Hi again, Not only have I been busy, but my computer was out of action. Ray was 'fixing' it and he fixed it good and proper - thank goodness he managed to unfix it last night.
I am feeling much better, no sore throat or anything. Although one of my teeth snapped yesterday, for no reason. It must just have been ready to come out, but I am too young to be losing my teeth. So guess who has to go to the emergency dentist when they open up again on Tuesday. Will cost me an arm and a leg and is not very attractive at all - but there is no big pain, just a bit uncomfortable - hopefully the dentist can sort something out.
Is a bank holiday tomorrow, we have no plans. Ray is working 12 hour shifts again so he'll be away from dawn to dusk - at least I get to spend his wages
and it stops him fiddling with the puter.
Have had a busy week, I have decided to declutter. I was wandering around the town on Monday with a couple of friends and kept seeing all these lovely clothes but didn't want to buy any as I had no idea of what I really had in my wardrobe. So I came home and just started. Then I went to weight watchers and their may booklet was all about clearing out the rubbish - big coincidence. Have cleared all the big clothes out of my wardrobe, all the size 22's have gone - still have sone size 20 tops, but only a few and they still fit. Have ditched all the size 20 trousers and I was so proud of them in January when I brought them. Only have one pair of size 18's so will need to force myself to go shopping this week, need another pair at least for work.
I wore my favourite red shirt to work on Wednesday, it was a size 22 and I thought it still looked good as it was fitted and looked hideous when I was a size 22. Had on my smallest pair of size 20 trousers to. When I left the house I felt well cool, by lunchtime I felt fat and frumpy - funny that. So the favourite shirt and large trousers have gone!!
Took a big bag down to the charity shop yesterday and had a rake around. The boys told the whole shop that I was looking for size 18 shirts for work. 6 months ago I would have been motified that anybody knew what size I wore, now I want to shout it from the tree tops, goodness only knows how I'll fell when I get to a 16. Notice the when and not an if - I am so determined. It took me 4 months to go from a 20 to an 18, so I am aiming to be into a 16 come October - only I can make it happen. And I will.
A friend yesterday asked what is motivating me - as she has lost her motivation. There isn't one specific thing that is. I purely want to be healthier and weigh less. I want to wear nicer clothes and be able to do more things. Wasn't much help to my friend. She is being motivated this week as her WW class have a journal and if someone is having a bad week or has lost their motivation they have to take this book home and log their eating in it that week. Linda has it this week adn it is motivating her as she will need to stand up in front of the class and explain what she ate, her exercise and her loss. She's not sure it will motivate her next week. Have suggested that she can stand up in front of me and another friend and tell us all that - she just laughed. Will just need to keep phoning her and texting to keep her on the straight and narrow. Have told her about us, but she works long shifts and is busy studying for college, it could well be she just has too much on her plate at the moment.
I hate it though when she starts talking about being bad or having a bad week. It's our decision, we make the choices and only ourselves are really responsible for what we eat and what we don't. Personally I don't have bad weeks, too negative for me. I have ones where I don't stick to plan, where my eating goes to pot, anything but bad. In fact I think when I have a glitch and eat chocolate or cheese or drink to much wine or more cheese or have a large pizza or whatever - I think it's a good thing and I fair enjoy it and get back to plan and feel even more determined after it - whether that be the next day, week or whatever. Just calling it 'bad' makes me feel down, off plan sounds more dignified - at least the plan is still there and I'm thinking about it a little.
Another friend has explained a bit about TOM to her daughter as 'womans problems'. Personally if I had a daughter the word "problem" wouldn't come into any conversation regarding TOM. Probably just as well I have two lads.
Language is an intriguing subject once you start thinking about and how we say things and what we really mean. Getting too deep here.
Guess it's all to do with our frame of minds and my is in determind and positive mode at the moment - long may it stay there.
The weather in Scotland has broken, we have had rain for most of last week and the wind has got back up. Well it is April, this is more what we are used to. Not good for my walking though. What with all the rain and Ray working the longer shifts my walking has dropped. I am trying to replace it with aerobics, but I long to be outside. If Steve had a bike which fitted him we could be away out on the bikes in the rain - the boys don't care if they get wet and I'm trying to pick up some of their zest for life - am hoping it will rub off.
Have typed away for Scotland here. Only popped in quickly as I took a rest from the ironing. It is my new hobby - ironing.
I have an enormous pile, so for the last few nights I've been ironing my usual 10 things. But them yesterday I got 3 loads of washing dry outside and didn't fold it last night - needless to say most of it needs ironing, so I forced myself to do it earlier - am looking at it as exercise and a good reason to drink lots of water.
Am back for good this time. Guess you're stuck with me
i'm busy planting seeds and messing around in the 'forest' 
The blackbird has nested in next-doors hedge this year and had two babes, but one of their rotten (sorry to all cat lovers reading this) cats got one of them. Yes I do like cats but would prefer them to stop stalking and catching baby fledgelings... 
so we'll forgive you 
i hope she had a brilliant time 
Carol..are you making up for lost time? 
i want it to stop so i can get outside doing stuff again 
