Hey Ladies

I have been off my diet for the last week and a bit...I am just eating everything and not caring so this week I am back on plan...dont know exactly what happened but after I got back from New York..I never got back to my habitual plan..so I am back...I am up a few pounds to 166 but I am bloated ...PMS so I am not worried I have gained but I most certainly have ot lost a pound since NYC...so I want to be losing again.

Miki...I hope things are going better for you...maybe some couples councelling is something you might be interested in or even individual counselling...someone to hear your thoughts. Let us know how you are doing when you get the chance

Meal Plan for today
breakfast: carnation breakfast with skim milk
lunch: smoked salmon with salad
dinner: chili con carne
snacks: none
beverages: tea, water and diet soda

exercise: pilates and I walked to work

Have a great day

Cyan

Hello Everyone,

Glad to be back to posting. Got a virus last week and tried to work through it all. Man I have been having a really hard time lately!! It seems my immune system is shot. Enough about me--Miki I am so sorry to hear about your difficult situation with your husband. It looks like you are working towards a resolution through all the hardship. It is okay to vent here and let out your feelings and use some of our shoulders to lean on. We are a pretty compassionate bunch here who have all been through tuff stuff--and what you are going through is hard. Remember though that it is not your fault. It is important not to blame yourself for it all as it wasn't your actions.

Cyan, sounds like you are staying on track well. Keep up the great work!!

Lisa--congratulations on your weight loss!!

Newie-looking forward to hearing more from you soon!!

Well, not much is new. Same old routine of getting a bit of biking and a bit of baseball in each week. Could do a bit more exercise and eat a bit better but have to get my overall health on track.

TTL
Cjunk

Hi, everyone--I finally had a chance to read the posts and get some extra time set aside to actually reply to everyone. During the last week, hubby was on vacation. That has its pluses and minuses. It's good to get a few extra projects done, but I can't follow the routine I normally do, so that is unsettling.

I've also been shuttling my older daughter back and forth to the high school she plans to attend in a year (where I taught years ago) to summer camps for middle school kids. She was in art camp two weeks ago, marching band camp last week, and regular band camp this week. The school is about 35 minutes from our house, so if the camp lasted 4 hours a day, I could go back home and get some things done, but these last two camps are 2 hours a day, so I end up trying to kill time waiting for her. I usually go shopping and end up buying stuff--not frivolous stuff, but I'm spending money just the same.

Last week I also started my yearly bingo operator stint at the school where my kids go and I teach. That will be every Wednesday in the months of July and August. Basically, I am legally in charge of the whole operation. I have parents from the school helping, and another operator with me, but I am in charge. My kids, with hubby's help, are running the concession stand there, and hubby is acting as "security"--a strong looking man around to inhibit misbehavior and help me close up the school and take the proceeds to the bank after the night is finished. It's very tiring work--usually the next day I really have no energy to do anything.

I've also been working on planning for the next school year. That involves organizing materials, planning lessons, cleaning out my basement and home office for items I may be able to use for school. I've also been buying secondhand books from thrift stores and E-Bay to compile a classroom library.

And I've also been working on my yard and house--generally getting stuff done. So, that's why I've not been around. Hopefully I can get here on a more regular basis.

