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TheManekiNeko 06-06-2012 12:41 AM

Going veggie...
Well technically I've been veggie whilst living at uni but I can't really do this at home because my dad is super opposed to vegetarianism and it would just cause unnecessary friction between us. and we already don't get on that well.

Seeing as when I am home for the holidays he always cooks the evening meal, I don't see anyway around this and have already had to break my vegetarianism. I need some sort of guidance/help.

Or should I just continue being veggie only when I'm not at home seeing as I don't spend much time at home these days anyway?

sheramama 06-06-2012 12:53 AM

I've been a vegetarian since I was 15 so half my life now. My family was super opposed to it forever, mostly bc they thought it was some insane phase. Once they found out that it was sticking around, they stopped. They do still tease me, but it's now in good fun.

Lay it down for him. Tell him the reason and that it in no way effects him. I don't know if you incorporate seafood or dairy, but that can be a connector for you. You can still make some awesome salads and dishes that he can learn to like on the side with his meat.

My dad finally sucked it up and tried some of my food. He ended up loving veggie chili and bean burgers. Who would have thought. Good luck to you and don't give up if you really want to keep this change.

TheManekiNeko 06-06-2012 01:45 AM

My Dad is really into cooking and hates it if I try to interfere with what he's doing.

I am not including fish but I am still eating dairy products and eggs. Though my main issue is that I hate cheese. It's good in some ways because I don't suffer from replacing all meat with cheese like some veggies so gaining weight, but makes it more difficult for my Dad again.

I tried to go veggie when I was about 13 but my parents told me no because I apparently like meat too much :/

Munchy 06-06-2012 11:59 AM

What would happen if you chose to ate everything but the meat portion of your meal or if you decided to buy/cook for yourself once in a while? Would he really be that angry or just annoyed?

It's not like you're asking for special treatment or more work from him.

TheManekiNeko 06-06-2012 02:53 PM

for him it is more the principle I think. He will just see it as me trying to be difficult.

It's a family rule ever since I was little that you have to eat everything on your plate. Even now if I say I'm full I get a look.

I just can't see a way that I can make it work. I might just have to do half and half. Which sucks, can't be a real veggie :(

Thanks for your suggestions.

Munchy 06-06-2012 04:56 PM

I wonder if you just plated your own food the way you wanted it, and he got angry, and you still didn't react negatively or positively to his reactions, would he keep getting angry?

My ex husband used to get so angry about things, but when I stopped reacting, he stopped getting emotional about it. He may have been mad, but no harm, no foul.

You can ask your father to respect your decision to be a vegetarian and reiterate that it's not costing him more, you're not asking for special foods, and that you feel better eating this way.


LiannaKole 06-08-2012 02:46 AM

I'll never understand why people are so controlling with others' food. I get lots of determined food pushers at holidays with family, and weird looks for what I eat and don't eat.

I've been trying a pretty much completely plant-based diet for a while (I'm okay with "may have trace amounts of milk/eggs/etc.). I haven't told anyone. No one has noticed yet.

If you can manage it, you might try this (this is what I do at holidays). Load up your plate with whatever you'll actually eat, and then add the stuff you're expected to eat but won't. Eat what you want and chuck the rest. I know it's wasteful, but I prefer that to having people follow me around trying to feed me meat lasagna. It's for their benefit, so if they don't know I didn't eat it, they won't lose any sleep over it.

I've never had anyone notice I didn't finish my food. But if your family is very vigilant, it may not work.

Or, a more extreme thing I used to do with my father (he was also very controlling with food - I had to eat whatever he made or he'd get mad and wouldn't hear a word against it). The napkin tuck. Whenever the others look away or go get a drink or are distracted, tuck what you can into napkins, empty cups, etc. I ditched many a food item that way. Just don't get caught - if your dad's like mine, he'll pitch a huge fit.

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