I only have a moment but wanted to stop in to say hello. Things got really off today with more snow. I've definitely had enough. Renee - I am right there with you about the moods and winter blahs. I have just given in for January and just doing my best to coast along. I do want to mention that I had a friend who started bc pills again and she had bleeding in the month - after a dose adjustment it just took a couple of months for her body to 'get used to it' and then the bleeding stopped. Of course, talk to your doctor, but you may just need some time to adjust or a different pill. Be assertive with your doctor and get what you need. They have lots of patients, so you need to make sure you are number one to them while you are in their office. Good luck and keep us posted.

My mother went to her rehab center today. She seems to like it well enough. It is a good move all around. I am still planning on going down to see her on Saturday. I'm hoping bf is going to accompany me but he doesn't know for sure yet if his schedule will allow it. In general he has been supportive though and that has been nice.

I am trying to take care of myself - at least I'm doing no worse than I was 2 weeks ago. I may have stopped gaining weight (at 197 - under 200 - yea!) and I'm trying to get sleep but it never seems to be enough. Speaking of which, I need to get to bed so I'll be back tomorrow.

Good morning girls.

Renee – good to see you back. Sorry about the stress you’re having – both at work and with your hormones - but at least you’re not stress-eating! I don’t know much about hormones and birth control, but I totally agree with Ang about being assertive and get the answers you need from your doctor.

I find it’s easy to feel enthusiastic about school and work these days – there’s really few dull moments.
And what you’re taking about, Renee – wanting a change, but having no idea what kind of change you want; I lived like that for years while working. When I finally found out that I wanted to study psychology, it started with a course in work and organizational psychology I took on a whim. I just found it very interesting, and wanted to learn more psychology. And I wanted to work as a psychologist. But it took time and a lot of thinking before I eventually quit my job and went back to school – even if it’s the best decision I’ve ever made! :D
My suggestion is that you start looking around at areas you think you would like to work in; see if you can take some courses to find out more about it, see if you can alter your job to suit you better. If you think you want to do something completely different – like working with animals – maybe you can find some courses or look into learning more about how you can get such jobs? Talk to some people who have jobs you find interesting maybe.
I think it’s smart to figure out the direction before you leap too! ;)

Ang – very good to hear that you’re taking care of yourself and that your boyfriend takes care of you too.

I’m still figuring out how my eating works too. I’ve pretty much always known that I overeat when I’m bored and when I’m feeling bad about my self (it’s the whole blaming myself, thinking I’m bad, ugly and fat - thinking negative thoughts about myself - that makes me overeat). So I’ve thought of myself as an emotional overeater for years and years.
But I’m slowly seeing that I also overeat when I’m very hungry (I need to snack and eat enough throughout the workday), when I’m thirsty (I have to drink enough water throughout the day), when I’m sleepy (I have to get my 7 hours of sleep to function at my best and not spend the day after overeating), and when I’m tired (I have to take breaks throughout the day – and hey! I can combine breaks with snacks and water! :D).
So it’s not as easy as just being an emotional overeater – I also have to take care of the more basic needs to keep from overeating.

Wish you both a good Thursday!

mette - brief is fine as long as you can keep in touch. We'd miss you if you left. :) I'm so happy that you are enjoying your 'work'. I'm sure you will be a great psychologist.

Welcome back Renee. I hope work is busy in a good way and not too stressful. For a while now you seem to be struggling with where you are in life. Can you take some time to explore what would make you happy? If you are definitely young enough to make major changes in your life if that is what is required to make you happy. Of course you need to know where you are going before you start the journey. I believe that if you figure out where you want to go, the journey won't be so scary. It may not be easy but you'll have an end result to look forward too. Right now you are comparing known to unknown and of course that is scary. Do you want to change work only or work and other aspects of your life?

mette - after reading your post it really dawned on me how I have never analyzed my behavioral patterns. As soon as I can dedicate myself to the effort, I am going to take a week or two and record what I'm doing and see if I can pinpoint specific reasons why I overeat. Like you, I bet I eat for lots of reasons and don't even realize it.

My mother is happy at her new facility and took a few steps today with a walker. Except for the cancer she seems to be doing well. One day at a time for now for all of us.

Take care and enjoy your day.

Hey ladies. Well my eating was the pits today! Hahaha, but my god I enjoyed every mouthful. Burritos for breakfast, pizza for lunch, two giant oatmeal cookies (They were made of whole grain - that's allowed haha) and then steak and nachoes for dinner.

The good news is that I worked out for an hour! 5 minute warm up, 30 of weights, pushing myself into weights/reps that made the last few difficult. Then 20 minutes on the precor machine. :)

Feeling good, and I hope tomorrow I have that nice soreness there to remind me to 'HEY DON'T EAT LIKE A NAUGHTY GIRL!'

The doctor called back and told me to finish out this packet of pills, then come next month I will try a new brand. If that doesn't help, then we'll call her again and see what to do next.

Feeling pretty picked up today. Tomorrow I will have a better eating day, and I plan on going back to the gym on Saturday or Sunday. Maybe both? Do cardio one day, and just weights the next.

*hugs*

EDIT: Duh! Mette - do you use any kind of computer program to chart your lifting? I really want to set one up, but if there is one in existence somewhere, even better! Something that I can type in the name of the exercise/machine - the weight lifted - the reps and sets.

Hi guys! Just checking in again.

Ang – it’s nice to hear that your mother is happy. That must make life much better for you and your family? I hope you’re having a nice Friday – will you disappear for the weekend and go visit your family?
Still sending good thoughts your way, Ang. You seem to be coping very well with the situation.

Renee – you really like your burritos and pizzas, don’t you? ;) Thank god those cookies had grains in them, huh?
Anyway - I’m sure you burned it all off at the gym – your workout sounds great!
I use an Excel worksheet to chart my weight lifting – nothing more complicated than that. I basically just log the exercise, weight, reps, and sets – just like you said. Works perfectly fine for me. But let me know if you find something better! :p

I’m very happy the weekend is coming up, even if I have to spend it reading up on a paper I’m suppose to write. At least I don’t have to get up at 6.30 in the morning!
I also have to rearrange my workout regime for the next 16 weeks (while I’m in practice) – because I don’t have the time to go to the gym in the mornings anymore. :(
I'll work it out though - I'm not stopping or slacking now!

