Well...nothing I have done has stuck with me. I know the reasons. 1.) Willpower. I haven't had it since a year and a half ago. 2.) Too many restrictions lead me to feeling deprived.

Does it take awhile to feel different (excited) about your weight loss? I get a little excited when I get to 242...then I just blow it. I know I would have willpower if I was under 241...but I feel bad I'm that petty.

I feel so restricted from the rules I put on myself when dieting. It's been so long and I am just yo-yoing between 242 and 250. I never get past that because I'm not changing my habits.

I know if I lose this quick and deprive myself I'll find myself with it all back again. I would really love to make some lifestyle changes and feel in control. I don't know what's keeping me...

With the birthday gone, tomorrow we're going grocery shopping and I'm going to buy some "sensible" foods. I don't want to say healthy because when I think of healthy I think of Special k, cheese sticks, and yogurt. And those few things I starved on.

Sensible eating (not fried foods or even depriving myself of eating out)...is just making the best food choice possible.

I would love to just put the following in action: 3 meals of sensible eating...a walk everyday...and choosing the healthiest choice I have wherever and whenever I might be.

I know losing weight is an easy concept...but it's so hard. I know it doesn't have to be..but my family isn't going to change the type of foods they buy so I'm just gonna have to take it in my own hands to stay out of it.

-=sighs=- I'm done with time limits and restrictions. I just want to learn how to eat better and to create new habits.

Anyone have some insight for me?

(And yes, May 25th was my birthday. I have a year until I'm 18. My greatest goal is to be a healthy weight by then).

Hey Gamer,

Sorry you're feeling down. I know you've had a hard time, but give yourself a little credit here. You've been trying to stay with sensible eating for some time now. And it's really a challenge to do that when you don't buy your own food--you don't have as much control over what there is to eat.

I had to smile when you said:
Because those are some of my staple foods! Not the Special K--but something like it. I take it you no longer like those foods?

You seem to be struggling with the idea of eating "right" vs. eating what you want or eating what is available. The folks here who are most successful are those who stick to a program of some kind. It's really necessary for the long haul, when a person has more than 10 or 15 pounds to lose. Yes, it means some restriction--there is no way around that, I'm afraid. I would say that virtually all of us gained weight by eating without restriction.

Here's a thought--go to the 3FC main page and browse some of the book reviews. Maybe you'll find some new ideas to inspire you.


Jay

I wonder if a thread like this might help you.
http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=113085
The folks post their menus so you can check what they are eating.

Mudpie is talking about doing a challenge. You could try to stick with decent foods for the duration or walk everyday for a certain amount of time. Nothing complex, just a good new habit reinforced over a short time span. A week or two or three.

We did a 21 day challenge just recently and it was extremely interesting how many of us lost our way on about day 5 or 6. But it didn't matter much. No pressure. You just start up again. 4 or 5 good days with an oops between is better than nothing right?

I kind of think my plans are kind of horrible for me...and unrealistic.

Do you think I should have 3 meals and some snacks, too?

Is an hour walk too much to ask for everyday?

And if I were to count calories, what would be a good number?

I should really stop trying to lose the weight so quickly and just do what I can do. When I feel comfortable I feel like I'm not doing it right XD But a few of those days and I'm at 242. I just feel guilty that it's so easy...I worry far too much.

I would just like help to create a plan for me.

I often have a lot of time to myself, and the exercise I like to do it is walking. I find walking for an hour easy, but I guess I'm just at a light pace.

I'm working on my sleep, which I feel is my excuse to eat poorly. But I'm staying up all today and getting it on track for tomorrow.

For the dieting part, I know a lot of people are calorie counters. I would like to be one, but I'm known for obsessing. I'm starting to see the foods I usually eat (not the best choices) as gross, probably because it makes me feel like crap when I eat it.

I'm really all for buying my own foods and going the healthy way again. I know I can stick to my own foods, even though it will be hard.

The biggest thing is that I don't really know where the spectrum of healthy food ends. I also feel like healthy food is such a small variety. I know there are lots of veggies and fruits. I look at recipes and get scared because when you make things it takes oils sometimes and other things that add calories to it. It makes that new dish seem not as good, health-wise, as it should be.

