Stupid eight year old... and breasts.
 

What do you do when you're feeling better about yourself, wearing a pretty SIZE 6 DRESS, and still there's always someone to bring you crashing down. In this case it was an eight year old where I volunteer, who put her hand on my stomach and asked if I was pregnant, because her mom is pregnant and this is what her belly looks like. *cringe*:o :o :o . Really painful. I thought I was DONE with that, damn it, I'm THIN, right? Apparently not. I've started doing 100 sit ups every day but its not showing yet - the probelm is this little belly fat layer, and I've been lazy on the last 10 pounds I really want off. But really, this would be a good goal weight. Ugh. I don't know.:dizzy: :?:

The other thing I've been crazy self conscious about is my breasts, which went from DDs to C/Ds, and you can kind of tell. I was sunbathing topless with my friend, who recently got a reduction from E to B, and she kept making comments about it... I just feel like crap about it, :( my boobs look great in clothing but I'm so self conscious about them on their own. The hardest part is that my MOTHER, at 47 years old, has exactly the same breasts I do, but perkier. After two children. That's painful. :o Why is my feeling of self worth so wrapped up in the shape of my breasts? I don't want them to look like implants, I don't want to get surgery for them, but I can't help being frustrated with the way they are now. :?: :?: help?

So stupid eight year old, and stupid boobs.

Oh the dreaded pregnancy mistake. :hug: It can ruin anyones day. A couple of years ago, i had lost 100 pounds. Talk about feeling confident. I was shopping for new clothes for my newly skinny body, but i was wearing a shirt that was too big. A woman came up to me and said, "oh, when are you expecting?" I was SO embarrased i made up some fake month that i thought sounded right and left the store almost in tears. :cry: Its terrible. So yes, in your case, Stupid 8 year old. In my case, Stupid grown woman. :mad:

I am VERY insecure about my boobs too though. Mine look fine in clothes as well, but without the bra, not only do they sag, but they sag unevenly. :fr: YIKES. i am a C cup when heavy, a medium B when i lose 100....so will i end up an A when i get to goal? I have no hips, i will look like a thin boy. :o Bummemr. But better a thin boy than a fat woman, ha ha ha ha. :D

So just know, the mistaken pregnancy happens to A LOT of women. I think sometimes it can be something so simple as a shirt billowing out more than it should, or just a way we shift our weight when we stand. I dont think it means we actually look pregnant, or at least that is what gives me comfort, ha ha.

I dont know what to do about the boobs, just be glad you have some, unlike me when i get to goal. ;)

If you're rocking a size 6, I wouldn't let some little brat bring you down! You've made amazing progress, are at a healthy weight, and I'm sure you look fabulous.

As for the boobs, we all have things that make us insecure when the clothes come off: stretch marks, moles, general imperfections. If they look good under clothes, rock on! If they don't look so great without clothes, who cares? The only people who will see are you and whomever you choose to be intimate with, and I have a feeling that a date would not care what they look like and would just be thrilled that you're sharing!

Hmmm...this too has happened to me. It actually happened a lot when I was 13-17 years old *rolls eyes* They were all kids though. Little kids would ask why I was so fat and their mommy wasn't and older kids would ask when the baby was coming. I just got used to it, unfortunatly. I wish it would've bothered me because maybe then it would have motivated me.

Don't let it get you down. If the weight you're at now seems like a good goal weight then just work on toning. :) Toning should slim down your tummy and probably will make you lose a couple-few pounds. You've done great, don't let a "stupid eight year old" ;) get you down.

About the boobs....I will be close to a small B or A when I lose my weight, so don't fret. I'm actually looking to get implants and a lift when I lose my weight because of how small I will be. Right now I'm a C, but most of it is armpit fat. *chuckles* :)

A bit of a rant in response...
 

AAARGH the dreaded pregnancy question!!!!!!

I HATE the dreaded pregnancy question, it is definitely one of my buttons and I have been putting up with this cr@p from ignorant pig-headed people since before i was married (when I was slimmer than I was now).... It is really offensive because I was infertile/subfertile and it took me forever to conceive, and the endless wot-no-babies? questions for 5 years were really, really hurtful.

And where I come from, you JUST. DON'T. ASK. Especially if you're a stranger and don;t know the woman's background or situation or marital status. I now respond with a "Oh, I'm not pregnant, I'm FAT" and it makes the bozos shrivel up and slither away and good riddance. If they say "But I didn't mean anything" I say "Oh yes you did. You saw something (fat belly) and didn't have the decency to keep quiet about it."

Grr. Snarl.

