently that maintenance is actually harder than losing the weight in the first place, so I just wanted to tell you that I am really inspired by your story and your Web site. I hope to do as well as you are doing!

What was your "straw that broke the camel's back"?
 

So here I am fluctuating between 215-220lbs.

I've started to believe that God (or karma, or whatever higher being you believe in) has blessed me in so many other ways that my weight is intended to be my one failure in life. I have a great job where I get to travel the world, plenty of money, a handsome and smart fiance, and a great house in a great city. I have honestly started to think that maybe, people just aren't meant to have everything they want therefore I'm destined to fail at weight loss.

I have all the motivation in the world, I know I feel better with the weight off, I love nice clothes, my fiance has announced that the reason he has virtually stopped having sex with me is due to my weight (gained 25lb since I've been with him), and I'm constantly tired and feeling ugly. I also have PCOS and the longlist of annoyances that come along with that. Somehow, it's still not enough for me to get on the horse and start tackling this one goal that eludes me. When I get to a restaurant or the grocery store, I still make the same terrible choices. I still join the gym, then get bored after a month.

I'm not sure what it's going to take for me to get down to business.

I had gone to my doc for some allergy problems I was having, about 3 months later I went in for my physical, and had gained 16 lbs in those 3 months. I then went to my dress fitting for my sisters wedding, and I had to order the largest size they had, and even then, it didn't fit very good. They told me they may have to add material. I was crushed. I've lost 53 lbs since then. My sisters wedding is Sat July 5th, and I had to get it altered, but taken in. They took it in a total of 5 inches. I am happy with my success thus far and only hope I can keep my motovation up to lost the next 50 lbs.

After weeks of thinking, I just woke up one morning and decided it was time. The driving thing for me is I feel like I'm not living up to my potential. The changes I'm making now are sweeping, they aren't just limited to weight.

Jet Set, the thing you should remember is you have to make choices for yourself. Sure, it's nice to have family and friends supporting you but the bottom line is it comes back to you. You may very well need to lose weight. However, the weight won't come off (long term) until you have made up your mind that it's time AND you are making these changes for yourself. Though I don't suffer from PCOS, I do know a lot about it. I'm sure it hurt you to hear your future husband say those things to you. I won't say anything else but I will ask did he ever stop to think that maybe your PCOS (and other side effects from it) is the reason why you gained weight?

Hugs to you and good luck.

Jetset,
I can totally relate to your story. I would resolve so often to REALLY loose this weight this time. I would go to the grocery store and buy nothing but healthy foods. then go home and eat the whole weeks worth in a day. One day I finally realized that I was putting all of the blessings in my life at risk because I would not control my eating. Perhaps I didn't feel worthy of so much good and was looking to sabotage it? I don't know. But I decided that I wanted to be IN my life and the weight was holding me back from enjoying my blessings fully. I am no longer willing to missout on any blessings, no matter how small, because of my weight.

I have a pretty strong family history of diabetes on both sides (my dad, his last surviving sister and both my grandfathers have/had it), so I always knew I better get my butt in gear sometime; but for years I had a doctor-phobia. Finally I had a problem that I couldn't ignore, and found a sympathetic doctor who did much to help me get over the phobia. She always thought my blood pressure was ok, but about 3, 4 years ago she had a health issue of her own which forced her to give up her practice (she died earlier this year :cry:), so I switched over to my mom's doctor. He was not so pleased with my bp and first put me on meds, then suggested that I come back in a month and try to lose 3 # by then and 10 # in the next year. I lost 10 pounds in the first month alone and that convinced me I could do it

Okay, I'm probably the worst person to give relationship advice. However, if you've gained weight since you've been together - what is he going to do to help you lose weight. Assuming that you live together, and eat meals together, the new lifestyle you've chosen is contributing to your weight gain.

(If you live separately then there are different issues.)

