Kathy! May I suggest...Get rid of the cake! Can you give it to a neighbor or friend? I'm impressed you've made it so long with it in the house. I have ZERO self-control if I can get my hands on something like that. I'd have eaten the whole thing by now.

As for the therapy-- my mom has suggested the same thing for me since she thinks I'm depressed. (Hmm... is it a single/chubby girl thing?) It's probably a good idea, but I guess I have to be in a place where I'm willing to do the work needed to get past my issues. Personally I'd prefer it if someone else did it for me. I do have friends who have been to therapy and have gotten a lot out of it, for what it's worth.

Hope everyone has a fabulous week! Take care...

AHHH, Janet, I have but a quick second and wanted to read the posts adn yours grabbed me...my vet thinks Gracie has asthama too. He gave her a second pred. shot that should last 3-8 weeks adn I am to watch her breathing and give him a report if anything changes. I am of couse hoping it won't...and praying. That's so cute you named your kitty Paxil...is it b/c he calms your nerves or am I missing the real intent? I just love my kitty...I adopted her in April...she was a stray adn the vet thinks she is 1-2 years old. She is so loving and affectionate...unlike cats I knew of before. I have a dog who is 14 and they love each other. It's sweet! Gotta go for now...More later!

Debbie - Paxil's name was chosen because he makes me laugh and is my "antidepressant". Of course, his name has been shortened to Pax (which you may or may not know is latin for Peace), but he is the least peaceful cat I have ever had. He's a roudy little bugger. The prednisone is doing wonders for him. Of course, it stinks having to pill him every morning, but he is a forgiving sort. And there's really not much choice.

Kathy - I'm with SkinnyBoPeep - get rid of that cake. Whatever you do DO NOT EAT IT. Put it in the sink and run water on it. Is that any more of a waste than letting in eat away your control and dignity. BE STRONG!!

SkinnyBoPeep - Congratulations on your first 20! Isn't that feeling the most awsome? Keep it up and before you know it, you'll be on the last 20.

I have been doing really well as of late and am feeling cocky. People that didn't know I was trying to lose weight are starting to notice and make comments and that is such a motivator. I had to give up on my favorite jeans because they were too big, even after washing them in hot water. I'm starting to feel like I might actually succeed this time and it's kind of scary. When I lose the motivation, I try to remember why this is so important to me. Here are some of my reasons:
* I don't want to wonder if I pass some laughing teenagers on the street if it's me they are laughing at.
* I want to be able to buy clothes that look good, rather than having to settle for clothes that fit
* I want to run into an old friend I haven't seen in awhile and feel happy to see them rather than mortified that they saw me
* I want to live without fear: of turnstyles, theater seats and restaurant booths

Stop and think about what you want to accomplish. Then make it happen. We can all do this. And nothing worth having is easy. Stay strong. And have a good tomorrow.

Hey, Janet! A little tip for you as the compliments start to roll in... Write them down. I've lost weight before (a long story, but this is my second time at this) and I kept a few pages in my daily planner reserved for compliments. I know, it sounds conceited, but on those days when I thought I couldn't see the changes or I wasn't sure I could maintain my self-control, I'd go back and read them.

I would jot down the date, my current weight, who made the comment, and what they said. So it might just be one quick line: 10/18, 265, Jill, said I look wonderful!

As I dropped more and more weight, it was so nice to go back and remember how far I had come and how I changed. It served as great incentive too.

Now if only I went back to it and read it as I started to gain it back... Argh! Live and learn.

hey everyone! thanks for all the suggestions. i really don't want to throw it away because the one the cake was for is one person of the couple that is temporarily staying with me. they were up to the lake for the weekend and as i thought they were back today and had some of the cake. i too also finally had a piece tonite and i feel much better. it's funny like i said i should have just had the one piece to begin with and i wouldn't of ate myself thru house and home. i think my mental torture was worse than actually having that one piece. so the real question is why do i torture myself like that.