Ah well. Have nice Fridays everybody!

Renee - sorry to hear that yesterday was such a bad eating day for you. Has today been any better? Congrats on the gym though - you're getting to be a regular. :) Were you a little sore today?

mette - I'll be interested to hear about how you rearrange your schedule. It sounds like you are motivated enough now though to make time for working out and that is great. Do you like writing? It is the worst part of my job but a very big part of my job. What will your paper be about?

I hope you both enjoy the weekend. I am planning on visiting my mother tomorrow but should be back tomorrow night. I've been in a super odd place/mood this week and just want it to be over. I'm hoping for a fresh start next week. Therefore, I don't think I can deal with staying with family this weekend. If it weren't for my mother I would just spend the weekend on the couch watching movies. I guess doing that on Sunday will be enough. I'm not looking forward to the drive, but I think I need to see my mother tomorrow so I can move forward.

I'll be around here at some point. Take care.

Good morning girls!

Ang – I hope you enjoy your weekend as best you can too. Good luck visiting your mother today! And hopefully you can spend tomorrow on the couch watching movies!

I did go to the gym this morning – it looks as if I’ll be able to go on Monday and Saturday mornings for the next 16 weeks.
So I’ll just rearrange my gym-program into a 2-days-split instead of a 3-days-split. More like this:

Monday:
Squats (squat rack + barbell): 8 reps x 3 series
Lounges (with dumbbells): 10x3
Leg curls (machine): 8x3
Leg extensions (machine): 8x3
Shoulder press (dumbbells): 10x3
Lower back Hyperextensions (bench): 10x4
Side Raises (bench): 10x4
Sit-ups (3 sets)

Saturday:
Bench press (bench + barbell): 8x3
Lat pull downs (machine): 8x3
Pulley (machine): 10x3
Tricep extensions (barbell): 8x3
Biceps curls (dumbbells): 7x3
Upper back (machine): 8x3
Ab crunches (machine): 10x3

I’ll try it for a week and see how it works out.
Then I thought I would make a small program to do at home – perhaps Wednesday night – using my dumbbells.
Mainly chest, arms, back and abs I think – maybe something like this:
Push-ups (3 sets)
Sit-ups (3 sets)
Overhead triceps extensions (dumbbells) (8x3)
Side laterals (dumbbells) (8x3)
Front raise (dumbbells) (8x3)
I think I want to try a bit, and see how it feels. I do want to get push-ups into my program though: I suspect they’ll help on the bench press.

As for cardio – I walk to and from work Tuesday-Friday, so that’ll be 90 minutes 4 days of the week. I don’t think I’ll be doing more than that to start with.

And btw: I’m celebrating 6 months of consistent weightlifting 3 times a week next week or the next (I started in the beginning of August!). Yey! :D

Hi Ladies!

Long time no see, I know...! :sorry: I'm so glad to see that you girls are still around!!! I've thought about you all often, and now that the new year is here, I'm revamping my weight-loss plans and getting back on track. Hope you don't mind if I join in again. :)

I'm not really sure what happened, if I got burned out or busy or what, but I spent the last several months pigging out, not exercising, and generally being a sloth. The circumstances of the new year have helped me renew my efforts to lose weight and be healthy.On new year's eve, I got sick and developed bronchitis which had me home for a week. I realized that I was sick and tired of being sick and tired, and took this as an opportunity to better my life- so I haven't smoked since 1/1/05, and Mike quit too! :nono: :smoking: So we are now smoke free, going to the gym 3+ times a week, and eating better again. It feels very good. The year has been hard for several reasons so far, but I am so glad that I made the decision to quit smoking. And the best news is, I've lost two of the pounds I gained over the last few months- not gained (like everyone's so afraid of doing when they quit), but lost!!! :cp:

Anyway, that's a little synopsis of where I'm at right now. I'll be reading through everyones' posts to catch up with how you all have been. I can't wait to hear from all of you! :grouphug:


cw: 184

:cheer: Welcome back Jessica!!!! :cheer:

It’s great to have you back with us! Congratulations on quitting smoking *and* losing weight this year – you must be very proud of yourself! (and Mike!)
So – what’s happening at the gym? Are you lifting weights?
And how is work? Still as busy with your big project?
Looking forward to hear more about what’s been going on with you!

I’m doing OK. I had a long Christmas vacation which I enjoyed, and have recently started up with my 16-weeks-hospital-practice. Which translates into a lot less time on my hands, and quite a few new challenges when it comes to exercise and eating. I have to rearrange things a bit right now. How do you solve going to the gym these days? Do you go before or after work?

As for my weight – I’ve successfully maintained since August/September, and I’m starting to think about losing weight again this spring. It’s weird – I felt thin at this weight back in August, but now I just feel like my fat, ordinary self at exactly the same size. Which means that it took my head a few months to catch up with my body! :smug:

But anyway! Very glad to have you back Jessica!!!

Jessica yaaaaaaay! It's like a big happy reunion! So glad to see ya back and hear that you've made some great positive changes! Hope to see you around here more now.

Mette - The Excel spreadsheet, would you mind sending me a blank copy of how you set it up? I want to be able to format the columns and stuff to show the progress- and I am really Excel Illiterate. The one I made just lists the name of the exercise, followed by the weight used, and how many reps in each set. But there is no format to it, to follow the progress week byweek. If so, send it towards [email protected] :)

Ang- Glad to hear ya seem to be hanging in there. *hugs* Thoughts are with ya.

As for me, I am back to hovering the 157 mark! Gahdangit. I float mostly around 155, dip sometimes to 153, then hover back at 157. Yes my eating could be better, but I've also started exercising. I in fact, made it to the gym TWICE last week and ... big proud moment. The precor machines were filled, so I hopped on the elliptical and lasted my full 20 minutes! Last year, when I started the gym, I couldn't last three minutes on that thing.

