Hi, new here, sort of. I am a stay-at-home mom of a 4 year old little girl and a son that will be 2 next month. It takes my breath away sometimes to realize how much time flies! I am having some problems with the kids, and was wondering if anyone could help? I put the kids to bed, and they don't go to sleep. Bedtime becomes a battle, and I don't know what to do. It's been this way everysince my 12 year old step-daughter came to visist at Christmas. She was here for a week and our schedules got completely messed up no matter how I tried to keep it normal. Now, I am lucky if I get the kids asleep before midnight, and I feel like everything is just out of control. I keep saying I am going to get up at 7 am and wake them up, but it never happens, I am just too darn tired. And we end up sleeping way too late. Any suggestions? I could sure use some help. Next month, I get a break! My h and I are each taking a night away in a hotel room (seperately). He and I are having problems, so the break from each other will be good too. But I feel guilty, because I have never looked so forward to something like this in a long time. I mean, a whole night with NO children and no H! Is that normal? To need the time to yourself so badly?

Redskirt, I see you're from West Texas, I'm here in East Texas. About 30 miles East of Dallas.
I'm so sorry you are having problems. It's hard to comment because we don't really know much about you. In that I mean, are you a disciplinarian? Do you spank? That kind of stuff.
But first let me tell you a bit about myself so you know who you are getting advice from. I'm Crystal, 27 yo sahm of 3; almost 4. Alisa 6, Ally 3, Andrew 2 and I'm due any day with #4. I homeschool my olest in the first grade and I've been married over 9 years. So you can take what you want from what I say.
Anyways, my 2 yo never, ever, ever fights me to take a nap but literally once in a blue moon. Yesterday he did. And I feel bad, because I know when he's really, really tired he'll sleep, but I knew he was ready and I needed him to because he was cranky and we school when he naps. So I laid him down and he'd get up, I'd go easy at first, putting him back in the bed and each time my voice would get more sturn. Finally after about the 5th time of him getting up I smacked his bottom really good with the belt twice and he did not get back up. He went right to sleep for an hour and a half or so.
Also, I live in this little bitty 2 bedroom house and all 3 kids share a room, so getting them to sleep at night is tough sometimes too. My oldest usually goes right to sleep no problems. My 3 yo doesn't, but she doesn't usually bother the others, she just lays in her bed and plays with her blankey and stares at the ceiling until she's out. Andrew doesn't usually give me problems but he won't go to sleep until they do.
I know nothing I've said may help you, but the bottom line is this...you MUST be the one in control. You make sure your kids know that YOU are the boss and the mama and you make them mind in whatever way possible.
The problems you're having with dh I very much hate to hear. The only times I've ever had those problems were during emotional breakdowns and come to find out I was pregnant every time. Yes, it's okay to want to be away from everyone. I feel like everyone deserves to have their own time I just hope one night is enough for you. Just always remember why you married him and that you two have this great family together.
I'll tell you, my oldest has this thing with family. She says every family has to have a mom, a dad, a sister and a baby. Otherwise, it's not a family. Not sure where she gets it from but I'm glad she does. Even when she goes outside to find bugs, she'll find the whole family. It's the cutest thing but that has made me realize even moreso how important my marriage is not only to me and dh and to God but even to my kids. So yes, you take your time but you use it to help yourself and your marriage. You should enclose yourself in your hotel room and drop to your knees and pray as hard as you can. I KNOW God will help those who come to him in fearful prayer.
I hope something I've said will help you. Please come back to visit us here so we can help you through these times. You are in my prayers.

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