It was my oldtimer's disease - I forgot about that book. It's called the Mermaid Chair and Costco is supposed to have it after April 5th.

TPBM would never sleep w/ a four legged animal. Only the 2 legged variety.

False/true. Not with a four-legged goat but a two-legged old goat so what's the difference?

My friend's bookstore ordered it for me and I have it on my desk. So there. Pbbbbbt

As you all know if you have teenager hipsters, gmail is the new have-to-have-it email program thingie and now that I'm using it I think it's very very nice. You can only get it by invite so if anyone wants it, lemme know.

You can find your email at any puter like yahoo but it holds WAYY lots of mail. You can search your mail. It's easy to use and google keeps on improving it. Today they added rich text. Yippee yay.

TPBM has chocolate bunnies still.

True. Absolutely.

Gmail has no ads but it is a google product so next to your email is sometimes some paid ads that relate to your email. I enjoy that. For example, I once wrote to someone about an ex bf and one of the ads said "I used to miss him but now I've improved my aim."

I remember that story Kiwi. Cruel. My kitties have never been buried in snow but one used to get on Herbie's roof a lot.

TPBM is exactly 5'6"

I wish I were 5'6". I stopped growing at 5'2" by the 6th grade. 5 foot 2, eyes of blue.

Kiwi, your weather is even worse than mine, so I'll shut up. It's so ccccc-cold way up thar in Maine. My zip is 97045.

I'm off for the weekend, lovelies - I'll eat extra in your honor at bunco. See yas monday.

TPBM has more exciting plans than bunco this weekend.

WELLLLLLLL---i have no "exciting plans" but i am taking a jewellery making course with dd on saturday and sunday----i know the girl teaching the course cause we were at the same trade show for ten years when i used to sell my jewellery! her website is http://www.bejewel.ca if you want to see her stuff.She is tres cool.Dd sells alot of stuff at the shop so we want to get some "trade secrets"====the stepdd's have been here all week so we took an overnight trip and went to an indoor place that has rides---i hate "rides" so there happened to be a great bookstore attached to the place and i enjoyed a couple of hours there!!! i am reading for my bookclub a book called "right as rain" ====it takes place in the south when they still had slaves---so far i like it------------kiwieeeeeeeeeee====your ole man must be improving by now!!! you need a break!!!!! we have NNNO snow but the place we visited had snow so i guess we are just lucky ---except it has been COLD and WINDY!!!!!!!!!!!!_--wabby,i would be sooooooo mad if someone stole my solar lights!!!! they are expensive and how TACKY is it to take such things----people are such ASSSSSSSSSSSSSSes!!!!!===== i am tired of the TBPM game ---- i like it better when we swear for a few pages---eff eff eff.and ****====oops---the pope is dying ---i had better be more pious.{??}PEACHERS!!! MOTHER IS DOWN IN FLARRRRIDER FOR A VACATION!!!! I THINK SHE IS NEAR ST PETERSBERG???? SOMEWHERE DOWN THERE---FOR THREE WEEKS!!! LUCKY GIRL--------- speaking of assssssssses----those dorks who took poor ds on a cultural holiday--------why do they even like going anywhere different??? don't get it. -----okay,gotta go to bed-------------LOVE YOUSSSSSSSSSSSSS =====EFF EFF EFF

I don't like to say EFF. I like the intellectual stimulation of learning what the person below would not tell on her own.

Bagzina, don't Americans come to Canada and get bugged over your funny way of talking and stuff? It's the same thing. Americans have no contact with other nations except the ones that slip over the border and come here and WE KNOW that they NEED TO LEARN EGNLISH and not expec UUUSUSSSS to speak their language which is just too strange and not as good as English. SAme thing. The Herbettes are in shock over the nerve of these Spaniards to speak Spanish and to eat food that does not include cheese grits and three kinds of sausage.

Enough.

I want to know that TPBM thinks but now I'm all intimidated.

what book club? WE HAVE OUR OWN BOOK CLUB now. Right? Huh?