Miki, I was so sad to learn of the problems you've been having in your marriage. I've never experienced the hurt of knowing my husband was involved with someone else--to me that would be such a devastating thing to happen that would be incredibly difficult to get over--but I have experienced a severe threat to our marriage and relationship, and we have areas which need ongoing attention to keep us strong. Early in my marriage, after my older daughter was born--John and I were separated for a short time. I had a severe OCD attack, and he just couldn't deal with it. He wanted me to just shake it off, and I couldn't. The situation brought to a head other issues that were problems for us--in particular, the fact that we were both children of alcoholics, which had brought a certain dysfunction into the relationship from day one--which included communication problems, trust and control issues, anger issues (we've had to deal with both verbal and physical violence in our relationship), in-law difficulties--actually difficulties in every area of our life together. We ultimately sought counseling. For a while we both went, but then I went by myself. That might be a help to you, whether you and hubby go together, or you go on your own. My experience was that a crisis really brings to a head issues that were present in the relationship along, and it really helped us to deal with some of those issues. It wasn't a cure-all. We still have to deal with so many issues every day, and it can be very rough, especially with some of the unemployment/financial issues we've gone through. My hubby finally agreed to see our family doctor about his anger issue and has been on a low dose of prozac for a couple of years, which has helped him immensely--I believed he was mildly depressed, and he only knew how to express emotion through anger. And I've worked very hard on my OCD. And we're both committed to being together forever--that is probably the most important part. There is ongoing communication between us--not always easy--but it has been the key to helping us live out our commitment. I'm also learning never to be complacent about the relationship. Every now and then I get this thought that things are going very well and smoothly for us--almost overconfident in my thinking--and usually it isn't too long before something comes up that we have to deal with. That happened to us about two weeks ago. We fought a whole day about trivia, I think, but we ended up going out together during the evening to talk away from the kids, because we both had a lot of stuff built up that hadn't been talked about. Anyway, I'm babbling here, but I wanted you to know how much I feel for you in what you are going through, but that I believe you guys CAN get through this crisis, and over time perhaps even be stronger, though it may not seem like it right now.

I would also suggest, Miki, that you be very kind and gentle to yourself right now. You are very wounded and need lots of care. Do good things for yourself--even a bubble bath or a shower with pretty smelling bath gel can do wonders for your self esteem. Get a haircut or style if that makes you feel good. Get some exercise to relieve stress. Find something you can do that makes you feel good--whether it's reading, needlework, gardening, or some other hobby. And don't force yourself to heal faster than you can. Also, prayer for yourself, for your marriage, and for your hubby (VERY hard to do when you are very angry at him and what he's done) can bring you tremendous strength. Anyway, I will keep you both in my prayers.

Cyan--I've experienced the step away from the food plan on a vacation and the difficulty getting back on. It's a rough one, but hang in there.

Cjunk--it's great to hear from you. Glad your computer problems seem to be worked out.

As far as food goes, I'm holding my own. I've not lost or gained any weight. My cravings are down because I am not being overly restricted in what I allow myself to eat, but I am eating smaller portions, and eliminating things that seem to bloat me or make me want to lose control. We'll see. Exercise is rather inconsistent, but I am doing lots of physical work around the house.

Well, I'm going to get going now. I've written more than enough to make up for my weeklong absence. Take care, girls. Bye for now.

Thanks everyone for the kind words of support. I am thankful for the friendship I have with all of you. I am hanging in there, and honestly altho it's going to take lots of time and work, I am already able to see a light at the end of the tunnel. I have no doubt right now that in the end, we'll end up with a stronger marriage than ever before. We are both working on that and I am convinced it's what we both want.

You know whats crazy? and also what made a huge impact on him...It was that when this came out, my thought was "Oh my god, is he going to leave me or is he going to stay?" Now, anyone who knows me would know that is NOT what would have been expected...even I didnt expect it! I would have thought I'd have kicked him straight out the door yet that thought never even entered my mind. You know until he actually made the comment how surprised he had been at my reaction I had not even realized that I had the decision whether or not I kept my marriage. That is how much I love him...even this drastic mistake has not lessoned what I feel in my heart for my husband or caused me to want to end the marriage. He honestly thought I would never in a million years let him stay yet I never even considered the option of doing otherwise! He said it definitely made him stop and think "wow...she was willing to do that for me".

Going through this has been ****, I wont make it sound any better than it is...yet through it all, it has confirmed how strong my feelings are for him. Hard for me to even understand myself. Anyway, I believe with hard work and lots of prayers, we are going to make it and come out stronger than ever before.

Thanks again for everyone's thoughts, prayers and support. I'll check again soon. (by the way, I am still doing great at my eating...one positive thing from all this)

Hey Gals

Still chugging along...not doing very well with the diet lately...I somehow lost the motivation or I am feeling comfortable at my current weight which is not the weight I want to be but for some reason I have not been motivated to move off this number.

Hey Miki...hang in there...its seems like you are working through your situation for lack of a better word. Let us know how you are doing emotionally.

