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Old 09-28-2015, 04:19 PM   #1  
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Default New member close to tears!

Hi all
I'm new to this site but need someone to talk to. I have been overweight for as long as I remember but it never bothered me. I was always a 14-16 and happy. It suited me and I felt good about myself but over the the last few years it has slowly crept up and now my size 22 are very snug. I could cry and I know it's my own fault as its me that eats too much. I turned 30 this year and have a beautiful 18 month old daughter. I hate the way I look, I hate the fact I have no energy to run about with my baby girl but mostly I hate the fact that she may grow up to have the same issues as me. I don't want her to feel like this. I am embarrassed by the amount I eat and how little exercise I do. I eat regardless of whether I'm hungry. Tonight my husband went out and I ordered a Chinese and literally ate to the point where I felt physically sick. I'm not even getting enjoyment out of food anymore, I don't even know why I do it. Sorry for the long post but I just feel so down in the dumps. I now weigh 2 stone more than my husband and feel Repulsive x
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Old 09-29-2015, 10:25 AM   #2  
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I too, am a binge eater. I am not sure if my habit is healthy, however I have substituted my binge eating sessions not with food, but with Green Tea (and a sugar substitute). I end up drinking 5 - 6 cups of tea this way per day and I have been doing this for long (several years). So far it has not produced any adverse ill effects on me (touchwood). Since it takes 10 - 15 min to drink each cup of hot tea, by the time I'm done, my appetite is largely curbed. Besides, I eat wholesome breakfast (350 cal), a good lunch (500 Cal), 2 snacks (200 Cal), and a light dinner (250 Cal).

Also exercise will curb the appetite and many people don't feel hungry for a while after workout. You can, for the starter, try working out 2 half-hr sessions per day and do some simple activity to begin with like walking/swimming, etc.

I wish you good luck with your weight loss journey!

Cheers,

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Old 09-29-2015, 10:27 AM   #3  
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Welcome! Look at it this way, you have decided to make some changes, they don't have to be drastic, just start slow and the rest will follow. Also know that making a little one for 9 months does not mean the weight came on all at once, nor will it fall off all at once (unless you are famous, for some reason they are always slender post-pregnancy - don't use this as your guide, you'll just feel worse BTDT). Make one change to your day, walk a block or two, drink more water. You may find you like how you feel after such and soon enough you will be chasing your little one. It's hard when you realize how you feel in your own body and what you have been putting into it. I guess for me just tracking what I consumed in a day not dieting, but tracking my meals proved a huge eye opener for me. I know I am heavy, but I didn't realize I was feeding myself so much and the calories added up quickly.

Good luck on your journey - I have found this site to be helpful and encouraging on my short trek thus far. You can do this too!
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Old 09-29-2015, 04:46 PM   #4  
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Hi Tetty

Sorry you are not feeling great about yourself at the moment but that is something you can easily change and this is a great resource to help you. So you have put on weight but you have also created a life and crucially you want the best for your child. This means becoming the healthiest and happiest person you can and who will be able to run around with your child (set whatever date you see possible for this).
Start with small changes like setting a goal to walk a fast 5k within the next month and giving up one bad food habit. Maybe make a decision to only have a take-away once a month. I do this with my OH and it's a bit of an occasion for both of us. Its also a forever lifestyle change that is doable and can be maintained.
I started the year as a delusional size 18 (was more like 20) but now wear a size 12 and my physical health is so much better. However it is the improvement in my mental health that I appreciate the most. I am happier, calmer, less anxious & less moody. Because I now know I am able to take control and deal with problems and challenges.

All I did was make a start.
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Old 09-30-2015, 07:54 AM   #5  
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I'm sorry you are feeling low right now. Like you, I was always a "big girl" and was size 14/16 when I was first married. Five children later, my weight crept up and up over the years, almost without me recognising it. Losing weight seems insurmountable at the beginning, but it all starts with a small step forward. Decide how you want to proceed - is exercise a priority for you? Endorphins, better fitness, etc - all can be done at a higher weight. The better you feel physically, the more motivated you will feel in other areas of life. Add a few more servings of fruit/veg in your day, perhaps. Harder to binge eat on those.
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Old 10-01-2015, 07:44 AM   #6  
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Sorry to hear about how sad you are feeling about your weight and how it has made you feel.

You actually remind me of myself. Going back to the beginning of 2012 when I had just turned 30 I was a size 22 (like you) and tipped the scales at 16st5. I was a real misery guts and hated to go out and hated the way I looked.

