Stormy - I Agree with you about the scales! they can be so meanspirited at times. I didn't lose for a week and then suddenly, after TOM finally arrived, I dropped 4 poounds in two days. So hang in there and know it's coming. Don't get discouraged!!! Just tuck them away and know you've been good, so your time is coming!! Good luck at the Christmas party tonight. And good luck finding healthy food too! It's hard sometimes...at ours all I saw was the crappy/yummy stuff so I suffered through, then at the end of the night I saw a huge tray of veggies everyone had been standing around to talk (it was by the bar) and I never noticed it. It was also mostly untouched. I could have pigged out by then!!! But they were cleaning up so I waited til I got home and had a salad then. Man being good sucks sometimes, but it's worth it!!! And all that exercise is boosting your metabolism too, so you'll be able to eat more and get away with a little more than without it!! Good for you.

Stormy - I love to travel too!! I had a hard time over Thanksgiving because I use to have a tradition of meeting a group of friends in Texas and then heading to Mexico for a week of backpacking. It was always so much fun and SOOO different than anything here. I loved it! Most of my travel is in the US now though.

OH - I'm planning a trip to see my family and was concerned because they wouldn't know a healthy food if it tackled them! I called my sister yesterday to kind of warn her that I'm eating a lot differntly now, and wouldn't you know it - she tells me she's eating all organic based on an allergy test she had done to help with some issues she's having. We're so much alike it's freaky!! Always shocks us both how we stumble into the same kinds of things without each other knowing. Anyway, I'm going in late January and I'm really looking forward to it. Also found our she's lost 20 pounds since I last saw her! MORE reasons to lose some weight - I don't want to the be the "chubby sister." :)

Hi everyone!
I am sick with the flu so I wont be on much- sorry.
I am trying to read along but I feel like crap so I am sleeping on and off all day...
anyway- hope everyone is good! Keep talking.

Poor thing!! Take care of yourself! Hope everyone is feeling back to normal soon!! Rest and get well.

Crimegirl, I am so sorry that you are not feeling well. :(
Take care of yourself. This is an easy time of year to get sick b/c of the weather changes, the stress of the holidays, etc

Crimegirl I believe it was you who asked me about exercise videos. This site
http://www.collagevideo.com/ allows you to enter in your info such as beginner, advanced, etc and what you are looking for (low impact, toning,etc.). It then gives you a list of all videos out there. The cool thing about it is that you can read customer reviews on each video. This helps out a lot.

Exercise has never been a problem for me. I have always loved it. I started doing aerobics in 5th grade :lol: My problem is eating. Emotional eating...portion control etc :mad: If I would not exercise I would have a lot more than 40 pounds to lose :^:

Last night my hubby and I were talking about health. Neither one of us has great genes. Diabetes and heart disease run on both sides of the family and cancer plus diabetes and heart disease on my side. I can either keep rolling with the punches and choosing to make the wrong eating decisions and die or feel like I am dying at a relatively young age or I can choose to live and live healthy.

need a lift. . . .need to reconfirm my goals
 

Good morning everybody. Glad to see there was some action here. It gets awful lonely on the weekends for me because of the time difference and well, just in general. By the way, I think someone was asking and I forgot to answer, the time difference here is 14 hours ahead of U.S. East Coast. So, to make it easy to figure, just add 2 hours and change the a.m. to p.m. or vice versa and it's always ahead, the next day because of the date line out there in the Pacific somewhere. So, right now it's 7 a.m. Sunday, which means 5 p.m. Saturday afternoon on the East Coast. Ok?

I'm not doing too well. Foodwise, I've been great but I'm starting to feel the depression, the what the heck, no one cares, just go and do what I've always done, eat the food I want, do the things I want even if they make me fat and look a lot worse than I could look. I don't know. I just need some support, someone who cares besides me and I don't have that. I mean, do you realize how most people couldn't care one iota what you look like, and, in fact, would rather you looked worse than they did so they can look better in comparison? Sometimes, it just all seems like my meaningless little plan to get looking good and then. . . for what? Oh, bad thought, I know. I have to think of things that will make me feel good because right now, though I've been so good with eating I still have the crap of work to deal with. Last night I had to give up a great night out with a band I know because one) I had work to do and didn't want to have any hangover or have extra calories and two) I was so tired from getting off this caffeine and three) I was just feeling so down about work and how, though I still have some work, I've been ousted from what I had looked forward to doing, and yet, not having anything else to do I had to just kind of smile and take it, making my boss very happy but only because he got what he wanted without a lot of confrontation, which he hates.