False--I am not not intimidated, but haven't been thinking because of allergies or some other wonkiness of the sinuses.

Do WE have a book club? I loved Secret Life of Bees. Is there a read-by date?

I don't know if any of you got the following from another 3FC denizen. It might come in handy.


Why Women Lie

One day, while a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river, her thimble fell into the river. When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "Why are you crying?" The seamstress replied that her thimble had fallen into the water, and she needed the thimble to make her living. The Lord went down into the water and reappeared with a golden thimble. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked. The seamstress replied, "No." The Lord again went down and came up with a silver thimble. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked. Again, the seamstress replied, "No." The Lord went down again and came up with a wooden thimble. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked. The seamstress replied, "Yes." The Lord was pleased with the woman's honesty and gave her all three thimbles to keep, and the seamstress went home happy.

Some time later, the seamstress was walking with her husband along the riverbank, and her husband fell into the river. When she cried out, The Lord again appeared and asked her, "Why are you crying?" "Oh Lord, my husband has fallen into the water!" The Lord went down into the water and came up with Mel Gibson. "Is this your husband?" the Lord asked. "Yes," cried the seamstress. The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!"

The seamstress replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to Mel Gibson, you would have come up with Tom Cruise. T hen if I said 'no' to him, you would have come up with my husband. Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three! Lord, I am a poor woman and am not able to take care of all three husbands, so THAT'S why I said yes to Mel Gibson."

The moral of this story is: Whenever a woman lies, it is for a good and honorable reason, or for the benefit of others. That's our story, and we're sticking to it!

Bagzz-- I am SO sorry about snarky thief. In my typical pollyanna mode, though, you must have NEAT STUFF. I've gone in stores where I wouldn't want what they had if they dipped it in chocolate.

What a shame to get to Spain and then act like a Southerner. At least a Californian would groove with the scene, ya know?

TPBM has never told a lie. Or maybe that's never been caught in one.

Oooh! I wouldn't touch that one with a ten foot pole. Well, OK, I will touch it. False. And false. I've told many a lie and been caught in several. Bad, bad me. :devil:

So this is what I get after googling something I can't even remember and somehow ending up at one of those conspiracy sites: 1) The Pope will not die but will instead flee Rome and the Anti-Pope will be appointed. 2) Because of the mass media coverage of this thing, people will not be paying attention and criminals will do really, really bad things which means that WE ARE ALL DOOMED. Sheesh.

Spain has good sausages, but not the southern kind, and NO grits. Nowhere. I think next time ds will have to go with people who are not *sses. My ex sis- in-law was the kind of person who would travel to a foreign country and then stay in her hotel room and order room service the whole time.

Thanks for the hanging basket input. Looks to me like you're supposed to just put the dirt on and plunk the plants in on top. We don't have much sun where they'll hang so I guess I could go for begonias or impatiens or something. Did a TON of work in the garden today and still don't have a clue what I'm doing but it was fun.

Ooh, pretty, shiny jewelry, Bagzie. Do you make stuff similar to that? I don't think I'd have the patience. I just bought a really cute bracelet for my mum for her birthday. I should send you a picture.

Hey! Since March 21 I have done Leslie 5 times and will do another 3 miles tonight. Keep losing and gaining the same d*mn pound. Hmphh.

TPBM is bored out of her mind.

yesssssss---------send picture of bracelet shuga!!! want to see bracelet. miss peachez----you would like a nice long necklace----how long??? maybe my dd can make you one-----for your birthday of course----what colour beads do you like and will you flash the men of dogpatch if they throw you some nice shiny ones????

By doze is stubbed up again.
Blech.
And I dode eben want to eat.
I surely dode want to do anyding with Leslie, or walk or talk. Poor be.

The only conspiracy theory that makes sense to me is some metabolic one that keeps my hot sexy body under wraps.