I am sore all over today and feel good about the exercising, I am even, almost getting into it now. But... again, the weight thing is driving me batty. I am trying not to get down on myself, but the fact I am no longer losing is really stressing me.

On top of that, my cycle is just completely screwy. I've been spotting now, for eight days, in the middle of my cycle, while still religiously taking my pill at the same time every day. That too could be playing havoc on my weight fluctuation, and lack of loss. They are going to try me on a new pill at the beginning of next cycle... whenever that actually comes, who knows.

In other news, my fish had babies again. It's going to be a huge project to get everything transferred to the new tank - (upgraded from 10-20gallon) and I hope I don't kill them in the process.

Off to lunch. See you girls later.

Jessica - it's so good to have you back. Congratulations on quitting smoking. That is huge. It must help that Mike quit too. It sounds like you really have found a renewed vigor for being healthy and that is wonderful! Keep up the good work and I can't wait to hear more from you. You have been missed. :D

I am still on hiatus from being healthy. Life, darkness and cold weather happened and I stopped exercising. :( I have had some major adjusting to do with being in my new house over the winter. I have been making some progress on remodeling the house but it's slow. I finally got rid of old bf and now have a new one who is handy and helping me with some of the house stuff. I wish I could find a trigger to get healthy again like you did. Any other thoughts that you can share about what helped you turn things around?

My mother's cancer has spread and the doctors give her weeks to months. I went down to visit her this past weekend. All things considered I have a pretty good weekend. I am very glad that I went to see my mother. She is in good spirits and getting a little more mobile each day. I didn't stress about anything on Sunday, which was nice for a change.

mette - I'm glad your schedule will allow you to continue to work out in the mornings at least the two days a week. Your workouts seem very impressive. :)

Renee - I'm so proud of you for getting to the gym twice. What's change that gives you the motivation? I need to get in gear to 'catch up' with you ladies. :)

Congratulations on the the birth of the new fish! What kind of fish do you have?

Things at work have been very frustrating today. I'm trying to get a stats program to work and it's not behaving. I guess I'd better get back to it.

Good morning, girls! I can’t believe it’s February already!

Ang – it’s so good to hear that you had a good time with your mother. I thought about you a lot this weekend.

Renee – I sent you a copy of the format I use on my spreadsheet. Look at it and see whether you think something like that could work for you. The best thing is to modify it to fit your program/regime.
It’s pretty basic – and does what yours does: names the exercise, sets, reps, weight on a weekly basis. With weeks in the columns, exercises in the rows – well, anyway, you can hopefully see what it looks like by now! :D

And yeah weight. I’ve been thinking about when I’m supposed to start losing weight again – should I wait until summer? Spring? Start soon and get it over with?
I don’t know if that’s the reason, but I have strong cravings for peanut butter these days. I can eat it with everything! I can eat it right out of the glass! And it’s 100+ calories in one spoon *sigh*. I'm probably a little stressed...

Sorry about your weight, Renee – but at least you got lots of new fishes!!! :D

I’m off to do something useful. Lots of patients today. :p

Hi Everyone. In some ways I am so glad it is February because January wasn't any fun, but with work deadlines approaching so fast I wish I had a few more days. Also, I kind of gave up on January and now I feel like I can't give up on February - I need to do something.

How nice for you mette that you get to help people with your line of work. I thought I would be able to make a difference when I started in my field (at least indirectly), but I'm beginning to realize just how little difference my research makes. It is probably one of the main reasons why I am not liking my job as much as I thought I would.

Renee - have you been going to the gym in the evening?

mette - I love peanutbutter too. Do you eat the natural kind? How are you feeling about your weight and body image these days? Recently you mentioned that your thoughts about your body had changed since the summer, do you feel more comfortable with your body now?

I'll try to write more later but I have a meeting in a few and an abstract to write by the end of the day so I'm off for now.

I have a lot of sun here and I hope you all do too.

Hey ladies.

My gym routine is after work during the weekdays, and before lunch on the weekends when I go. I really like the atmosphere on Sundays, so much calmer.

The fish I have (which I just upgraded into a 20 gallon tank today) are Swordtails. They are a live bearing tropical fish and a lot of fun.

Eating today was MUCH better. Er, oops, forgot about those Burritos. Haha. Well, ok. That was breakfast, then bologna sandwich and an apple for lunch, and a clementine as my snack. Dinner is a shrimp thing that is real diet friendly.

I am glad it's February because it feels less like the middle of winter and more like I'm able to see the light at the end of the tunnel. :) I got my taxes back already, and spent them too. (I turned to spending during my sad January)

Mette I think you should start now. You've maintained successfully, and if your mind has shifted gears from the 'I did so great' to the 'I've not done enough' - then you might be able to use it as motivation. Could start slowly.

I am real sleepy right now, I think I'll get up and walk around heh. Alright, talk to you's later.

Hello ladies, I dreamt about you last night! :D
I dreamt we met in a strange house with doors everywhere, and I kept getting lost and couldn’t find the sofas where you were sitting. I tried to instruct myself to remember to tell you about the dream, this morning when I woke up (and it must have worked!). Heh...
I’m no Freudian – and I don’t interpret dreams much – but lots of doors and getting lost; I suppose it’s about feeling a little stressed out right now.

I do feel a bit lost at ‘work’ – and I hate the feeling of “I’m not really sure what I’m doing right now”. And while I do know this practice is about being a student, being new, being a trainee, being there to learn – it’s still stressful. A steep learning curve is interesting, good, challenging, etc – but it’s still stressful.
And yes – I’ll stop complaining now… ;)
I know it’s a good thing that I get to work with people – and it’s good to feel that what I do makes a difference. I totally understand what you’re talking about, Ang. It’s one of the main motivators for me too.
And sorry January sucked for you – here’s hoping February will be better!!! :hat:

I have to stop having peanut butter in the house (and yes, Ang: I prefer the natural, crunchy kind – do you?!). Are you able to have things like that in the cupboard and not eat it? It’s really one of the major triggers for me. I can let chocolate lie opened in the refrigerator for days without eating it, but the peanut butter disappears once it’s in the house!