BUT I could make an excuse for an 8 year old who is all excited about mommy having a baby in her tummy. 8 y.o. kids aren;t known for tact and diplomacy. I have an 8 y.o. and she is a social klutz at times and gets frequent lectures ("Notice what you like, think what you want, ask me about it later when we get home but Keep Your Trap Shut In Public"). So I would let the kid off and try to be charitable and gracious about it.

What is NOT excusable is anyone over the age of, say, 12 making such comments. They get shot down in flames around here.

Heh.

Is there a full moon tonight? :devil:

All I can say about the boobs issue is that I think a "friend" who keeps making comments about it isn't much of a friend and deserves a lecture along the lines of the first part of this post. Or to be "decluttered" from your social life.

Since I hit the big 4-oh I am really not in a mood to take people's cr@p anymore... :p

Hehehe, little kids. I volunteer in a first grade classroom, kids don't really have any idea about social grace. They'll walk right up to the teacher and play with the flab on her arms and jiggle my fat while they hug me. They don't mean anything by it, they're just excited and don't know that things are hurtful. Plus if the kids mom is pregnant, thats what he's thinking about. Babies on the brain.

Ugh. The pregnancy thing is awful. But I find it hard to believe that at 5'7 and 140lb, you look pregnant to anyone other than an excited 8 year old. Don't sweat it.

I have the boob trouble too. Mine have always been a D or DD and now they're down to a C. Tiny! And flappy! Gaining and losing weight has *definitely* taken a toll on them--I'm pretty sure I have the same boobs as a woman who has had children and breastfed them. I find it tragic. Having big breasts has always been an important part of my physical identity--I wore my first D-cup bra when I was 14 and skinny--and I have found it very difficult to adjust to being of average size. So I compensate with excellent underwear. No one but my boyfriend and myself needs to know that once I get nekkid, my boobs look truly terrible. I have underwire in all my bras, even my sports bras and my bikini. I prefer moulded cups for the extra support most of the time. As long as I can fool the world, I can live with their droopiness--probably.

I can only comment on the boob thing.... but have you tried push up if you can't do the ones on the floor ( I can't myself I can only do about 5) you can do them against the wall. Another exercise is I think they are call flys - you lay on the floor on your back and use weight bring your arms together and then back to the floor. You have to work on your pec muscels which will help perk up your boobs. Good luck. And congrats on being a size 6 that is my goal.

I find acting confused it the funniest response I can give ... it gives me an internal laugh.

"Oh, when are you expecing?" (excited stranger)
"Expecting? expecting what???" (look of daze, like I've missed something)
"The baby"
"Baby? Who's baby? Where's the baby?" (look of utter confusion)

Once, a women asked me something similar when I first starting putting on weight. I asked if she would like to feel my belly, but didn't mention anything about a baby.

Then she touched it, and asked if it was a boy or a girl. I looked confused and asked "Is what a boy or girl???"

She pretty much ran away. I still see her sometimes at the store and she always avoids me.

Once I got The Question in an elevator, and I said, "Oh, I'm not pregnant, I'm just fat." The person who asked wanted to shrivel up into nothing and die! Didn't bother me much at all.

With a child, it is an innocent enough question. One just has to say "Oh, I'm not having a baby--sometimes ladies look like this anyway."

As for breast sizes--sigh--don't know what to tell you. Mine are not the same size, either, and they never have been. But I have so many more important things going on in my life that I guess I hardly ever think of it!

Jay

MoragMunch, that was hilarious!! :carrot: :carrot: :carrot:

doing crunches everyday won't really help much, sorry to say...abs are the same as every other muscle group and benefit from being worked twice or three times a week. I find cardio helps most for losing fat.

As for the boobs, whoever recommended lifting weights was right on. It helps a lot.

OMG, I'm cracking up! :rofl: That's priceless!

There was a note on my dental chart last year that said NO X-RAYS. Of course, I am in the dental chair, semi-pike position, pushing all my fat right to my belly. The assistant comes in and says, "No x-rays...when are you due?" I just said I had already had the baby but was not doing x-rays because I was still nursing. She said they had never had that before, only pregnant women refused x-rays. She probably thought she covered well, but she didn't...

Oh hun - I'm 5' 7 and 160lbs and look pretty great, so you at 140lbs must look amazing! Just put it down to stupid kids :-)

I hear what you're saying on the boobs though...I never had much before but I definitely don't now :-(

I got "The Question" from a three year old a couple of weekends ago. His mom is my best friend, and she is pregnant (due at the end of August). In his case, I think that he thinks that EVERY woman is pregnant, so it didn't bother me. When he did it though, I was slouched on the couch and my stomach was really sticking out so I'm sure it didn't help! I just said "No, I don't have a baby. That's just how my stomach is!" and he just said "Oh!" and that was it.