I am not bored out of my mind. But I am about to bore all of you out of your minds, because it's Sunday and that's the day I type endlessly about nothing (or would that be Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday,....?).

Painty, you type funny when you're sick. :lol3: Hope you feel better tout de suite. :rofl: That's saying something.

Yes and no. He does a lot when I'm not around. Yesterday I was gone all day to Dd's jazz (band) festival. They did great, by the way, but the competition was impressive and they didn't place in the top 3. He walked up the driveway and got the mail while I was gone. I think that's the first time he's been out of the house. Today he cooked breakfast (at lunchtime) -- he came in the computer room (I've been here for hours :o ) to ask if I wanted eggs. He really looked like he was hurting, so I offered to cook the eggs, and he got all pissed off and went and cooked them himself. :dunno: Grumpy. When I'm around, he mostly lies on the couch. I am still being sympathetic, but it is wearing a little thin.

Bagz, I am loving that jewelry site! Do they really hand make those chains? It doesn't seem possible! Gorgeous stuff.

I can now come clean on something that happened last weekend, speaking of jewelry. When we went to DH's sister's for Easter dinner, I wore the beautiful drop earrings your dd made, Bagz, but I forgot to put "stoppers" on the wires, which I need to keep my hair from knocking them right out of my ears. So all day I was checking to make sure they were still there. The first thing I did when I got into the car before we left our house, was to lose one down the side of the seat in the car. Well, I retrieved that. Then after dinner I discovered I'd lost one again. I started looking all over poor SIL's house for them (holy cow, it was clean!), and everyone joined in the hunt (I'd be embarrassed, but this is the way my in-laws are, so I long ago gave up trying to keep them from doing stuff for me). We couldn't find the earring anywhere. :( Then later as I was assembling the inevitable containers of leftovers to take home (I had filled them right after dinner), I thought, well, I haven't actually looked in the containers! And lo and behold there was my earring, right in the lasagna. :lol: I was delighted and everybody got a good laugh out of it. On the way home, we stopped for gas and I got out to help DD with the pump. When we got home, you guessed it, my earring was gone again. Now I looked all over every inch of that car at least 3 times, my clothes, my purse, everything that had been in the car, all over the ground. And I know I had both earrings when I left SIL's, because I checked. So I actually drove back to the gas station and checked with them, looked all around the pumps and sifted through 2 piles of dirt they had swept up! Yuck! Anyway I didn't find it, and I was all sad.

Well, yesterday DH talked to his sister and she said a neighbor left my earring in her screen door the other day. I do not remember taking it off and throwing it out the window as we drove by, but at this point I'll believe anything. So I'm getting it back :cp: , and I promise never to wear it without one of these on it.

I have not done Leslie (that sounds bad, doesn't it?) for about 2 weeks :eek: -- I really can't do anything until DH goes back to work. He spends the entire day on the couch, and sometimes the night. The only other TV we have is in the kitchen. Yes, I could walk in the kitchen, but I feel foolish enough marching around the living room, I just can't. I could actually still snowshoe in the woods if it would stop raining for 5 minutes... You would think with all the rain we've had, that would all be melted. They have been forecasting flooding for days now, but it's not happening. Apparently there's so much snow in the woods and it's just cold enough to keep it from all melting at once.

I checked out your weather, Wab and it's almost the same as ours! Your high temps and are a little higher than ours and our low temps are a little lower, but rain rain rain.

I think everyone should give me their zip code so I can check on everyone's weather at the same time. Actually, I know where you live so I could do it myself. Yes, it's true, I know where you live. Be afraid. :mag:

If I don't post this now, it could be tomorrow before I do.

TPBM swears like a dockworker when she's alone.

Kiwi

when i am alone???? i do that with an audience if possible====did you see the MARGARITA EARRINGS ON THE SITE THAT YOU FEATURED KIWONK-----THEY ARE HI LARRY ASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

I swear like a juvenile dockworker... not very original, but frequent.
By doze iz still stuffy. I donoo ib I should hobe id runs or not.
by zip code is 75025.
I won dis at a seminar yesterday.