Renee – how many days are you planning on going to the gym a week? Are you following a set program? Congratulations on a good food day, btw!

I think I’m on the fence when it comes to losing weight right now. I’m a bit off in my eating – not much, but a little. And I have to figure out what’s going on with me, and how I can deal with the stress in a better way than eating (peanut butter ;) ).
Renee – you’re right though: I definitely could start thinking about changing the pace, and start thinking about the specifics. How would it change my present eating – what would change, how would that be, etc.

Ah, well. Have a nice Wednesday!

I just wanted to say hi - I got a pretty good performance review today considering. Super busy - will try to get on later. I hope everyone is doing well.

Mette- this will be my first week going 3x a week. I'm playing W, F, Su. as my days. I had pizza for lunch. It seems like I've totally fallen apart on the eating side of things. Which is sad since I've made such good strides with the gym and lifting. I think I need to sit down and write out my meal plans or something. Get back into habit. It's even more difficult because I know what success feels like, and not having it is killing me.

I've been debating about paying for a few PT sessions, if only to get a personalized metabolic reading and figure out what a healthy goal is. Maybe for me, weighing 150 and being fit is where I should be, and 130 is a goal that is only leading to failure.

Also mette- how quickly do you build muscle? If I wanted to keep track of my measurements now, how many weeks does it usually take to see a difference. I am slow to acknowledge progress, but hasty to judge it as 'failing'.

The lady for horseback riding lessons never called, and I'll take that as a sign from above to look elsewhere for sure. It's hard to find western riding lessons nearby me though.

Can't think what else to say right now. I am eating a bologna sandwich now, since I hit the gym right after work today. Maybe I will stop and get smoothie ingredients on the way home. I really want a rasberry smoothie.

Ah crappy. Mette - can you email me that spreadsheet again? I saw it come in when I was at work, and now when I look for it, it's gone! :(

Renee - do you bring your gym clothes to work? Do you ever problems with being hungry at the end of the day and then not wanting to go workout hungry?

Wow - taxes - I guess I should get on that soon. I guess just one more thing to add to the list.

mette - complain all you want. It's good that you can differentiate between acceptable/good stress from your job and bad stress. In a couple of weeks you'll wonder what all of the fuss was about. :) Just keep trying your best.

I like smooth/creamy peanutbutter. I'll eat the natural or Reese's. I have to admit that I like the R's better but I know it's not as good for you. I am VERY bad about not letting food sit in my house. It is one reason why I don't keep much food and a major part of my problem. If I have the food I eat too much and if I don't have it I feel deprived. It may be better to not buy it all the time. It's not really the kind of food that you can divide into portions unfortunately. Can you hide it? At least if you don't see it you won't be reminded that it is there. Although it may be a good idea to start thinking about how you would change your eating/life to lose weight again, I would not suggest you do it yet. You need some time to adjust to the "job" and the new schedule. Don't throw too many things in the mix just yet.

Renee - if you feel like you can't get the answers anywhere else, I would recommend that you splurge for the PT sessions. You are being so good about going to the gym and it would be great to keep up the motivation with realistic goals and an appropriate workout plan. Doing things "right" may also help accelerate your progress.

Today I was home because they finally came to finish putting insulation in my house. I needed to get it done but I couldn't afford the day off from work. I have a paper due Tuesday and it's barely started. I don't like the stress at all but I feel like I must do this. It winds me up though and makes it hard to sleep. May I join the club as someone who is not eating well? :( One of these days I'll get on track. I just don't really know why it hasn't happened yet. I guess it's because I eat to deny the emotions and thoughts that I have about the stress in my life. There's got to be a better way.

Goodnight Ladies.

Hi ladies,

So much for being part of the group again!! Well, my grandfather has been very sick recently, then better, and then this week, sick again, so I've been spending my evenings with him and my grandma.

Ang, I'm sorry to hear your mother is not better. It is very stressful to watch family members suffer when there's nothing you can do for them. My grandpa is 87 so he's lived a good, long life, but he's determined to live to be 100, so he's going to fight every step of the way.

Other than that, work is still pretty good, although now that I don't smoke I'm realizing just how stressed out it gets me at times. In fact I literally broke out in hives the other day from the stress! Yikes! I'm listening to relaxation CDs, practicing deep breathing, and exercising, so I know that's helping at least a little. As long as I don't "stress eat," I'll be ok. Sounds like we are all definitely experiencing a lot of stress these days!

Mette: Congrats on reaching this phase in your studies; sounds like you will be learning a lot and yes, challenges can be good things!

Renee: Thank you for the welcome back. You have done REALLY well since joining this group, 30 lbs. lost!! That's awsome!

Allright, I hate to cut it short but I should get to bed. Talk to you all soon!

Yea - it's Friday!
 

Jessica, I'm sorry to hear about your grandfather. Is there anything in particular that he is battling? I know that even a cold can be a problem for the elderly. I hope he gets better soon. You are lucky that you are close enough to see him so often. I am thankful that my mother can talk on the phone so we 'visit' everyday.

Renee - have you been able to get your spreadsheet set up for the gym?

mette - how was work this week?

I think I am going to paint tonight. If I can finish the touch up on the trim I will be done painting my living and dining rooms. It will be good to actually finish somiething in the house.

Work beckons...later :)

Hi Ladies! It’s Friday at last. TGIF and all that!

Ang – you’re right as usual: it’s good to differentiate between acceptable stress and bad stress. At least the acceptable stress has the potential of becoming something good! Hopefully you’re right – and it will all be over soon! Thank you for reminding me, I needed that!

Renee – I like your exercise plan a lot! 3 days a week worked well for me too. As for food: maybe you can keep your main focus on getting the exercise done for a couple of weeks, and just try to keep your eating resembling what you have eaten for the last days for now?
A few PT sessions sounds like an excellent idea too – and reevaluating weight goals is something I do constantly. I can see that Ang is 100% correct about this too, btw: and it’s probably not the right time to do that when you’re really stressed out.

