If I had been born an elephant

  • If I had been born an elephant my life would be so much different!
    I would spend most of my time with other elephants, so my size wouldn’t matter.
    In fact, if I had been born an elephant, bigger would be better.
    No one would make mean comments about my wide bottom and thick ankles.
    My heavy feet wouldn’t get in the way and no one would expect me to run on a treadmill everyday.
    If I had been born an elephant it wouldn’t seem odd that I ate only vegetation yet still gained weight.
    I wouldn’t have to stick to the bushes and avoid all flash photography.
    The other elephants would be content to graze next to me swatting flies at a leisurely pace.
    The males wouldn’t be eyeballing sleek gazelles or muscular tigers,
    no other possible mate would cross their mind but another frumpy gray elephant.
    If I had been born an elephant a nice coating of dust would be admirable.
    There would be no food support groups or anguish about the research on harms of diet soda.
    I wouldn’t need to wear ‘the newest technology in bathing suits’ to cinch this or minimize that.
    I wouldn’t owe the library for a lost diet book that was checked out with 20 others to find the magic cure!
    Green grass would be extremely appitizing and water the only thing that I thirsted for.
    I was not born an elephant.
    I was born a beautiful, sleek, muscular panther that became an elephant over time.
    The panther that still exists trapped in an impossible body.
    I wish to be free and run like the wind but must slow down due to all the excess caused by excess.
    The panther that is admired by many and feared by even more,
    trapped and hiding in the shrubs and avoiding flash photography.
    So use to sleek lines and shiny fur but carrying dusty folds of flab instead.
    Watching all of the other panthers romp and play while I gaze at my heavy feet and swat flies.
    If I had been born an elephant...my life would be so much different.



    A bit silly, but something I threw together one afternoon when I was actually supposed to be concentrating on a whole different saga of poems! I was feeling very elephant today when I weighed and discovered that I had gained 10 pounds in one week. Hoping that most of it is water weight or something!!!! I decided to post this because I thought a few others might be feeling a little like elephants and less like panthers. Those of you that aren't......please incourage those of us who are.
  • My goodness, I've never read anything like that before... I loved it...

    I feel like the elephant sometimes usually after a carb binge. I also have days that I feel like a gazelle breezing thru my workouts.... then some days I feel like the ostrich filled with denial.... Yikes.. I think I could go through the entire animal kingdom.... You will feel like a panther again... stay strong, you can do it.....
  • readyforrealme---What a wonderful poem! Brought all kinds of images and feelings to mind. Today I feel like an elephant...but I'm still trying, and tomorrow I might feel like a koala or a deer or an emerald tree boa... :-) Thanks for posting your poetry!
  • I actually always identified more with being a giraffe--mostly because of my height!

    But, I used to go to the zoo and sketch the animals, and the more I studied the giraffes, the more I identified with them! They are impossibly tall and impressive, they are big-bottomed, slightly awkward, and they look gentle and kind but you just know they could destroy you with one kick if you piss them off!

    Hey! That's me!
  • Rooooorrrrrrw panther!
  • How cool! Thanks for sharing. I feel a bit like a chubby panther today...I have that "eye of the tiger" going on but my body is slowing me down now that it's the end of the day.
  • That is wonderfully written. thank you for sharing it.
  • I really love your poem! Be sure to throw kisses to all the animals...

    Jay
  • Hey be glad you weren't born an elephant, you'd be pregnant for two years! In seriousness though I liked you're writing, I was thinking today I was feeling like a hippo when I got out of the pool and was surrounded by lots of thin pretty young girls (swimming camp on). But I figured at least I'm a fit hippo, and you know hippo's are pretty damn dangerous
  • Thanks Everyone!

    Apple Cheeks- It's funny you mentioned giraffes. Not too long ago I took my kids and niece to the zoo. My niece isn't afraid of anything and usually gets into more rambuctious trouble than 20 kids her age put together! She had been enjoying every animal and making as many animal sounds as she knew (she's 3) until we rounded the corner to the viewing window into the giraffes barn. Fully framed in the window as this 2 foot three year old looked up was the largest hinney she had ever seen!!!! It took me three other exhibitions to catch up to her!---We avoided the elephants!

    SweetCaroline- I know what you mean! This weekend I helped a friend move and felt like a pack mule all weekend! I love it when I feel like an eagle! Sometimes even when I am just jogging along the bayou I feel like I am flying!
  • Thanks for sharing that!