I also was planning a holiday to Disney World just wanted another baby (I already had a son) and ate too much and didn't eat enough healthy food. I even found out a couple of months later that I had ovarian cancer and my size was the reason it was not noticed sooner. An ovary out and some radiotherapy later, I was given the clear. But it made me realise I didn't want this anymore so I followed an improved healthy lifestyle.

Now I am getting ready to go to target for my mums 60th on halloween, this is also going to be the first time a lot of people have seen me and would remember me as being obese.

I am now a size 12/14 and just need to tone up and I also got my wish and my daughter was born last year.

So you can do something about it, you just have to want to and appreciate that it takes time.

Start by using hypnosis (very good for stopping binge eating) and then look at cutting out processed foods and then look at having more of certain foods in your diet such as chicken and fish. Oh and lots of vegetables.

do try hypnosis first though as it works very well for people like you and I still use it now.
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Old 10-09-2015, 05:05 AM   #7  
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Oh my lovely, you are absolutely not alone!
I have 2 daughters, the eldest will be 4 in January and the youngest is turning 1 on Wednesday.
I've always been larger, at 16 I was 16 stone and a size 18.
In 2013 I got down from 18 stone to just under 15 stone and I could fit into a size 16 for the first time in my life. I then met my partner and after our daughter was born I was back up to 17 stone. Over the past year I turned into a food monster and after weighing myself last week I have decided enough is enough as I'm now nearly 19 stone and a size 22 bottom, 20-22 top.
I know how you feel with no longer getting enjoyment out of food, I no longer enjoy chocolate or junk food but I eat it for the sake of it.
I'm having one last 'blow out' tomorrow as I'm going to a rock club and will most likely get very drunk and eat grease.
I lost weight before by cutting out all crap, processed food and by restricting my carb and sugar intake. Lean meat, veg and protein will be your best friends.
I am starting Sunday and to be honest my mindset is now 'bring it on!' rather than just shrugging it off.
You can do it, you've hit that point where you want to do it and only you can get in your way. Go for it, we're all in the same boat so you have a mass of support xx

Last edited by brainybunny; 10-09-2015 at 05:07 AM.
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Old 10-10-2015, 11:24 AM   #8  
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I, too, turned 30 this year and there's something about life mile stones, say age, marriage, having kids etc, that drive home issues that we have.

I'm 18st5, down from 18st9 3 weeks ago, and before then I was crying, my back hurt when I walked and I felt lost. I still, honestly, feel a little lost. There is one thing that have changed, mind you, and that's my mindset! I have over eaten twice this past week and it has done nothing for me; I only feel guilty after.

After reading your post it seems to me that you've reached a 'crisis point' of wanting to change! The tears, in time, will give way to positive actions! I hope that in a few weeks you'll be able to tell us all about the good changes that you've made and how you've lost a little weight.

Early days are the hardest! As another poster said the weight seems impossible. It isn't, though, just hard.

Everyone here seems very supportive and I hope that you find a healthy way to live that suits you.

As I once read "I'm not telling you it's going to be easy, I'm tell you it's going to be worth it."
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Old 12-27-2015, 06:05 PM   #9  
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Default Tetty

Hi sweetie, I just read your post. Don't worry about your daughter obesity is only inherited by our mothers cooking not through DNA . As long as you feed her good healthy food she will not grow up overweight.

Don't worry too much about exercise, as exercise makes you fit not thin. It does have benefits that allow you to eat more, but truthfully when we are overweight we have to change our eating pattern and choice of foods to lose a drastic amount of weight.

Do you find your appetite increases when you are bored and that's why you ordered the Chinese?

How is the relationship with your husband? Do you possibly feel unloved and are comfort eating perhaps.

How about getting a dog this will keep you busy at night as you will have to walk it and maybe make a point of also walking the dog every evening at 8pm to stop snacking, the dog will not only help you burn calories and keep you busy to avoid snacking but will also give you lots of love too and introduce you to new friends through the world of dog walking.

I got a border collie he is a tough fitness coach, but his enthusiasm is mind blowing I have lost more weight with him than any fancy gym membership and find everyone says hello to me. To keep my energy levels I eat far more sensibly now. I order junk food once a week and dine in restaurants once a week, I drink at weekends only and avoid eating after 8pm sun-Thursday.

Chin up
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Old 01-04-2016, 07:36 AM   #10  
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No advice my lovely, just know you are not alone. Today is my day 1 (again). Sending hugs to you.
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Old 01-16-2016, 07:40 AM   #11  
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Closing this thread as Poster has not been back online since posting this. I hope she finds a path.
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