As for the speed of building muscle – you really have to ask somebody else! ;) (Jessica???) I have no idea! My focus has just been on getting stronger (which I have). I don’t even do measurements. I know I'm getting fitter, but the important part for me is that I'm getting stronger!
From what I've read - progress takes time, one should be patient and all that - but it's all probably different for everybody! Ask the PT if you get one!
I’ll resend the e-mail if I can find it, I probably deleted it. I’ll see what I can do.

Ang – I think what you think: it’s better for me not to buy the trigger food I think. Maybe I can keep it as a special treat and just not buy it very often. Like once every 6 months or something… :lol:

How did the insulation of your house go? Hopefully you’ll be able to keep warm from now on!
I don’t sleep well when I’m stressed either, Ang. I work with patients who live with chronic pain (different reasons), and with some of them I teach muscle relaxation exercises to help people control their pain a little better, since many patients have chronic unconscious muscle tension from living with pain. And the two weeks I’ve been there, I’ve been a little stressed out at times and haven’t slept very well – so I’ve been trying out these techniques on myself at night, in bed, when I can’t sleep. Sometimes they do help. Just focusing on your breathing and letting thoughts just pop up and float away without getting caught up in them can help me fall asleep.
Have you ever tried relaxations exercises, yoga, meditation, or similar things, Ang?

Jessica – I’m so sorry to hear about your grandfather. I hope he’ll get better soon! It sounds very nice for you (and him) that you get to spend a lot of time with him and your grandmother, though.
All of us are living stressful lives these days! But at least you’re doing the relaxation exercises, Jessica! :D Good for you!

I’m off to do some more work. See you guys later. Have a wonderful Friday! :D

Where did everybody go? :wave:

I hope you all had great weekends - mine was OK. I got some work done, and some house work too: a bit cleaning and tidying is always a good thing.
I just wanted to pop my head in and say “hi” – I don’t have much to say right now. Not having the best of days these days, but hoping they’ll get better soon.
Have good Mondays everybody! :^:

Where did my posting go? I had posted on Saturday but it doesn't seem to be here. How frustrating.

My weekend was so-so because I was sick the whole time. I am still battling being tired and a cough but have to finish a paper by tomorrow so I am at work. It's hard to concentrate though and not much time left so sorry this is short.

On top of everything I did not get much sleep last night because Rhody's (farmer) neighbor decided to call me at midnight and accuse me of taking advantage of Rhody. The nerve. Especially considering I was sick, which I told her, who calls that late. I did not appreciate her attitude. I told bf about it (Rhody's nephew) and he was not happy. He may actually call her and tell her off a little. We'll see.

mette - what's wrong that you are not having the best of days? Talk to us...we want to listen.

mette - I went through a period of time where I bought almost nothing to eat in my house because I was too scared that I'd eat it all (because I would have). I just spent some time trying to be more 'normal' and the problems are coming back. I think I am going back to not buying anything for the house that isn't 'approved' until I can figure out how to control my feellings/life/eating. Overall you seem to have much better control but if there are certain problem foods sometimes you just can't keep them handy all of the time. How are your cravings these days?

BTW - the insulation is finally done at my house. I still have to have the inspection and complain about some broken shingles, but they are gone and the house can only be warmer. BF and I are now putting rollout insulation in the attic and have gotten 1/3 done. I think I may already be able to tell a little difference, although it could be the warm (40s) weather we're having.

Still having trouble sleeping. I have taken some classes in relaxation and breathing, etc. I think I'll have to try them again.

Take care everyone.

Hi Ang – good to see you here, but sorry you’ve been sick – and that you have to be at work when you’re not feeling well. :(
Sorry about rude neighbours calling in the middle of the night too! Really – who does that??? Calling up people for upsetting conversations at midnight? Good to hear the bf wasn’t happy either!

As for me - I’m just feeling down these days. It feels like I’m not having enough energy. I can’t remember whether I’ve told you that I started up in therapy again last October, and my new therapist is wonderful – I really like her. I’ve had periods of depression throughout my twenties and thirties – so I’m a bit scared that I’m on the verge of another long term depression. It helps to have somebody like my therapist telling me and reminding me that not everything repeats itself – sometimes things get better because you’ve learnt better ways of coping. I’m not destined to get depressed again, even if I’ve been depressed several times before. So I’m trying to keep active and social, even if it means that I have to spend a lot of my energy doing things I normally do effortlessly.

And I have to clean up my eating too; eating really is the first thing to “go” when I get like this. The cravings get too hard to handle somehow – or maybe I’ve spent all my energy on other things. And I can’t see that eating well makes me feel better in the long term – I can just see that eating makes me feel good/numb/relaxed right now. I think maybe I’ll get out my old food journal and start writing down what I eat, where I eat, why I eat, and how I feel when I eat it again.

Good to hear that the insulation is done! And good luck on your paper – hopefully you’ll sleep better without rude neighbours calling! (And I’m sure that you know that sex is the best sleep medication ever!?!? ;) )

Take care!

Hey ladies. Just checking in. Things are nuts lately. I had a lovely weekend and the new horse farm rescue place is great. I'll definitely return there.

Woke up sick on Sunday so skipped the gym and really kind of feel bad about it. Not sure I am ready to go back to it today, still a bit off.

Just called and went through the hassle of changing my gyne doc. I am tired of feeling like they won't work with me. They keep giving me the 'Lets try a new brand of Birth Control' approach when a) my mother and grandmother died of breast cancer and the link between the two is in constant debate b) my last pap came back slightly abnormal and c) I've been spotting for a full twenty days now. I mean really, can we get this sorted out for good?

The even more frustrating part was that I had to pay $20 to get the old office to release to mail me my OWN records! I hate our health care in this country, I really do.

Eating has not been good, but not been bad. Now that I am sick, I feel less motivated to make healthy choices, and just go for the easy ones.