Someone give me some help, pleeeez! I've got a ton of work ahead of me today and all I really wanted to do was sit back and try to ride out this lethargy and headaches caused from the caffeine withdrawal. I am so tempted to reach for a quick fix.

*************

Crimegirl -- I hope you're feeling better. Flu is the pits. I hope you have the time to relax and recuperate and won't feel too down about things.

stormy -- we are the same with eating. I'm not adverse to exercise at all but have a hard time not trying to fill the holes, round the edges or temper the highs of emotion with food. I have often thought that I would be much, much heavier if I didn't exercise. The problem is, my body is also very sensitive, so if I do eat things that I want that make me feel happy or something like sweets, it snowballs and I can't stop at just a little. Eating clean is boring and doesn't give me the druglike effect. I guess I'm like some addict or something because of the very real effects of food on brain chemistry etc.

little grasshopper -- your encouragement to stormy was nice to read. And it does suck eating clean, doesn't it. Too bad you didn't find that veggie platter earlier at your party but major kudos to you for getting through it with flying colors anyhow!! :cp:

I want to travel more in the States sometime. I never got to see all that much of it although we did do a lot of travel when I was kid, summer vacations and such and in the meantime I've been more places visiting friends (all who I got to know while in Tokyo!) I also did a trip for work back in '89 to "Outlaw Country" that was cool. Because I was digging up a story I had to go into shops, bars, whatever and talk to people to get my story. That was neat and I would never have done it if I hadn't been kind of forced to. I had a story to get or else. . .

Good to hear your sister is eating healthy too these days. It's the worst to be on vacation or visiting and find nothing but junk (delectable, scrumptious junk!). Because it's a special time it feels like you automatically have license to pig out.

Thanks too, for realizing that my life comes at a horribly high price. I always hear people say I'm "getting to do things" but nothing comes for free and I sacrifice so many things others have. Everyone has a choice. The life of today is the result of our choices of yesterday, everyone. Some are harder, some involve others and thus are harder to change once they've been made. Perhaps, when I get down, I should think of people such as women in certain countries who will be tortured or killed for trying to make a choice. Still, it's very hard dealing with the jealousy of others, because they don't look past the results of my choices or try to understand what lies behind the results. If it was mere jealousy I could deal with it, but that jealousy is often linked to conniving and deceptive activities that really hurt me in much more than emotional ways. Ah, such is life. Such are people. Gotta focus on one's self and not do the same. I often think, "There but for the grace of God, go I." And I don't mean that in a fatalistic way, such as that I have no hand in it, and it's fate's choice or God's choice. I mean, that for some reason, a combination of my own choices and the circumstances that allowed me to make them, I am not in the same situation as others who I'd rather not be in their situation.

So, tell me, what kind of cheese do you take with you to restaurants? Is it soy cheese or something else.

Good luck on finding a new gym. That old one sounds horrible. I go to a great Gold's here and it can be a great socializing spot as well.

Ok, must go. Hope to hear from you soon. :wave:

Red balloon, you are doing so good. Keep it up! I know it has to be hard but you will pull through. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Little Grasshopper, you will look great by your trip!

Ok, I have to start getting ready for this party!

Redballoon - I think I've decided what you're going through is completely normal. We've all gone through it at one point or another and will probably go through it again. Maybe it's boredom, maybe fear that we won't succeed, maybe it's just withdrawal, or maybe it's mourning what can't be anymore. My greatest wish, as selfish as it is, would be to be able to eat what ever I wanted with no negative side effects. It helps me sometimes (SOMETIMES) to think of everything I eat as a chemical. Basically that's what it is in the end...then I think of the bad things as the really scary chemicals....kind of like you do. I'm trying my best to make my home, car and office as non toxic as possible. That makes it a little easier to leave the bad foods alone - I wonder what they will do to my poor body when I eat them. I have to say though, today has been really really hard for me too. I think there was too much time at home. No bad food here but a lot of food. You are doing a great job. Don't forget an important thing - rewards!!! there have to be rewards! Non food related, if possible. I set a reward that when I hit 15 pounds I'm going to get a facial. I use to get them all the time before I became a starving college student :) When I hit my goal weight I'm going to buy REALLY great jeans!! I've always wanted a pair. And if I can keep it off - I'm going to use my travel fund and take Greg to Yosemite National park, a bit sooner than we'd planned. I'm dieing to go back and he's never been. Not that you can't live unless you're thin and perfect but I work better with goals and I'm like you guys in that I can do a little....it's all or nothing!