TPBM is not sure if a cigar is just a cigar

Cigars are bubble gum, right?

I am posting just to bump this thread up as I am not getting notices of new posts. DS is home and he had a great time. He and Herbie shared a room which was good, I think. Herbie's bubba got on DS's nerves big time so that wouldn't have worked. Herbie remained mellow and took DS out for dinner in a Spanish restaurant.

Anyway, now that daylight savings time is here (Canada too?) we will LIGHT and be HAPPIER and MORE PRODUCTIVE and CUTER and .... I'll be happy with cuter, I guess.

TPBM is jealous that I had lunch at a Turkish restaurant.

Olé!
 

True! Insanely jealous. How come there are ethnic restaurants in Dogpatch?? I ate at home. Can't remember what I had for lunch. Noodles with ketchup, I think. Steak and smashed potatoes for dinner. Thank goodness ds finally got to taste Spanish food.

I "did" Leslie (eew) again tonight. My goal now is three times a week for the rest of my life. PMS is making me balloon up into a waddling mass of crankiness.

Today I was at the supermarket at the crack of dawn to buy a sort of tiered plant stand thingie for our terrace. When I got home, I opened the package and was thrilled to find that there were 39 screws to screw in in order to assemble it. When I was finished, I had to unscrew them all again and do it over because I had done it wrong in the first place, of course, because I have no spatial ability whatsoever and the diagram only made me dizzy. But now it looks beeyuutiful and I will festoon it with pretty flowers.

Man, Kiwi, you are one patient nurse. When my dh has a cold he's just intolerable so I can't imagine what he'd be like if it was something serious like yours had. Hope he's up and running soon. Seems like men get hernias way more often that women, or am I wrong? Must be all that heavy lifting.

Must go to bed now because I swear I only slept about 3 hours last night. Ugh.

TPBM has insomnia big time.

I'm only jealous that you had lunch at a restaurant. I had a bowl of soup at my desk.

This hour change will be wonderful once I get used to it, but I'm sooooo tired today. It's possible that I'm tired because I worked in the yard all day Saturday and now I'm in pain all over. I'm moving like an old lady. youch.

DH caught a big salmon on Sunday!!! He's soooo happy and we ate yummy fish for Sunday dinner. He deserved it - he got up at 2:45 am on Sunday to fish.

Kiwi, you should be nominated for sainthood. Sick DH and days and days of rain. Argh.

Good that DS and Herbie had a good time together. You sound happy he's home. DS, not Herbie.

Hey Shuga, congrats on the Leslie walking. That is soooo good. I've got to get back to it.

My head feels all stuffed up like Painty's nose, but I don't have a cold. Hope you feel better, Painty.

Time for a nap.

I don't have insomnia. Today. Maybe I will tonight. Not likely. Usually I only have insomnia when I absolutely have to be up at a certain hour and will not be able to take a nap later. Like on Saturday. Couldn't sleep, got up at 6 am, drove and watched jazz bands and waited around interminably, drove, looked at puppies, shopped at I can't even bring myself to type it and bought a dress for $6, drove, watched more jazz bands, waited around, drove, shopped, drove. What a dopy day. That's the kind of day when I have insomnia, so I can be plenty exhausted all day long. Fun.

I am also jealous of the Turkish restaurant. Very jealous. I put together a sandwich with cheese, avocado and leftover bacon wrapped in a tortilla which turned out to be stale. It wasn't as good as it sounds. Even.

It's a little easier to be sympathetic with this, but it does go onnnnnnnnn and onnnnnnnnnn. I asked him tonight what he was going to do with the rest of this week, and he has to do some taxes for his niece and nephew and then he "though he'd try to get into town to do a little walking". Eh? How about some job interviews, please? A little progress on this so called new house we are supposed to build? No? Too tiring? Poor dear. Not.