Ending on a happy note, I went out with friends on Friday who had not seen me in four months, and they did a shot in honor of my weight loss and looking good. Everyone commented on it, and the one girl who started SBD with me said 'Hey skinny' when I walked in. It felt very good. And really makes me want to keep going. -Well, once I am over this cold.

Oh and mette - got the email, looks awesome. Way better than my crappy sheet did. Hehe. Thanks!

Wednesday already. Just checking in. :coffee:

Renee – best of luck in your hunt for a new, improved doc. And good to hear that you liked the new horse farm.
I love to hear others' stories about weight loss and other people noticing – like your friends did the other night, Renee. But when it happens to me, I’m always embarrassed and end up explaining, making excuses, or just babbling! It seems I still haven’t learned how to execute the simple and graceful “Thank you”! :^: Good to hear that you have!

Ang – hope you’re doing well with your stress and your paper and your neighbours and sickness!

Jessica - hope you're doing well too. And that your grandfather is getting better.

Nothing new here. Just long stressful days. I started reading the “Lucifer” series (graphic novels) by Mike Carey a while back, and I just got the 4th book of the series – so I’m looking forward to my coach, a blanket, possibly some hot cocoa – and a brand new book! It’s going to be the highlight of my week I think! :p

Hi Ladies - still sick here so going to take another nap. I just wanted to say hello. I'll be back wihen I can stand sitting at the computer for more than 1 minute.

Renee - I hope you are feeling better.
mette - Are you enjoying your book?

I rented a couple of movies so I'm going to nap while watching one. :)

Hey gals.

Ang- Ugh, I know how that goes, I've been fighting off a minor cold since Sunday. It hasn't gotten to the miserable stage yet, but enough to be annoying and make you tired and lazy.

And the only breafkast that feels good to eat on my sore throat is burritos! Bad me!! :p On the flip side, I am eating so little the burritos are not likely to really hurt me too much.

What has me more frustrated is how well I was doing with going to the gym, and now I haven't gone in 5 days because I've been too blah and sore and sniffly. I'm hoping that by this weekend, I'll be better.

Not much else going on, other than being really tired of winter. I need to find a place to live that has a shorter winter. This is too much. :P I need sun darnit!

Hope everyone feels better, gets better, etc etc. Talk to you guys later.

Hope you guys are OK and doing well! :hat:

I’m starting to get into a routine and getting more of a grip on my days. I had some out-of-control eating days that kind of freaked me out for a while there. I’m always scared when I overeat completely out of control, because I always think that it will never end – and that I’m going to end up gaining 100lbs.
But right now, things are coming together a little, I think. So that’s my good news.

Sorry about the short post – I just got a surprise visit from my niece this weekend. Which was very nice.
Have great weekends everybody!

Hi everyone,

Ang and Renee, are you both feeling better? I think we're all in the same boat!

I've had the flu since last Saturday. I finally started getting better on Wednesday of this week, went back to work on Thursday. That's the second time I've been really sick already this year. It's putting a bit of a damper on my "healthy" plan for the year, but I'll get through. I've used up all of my sick time and I'm sure they aren't thrilled in my office that I've been out, but what can you do?

Renee: Normally I'd tell you to come move to So Cal near me, but we've had so much RAIN this winter, it's not really the fun, sunny place it usually is. I hope your weather gets better soon.

Mette: I'm sorry you've been feeling down lately. I'm glad you like your new therapist, though. I know that it can really help to have a trained, unbiassed person to talk with when you're going through tough times.

Thanks everyone for their wishes for my grandpa. He's doing really well (considering the Dr. didn't think he would survive that first night) and is back in the nursing home with grandma. I haven't been to visit since I've been sick and hopefully will spend some time with them this weekend.

Other than that, not much new here. I bought a really awsome "Cooking Light" magazine that has so many delicious sounding recipes, I hardly know where to start. I better get my grocery list together!

Talk to you all soon!

Hi there...sorry I was gone for so long but I stayed out sick the rest of the week and just wasn't on the computer. I'm off to bed now but wanted to say hello. I hope everyone is well and I will write more and respond to the posts I missed tomorrow (back to work).

Hey ladies.

Things are going alright here. I am still hovering at the same weight despite no exercise and really, not too much of an eating regime. I am hoping to get back on track with it today - though the ice cream at home needs to go. :p

I had an alright weekend. I am feeling alright, but not yet fully better. I still get sniffles and at night, sometimes my nose heh heh, it whistles when I breath, and it wakes me up! :lol:

My sister is out of town until Thursday, meaning my bro-in-law will be doing the cooking. Last night he made chicken and fresh steamed cauliflower. Not too bad!

I am planning on getting back to the gym this week too. I hope I haven't lost my interest. :p Right now, I am sorta 'eh, I should go' - as opposed to the 'Oh I wanna go, so I don't miss a single day in my plan.' It's amazing how quick habits (that you didn't want) can fall back into non-existence.

Anyway, that's where we are for now. Been rainy, cold and damp for a week or so now. Bleeeeeh.

Here's to a good week for all of us!

I'm back!
 

It's amazing how far behind you get when you get sick (or take vacation - or so I'm told :)). I'm finally feeling a lot better and getting back in control of work stuff.

Renee - how are things going with your new gyn? I hope you get that all straightened out soon. Issues like those can be very frightening. My mother had cervical cancer so I get a little extra anxious. You need to give yourself a break while you are sick. You were doing so well and you can get back to it. Unfortunately getting sick hit you at a bad time. Habits can come and go pretty easily. Try to remember what made you start last time and after a couple of times you'll probably be right back into it. You have a cool spreadsheet to fill in. :) Let us know when you get back to the gym.

mette - Was your eating a reaction to your stress? Do you feel better about school now? Have you done anything in particular to try to get things to come together for you? I hope you had a great weekend with your niece.