I can eat rice cheese. Luckily they make several kinds. I'm going to be tested for goat cheese and yogurt and stuff. Dairy here is so processed that most people are allergic to it and don't realize it. People from other countries are rarely ever allergic to dairy - not here. I'm hoping if I try goat milk or raw cow's milk I'll be okay. We'll see. I don't miss the milk, I miss yogurt and cheese and sourcream.

So in case that wasn't supportive enough....You really ARE doing a great job. You have a lot of stress on your table and you seem to be handling it well. You just have to get through it one baby step at a time. And don't forget you're still in caffeine withdrawal - that can kick butt, but it usually only lasts for 3-4 days. Hang in there, it's worth it!!!! You're worth every bit of it!!!

I'll check back in later. I hope you're having a good Sunday through it all.

thanks people! feeling better. . . . up and down we go . . .
 

little grasshopper Redballoon -


stormy, little grasshopper -- thanks so much for your encouragement and support. I felt OK after riding and coming home. Ate a big sweet potato and am about to sit down to some work. The main work is still hanging over my head. Ugh. It's some horrible translation, such publicity stuff for some big fancy, expensive club here, the likes of which I'll never probably see unless it's just as a press person. Oh well, translation means money. The other is simple proofreading. Horrible manuscript though. I can't believe some of the drivel that is published as books. But worst of all, I know there's a letter from the tax office that's to arrive and I'm dreading what this is going to mean. . . I know it's nothing good. Oh well, carry on. You know, I wish life was easy, that it was just about eating good food and exercising. But it's everything but, isn't it? I mean, that's where the problems come in. I really want coffee. I know the caffeine would knock out this depression and negativity, give me that druggie high. Oh God, what an addict.

Yeah, grasshopper, "mourning what can't be anymore" that's an interesting thought. Part of this is that I think. The thing with work, the drastic change in plans. Even though today I wrote down all the reasons it wouldn't have been a good situation to have gotten that project and contract I still was looking forward to the good things about it, a neat desk of my own, being able to work alone on a project that I determine much of from beginning to end. Coming in only for the time needed to do it, no punch clock, no hours. Oh well. Let's just put the nose down to work. I may have some decaf.

I'm cooking up hardboiled eggs and am determined to use up the vegetables I bought the other day for a veg curry. They're outside keeping cool now.

You know, you were talking about the scale. I've decided it's just too much of a blow when I don't see the numbers fall so I'm simply not going to get on it. I know how I look. I know if there's been progress and in which direction. Even measurements I think are too painful. Sooo, I'm going to get a pair of pants and report on the progress there. It'll be funny to hear I'm sure because it'll say stuff like, rolls of fat hanging over waist, top button is 3 inches apart, absolutely NO way I can get them up past my knees. Ah yes, and likely these were pants I used to wear.

Grasshopper, I like your idea of rewards but I will have to think of something for those rewards along the way. With clothes I tend to think I have to have some fabulous looking thing that I don't want unless I look fabulous in my birthday suit. But I'm sure there are other clothes that I can still buy now and still wear later, a coat or something, underwear whatever. And then there must be other rewards too. OK, I will think on those.

Rice cheese? Never heard of that. Hmm. Wonder what it is. Will look it up. If American cheeses are so processed why not just buy some imported stuff? Would that help? I love cheese. Have to be careful I guess.

In addition to my sweet potato I was good in that walking back from the stable I had an apple! I had stick cheese and cashews too which is fatty but other than my usual oatmeal/raisin/wheat germ/soy milk breakfast I'd say that was pretty good. Hurrah for me!

Thanks guys for your help. I checked my email from my cell phone and could only read the first message, stormy's, but it made me feel a lot better.

Good things that happened today -- I used to keep a notebook of these just so I wouldn't forget them and moreso, because they're the things you immediately forget when something "bad" happens.

1. I had a good ride today, was actually praised by my teacher and that is extremely rare!
2. I helped an old man figure out how to use the fare adjustment machine at the train station.
3. I found a short line suddenly at the crowded supermarket (am I stretching this?!)

**********

I read that caffeine withdrawal does cause depression so I guess that's it. I still have coffee in the morning, but that's it and that's a drastic reduction from before. I have been having, since september, problems with my legs going totally numb. I am thinking the excessive caffeine and all the stress I was going through had a lot to do with that so I'm anxious to see how getting off the stuff will affect me there as well. I mean, I was off mega caffeine for a couple years and then just was so stressed and so insistent on getting to the gym and doing a kickass workout that I got back into the habit of wanting that jolt.