i didn't get any exercise in today unless i can count laying carpet pad down and moving some chairs to the shed. it sure felt like exercise. i go to a different dr. tomorrow to find out about my knee and back. i didn't like the first one at all. just didn't connect...he was trying to get me to diagnos myself????? i hope i have better luck.

skinnybopeep - that is a great tip to start a little compliment book. i think i will try that for when i get one. as for therapy, i think that you are correct with the chubby single (and almost 40 i might add) girl thing. i don't think i am ready for that just yet. i told mom i would keep it in mind though.

janet - i really miss having cats. i would never give up my molly dog though.i have always heard there is one pet in your life that your soul really connects with. i've had lots of pets and she's that soul connection. it's like when she looks at me she really understands me. it's all in her eyes. now if i only could find a man like that. any who.. i am glad you are doing well. don't look back and absorb those compliments like a sponge. forget the favorite jeans and adopt a new smaller pair. there a lot of homeless favorite jeans out there. give yourself a great big pat on the back.

well, i hope everyone has a happy tuesday! thank god monday is over!!
good nite! kathy

Hey all, just checking in. Just got home from having dinner out with a friend I used to work with. We planned on eating Italian, but the restaurant we chose was closed, so we ended up at a malt shop. That would have been a challenge, but it's only about 40 degrees and rainy outside now, so a malt didn't even sound good. Had a grilled chicken sandwich with fruit.

Thanks for the encouragement and suggestions. The idea of a compliment log is a good one - I'll start today. And SkinnyBoPeep, this is my second time too! I guess we lived up to the statistics that most people who lose weight don't keep it off. But not this time!!!

Have a good Wednesday and keep strong!

Hi everyone!

Well done, Janet on your malt shop encounter! That is such an accomplishment to have easy access to yummy treats and make healthy choices instead. Hooray for you!

I really did live up (or down) to the statistics for regaining weight. Argh. Even when I swore I wouldn’t. I thought I had figured it out with good eating, exercise, etc. But I still managed to gain back 110 or so of 120 pounds lost. I can’t let that happen again. So I’ve got to figure out how to cope with what comes after losing weight.

Also I reread your post where you listed out reasons for losing weight and I completely identified with ALL of them. My two short term reasons are that on a business trip in August I almost couldn’t buckle my seatbelt on the plane and would rather die in a crash or have my legs turn blue from lack of circulation than ask for an extender (okay that's extreme, but it was eye-opening mortification at it's worst). I’m flying again in November and vow to have “belt slack” this time! Also, I turn 33 in December and promised myself last year that I wouldn’t have another birthday where I weighed more than the year before.

Kathy--Homeless favorite jeans! Like my Prince Charming I know there are fabulous jeans out there wondering where the heck I am… I’m coming for you, my denim friends, hold on!

Happy Wednesday from soggy California!! Remember to make good choices!

Hello all! I'm back from vacation at last. I was in the Bahamas for 5 days, then home a day (my "Day of Rest and Laundry") and then off for another several days to visit friends in Delaware. Now back home and back to work (phooey!) and getting back into my usual routine (always difficult after a vacation and even more difficult when you are trying to lose weight, I think!).

I gained 1.4 pounds after 5 days in Bahamas because I was eating out every meal and had dessert most nights (minimal amounts, but still, something I'm definitely not accustomed to in my daily routine). I was actually pretty pleased with that small a weight gain with all that eating out. But the even better news is that I was SHOCKED to find that, when I returned from Delaware, I'd actually lost a little of the weight I gained in the Bahamas! So my net gain for the entire vacation was only 1/2 to 3/4 of a pound! Yeehaw!

Now comes the work of getting back into the daily exercise habit and watching that snacking after being on vacation so long! Ick.

Congrats to all on your weight loss victories!! I've been plateauing for most of the past 2 months so I don't have much in the way of successes to report.