Hey Cjunk ... looks like you are keeping active and doing your "thang" good on you. I need some of your exercise mojo....to get me back to losing weight.

Newie...looks like you are keeping busy as well...good to read that.

Well I sure do hope to get out of this mental slump I find myself in...on the good side...I just had an amazing lunch...grilled chicken breast with peppers, feta cheese and mole sauce...oh man...soooooo good...made it myself...mole sauce was from a bottle though

Meal plan for today
breakfast: all bran with milk and tangerine
lunch: grilled chicken breast with peppers, feta and mole sauce
dinner: citrus chipolte shrimp with whole wheat pasta
snacks: yogurt
beverages: tea, water and diet

exercise: walked to work..thinking about walking home and hopefully pilates tonight

have a great day

Cyan

I did better yesterday with my food and exercising. Tom is here so I think some of the craziness is gone.

I didnt walk to work this morning because of rain so I might hoof it home or if I dont walk I will have to cycle tonight.

Meal Plan for today
breakfast: carnation breakfast with skim milk
lunch: two burritos...small homemade on whole wheat
dinner: grilled bbq salmon steak with roasted peppers
snacks: yogurt and applesauce
beverages: water, tea and diet cola

exercise: walking and pilates

Have a great day

Cyan

Hi ladies,

Sorry I have been MIA for so long...busy at the lake house, kids home for the summer, life in general....

Miki, sorry to hear about the problems at home...a few years back I was in a situation that was on the brink of divorce...until you are in the situation you do not know how you would react. My hubby and I went through years of marriage counseling and probably could use years more...but it comes down to a few things...at least for me...he is a very good father and my kids would be crushed if we divorced, he is my best friend in many ways, we have a history together, no partner is perfect...the honeymoon does not last...some times it is times like these that casue real change in our lives...a fork in the road of life ....I will send you lots of love...please e-mail me if you need to talk.

Cyan, I am so happy to see that you are still posting your menus and losing weight!
CJ, Newie, Lisa, I will post more when I get the chance.

Weight update from me is not good...Gained back everything I lost a few years ago. I am back to 139 from a low of 125...Need to stop the junk food, start the exercising, get a plan and stick to it.

Hi, girls--thought I'd have a visit with you tonight--nothing really exciting going on here--yesterday I finished taking my daughter to her music camps--40 minutes driving each way, waiting 2 hours, then 40 minutes back--yuck!! Talk about having your day taken from you. By the time I got to the last few days, I was taking paperwork in the car with me. I actually got sick of shopping--not getting paid this summer, so I was concerned about the budget as well. Hubby and I went to the doctor this week for check-ups, new prescriptions, etc. I've gained 4 pounds since December--I knew that, but didn't like to think about it. I told him I haven't been exercising--he told me it was really important, and that I should. Two of the last three days I have walked. I'm pretty good at following doctor's orders, so I'll be getting started with my regular routine again. It will be good for my mood too. The OCD has started bothering me again, so the doc recommended that I increase my medication to the level I was at before hubby lost his insurance in October. I decreased my dose for economic reasons, and I have never been able to be at the dose I've been on and feel good for an extended period of time. I also started the generic brand of prozac, also for money reasons, and I felt the difference. Anyway, I've been taking this med for so many years--7, I think--that I can work with it, and adjust the dose (I have two pills of the same ingredient, only different doses, and I am able to make very slight adjustments over an extended period to take as little as possible to feel as good as possible.) and report to the doctor what I'm doing and how I'm feeling. I'm to have blood work tomorrow--have my thyroid level checked, among other things. I'll see him back in a month--I've been very tired, so he wants to see if my thyroid hormone dosage needs adjustment. Hubby is having blood work too. He has to have his blood drawn with him lying flat for 15 minutes, because he faints--I've seen it, and it's not pretty. (And they say women are the weaker sex! Right! I walk in, they poke me, take 4 vials, and I'm out of there!) Anyway, I've been receiving some of the books I bought through e-bay. I've read 4 of them in the last week. I'm on #5 now. I like these kids' books. Most of them were written after my time.