Jessica - Have you been able to visit your grandparents? How about the recipes? Any good ones to share? I actually cooked last night for bf. In some ways I am eating better with him around. We cook at my house semi-regularly so I am relearning what a pot is for. :lol:

Being sick is definitely not a good thing. Jessica - your coworkers can't blame you for being sick. You could've gone in and given it to them if they would have rathered. ;)

It is 50 and sunny here today and I am stuck inside. It's still nice to see the sun out of my window. Tomorrow I change offices and get a view of a horse farm! i can't wait.

Back to work - I finished the papers I was working on and now it's off to the next thing. btw - One of my papers was accepted for a conference in June. I will be going to Las Vegas - never been and kind of excited. I think bf may come with me. That would be a first (to have a companion on one of these trips).

I hope everyone is feeling better - new week, new opportunities.


P.S. sorry to include something not upbeat, but it looks like my farmer friend (Rhody) is dying. He has pneumonia in his nursing home and the doctors are 'making him comfortable" because he doesn't want to be revived. It's sad but probably for the best if he wasn't going to get much better. He hated being away from home on his tractor. I just don't deal with death well at all but I need to be there for bf. It could make for a very awkward time coming up.

I’m back too!!!
 

…even if I’m a bit late. I did have a nice weekend with my niece, spent Monday trying to study, and yesterday after work I went out for beers with friends. I don’t drink a lot of alcohol so I feel a bit off today…
Hope everybody’s feeling better and that you’re all back to your old healthy selves! ;)

Jessica – good to hear your grandfather is doing well.
Ang – great that you’re back in control at work, and big congratulations on getting your paper accepted! You go girl! :D
Sorry about your farmer friend though – must be hard for both you and your bf.

My eating was definitely a reaction to stress and the big change in my daily routines. The first two weeks at “work” was very stressful (I was scared most of the time – afraid to make mistakes, afraid that I wouldn’t know what to do, afraid that I’d make everybody worse, etc etc.) – I had to have some serious conversations with my anxiety to get some perspective on the catastrophes I imagined all the time.
After 3-4 weeks I’m calming down, and I’m getting into more of a routine with my eating, exercise, sleeping, etc – you know: the basic stuff.

To stop myself eating chocolate and cookies everyday I added good things into my evenings (I did all my overeating in the evenings after work): proper food to eat, cups of hot spicy tea, naps under the blanket, nice books to read, nice movies to watch, nice people to spend time with. And I didn’t force myself to stop eating sweets – I knew that the eating was, on one level, my way of trying to give myself something good, trying to take care of myself in the midst of being stressed out. So I just tried to keep my eyes open (what am I feeling? What is the chocolate doing for me? How can I get that without overeating?), I recorded everything I ate – even when I had 3000+ days. In a week and a half I got my eating together again. And I didn’t gain more than a pound or two.

It was the first out-of-control-overeating-period I’ve had in almost a year, and it scared me. I found myself afraid that I was going to eat, eat, and eat – and never stop.
Being able to put into use the stuff I’ve learned the last year, and break the binging-cycle early makes me feel very good about my ability to manage bad periods too. I feel safer. And I’ve found that I can live very well being somebody who overeats chocolate and cookies a couple of weeks when my life changes dramatically.

I’m off to do something useful. Have nice Wednesdays everybody!

mette - I am so impressed with how well you are able to deal with things. You seem to know a lot about how to think through your issues. Congratulations on dealing with such a big change so well. Not only did you get through it relatively unscathed, but you seem to have learned a valuable lesson about your abilities. Good for you. I knew you could do it and now you know too. :)

I am moving offices today so it's been a little bit of an off day. It's good though because I am cleaning and organizing at the same time, which I needed. I feel like I can come in tomorrow and really get going now on work.

Still no exercising for me but a little bit better control of my eating. No true binges in a few days. btw - my mother's medication was changed and she seems to be doing a little better. Yea! I'll take everyday I can get with her and it's even better that she is relatively happy during her last weeks/months/or whatever. It's definitely quality and not quantity. When I start taking some control again I think there are a few lessons that I am learning through all of these trials.

Take care all.

Wow, I have to agree with Ang, mette that is incredible how you can stop, take a look at things and work it out like that. Me? I made the mistake of buying a bag of easter candy for at work. Yesterday, after two days of eating 6+ eggs a day, I gave it to my coworker and said to keep it out of my office. I don't ever even necessarily want it. I just eat it. Boredom/stress related I guess. But how do I find alternatives to cope with that at work?

My saving grace yesterday was that I went back to the gym after my week off. (The being sick week) It amazed me how quickly you can fall out of shape, or maybe, that I had gotten into better shape in just three weeks of having gone consistently. I also discovered that I really like the lat pull down machine! I've been using my book (and my spreadsheet wee) and thinking about trying pilates. I don't want to mess with yoga because I am not really into that whole spirituality mind body yada yada stuff. Well, I mean, I have my own thing already and that stuff doesn't sit kosher with my current religious views. So I figured, pilates, for strength, flexibility and breathing - without all the meditational stuff. Maybe that'd be good for stress management/relief.

Hoping to get back onto a better eating regime. The house has suddenly reappeared stocked with ice cream and cookies and treats. It's like we all are falling off the wagon. It makes it so hard to avoid the bad stuff though too, and if I had the control to eat just one, or two.. ya know, moderate portions, maybe it'd be okay but this is insane.

Well, hope everything goes well for you all. Let's keep truckin' along on this journey! *phew*

Renee - I have the same problems. I get hungry at work because I am sitting all day and get bored. I try not to keep food in my office to combat the problem but I still eat more (planned snacks and larger lunches) at work than I would if I were out and about. What do we do? Sometimes I wish I chewed gum. I also have the problem with having stuff in the house (like a bag of candy). I don't necessarily want it but it 'calls' to me and I eat it. Sometimes I think it has to do with feeling deprived and when it's there it's like a treat that I must have in case it disappears and I can never get it again (I didn't say it was a logical thought. :)). It's become a real problem because I want to buy things 'good' to have in the house for when bf comes over but then I eat the extras. It's really becoming a big problem because bf shouldn't have to suffer but he doesn't really understand my problem. He thinks I should just have will power (although he tries to be supportive and is very nice about it). mette - can you suggest anything for us?