Hi everyone,

SkinnyBoPeep - I am so with you on those airplane seats! I don't travel much and having grown up in a large family, we never could aford "flying" vacations, so I don't have much opportunity to fly. But my company sent me to Los Angeles two years ago and I was terrified. Not because it was my first time travelling alone and I was flying into LAX, not because I was afraid of the plane crashing, but because I was afraid I would get on the plane and 1) not fit into the seat and 2) not being able to buckle the belt. Then what? Do they escourt you off? The plane was packed and there were no extra seats. I worried for weeks before and starved myself. Luckily all the worse case scenarios never came to pass, but it was a very tight fit. So instead of a time in my life that should have been exciting, it was all overshadowed by this excess weight. Which is really sad.

SheriVa - welcome back! And you should pat yourself on the back for the minimal weightloss on vacation. So it's not a loss, but sometimes all we can do is minimize the gain. Good job...

Kathy - I decided to keep the favorite jeans. Those are going to be the ones that I going to keep to remind me how far I have come and remind me I don't want to be ther EVER again.

Well, I hope you are all doing well, and I'll try to check in tomorrow (weigh in day)

Hi girls, things have picked up I see adn I gotta get busy and catch up. Reading about all the success yall are having really lifts me up .
Sheria, that is incredible that you gained so little on a vacation like that! You should be very proud actually. I would expect I'd come back a whole lot worse off.

I have decided to take things to the next level and go to my doc tomorrow and ask for drugs. A friend of mine is taking laxipro or however you spell that for anxiety and depression and says it really helps. I think this is one of those times in my live when I need a helping hand. I think it will be easier to stick to a food plan and exercise while on it too. I stress eat so much these days. I just stand at the kitchen counter and stuff my face. I noticed tonight, I don't even bother to fix a plate and sit down and enjoy a meal. I just eat standing by the microwave and fridge. It often is unhealthy food and turns into a binge. I know I've gotta get a handle on it. I like the AA advice, Janet. So, this is my baby step...once I feel more in contol and less anxious about EVERYTHING I think I will have the control to go back on plan. That's my plan for now anyway. I'm ready for some good vibes. Anybody wanna drink to that?

CorningKat, I have considered therapy as of late too. I just feel so bogged down and stressed lately and thought it might help to talk it out in a strangers office. I'm gonna ask for the drugs first I think...but if that doesn't work, believe me, I'll be right there with you! And as for the cake, just so you know, I'd have done exactly what you did and then gave in and ate the cake too,. that stuff just makes me crazy till it's out of the house. Being single is a perk in that respect. I'd never have any hope if someone else lived me and junk food was always around.

Janet, I liked you list and it would be so nice to buy really cool, fashionable clothes that show off my good taste, rather than clothes that just fit. I feel stressed every night going to bed trying to figure out what to wear the next day, based on what fits, not what is cute! I hate it!

Oh and for those of you that were talking about losing before adn gaining back, Me too! I lost 5olbs in 1990 and gained it back in 1997-98. And now, then some! I read a book recently, called "Passing for Thin" anyone read it? It's kinda exactly about what yall mentioned...what to do adn how to feel once you've lost the weight..a terrific woman's actual journey and diary. I can't remember her name..it's at the library tho...it's worth checking out. It was very eye opening.

Gotta say good nite ladies...have a great thursday!
Skinnybopeep, I like that idea of the compliments log too. I had forgotten it, but I did that once several years ago and it does feel so good to read it as you are losing and it does help you make it thru ruff times. I'm gonna start one again too!

I have already pre-ordered it in paperback which, unfortunately, doesn't come out until the end of the year. I very much look forward to reading it, as I have heard nothing but good things. Reading "Thin for Life" by Anne Fletcher toward the beginning of my journey last fall was really helpful and I think that reading "Passing for Thin" will be very helpful in keeping me on course in the last half of my weight loss effort.

Thanks all for the nice comments on holding down vacation weight gain. I never expect to lose weight on a vacation but it sure is nice not to gain too much! Especially when you are over 50 and every pound is such a struggle to lose.

Hi Everyone. I am back from being away for a long time. I'm not sure what direction my life is going but I'm realizing how important it is to be connected to people and have support. I don't have regular access to the internet at home anymore so it limits my time on sites like these. I hope to get back in though and be able to catch up with everyone and get to know the new people.