So glad DS had a good time in Spain. Did he bring you anything?

And so glad DH caught a salmon. Love fresh salmon.

Congrats on the walking and the plant stand building!

I'm in the throes of trying to reserve hotel rooms for our college tour. I thought I had this great choice in NY that wasn't too expensive and would save us all taking a train in and out of the city for 2 days, but I logged back in to reserve the rooms and suddenly they had no vacancy! No fair! Now I have to start all over.

Later gators.

TPBM would not let her kid go to college in NYC unless he/she got a full scholarship. (I'm way too accomodating)

Kiwi

False. If I could afford it I would. But I can't. So true.

Ds brought me a frog made of clay or something. Cute. Not chocolate though.

This is what I think of boy(s) ... they do not consider their moms when making plans. Ever. DS, for example, has a teacher who postponed a test and offered several choices for times to take it. DS chose 7 a.m. I start work at 9 a.m. I must drive him. I must get up WAY early. He could have taken it during the day. I know he could.

Speaking of dses, has anyone seen the Academy Award winning Spanish film "all About my mother"? I really like foreign films but here is the story:

Normal single mom and normal teenage boy go to a play for his birthday. He asks .. for a birthday gift .. to learn who his dad is. She promises to tell him later. Moments later, he is hit by a car and killed. She goes to Barcelona to see this dad for some reason who is a tranvestite-whore-man-with-breasts. Another person fitting that description is her best friend in Barcelona. Best friend wants to quit the whore business and get mom to pose as one so they can go together to a nun who has make helping whores her mission in life. Although we have seen the dad in the film, he manages to impregnante the nun. The film has other characters and subplots but this was too much for me.

TPBM loves Janus Film Festivals in her younger days.

Don't really know what they are, but I definitely liked to go to whatever film festivals or foreign films were showing. The summer after I grad. from college, I was still job hunting and I went to 60 movies in 2 months. Most of them were free.

I think that film sounds completely nuts.

Gotta go pick up kid.

Neither boys or girls consider their parents when making decisions, unless you make them. You know, like by standing over them when they are on the phone demanding to know what plans they are making. They love that. :lol:

I have a stomach-ache.

TPBM never makes food her family hates.

Kiwi

i never make any food anymore so that won't work for me----except for the hamburger soup that we got from i think wabby from a weight watcher's site??? i really like that and make it at least twice a month=-------------------I AM SO TIRED---THAT EFFIN TIME CHANGE ALWAYS GETS ME-------------so glad ds is home peach---i hate it when they are away=----dd got a job next year at her dorm as an RA{residence assistant} it pays 4500 a year-----she has 7000 in renewable scholarships and her tuition and board is 11000 SSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOo thank god for THAT!!! she will work all summer to make spending money and she really wants to avoid debt for the entire degree {business} we really cannot afford to send six kids to university so this kid paying her own way is saving the day. naturally she has to keep her marks up so the scholarships remain intact=============i am tired of :dizzy: :dizzy: :dizzy: thinking about it but the other girls will all need help so we definitely will be shelling out for many years----dh says he feels bad that my dd is not getting "help" from us but i say good for her and it's not like we don't supply her with lots of petty cash----THESE KIDS HAVE TO LEARN HOW EXPENSIVE IT IS TO LIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!====BLAH BLAH BLAH-----NOW I NEED TO KNOW IF THE PERSON BELOW ME USES READING GLASSES AND IF SHE FINDS THEM AS ANNOYING AS I DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :?: :?: :dizzy: :dizzy: :cool:

False. Husband refuses any vegetables that "squeak." (Read any vegetables that are not cooked into submission.) Children are more pliable (but I cooked for them for years, maybe DH just needs a bit more time.

MD gave me Rx nasal spray and antibiotics. Still wheezing. Outdoor temperature went from 80 to 50 with two rounds of hail in between.