And stormy, tell me how the party went. I hope you had a great time!

Thanks again. Good luck to everyone. Hope to hear more from you all. It's lonely over here.

Good morning Redballoon - BF has been snoring for the past 3 hours - I finally just gave up and got out of bed! I'm glad the ride helped you. You've got two positives going on there, the exercise and being with an animal you love!! Mac won't let me ride him. He's a 65 pound australian shepard. I guess I can understand it :D But Maggie is much bigger - she could let me ride, just for a bit...... :lol: Anyway, I'm glad you got to spend some time with your horse. And congratulations on the healthy breakfast, not that your normal one isn't healthy, but it's hard to get healthy food on the run! As for the nuts....I swear I eat nuts all day long. They are high in fat, but it's the good fat that your body needs to function well. I eat a ton of raw cashews and almonds. The taste was funky at first but I'm use to it now and the cashews are actually sweet.

I like the pants Idea. I sort of so that. Right now my favorite jeans are suddenly baggy in the legs but still have the fat roll over the top...go figure. I have toothpick legs and arms but gain weight in my torso. Hips, back, chest, THEN stomach. It's an interesting pattern. The problem with it is though that I can't SEE the areas I'm losing weight a lot of times, because it's my back. Oters don't see it so readily so no one comments on it at all. I'll drop 20 pounds without anyone realizing it. I guess that's good, they don't seem to comment when I gain 20. Maybe I'm one of those people that don't look like I need the compliment. I'm NOT.

So I got this magazine yesterday all about living a simple, natural life. Articles like " A less is more holiday season." Every thing in it is horribly expensive!!!! Please explain to me when it became too expensive to live simply? I realize it's not, but if you want to be fashionable while you're simple it is :) :)

I made it throug yesterday without doing anything too drastic. I did put hot peppers in my guacamole, put that's something I can probably process pretty easily. OH - we were shopping last night for BF's food. I usually get mine on fridays because I go to an all organic shop near work...then we get his and anything leftover for the house. Well, last night we're roaming around and I ask the weekly "what do you want to eat this week" and he says he's going to eat whatever I EAT! So we got more veggies and more meat and he's ready to get started :) :) Wants to race again next year so he's got to start now getting his body ready. I'm considering it too. Mountain Bike races. I've never tried one - I could enter as a beginner and see how I do????

Okay, must get something done today. I still have two batches of soap to make and labels for the lemoncello to figure out. Plus laundry and doggie bathing......The good news is that I managed to lose 5 pounds this week - I'm going to change my ticker :) :) I really do need the scale, right now at least. I can't tell with my body - so I need something telling me I'm doing well.

I've rambled enough now - hope everyone is feeling better, and handling all the stresses that are popping up with ease!! Talk to you all soon!

Hi ladies,

Good afternoon to you all. I hope that every one is doing better today.

Red balloon, I know it must be hard coming off caffeine. I have seen my husband attempt to do so. He was very moody. I hope that you continue to resist it. It must be hard especially having to get up as early as you have to. Keep thinking positive. I like the list you wrote of what you did today, like helping the elderly person. It is good to write down positive things like that.

Little GH, it will be so exciting to buy a pair of jeans. How much weight do you have to lose to go down a size? I guess it varies with everyone. I am looking forward to wearing shorts this summer, that is what I aspire to do. Not short shorts, just shorts and feel comfy in them :D .

Crimegirl, I hope you are feeling better :cool: .

Well the party was fun last night. I learned :lol: a couple of line dances. I ate well lots of veggies. I did allow myself to have four small bites of my husband's fudge cake. It was so good! I am proud of myself for not eating more. Another challenge is ahead. I have another party in a couple of hours. I weighed myself for todays weigh in and I lost two pounds (despite the cake :^: ) Now I need to get through this party today :(

Friday night we rented Supersize Me. It is a documentary of obesity in America from poor eating habits. This one is about a guy who eats fast food every meal for a month. Pretty eye opening!

Moving the board to Battle of the Bulge #4-
Feel worse today-
will try to catch up on conversation tomorrow..
Hope you all are well..
Post how you are doing if you want me to update your weight...
Thanks

Here's the link to the new thread. Thanks, Crime girl, for starting it up. Hope you feel better real soon!!

Everyone, come on over!! :wave:

http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=50574