Cyan, I feel for you with your lack of motivation. I wish I was as motivated as I was last summer. I ate a lot of the Atkins shakes and meal bars back then because of the limitations of the diet, and now I just want to eat regular food, but in a combination that will help me lose and not make me feel deprived. Doc told me to eat lots of veggies and fruits. I'm trying.

Miki, you're on my mind a lot. Hang in there. You'll make it. You know, they say that being married is really the hardest lifestyle choice. There is so much to living out that commitment. It'll be worth it in the long run, despite the pain now.

Debee--it was good to hear from you. I'd wondered how you were doing.

Well, ladies, I'm off to surf somewhere on this web. It helps me get out of my mind. Family is watching TV. Girls are watching "Hope and Faith." I can only take so much of Kelly Ripa. Hubby is tolerating it so he can watch racing shortly. Take care, all. Have a good weekend.

Hey Ladies

Debee...sounds like you are having a nice time at the lake house. Sorry to hear that you are back up to 139. Hoping you get motivated again to lose those extra few pounds.

Newie...I am sure being without a paycheck for the summer is hard...it would worry me too to see money going out and none coming back in. Hang in there...before you know it, summer will be over and fall at your doorstep. Enjoy the summer while its here.

I have been plateauing at the same wheight for the month of July end of June..so its been about 4 months. So I am hoping that this week is the week to get off this plateau

Meal plan for today
Breakfast: carnation breakfast with skim milk
lunch: lean cuisine chicken dish
dinner: chili con carne
snacks: banana and yogurt
beverages: tea, water, diet cola and chrystal light

exercise:walked to work and pilates

Have a great day ladies

Cyan

Hello All,

Here I am again, except this time I have to say that I have gained a few pounds lately and my butt has gotten bigger! A new medication that I am taking for my low levels has weight gain as a side effect and I am feeling it!! I haven't been eating healthy either. Last week I realized that I have had a summer of burgers, potatoe salads and hot dogs as well as munchies. Definitely not healthy. So the good news is that I should be able to tackle this problem with some discipline in cutting out the junk. Hopefully that will take care of the few pounds extra. If not, I will move to more stringent measures. I have baseball this week. Last week was one heck of a workout where I ran non-stop the whole game as I played Rover position and the batters were opposite batters each time. Practiced batting on the weekend and also went rollerblading and swimming. Kind of low-key on the aerobics side though.

Miki-sounds like you have a positive attitude and your head in the right direction.

Newie-It doesn't sound like a relaxing summer yet at all! In fact I get stressed out reading your activities!! I think you need to lay low for at least a few days and tell yourself it is okay to do absolutely NOTHING!!

Debee-Welcome back! I can say that I am probably in the low 140's in weight and normally 125-128 so I am missing my size 7 clothing right now. I hate the tummy bloated feeling!! Maybe you and I can cut the junk food together!!

Cyan-You are great for getting back on track with your diet. I admire your discipline. I don't think I could function on such little food each day. I eat like a horse!! I guess I have to learn to cut back and get my stomach to shrink.

Gotta get rid of my addiction to butter chicken! We have an Indian restaraunt down the street that makes the best butter chicken I have ever had. I will really miss that chicken....:(

Ah well,

More from me later.

Cjunk (and not eat it!)

Hi, girls! Great to read the posts tonight. Just to let everyone know--I am going to try the low-carb stuff again. I've been watching the weight come on, and I think it's the amount of carbs I've been eating, even though most of them are healthy grains and fruits. And yesterday, I ate a Kashi Good Friends cereal with blueberries for breakfast, and in about 2 hours I got very shaky and scared. I thought it was an anxiety attack, but it felt more severe. I decided to eat a peanut butter sandwich and half a donut, and within about 10 minutes I was better. I think the high carb/low protein breakfast caused me to get hypoglycemic. Anyway, that plus the scale trying to go up another pound and me not really eating much junk or large quantities of anything just sealed it for me. So I went out this morning--walked first with my daughter. We talk about growing up and stuff like that when we walk, as well as a little of what it feels like for me at my time of life. Then we went to the grocery store, and I got a few things that are helpful to me on a low-carb diet--some Atkins breakfast cereal, because I really like having cereal before bed at night, Atkins shake mix--I can make 13 shakes, which are really snacks, for the price of about 5 or 6 ready made canned ones--a multivitamin for people living on a low carb plan, metamucil so I can head off constipation, low-carb yogurt because I can't eat eggs, and I need some variety, and natural peanut butter, because it has no sugar, and I eat smaller portions of it because it isn't as sweet. I can't do induction exactly because of the egg and cereal thing, but I am giving up all other grains. I will eat some blueberries until I finish what is in my refrigerator, but those are low-carb. I just can't stand the thought that I'm starting to gain. I really don't want that to happen. From what I'm reading, it sounds like most of us are at similar places. Let's hang in there, ladies.