Husband wondered why I'm not making more money.
I'm fat.
I'm mad at myself for enjoying my "part time" work status. Too bad I'm not living in the 50's where I was expected to stay home and be "crafty" and we'd live on the bread winnings he had. Actually, I don't want to live back in the 50's... but this isn't a bed of roses.

I have many extreme thoughts going through my head (and I even took my anti-depressant).... about NEVER eating anything "good" again, never "wasting" my time painting or drawing or knitting. Just putting my nose to the grindstone and working and working. Ceaselessly. I could be Cinderella with a fat arse and a BAAAAAAAAAAD Attitude.

Nobody likes a whiner. So... I'll sign off.

I wonder if I were thin if I'd stop slipping into the Slough of Despair.

TPBM things their bad days are worse than mine.

True. Mine are worse and I am whinnier. I just whine to myself. My Butt is Fatte. My hair looks like horror-movie wig stuff. My life is not what I want it to me.

But look at Jane Fonda. This is something seriously wrong with this woman. I remember years ago when she married Ted Turner, she was on TV saying that at their ages people would assume they didn't have much of a sex life but people would be very surprised. That is so creepy to say and now she's telling of her three-in-the-marriage-bed adventures with Roger Vadim and various women, many of whom were prostitutes. ANDDDD in Time Magazine, she explains to the reporter that the entryway to her woman is a (some female anatamy, I forget) and the hallway is a WOMB. She has painted it pink.

Back to me. I am, of course, terribly normal and dull.

TPBM find the Cathy comic strip more interesting than me.

Definitely not true. I don't really like comic strips. There are so few actually funny ones.

We're sinking back into the doldrums, cows. Is it the extended gray weather?? or the extended gray life?

I've eaten and eaten and I'm up 8 pounds. I can't believe I've done this to myself again. The sad news is that I still needed to lose 20 pounds, so now I have 28 pounds to lose. And I know that isn't that much compared to what some ppl struggle with, but that d*mn 28 pounds is the same amount I've struggled with for so long that I really wonder if I want to be overweight. Why else would I keep sabotaging myself????

And by the way, I don't want to look at Jane Fonda. I find her self absorbed and silly.

Painty, I'm sure my husband has often wondered why I don't make more money. I'm in a permanent support role. I'm what makes it possible for him to go make the money. It's not good for my ego, but it has been safe, and I'm all about that. Also, I think the competitive gene was missing in me. I just have such a hard time relating working hard and $$$$. Especially since I know some ppl who have gravy jobs and they're the ones who make the big bucks. The free marketplace makes no sense.

Kiwi, how could anything w/ bacon, avocado and cheese be anything but delicious? I think those are possibly my favorite foods.

DH actually made the comment that I don't keep the house clean - it's a long story on how it came up - and I just about went ballistic. We were sitting at the kitchen counter - the one he piles up w/ magazines and keys and mail and stuff. None of the things on the counter were mine, all his and DS's. I live w/ 2 very messy men and 2 big hairy dogs. DS and DH both smoke in the house even though I've asked them a zillion times not to. The reason the house wasn't clean was because I'd spent the previous weekend working in the yard instead of my usual marathon cleaning and laundry washing weekend. I can't tell you how depressed and po'ed his comment made me, because I'm hard enough on myself about keeping up with the mess. I work 4 to 5 days a week, I cook dinner almost every night, I've been painting my bedroom and bathroom with no help from anyone!!!! for the last month, and I've had insomnia from worrying about business cash flow at this stressful time of year (tax time). I'm effin tired, d*mn it. There. How do you like my whining? Do I have Painty and Peaches beat?

TPBM is shaking her head.

False. I am nodding.

I don't have a dh but the men I have had ... hmmm , Herbie ... had all these ideas on how I could do everything better include make more money. Herbie had ideas on I should eat more (what he liked), exercise less (because he said I did it wrong!) and still get thin and non-flabby.