I think this is all a warped perception of mine...I am very willing to try to fix.

I feel guilty that I need more than 3 meals to satisfy me, when I am getting hungry between them.

For me, when I eat out I spaz when the calorie count is over the top, and I count it...feel bad for the extra amount then try to make up for it the next week which deprives me in my head then I blow it.

I guess I need to forgive and forget?

Sure! You don't want to be starving between meals. And don't eat anything you don't like.

As for the walk, try to think of something easy to stick to. If you think you could do 20 min 3X/week, do that and build your way up. It's much easier to do that than try to get all gung ho and burn out.

On the other hand, if one hour is reasonable for you, go right ahead. Just don't beat yourself up too hard if you don't fulfill your expectations. Baby steps.

Only you know the answers for you Gamer. Can YOU stick with a one hour walk every day? If you can't, then why not start with just doing it 3 days a week? Or, why not even do just ONE walk a week and do something else on other days if just walking tends to get boring after awhile. If you're having trouble sticking to anything, you need to find out why you're having that trouble and work around that. Are you getting bored with certain exercises, running out of time, what? If its time, there are ways to work it in that people might be able to help with. If its boredom, try different exercises. If its just the time of day that's not working, try a different time.

On the eating, same thing. If you're getting bored with Special K, try something else. There are LOTS of healthier cereals out there. Actually, Special K isn't even one of the healthiest choices, but it's healthIER than Froot Loops. LOL Healthiest choices would be Kashi and similar. Healthier would be bran flakes, Cheerios (not the foo foo ones either), Special K and such. Just try different cereals. Or, have some oats instead of a cold cereal. Have eggs and whole wheat toast, whole wheat bagels. Just put down the donut.

Do you like apples? They're filling. And if you find yourself craving something, fill up on those first and see if that helps. If not, try anything you do like, keep it in stock and reach for it BEFORE you decide to reach for something else. Try it with a glass of water too. Doing that may help you to eat less of the other foods you may be craving even if you do give into the cravings.

What kinds of foods does your family buy? My guess is they at least buy chicken? So if mom's frying it up, grab a couple pieces from the batch, peal the skin, and stick em on the broiler for you. I'm sure they often also have some kind of veggie with their meals? Put more of that on your plate and less of the other stuff. Or keep salad material on hand and fix yourself a large salad before the meal. You can STILL eat what they're eating, but this will help you eat less of it. It will also help keep you from getting bored with your foods because you'll be eating everything and not restricting yourself. You'll only be consuming less of the unhealthier foods.

I don't participate in the journal thread, so figured I'd give you a sample of my yesterday foods.

Breakfast:
1 scrambled egg
1 whole wheat toast with Brummel and Brown yogurt spread

Snack:
Yogurt

Lunch:
Low Carb Whole Wheat tortilla with deli ham and light veggie cream cheese and a pickle
6 baby carrot sticks
Half a large apple

Snack:
Fresh pineapple

Dinner:
Grilled salmon
Long grain brown rice
Birdseye steamed mixed veggies

Snack:
Watermelon

I'm not eating the same things over and over again and I ate....allllllllll day. Other days I might have whole wheat pancakes for breakfast. I top them with All Fruit spread, bananas and fat free whipped cream. Sometimes I'll do oatmeal with some brown sugar and/or raisins. Or Raisin Bran with skim milk. Or I'll have a yogurt and apple for breakfast and string cheese as a snack instead of the fruit again. And there are limitless options for fruits. I keep bananas, red and golden apples, fresh pineapples, watermelon, grapes, strawberries and oranges on hand daily. I LOVE my fruit. I've replaced my candy addictions with those.

I do the same thing with my exercise. One day I'll hit the park and walk/run, the next, I'll get on my stair stepper and stay home, or I'll pop in a WATP video. I don't relegate myself to the same time to exercise either. I just make sure to fit at least 30 minutes into my day somewhere. Sometimes, I may even have to break that up into two 15 minute sessions. Its easier for me to find ways of getting it done than it is to strictly regulate myself to certain exercises, certain foods, certain times...to a rigid plan that I'm going to get bored with and stop doing.