He also pointed to my chest that weekend and said "Mommy has those too!" so I couldn't look too much into it hahaha.

Haha, hearing your stories helps so much. I didn't know that push ups really made a difference, I'll absolutely try it if you guys say it does. As for the stomach, I'm hoping a summer backpacking with almost no cash for food will do the trick. Nothing like the imminent threat of a bikini to make you get back on track... *sigh*

Thanks all.

The 8 year old kid.... sorry... can't help ya there!

But the breasts in a swimsuit thing.... easy.

My best friend is a 50-year old grandmother of two... she has DD's. Fantastic, but DROOPY boobs. The BEST swimsuit she has found for *that* problem is a halter top tankini with extra support. The two best places to buy them are LLBean & Land's End. It made her boobs look more like boobs, & less like fat knee caps.

Good luck~!! - and try not to let the 8-yr old kid's comment get ya down. YOU HAVE DONE A SUPERB JOB LOSING WEIGHT! - and maybe someday that kid will learn some tact, eh?

:o :lol:

SoulBliss, add your Gandhi quotation to the inspiring quotations thread!

Jay

If you're 5'7" and a 140lbs I honestly don't see how that 8 year old could think you're pregnant. It doesn't make sense unless that kid's mom is a toothpick and 2 months pregnant.
The boob thing I totally understand. I'm currently a E cup and have always had large breasts. I had to start wearing a bra when I was in the 4th grade. I breast fed 3 children so my breast sag more than they should at my age which totally sucks. I plan on having them lifted when I loose a lot of weight. I heard though that they can put the implant under your muscle which gives them a more natural look. I basically don't need size, I just need to be re-inflated.;)

Beach Patrol, THANK YOU for the laugh, I needed that this morning. Bathing suits are actually OK, as are regular clothes - they're not that bad YET, droopy for a 19 year old but not fat knee caps (again, yet... maybe I won't breastfeed...)

I think it was just a posture thing, and I'm going to stop stressing about it.

Browneyedgirl, I had to start wearing a bra in 4th grade too!! The lift thing isn't really an option yet, because I would have to make the decision NOW not to breastfeed ever, and that's not something I'm ready to do. Reinflated is right though, I so don't want implants but I want normal boobs back, and small implants would be a lot less noticable that large lift scars... The trials and tribulations of womanhood :-P

Mastopexy (breast lift) can be done so that the nipple/milk ducts are not severed, and you can still breastfeed. Of course, you'll still droop after said breastfeeding, so the "lift" part is pretty much negated, but you'll have nice and perky boobs til then, right? Or at least, that's how my surgeon explained it to me. (Breastfeeding wasn't an issue, but he explained it to me anyway.)

I don't know much about this, so someone please enlighten me. Don't your breasts produce milk whether you breastfeed or not, if you give birth?

My next question is, why would a mother deprive her baby of breast milk, which is the best food there is for babies, just to have perky boobs? Who/what are breasts FOR? I would think they would be for feeding babies first, and for attracting men second... Am I old fashioned or what? ;)

Jay

Yes Jay, they do produce whether you breast feed or not, but it is the act of breast feeding that usually causes the droopiness. I was really looking forward to breast feeding when I have kids, but I am on medication now that I have to be on and can not breast feed on. So, when I have kids I will have to bind them down in order to stop production.

Breast feeding can actually be very painful, which is why some women don't do it. For other women, it just doesn't feel natural or they may go back to work and don't want to have to pump and things like that.

For me, I will breastfeed if the kid lets me - My mom tried but I wouldn't take anything but a bottle (total opposite of my brother). That's why I wouldn't get a lift until after I've had kids, because even if I were still able to, it would be a waste of money. But it also depends on where I am in my life and career - for instance if my husband were the primary caretaker, it wouldn't make sense for me to pump endlessly. Or a thousand other scenarios. So yeah, I'm taking it into consideration but I don't think that I MUST breastfeed or be a bad mother - watch, after all this I'll end up single, or infertile, or adopting, or with a kid who won't breastfeed. Eh...

lol..that's funny.
I breastfed all 3 of my children and believe me it's not easy. In the beginning it hurts like you wouldn't believe even if you are a seasoned pro. Some babies just can't latch on properly. It takes a lot of work and perseverance. My youngest is 2 1/2. I consider my breastfeeding days over. I started having children while I was young and I am ending while I am young.