Cjunk, believe it or not, the pace I described is considerably slower than the one I maintain during the school year. To hear another person tell me that my "slow" summer pace isn't slow at all is actually scary. I will say that I want to move at a slower pace than that, and now that those band/art camps are over, I should be able to do so most of the time, except on bingo day--Wednesdays. I think I am finding some resistance from my hubby. I don't know if he really grasps how much I need to rest!!! I told him tonight that I kind of feel burnt out, and I get mad whenever someone wants me to do something I don't feel like doing. I find myself often saying, "No, I don't want to do that now. I want to do what I want to do." I know I can't be completely selfish. (Wouldn't it be nice, though?) I am trying to get a balance of rest, progress on home projects, and progress on school work. I think he feels I am not making enough progress on the home projects. But I'm not giving in. I know I need this, and that I and everyone else will be glad I did in the near future. I also put my foot down about my girls helping me around the house, and I gave each of them a list of chores that they have been fighting me about for some time and said they have to do them. I've been also angry because their help has often been halfways at best and that much with considerable resistance.

Cyan, just hang in there with your plateau. You've been doing so well over the last few months. You too, Debee. This is just one of those periodic struggles we go through. As I read all of your posts tonight, I find it interesting how we seem to go through cycles of success and struggle--thankfully we've found each other to get us through the difficult times and to congratulate us when we're succeeding. Miki, I'm thinking of you. I hope each day is getting better for you.

Well, I'm off to another site--vegging out on this web tonight. Take care, ladies. See you soon. :) :)

Hey Ladies

I did really well yesterday..I just read my previous post and I said I was on a plateau for 4 months...I meant 4 WEEKS...anyway...I walked to work and back home yesterday..I also stopped off at Provigo and bought some fresh salmon which I baked in the oven ..it turned out delicious..I had it with a chickpea, spinach, tomato and onion salad...drizzled with a bit of olive oil. Oh so good. I also did Pilates...just a little but I worked out my lower back and stomach and legs.

I got on the scale last night after walking home and it read 163.5...that is a first...to weight that in the evening..so I think I might see 162 by friday and I am feeling good about reaching 160 by july 31...I set this mini goal for myself...I have a friend's wedding to go to and I want to be 160 by then...that one week and 4 days..wish me luck.

Meal Plan for today
Breakfast: peanut butter reduced on whole wheat
lunch: leftovers...salmon and chickpea salad
dinner: leftovers..chili con carne
snacks: yogurt, small banana and maybe ice cream
beverages: water. tea. diet cola and crystal light

exercise: walk to work and I think I will walk on home...pilates

Oh I have been using metamucil for fiber therapy...and let me tell you ladies...I am so regular it feels so good...so I recommend it to anyone who needs extra fiber in their diet like I do...I have one teaspoon of the smooth texture sugarless orange flavored metamucil and it rocks. It says on the bottle it can be used regularly for those who dont get enough fiber in their diet..thats me..so I am taking it.

Hey Cjunk...at least you are getting this anemia thing under control and you will feel better soon. I know what you mean about eating junk food...love it love it love it. When I went to NYC, I was eating more but I was walking tons..but when I got back, I continued to eat 1600 to 2000 calories for a period of 4 weeks...I am very lucky I didnt gain any weight but I sure didnt lose a pound either. so now I am down to about 1300 to 1500 calories and hopefully I would like to cap off at 1400. we shall see.

