Ok, so let me rant for a moment please so I can get this out and please let me know if I am just crazy or just i don't know.

I am 27 and recently found that I am at my unhappiest weight since I was 21. My weight has fluctuated all my life and I have resigned myself to the fact that I will never be skinny like some of the top models out there, but it still killed me to look at the scale and see 220. I would sit and think, that wasn't me was it? I took into account that I recently had a baby and everythng but theres only so long you can use that excuse. WEll, my son is now almost a year and a half and I am still overweight. I mean something is wrong if the BMI considers me obese!
So as of January 1 2008 I have started to bust my butt and try to kill off weight. I set an insane goal of 80 pounds by june, 60 by april for my brothers wedding, which means 5 pounds a week. I have cut back on a lot of greasy foods and drink nothing but water anymore so I FEEL better. I have the ablounge to help me too and do a bagillion crunches a day, ok maybe not that many but I do at least an hour on that thing a day and you can feel it.
My thing is that I am doing this... completely and utterly ALONE. My husband is working 12-15 hours a day and doesn't even try to do anything to lose his weight. My best friend weighs maybe at most 110lbs and all my siblings are skinny with high metabolisms.
I just feel like I am doing this and getting nowhere because I work so hard and all I hear is my own critisizing thoughts about how I'm only losing water weight and gaining it back and will never lose this weight.
I just am tired of feeling alone with this and hope it isn't forever.

ok I'm done now.

Yup, that's insane! But we'll get to that in a minute

First, you aren't alone! Have you looked down at the bottom of the forum page and seen how many people are members here at 3FC? We aren't here because we are naturally thin! Every one of us is currently trying to lose weight or trying to maintain a weight loss forever. If your family is thin and your husband isn't trying, come here for support. Yes, I know first hand that it's hard to maintain your way of eating when you live with someone who either brings foods that aren't healthy for you to eat into the house or wants you to cook or join him in eating meals that you know are going to hinder your progress, but you have to know what YOU want for YOU. Come here and post. Find one of the many groups on this board with whom you have something in common. Keep this thread alive and rant or tell us how you're doing. You're not alone But honestly, if you want to change something about your life, you are the one who has to take the responsibility to do it.

Now about that goal! I completely understand why you want that, but it's not realistic to do that in a healthy way and keep the weight off. You may lose 5 pounds a week for the first week or two, maybe three, but that rate of loss just isn't maintainable for very long. My suggestion is to pick a healthy way of eating and exercising and work on maintaining that lifestyle. The weight will come off. With a set in stone goal like that, what happens the second week that you don't see such a dramatic weight loss? Don't set yourself up for failure like that

Learn to eat healthy foods, move more, find a maintainable lifestyle which will enable you to take off the weight and keep it off.

And stick around- lots of folks here know exactly what you are going through! (BTW, it took me 15 years before I woke up and lost the "baby fat"!)

Mel

I hear ya. My husband can eat anything he wants and never gains a pound. He's 6'4" and skinny. He doesn't do anything to help me with the weight loss but he does support me. I almost wish he was a little meaner so if I wanted something I shouldn't have he could keep me on my toes....but no, he says he loves me the way I am. (although he loves me smaller too...lol.)

All of my family is average. Not skinny but not big. And all of his is quite large so when I'm around them there is always food. They make me feel bad for dieting but I let it go in one ear and out the other.

Ok, sorry for hyjacking your post but wanted to let you know you are NOT alone!

NOT alone, chick - you're HERE, and we're all here with ya!

First, WELCOME!!

Second, you will never be alone on this journey with 3FC on your radar. Visit and post often. The support here is second to none!

Third, ummmm....about that goal....timed goals can be discouraging. Losing 5 pounds is a victory, whether it is in one week or one month. Think how much better you will feel as the pounds leave you. It really doesn't matter how fast they go as long as they GO! And consistency and patience are the keys to weight loss. I know you will reach your goal....when it will happen I cannot say but better to be there someday than to stay the same, right?

midwife (and I still have baby fat 12 years later!! heehee!)