I'm not sure I like the line "my fiance has announced that the reason he has virtually stopped having sex with me is due to my weight". I wonder if/when he gains 25 lbs would he consider it acceptable for you not to want to have sex? I suspect not.

So, join a gym together. Spend time cooking together (always healthier than eating out). You can make nice meals, just give him a slightly larger percentage of the dish. Find a healthy activity you both enjoy. Work on a better lifestyle together. Start your life together in a better way. If he just wants to sit on the couch eating chips and complaining about your weight gain.... well, you probably won't like the advice I'd give you.

Here's another current thread with a nearly identical title!

http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=144356

Sorry about posting the same thread, Glory87. I should have searched, but I'm not sure what I would have searched for and there is no way I would have thought someone else would use the camel analogy! Great minds, I suppose.

As for my fiance, he has always been a hardcore weightlifter and outdoorsman and continues to be. I joined the gym because he really wanted me to go with him and I got bored after a month and stopped making time for it. He has encouraged me to have a better lifestyle and I have turned it down.

We do live seperately and I have most of my meals alone. I took a promotion since we've been together that lessened my travel and led to me being more sedentary which contributed to the 25lbs. It's 100% my fault that I'm fat, there is just nothing giving me a big enough kick in the behind to do something about it. He was absolutely not trying to be hurtful and I wanted to know why our sex life had dwindled. I appreciated his honesty and wouldn't have tolerated a lie.

I lack motivation so that's why I wanted to see other ladies' primary motivators.

djay -- I have done the exact same thing before. I have went to the store, bought the healthy stuff, then ate it all in a day as well. It's a rotten feeling.

I LOVED my lane bryant pants... even fat I thought hey these look cute! lol But I had worn them for two years- two different pair constantly switching lol between them and my shorts of course lol and with both pairs of pants worn out... my mother thought it was nice to go get me just something to wear until she came home with rather large pair of mens sweat pants... I was like.. there's no way these will fit!!! I can't wear them I have to deal with the public... SUPRISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL Not only were they awful but they fit!! lol That was around Christmas... They no longer 'fit' but they are my motivation :)

Rach

The final straw for me was realizing that my son is almost three months old, and there are many women on my birth board who have not only lost their baby weight, but are on their way towards their ultimate goals. I simply cannot blame this state of being on pregnancy any more :(

So I set my resolve to get serious. I'm on day 3 of SBD Phase 1 and going strong :) My husband has agreed to do it with me this time, and his support is really helping me stick to it.

My motivation though, I had him take before pictures for me both from the front and from the side (heck, I should have done one from the back huh?) and I was disgusted. I knew I'd gotten big, but the camera doesn't add 10 lbs -- the camera simply tells the brutal truth. And boy howdy was it brutal!

So I dug out a pair of size 10 skinny jeans and have them hanging in my bedroom so they're the last thing I see when I go to bed and the first thing I see when I get up in the morning! I WILL fit those jeans!

Jess

Originally Posted by RealCdn:
Okay, I'm probably the worst person to give relationship advice. However, if you've gained weight since you've been together - what is he going to do to help you lose weight. Assuming that you live together, and eat meals together, the new lifestyle you've chosen is contributing to your weight gain.

(If you live separately then there are different issues.)

I'm not sure I like the line "my fiance has announced that the reason he has virtually stopped having sex with me is due to my weight". I wonder if/when he gains 25 lbs would he consider it acceptable for you not to want to have sex? I suspect not.

So, join a gym together. Spend time cooking together (always healthier than eating out). You can make nice meals, just give him a slightly larger percentage of the dish. Find a healthy activity you both enjoy. Work on a better lifestyle together. Start your life together in a better way. If he just wants to sit on the couch eating chips and complaining about your weight gain.... well, you probably won't like the advice I'd give you.

Good advice, RealCdn. It is so true that it is a lifestyle when 2 people are living their lives together. What one does affects the other. By the way, I wanted to comment that your stats are so inspiring.