Newie I know what you mean about being frustrated with gaining weight especially when we have been working so hard at losing. Its funny how a few days of eating off plan can play havoc with our bodies. I hear ya and I am hanging in there along with you. Good luck with the low carb diet and keep us posted.

Have a great rest of day ladies

Cyan

Hi, ladies--I'm on early today. Today's bingo day. I'm feeling so much better than I've been feeling. I am sure that the increase in medication I started last Friday is a factor. Also, I've had the opportunity to talk with a good friend about how my OCD has been affecting me lately. I don't share that with too many people because it's so hard to relate to if you don't have it. Her daughter has it, so she is more receptive than the average person to listening to details. Anyway, I have a better sense of well being, have more energy, am sleeping better, am more motivated--just feeling better in general--a BIG difference from how I was.

I'm starting on Day 3 of my low carb plan. I haven't lost anything, although I am releasing tons of fluid. It seems I am in the bathroom very often. I use metamucil when I eat low carb, Cyan, because I can't eat the high fiber cereals I usually eat because the carb levels are too high. Also, I'm trying to get rid of cravings, so I'm staying away from grains as much as possible. It does help, though I need to use more for my system than the once a day dose recommended. I'm probably not losing yet because I can't do the strict induction Atkins recommends at the beginning. I'm probably eating 40-45 grams of carbs daily, rather than the 20 recommended. However, that's considerably lower than the 200+ grams I was eating before. I am usually pretty satisfied, and I know I'm eating less. Anyway, we'll see. I worked in the yard 4 hours yesterday, so that was my exercise. I don't know if I'll walk today because it's very hot and humid, and the air is bad. But bingo will burn a lot of calories. I basically am on my feet running around for 9 hours straight.

Well, I'm out of things to talk about this morning. I will be back soon. Take care, all. Bye for now.

Hello Ladies

Hey Newie...good to hear that you are feeling better. And before you know it you will see the scale move down. Just stick to you plan. You are probably doing more of a southbeach diet which I think is better for you anyway, it allows you more options. Yes I love metamucil...I am good with one a day therapy. works for me LOL

Anyway, I walked to work yesterday but didnt find the energy to walk home...so hot and humid...I should do it tonight but its hotter than the devil's drawers..so we shall see what happens

Food wise was not so hot yesterday..I would up eating too much...as usual...I start the day really well and my dinner time, it all goes south and I over eat...I guess stress is very high at home especially when my mother is being aggressive and loud and wont let me relax a little...I notice on days like that..which are becoming almost everyday, I eat a lot more...junk food...carbs really.

So Meal plan for today
breakfast: carnation breakfast with skim milk and metamucil
lunch: smoked salmon with low fat cream cheese on french bread and green grapes and stuffed green olives
dinner: oven bakes trout with carrots
snack: yogurt and 1/2 cup of ice cream
beverages: diet cola, water. tea and coffee

exercise: walked to work..hopefully walk home and pilates or cycling

Have a great day

Cyan

Ok, the past few eeks have been so bad...here is an example of the junk I have been eating...

breakfast--half of an apple pie! I kept picking a it and iwthin an hour I ate half of it! Three cups of coffee 8-1p.m.

Lunch -took the kids to a tex-mex resturant and had nachos and salsa, a chicken and beef hard taco,

Dinner- went to the mall with kids and hubby and had a kids meal at Chick-a-fil, diet coke, waffle fries and 5 chicken nuggets, and a few spoonfuls of a hot fudge sundae

Snack - a small bag of fritos and about ten pringles....

Ok so I need to understand how to stop...heres my plan

1. No more going out to eat lunch instead have my turkey pita.

2. Eat a real breakfast (egg white omelet)

3. Plan a real dinner with chicken, veggies...cut out bread

4. Do not buy the junk food and have it at home...no pie, fritos, pringles, find some healthy snacks for me and the kids

5. Exercise..walk more do yoga again, start using he rowboat,


I also need a goal ..a special date to work towards...maybe the first day of school which is 8/26. I am 140 now and will try to lose 15 pounds in 5 weeks ...4 the first week with adkins, 3 the second week with adkins and then 2 pounds the following weeks just cutting out bread, junk food, sugar.