First and foremost thank you all for your kind words of support and care.
I know I set myself for a huge goal, it's not going to be easy and losing baby weight i find is harder than losin regular me fat. This is my second time around with losing the baby fat due to an unsuccessful first pregnancy that ended 6 months in and the depression weight gained didn't help either.

Currently I feel good... sometimes I feel like all this work is paying off and I might actually fit into my old clothes, other times i want to hide in bed all day. I am losing weight pretty steady but i am not going to get my hopes too high and think I am going to meet that 5 pound per week goal every week. I will keep all updated on my progress though.

My frame, as I describe it, is that of a hockey player, broad shouldered and under all the fat I've acquired is muscle... my calves are pure muscle, my thighs used to be too but again, baby fat made me get bigger thighs and a butt. I tend to cover up my body so on a 5'7 frame people are amazed when I say I am over 200lbs.

I just want to be down at least 60lbs before I go and have another baby and believe me with the looks my husband has when seeing newborn babies, he wants another soon.

Ok, enough again hehe I will post when I find out my total weight loss for the week on Sunday.

Later Days

Ok, but please do moderate your expectations about the amount of weight you will be able to lose each week (particularly after the first couple of weeks). It is virtually impossible to lose 5 pounds a week, particularly without engaging in some very unhealthy practices. If you manage to lose 2lb per week (on average) you should be very pleased with your progress.

WEll here we are Sunday the 13th, a week from when I started my weight loss hopes... and I am down 5 lbs!

Alison - that's awesome! for your fabulous work!

Great job! Good luck and this site and the users here are wonderful for support!

Hi Alison! Great job on your weight loss & exercise efforts. Message boards like this are great for support. I think so many of us here are pretty much on our own too & it is nice to be able to talk with people who understand everything that goes on when trying to lose weight.

About your goal...I would say that all you can do is your best in terms of dieting & exercise. It took me about 15 months to lose 120#s & one thing I have learned during this time is that I have NO control over what my body is going to do. All I can do is follow my diet & exercise routines & try not to get frustrated & disappointed when the numbers on the scale don't meet my expectations. Time goes by quickly & those incremental losses add up.

This site has a TON of info on various diet plans & lots of people who have followed them & been successful. I love looking at the tickers & seeing how well people are doing! Another thing I discovered was that sometimes a particular diet doesn't work well for you & trying another one may make losing weight easier.

Good luck on your weight loss journey!

i read your post and it was like i was reading my own! i had a baby, she is now 18-months-old and although i lost most of the weight from her, it all came back! my family is all of average weight, and then there is me, big girl my whole life through. it sounds like we probably have the same type of build too. i'm tall, 5'10" and weigh 293. to look at me, people don't believe that is what i weigh. i am muscular under my layers. my husband and i are wanting to have another baby, but i have told him that until i get my weight under control and down i'm not getting pregnant! i have big goals for my weight loss, but i am taking it all one day at a time. i did lose 6 pounds my first week and into my second i am down another 4 so far, but i don't expect that to continue for too much longer (unfortunately)! good luck and congrats on your first 5!

We're here to help you and give support. Let's start with a SANE goal. 5 pounds a week is UNHEALTHY. 1-2 pounds a week is all you can lose and stay healthy. You will lose more the first few weeks, but it will taper off. Setting your goal too high can lead to abandoning your efforts when you fail to meet it.

So I am just checking in again to report my progress. I didn't meet the 5lb goal, but that is fine because as I see it, any weight is good and havign my shirts and pants feel loose again is great!
I lost 3-3.5 pounds, scales are a pain
So I am now down to 202 which is awesome because before Feb hits I want to be at least 200 if not below it. With having the monthly woman issues i knew the weight wasn't going to come off as willingly but I am still doig my crunches, my aerobics, and eating well.