Congratulations Renee on going back to the gym. :strong: :cp: :cb: I'm so glad that you liked it the first day back so maybe the habit will just start up again. It gives me hope that if I ever get off my butt I may remember enjoying exercise and start to do it regularly. I have done Pilates before and it is pretty good. I recommend it. Are you thinking of a tape or class? Mat or machine?

I haven't started writing things down at home so I'm going to start here a little for me. Comment or not, it's ok. I just need to start thinking more about my habits. It's a first step and I hope a decent first step.

Wednesday: busy day at work moving office with errands after work until 6:30pm
B - apple
L - turkey and cheese sandwich, orange, single serving chips, carrots
D - baked pasta dish with meat sauce, slice honey grain bread; too much pound cake
Note - I was too hungry when I got home and ate dinner too fast, not satisfied and possibly ate more cake to try and feel satisfied (mentally, not physically); no phone calls and felt alone

Thursday: got period yesterday and battling migraines and bloating and fatigue so not walking at lunch (at least that's the excise today)
B - apple
S - organic cereal bar
L - turkey and cheese sandwich, carrots, chips, apple (out of oranges :()

Ang - how did the move into your new office go? Are you enjoying it? You seem to be dealing with your mother's illness well, and I love what you're saying about focusing on the quality instead of the quantity. I think we all probably should try to do that more.
Renee - congrats on getting back to the gym. I've heard good things about Pilates and stress relief too. It sounds like a very good idea.

My approach to my own overeating is that there's most likely some reason for it. So I try to figure out what eating feels like, what it makes me feel. I try not to focus on whether it's good or bad - just to be curious and open-minded, and try to see what's going on. What does eating make me feel like? And how can I get that feeling from other things? What other things will do that for me? Somebody probably react better to discipline, but when I'm overeating I nearly always do it because I feel small, tired, depressed, afraid, cold, etc. And I don't react well to discipline when I'm feeling like that: I react much better to warmth, TLC, things that feel good, taste good, smell good, instead. So for me it's about doing nice and kind things for myself. Not forcing the chocolate out of my fingers, not yelling at myself, not making everything around me bright, cold and hard (it's how I think of discipline! ;) ).

And I really understand what you're saying about feeling deprived, Ang. I do think you need to think long and hard about how you can give yourself something that feels valuable and good - that's not food. How to make you feel (the good things) food is giving you/makes you feel. Maybe without taking the food out at first. Just keep adding good things into your life, before you start taking out food. Since you emotionally depend on eating, maybe you need to build up your support system before you take support (food) away?
There really aren't any easier answers, are there?

When it comes to boredom eating, mindless eating, etc - I totally agree with what Renee is doing: removing the candy!
I'm also a believer in building good habits and better routines: and only eat when you’re 100% present and awake! :D
How to find better ways of dealing with stress and boredom at work? Good question! I want to know too! I try to clean up my environment (no candy or cookies at my desk!) and try to never get really, really hungry (several small meals/snacks during the day!). I also drink tea I really like: I have brought with me some spicy tea I love. And sugar-free sweets. And gum.
I used to eat candy at work before - and it's really a very bad habit. When 'sitting at my desk and working' became a trigger for eating chocolate I knew I was in trouble! I had to wean myself off it to make 'not eating candy' the normal state again!

And Ang: I don't keep stuff I binge on in the house either. Maybe I will be able to do that sometime in the future, but not right now. Will power has never been very useful or helpful for me - but clean/empty cupboards have! ;)

Starting to write down and think about your habits is a great place to start, Ang.
As for your eating Wednesday: I would have starved to death eating only 3 times a day, and only an apple for breakfast? Aren’t you hungry?
I eat a small meal before I leave work in the afternoon so that I don't come home starving. I try not to get really hungry, because it triggers binging and feelings of deprivation. Just like you described you were feeling, Ang. Have you considered that maybe you're feeling deprived simply because you are depriving yourself? I think I would feel deprived too, if I didn’t eat more than that.

My yesterday looked like this:
B: oatmeal, cinnamon, banana, milk, coffee (w/ milk)
S: orange, tea
L: sandwich with cheese, red peppers, 1 pear, tea
S: sandwich with cheese, 1 apple, tea
D: beans in tomato sauce, ½ onion, ½ red pepper, 6 champignons, 1 tomato, coffee (w/milk)
S: coffee & sugar free dark (bitter) chocolate, 1 orange
S: 1 cup of (sugar free, fat free, completely fake!) cocoa

Estimate: about 1600 calories. Not enough protein, but on the positive side: I wasn't really hungry at any time during the day. No feelings of deprivation, no binge-urges. I drank my water, I complained about the cold and wet weather, I got to sleep at a reasonable time. A fairly OK day. Low in calories because of the last weeks’ calorie-overindulgence! :D

Have a great Friday, guys!

The move was relatively easy since I had help from our facilities guys. I have more room and am settled in as well as in the old office. I still have some files to go through and such but they've been sitting for months so I'll get to them a little at a time. So far I like this office much better. Now, if I could only get some of my work done. :)

It isn't so easy to build up a support system. I am trying with the bf and I am meeting new people in my town but it takes time. I'm very insecure and have trouble getting close to people. I'm sure I'm one step away from making a person dislike me - I'm paranoid. Right now I'm trying to get to know two new women in town and it's so stressful. I don't want to push too hard but I don't want them to think I don't care about them either. Where's the line?

mette - what do you do when you have company if you want to offer them something to eat or drink? With special ocassions it is fine, but with bf over regularly I don't know what to do?

And mette - you've given me a lot to think about but I'm short on time write now so I'll comment more later on deprivation. I am going to try and keep up somewhat with this writing. Where was I....

Thursday
D - piece of Italian calzone; pita with homemade dip of red pepper, eggplant, garlic, onion (very good); 2 truffles

Friday
B - high fiber cereal
L - chicken and provolone on croissant, brownie

I'm going out to dinner with bf and I'm craving a salad so we'll see. More later. Enjoy your weekends!