Then DS..... my house stays a mess but while he was gone, I cleaned up the d*MN*D LR all nice and straight and now it has piles of books on the FLOOR, jackets on furniture, etc.

Kiwi .. I need your help printing something. It just won't go. Email me and fix it.

TPBM can easily name five good things about men.

Here's 5 good things about men:

They are usually good at moving things, if you give them directions.
They don't notice details or where things are, so they probably won't eat your stash of junk food if you put it behind something.
They can usually be easily pleased by either feeding or sex.
They get paid more than women, so can be financially useful.
They are bigger than women, so you can hide behind them in case of gunfire.

Kiwi

Yes to Bagz eyeglass question - I hate reading glasses! I especially hate working on the puter w/ them, because I need them for reading my paperwork, but then I don't need them for the puter, and I always mess up and look thru them at the wrong time. I also hate them because they are always dirty because my unusually long eyelashes smudge them up. (I was batting my eyes when I said that).

I'll be back to tell you the 5 good things about men. I can't now because a couple of them just got back to the shop.

OK. They left again. Hmmmm. The 5 good things.....

1. They're good for getting up in the middle of the night to investigate if you hear a scary noise.
2. They're good to have around when the sump pump goes out in the basement and it floods.
3. They're useful if your septic system backs up and you need someone to deal w/ it.
4. It's nice to have one to call if your car has mechanical problems.
5. They're very nice for s*x.

I wear expensive real glasses with multi-range-lenses and they're great. At first I thought I wouldn't want to keep them on and since they cost $$$$ I put chains on them but the chains wore them out and they "temple pieces" (real term) kept coming off so now I wear them always until night when I get out the READING GLASSES and I'm happy with it.

I used to go to the dollar store and buy handfuls of reading glasses. I was fine with that too. Used to hang them in the neck of my shirt. Very redneck,eh?

Really? I thought it was jaunty. Shows you what a redneck I am.

By the way, nice cowbell.

This is what I'm mad about today ---- DH wants to hire a kid to help him prune our apple trees. This would be fine if it were January or February when you're supposed to prune the apple trees, but in April all my plants that are under the apple trees are already out of the ground and growing. Delicate things like hosta and bleeding heart. If he prunes now everything will be destroyed. He has no appreciation for my gardening. If it were up to him everything would be shrubs and barkdust. This is p*ssing me off even more than the housecleaning comment. I take back #5 on the list, because that won't be happening anytime soon.

I'm too mad to think of a TPBM.

TRUE TRUE TRUE. How did you know? :p
Wabbs-- you have a better whine than me. I don't make much. I know I "could/should/ought" to work more/harder. I just don't like to! Talk about spoiled. :( Poor hubby. It's MY stuff that gets strewn everywhere. Fortunately his primo girlfriend after his divorce was EVEN messier than me. Comparisons have their uses.
I've just spent practically the whole d*mned day straightening out bank accounts/Quicken and paying as many bills as I had money for. Which wasn't all of them. I planned to stay home and regain energy from sinus allergy treatment/antibiotics. I want a big dish of icecream... with or without avocado, bacon and whatever that 3rd thing was.
Kiwi-- Sorry your mom got MORE depressed after her weight loss. My mom sort of went anorexic the year she discovered I was sexually active (I'll spare you the Jane Fonda-esque details... :o ) and just started drinking more. (my Mom drank, not me.) It wasn't really a plus for her. I recommend y'all read The Fat Girls Guide to Life. That gal has the right attitude. 28#s, Wabbs? Why that's barely overweight let alone MORBIDLY OBESE, like me.
Oh dear, I'm working myself into a "state." I'm getting PO'd.
Baggz-- congrats on having enterprising daughter. I think RA's are good about assuming responsibility and being organized. I've got a friend here who turned it into "Student life administrator" or some such title and now works for the national office of a high-class Sorority...
Cowpeach, I have handfuls of $1.00 reading glasses too (my favorite pair now leaves the bridge of my nose green... I guess you do get what you pay for). AND I stick 'em in my blouse/sweater/cleavage when I'm not wearing 'em. Rather like the denial some people have about how a sweater tied around their derriere makes them look smaller, I think the glasses draw attention to one of my better features. um. Two of my better features. I prefer to think of it as practical rather than redneck.
I need a drink. Between here and the kitchen I'll decide whether it's gonna be water or Scotch.