Have a good night and I'll be back tomorrow.

we having a party!!! hello everyone!! it's great to see so many people here!

ang - we miss you!!! hope you can visit regularly!!

sheriava - what a great job you did on vacation! i actually do better myself when i'm on vacation. i think it's because i'm busy and happy and relaxed. also i am away from the comforts of home. it kind of breaks up the routine.

holli's human - i thought about the drug route myself, but i'm one of those that won't take something unless it's a last resort. i won't even take tylenol unless my head is going to explode. my other hangup is i've read where antidepressants are addicting. that makes me nervous. my dr. just put me on anti-inflamitories and muscle relaxers...and insists i take them before i start physical therapy.

janetg - i worry about something similar. my company has an amusement park picnic every summer. i love the rides, but i get so paranoid a month before that i won't fit in the seats or be over the weight limit. i usually just make it.

well, as i was saying above the dr. thinks i have carpal tunnel and doesn't know what's wrong with the knee, except there is fluid built up in it. we're gonna work on those two problems before we start on the back again. she is sending me in for an overhaul at physical therapy. my friend goes to the place where i signed up and she says they're wonderful. she say they really motivate her to get moving. so maybe that will be the kick in the pants i need to get back on track.

is that book you mentioned by anne fletcher too?? i've read her other books. i'll have to put that on my reading list.

well, i'm getting tired and i want to watch my soap and oprah yet. i hope everyone has a good friday!
kathy

Hi gals!

I had a tough day in terms of feeling like my efforts aren't producing results. It's frustrating to be working so hard and hardly see the scale budge! It just doesn't seem to be coming off at the same rate as it did the last time I lost it. It's like my body is rebelling. Despite being discouraged, I didn't run to the kitchen. Instead I pouted/moped most of the evening, then feeling disgusted with myself hopped on the ellipse. I'm sure tomorrow will feel better.

Enough of my pity party...

Kathy-- sorry to hear you're experiencing such aches and pains! I'll cross my fingers that the PT is just what you need to give you a jumpstart!

Hey Janet-- How was the weigh in day?? I'm sending good vibes your way that it went well!!

Debbie-- Nice to meet you! I am a total stress eater too, so I feel your pain. Let us know how the drug thing goes. My mom keeps bringing it up so I'm interested to know if they help. I heard about Pasinng for Thin but didn't read it. I'll have to pick up a copy...

SheriVA-- Nice to meet you too! While it's comforting to know I'm not alone in this plateau thing, I wish we were having an easier time of it... Cool vacation!!

Ang-- You're so right about connecting with others. This journey is far to dificult to face alone. It looks like you have made great progress! Keep up the good work!

Well, all the exclamations points are cheering me up... Thanks for letting me unload. TGIF!!!!!!

Since I have a hard time remembering everyone's initial story (and am not even sure I read one for all of you), it would be helpful if we could all summarize what our weight loss and exercise strategy or philosophy is (and whatever personal history you want to add).

Me in brief: I am 52, never married, and live in the Washington, DC suburbs. I've had a weight problem from my teens on up, and just kept getting larger as the years went on, supposedly from that lovely cycle of dieting and gaining back (plus), rinse and repeat.

My philosophy: I have come to realize that I failed for years at losing weight because I always tried to be too strict about my eating--you know The "You Can't Have That!" Syndrome. My weight loss philosphy for the past 15 months or so has been healthy eating and exercise but with the proviso "Everything in moderation." In other words, when I feel like I HAVE to have a cookie, and I try having something "good" in substitute but am still obsessing about it the next day, then I go buy a cookie. One cookie. Over and out. Obviously, that can't be every day, so I look on it as a special treat. Same thing when the french fries are calling my name, etc. Nothing is off my list forever. BTW, I define "healthy eating" as a low fat, low calorie menu that includes lots of fresh fruits and veggies, lots of water, adequate protein and fiber and complex carbs (whole wheat bread/pasta/tortilla vs. white, brown rice vs. white, etc.). Because I'm a chocolaholic, I have one bite-sized dark chocolate Dove Promise every day. I'm sure I could lose faster without it, but life would not be nearly as enjoyable.

Now, how about you?