I wonder if part of the problem is the 'creating a plan'. You could try letting a plan develop.
Go shopping ... see what's there. Plain, natural foods. Circle the store don't go up the center aisles. When in doubt have a green salad while you think about what to have for your next meal.
You don't need a lifelong plan to begin with. You only have to plan what to do next.
In another thread I frequent, we were talking about BTN ... better than nothing. Any walk is BTN. You don't have to plan out your entire week (not for starters), you just need to do something that is BTN.

I think for awhile I will do my best to eat healthily and join in with everyone on the planning threads. That way I can see how others are eating and feel a part of something.

It's hard to do it alone...I don't think I'd be so overwhelmed if I was doing something with someone else.

You may want to try intuitive eating.

That's the only plan that works for me because there is nothing to count and no foods are off limits. However I do try to eat as many unprocessed foods as possible because they are high in nutrition and they don't make me feel lousy like processed foods do.

However I didn't start eating mainly healthy foods overnight. I slowly added them to my diet and made substitutions like whole wheat bread instead of white bread.

Hey Gamer,

I have another insight for you--and it has to do with trust.

I know from your previous posts on other threads that you have a challenging home life. I think that has left you feeling like you have to take care of everything yourself. Also, I think maybe it makes you try to second-guess these food plans. This is just a thought I'm having--it may not be true for you.

You say you get scared when making recipes because some ingredients add calories. Well, if you are following a food program, and using the recipes from the program, then the recipes have been designed to be OK for you to use. So you don't HAVE to think about how much oil, how much this, how much that. See what I mean? You just go ahead and do it.

You have gotten lots of suggestions on 3FC over the past several months--and of course you don't want to take all of them--but it seems like when all is said and done, you end up deciding to do it "your way." And then you have trouble. So, why not choose a food program to follow for two months? There are many approaches, and you can read about them by going to the 3FC main page and browsing.

But the point is to stick with one thing, and not give up and switch to something else every couple weeks.

Hang in there, Gamer!
Jay

I agree 100%. My plans fail because they are mine and I am what they call a perfectionist and overachiever (although I don't achieve much!)

But SusanB gave me a link to a site and I've been reading it...I'm thinking about going a gym and getting into some weightlifting.

You're very right when I say I feel I have to do everything myself. I do second guess a lot. I haven't felt excitement for any plan I've had in a long time.

And I think things have changed for me (in my perception) in just a few hours!

" I used to model and eat NOTHING and that is when I let my weight training go. I steadily got fat over several years even though I was eating NOTHING. At 31%BF I got sick of being sick and started to lift again. The fat fell off. Just fell off. Eating 1800-2000 cals a day. I felt like I was stuffing myself compared to what I had been doing and now that I ripple with muscle instead of fat I kinda like those silly step classes again just to watch the other, younger girls wince with pain when the burn kicks in."

Just that makes me just throw that whole starving thing away. I haven't been to any pro-ana sites in a long time, but it has always been in the back of my head to turn to. But I feel like embracing a whole new lifestyle not because I feel like I have to, but because I WANT to.

Maybe weight lifting and just taking the healthy approach will give me the kick I need to feel the change. I'm very excited...

I'm going to stop worrying so much about calories and focus on getting carbs, proteins, and good fats into my meals from now on. The site SusanB explained it without the scientific crap so I can understand why they're so important.

The quote from above gives me liberation from the whole starving view of dieting. I guess I realize now that low-cal doesn't keep the weight off and I need to make changes to my activity level and my eating. I feel like with these things I can somehow get my control back.

I'm so excited...I don't think I care about the numbers on the scale anymore (I wish I could throw it out but my sister uses it so much--she's lost nearly 30 pounds from her baby).

All these things give me the trust I need...and for the first time I have belief in myself again!

GRR! I don't want to deprive myself anymore! I'm gonna make good choices for me NOW...not my future self!

Thanks everyone. I know I appear so fickle but I sincerely am very excited...for the very first time in a very long time. You know...when it clicks it clicks? I think I have been waiting for this (the information to do well).

Gamer, I think you know what to do, now DO IT!!!For me when I am motivated, nothing can stop me, if I could bottle motivation and sell it I would become a millionaire,I can't help you on that point , but I do suggest do something now, if you don't it will get more difficult.I know you want to do it and I think you can.