TPBM had such a terrific day she's sorry she's associated with this group. :cry:

False!!! I could NEVER be sorry for associating with this group. Every single one of you are fabulous, cranky or not. Peachy - I LOVE your cow bell!

My day has only just started and I am typing away in my bathrobe thinking about showering because ds12 has a 2 hour orthodontist appointment at 10 a.m. to get his brand spankin' new braces on. He's freaking out, of course which isn't looking pretty combined with the 12-yr-old eye-rolling attitude.

Yesterday, along with a teacher and two other mother's I accompanied 23 third graders to the natural history museum where we were all loud and shoved and punched each other incessantly and made plaster casts of ammonite fossils. Tons o' fun.

Jane Fonda is free to have sex as often as she likes and with whomever(s) she likes, but she SHOULD NOT under any circumstances tell us about it because we do not need to know. I used to like her but now I think she's a silly twit. I think I saw pictures of her womb-like house somewhere. Ugh.

Wabby! I hear you on the absolutely no regard for tender new shoots department. And don't even get me started about complaints about the house being clean!! Arghhh! I'm *sure* that someone squished my white bleeding heart a couple of years ago because it never came back.(ooh,if you took this sentence out of context it could have an entirely different meaning, I suppose). And the poor hostas - getting the tips of their leaves broken right off. For shame! They stomp around all over the flowers playing soccer and mash everything into the ground with their giant feet and then afterwards they say they didn't know there was a plant growing there. How's your succulent creation going? I'd love to see a picture of that. I'm going to plant succulents in my strawberry pot this year.

Must go get beautiful now. If I can't be thin, then I can at least be gorgeous, right? Has anyone ever used one of those at home highlighting/streaking kits and not ended up looking like a zebra/Priscilla Presley?

TPBM thinks we should start regular "this is what I'm mad about today" posts.

I looove the idea of everyone posting "what I'm mad about today", but some days I'm not mad. Some days I'm all Pollyanna-ish. I do love to read a good rant, though, no matter what my mood.

Paintypants, I know that my measly 28 pounds is a ridiculous amount to whine over, but thats exactly whats ridiculous - it's only 28 flippin' pounds and I can't figure out why I don't just take it off, keep it off and quit wasting my time obsessing over it. Instead, I build it up into a big deal that I manage to make myself miserable over. Stupid. Makes me think I must really want to be miserable.

I've accepted the fact that DH is just going to have to prune those d*mn trees, so I'm rounding up 5 gallon buckets to upend over each and every plant and then I'm going to stand there all day and supervise. And it really doesn't matter if he can appreciate my garden - I do and I love working in it so that's what matters. I haven't even gotten started on the succulent project, Sugar. That will be after I get things weeded and mulched. Maybe by next October. Maybe.

TPBM really needs a compliment today.

False. I would not feel it was sincere today. My pants are tight and I'm eating eating eating. My workday starts at 9 a.m but I've been here since 7:10 a.m. because DS had to take a test at 7 a.m. Let me repeat AAAA MMMMM.

DS is not considerate like Bagzieettes are .

Wabby please post pictures of DH trying to prune the trees while you're obstructing him with buckets. That would cheer me up.

My pants are tight and I'm still eating.

I have a job interview Tuesday. Positive thoughts please.

Bye.

TPBM is afraid of EFFIN spiders.

Yes I have and what is that picture? A dead goat? Llama? Some kind of road kill.

That's it. I have nada else to day.

What I am really mad about is my tight britches.

I don't blame you. That's why I wear loose ones.

It's a natural snow sculpture.