Hey everybody,

The other day my boss, a co-worker and I were making small talk on the way out. My co-worker asked after my son and she commented on how big he'd gotten. Of course she meant 'big' as in TALL, but before I could respond, my boss jumps in. He starts this mini diatribe (as though he'd been wanting to say this to me for a LONG time) on how sad it would be for my son to ever be as big as me. His tone was almost 'jokey'. I was speechless, as was my co-worker. Now I'm mad at myself because I didn't say anything at the time, which allows this man to believe he has the right to talk to people like that...I kind of quickly changed the subject and it was forgotten.

I hate that some people can't see that I'm more than just an obese woman. It's taken a long time for even me to consider myself as human and everytime I make some little step towards change, someone like him comes along and tries to mess it all up. I mean, I have my bad days and I know that I'm not going to lose over 200lbs in a day or a week - maybe even a year. I hate that I've lost 14lbs and for a second, he made it feel like I've achieved nothing.

I think it's unfair that even when we start making a change, these saboteurs will never leave us alone until we're a size 10/12/whatever society deems as 'normal' this season. I've worked at this place for almost 3 years. I've known this guy for 2. I always ask after his wife and kids and I'm always polite - to everyone I meet. But this guy saw no problem whatsoever with talking down to me...because of 200lbs? AAARRRGGGGHHH!!!!

Thankfully, I do not feel like bingeing (anymore). I feel like filling the inside of his pants with LOTS of itching powder.

It is more than unfair... it is totally in appropriate for your BOSS to be making these kinds of personal comments. The guy was totally rude.

Try to let it roll right on off and not let it get you down! Just keep making your progress!

Amy you're doing great. Even if you do have 200lbs to lose, so what, you CAN do it, he however will always be a mean



Another thing which my DF says, you only have to put up with him being a DH for small parts of the day, think of the people who have to put up with him most of the time (like his wife and kids)

Well hopefully your son won't grow up to be as rude as that charmer!

Next time he says something along those lines. Smile pleasantly and say "Have you finished your piece?" "Oh good" and then change the subject and speak to someone else!

Any betting he picks holes in his wife too - maybe not the weight thing but I bet he gets a mouthful at home!!!

I guess they think if we have a thicker skin covering we don't feel any pain??

Oh I HATE people like that! I expect he's got an opinion on everything and assumes that he's always right. Grrrrr!!!!!

Don't let it get to you - he's a thoughtless, arrogant idiot and always will be.

I can't help but wonder if he would make a similar rude and pointless comment to a disabled person or someone who is a different colour or race from him.

Peacock 2's too polite for me, I don't suffer those types of idiots at all. I'd point out that those type of comments are considered incorrect nowadays and if he doesn't like it then discuss the situation with your Human Resources Dept.

oooo what a BLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP...

well done !.. your doing great !... have u felt how heavy 14lb is?? get a bag n fill it waith random stuff... until its 14lb... its a lot!...


keep going... you CAN do it !

. Someone like that isn't worth worrying about. You, your family and your friends know that you are more than an obese woman, and anyone that speaks to you like that is not someone you need to listen to. Congratulations on the 14lb so far (and for not bingeing), and keep it up

Yeah I was being polite for once, Sarah Ann, but by saying something nicely - he looks bad. It woud be too easy to say something nasty back - then he would not feel so bad - he would be like "Oh well she is a b*tch anyway".

I used to always come back with a ripe retort but, especially at work, you have to be careful - even if you are the wronged one. I find it better and oddly more satsfying to behave 'nicely' - with an (admittedly)fixed smile on my face, then they canot say I am 'emotional' aggressive or whatever!!' Of course it is also known as being clever, sly, cunning - but what the ****??!!

That was totally inappropriate! And coming from a supervisor?? He should have known better. I'm glad to hear his stupid comment didn't contribute to a binge. He's not worth worrying about.

ARGH! That makes me so annoyed. You should complain and talk about what an @rse he is loudly to everyone. He just shouldn't be allowed to say such stuff it's bad enough when you get it from a stranger but someone you work with it's just not on.

Dear Amy

What can I saw apart from what a wanker.

Hang in there and chip away at your weight as we all are.

Take care

Michele

New here, not UK, but I just had to say:

HOORAY for YOU that this MORON didn't cost you a binge--you were magnificent!!!!

And to lose 14 pounds is fabulous--it shows YOU have more discipline in working your lifestyle change than he does in keeping his mouth shut!

You won that round, my friend!

Diana

You want me to hold him down for you?! I'd be HAPPY too!!

Don't feed into other people's negativity! Sounds like he is a miserably unhappy person and the only way he can make himself feel better is to belittle others. You are way more than that! Hold your head up and be proud to be who you are and the weight you have lost!

You know what??
Dont settle for it...
Get him back..!!
Dont grin and bear it, he pissed you off... You wont feel better untill you've done something about it...
Even if its something silly and small... Order him some incontinence pad samples.. or some bald mans hair growing remedy... pick out something he might b insecure about and milk it! BUT be very carefull you dont get caught.
And from now on... stick up for yourself cos noboy else will... who cares if people think you're a *****? Although you'd have to do a lot of bad things to get the reputation of a *****...
Your a strong person, you realised your overweight and you decided to do something about it... good on you.. and you lost a stone.. that rocks! But dont let people make you feel bad about yourself... stick your chin up in the air and repeat after me "I will not be spoken down to" "I love myself", and if you dont love yourself, then start... because those people who like the person that they are inside are the ones who are attractive on the outside... seriously... I see a lot of skinny pretty girls who radiate absolutely NOTHING... yet a size 24 woman can be the most beautiful woman in a room of hundreds if she likes herself.. I know its hard to feel good about yourself, but if you eat healthily, look after yourself and treat yourself you will feel better. Believe me, you will feel exactly the same as you do now, even if you lost all your excess weight, unless you start to like yourself.
I have done everything to be slim, I have taken tablets, fasted.. regularly stuck my fingers down my throat... but at the moment im concentrating on being healthy, getting to know myself and liking who i am, and i feel 100 million times better, now the fact that my stomach wobbles when i walk and my thighs overlap dont bother me as half as much as they used to...
I really hope you can feel the same...