I'm back. Took a firm stock of what's working and what's NOT working at the moment, (more of the NOT than anything else!) and decided to call today, "Fresh Start Wednesday." Actually, it's one month to my birthday, and I realized that I was NOT going to hit the goal that I had set for myself for that day unless I get things back under control! Not sure how/why I let things start to slide, but slid they did! Will wait for official WI number from tomorrow, but I'm up about 3-4# from the number on my ticker. I believe it was Arabella* who was discussing, several posts back, "emotional obesity..." I get myself this close to a number that signifies a major change for me, aaaaaaaaaaaaaaand: backslide.
*Speaking of Arabella reminded me to check Amazon for copy of 'the Gabriel Method,' which I just did (see how I get side-tracked?) and then I figured I'll just bop on over to Barnes&Noble instead, (side track #2) when it occurred to me to CALL FIRST to check availability, and..... Of course it's not in stock, but they are ordering it for me. It'll be in store in 2-3 days, so for same price and less time... I'll have it before the weekend! ALTHOUGH, this does mean that I will be adding to my insanely ridiculous stack of diet books. I piled them up in the garage when I was preparing for my garage sale and then couldn't bring myself to put them outside for fear of judgement by complete strangers about the absurd amount of diet books I have and apparently didn't read. For the record, there are 15 books in the garage and 3 that made the cut and are still at my bedside... (another sidetrack: I just run out to count them!) I won't even get started on the dvds, videos and various pieces of exercise equipment gathering dust over here! Oh, yes... EMOTIONAL OBESITY I have in spades!
Anyway, upon review of what works and what doesn't, I noticed that the amount of time spent (or not spent) here is directly proportional to compliance in the healthy habits dept. When I'm 'in the zone,' and doing well, I'm here WAY more than when the slacking takes hold... SO, I guess it's a good sign that I'm here and haven't stopped typing, despite more than a few attempts at self-derailment!
Without further ado...and that's a lot of ado up there... I am declaring Fresh Start Wednesday a near-success! I have managed to, so far: eat well, drink lots of water, dust off the cobwebs in my palace suite, and am heading outside shortly for a good, long walk. I have, despite the spell of slack, managed to get my walks in. Last Saturday I even completed a 10 mile training walk! I have intentions of doing so again this Saturday, but just found out that there is a 5k walk for Scleroderma that we try to do each year for my cousin... Can I manage both? Sore feet post-10miler last week say "No," but I think I can swing it. Will see... definitely one or the other, if not both.
DS is hovering madly... I have held him at bay for at least 2 hours, while trying to complete this post. I fear I can hold him no longer!! Quickies: wsw for 35 lbs gone! Arabella: So psyched for bootcamp for you! V. jealous! Anagram: My own P of P&Tis starting to shape up and I think of you when I'm partaking of the P&T! Andria! So glad to see you back in the Palace! School's almost out for my baby, too! Graduation 6/24! to Kaylets, ceara, Janga... I hope I haven't missed anyone! Hi lurkers, too!
Okay, I'm out. But I shall return... I do feel better having gotten all that off my chest! (that doesn't even include the post that I *poofed* before this one!) Have a great night, one and all!
anagram- glad to hear you enjoyed recent lunch with family and singles dinner. hoping you get a whoosh soon. all your hard work of hanging in will pay off! muggy here now too. sure miss the all too brief period here where humidity was low.
kat-good to see you! sure can relate to having lot of diet books, tapes, etc. that i have gotten over the years and to not wanting put out old diet books at a garage sale for fear of judgement by complete strangers about amount of diet books I have. also checked out gabriel method info. online per arabella. although i haven't gotten book, like the idea of it being safe to be thin now. did borrow from that and have started saying that to myself as part of some positive affirmations i do. 10 mile training walk last weekend-woohoo! i'm impressed. enjoy both or whichever upcoming walks you decide to do.
had a massage today, and what a treat that was. 199 today. wow-did that feel good! it has been so incredibly long since i have seen that number. i know it could teeter back the other way on scale before actually going below this weight offically, but i have to say just seeing this made me very happy this morning. i smiled to myself today every time i remembered seeing those numbers on the scale, and writing them down. i also had non-scale victory and stepped out of my box when i bought a few blouses the other day in lovely bright colors (teale, pink, and turquoise.) normally, i stick to black(mostly), brown, or navy. it made me feel like i did when i got my red purse. now, of course, i have to actually wear these blouses out in public. i will just remind myself what fun it is to use my red purse when my courage/self-confidence starts to peter out. well, have another very busy day tomorrow, so must away. greetings to all our lovely royals. take care.
Oh, wsw!! I'm so psyched for you to see those numbers on the scale! The last time I saw that number was at my first pre-natal visit with my first pregnancy! In 1985! With such an accomplishment under your belt (literally!), PLEASE be sure to wear your pretty new colors with your head held high... you deserve to feel good about yourself and flaunt it a little!
I need to get back to work... I'm staying late tonight to get all caught up, so I really shouldn't be taking sidetrips to the Palace! But I just popped in for 1 wee minute, and had to respond to such momentous news!
Rain, rain and more rain round my neck o' the woods... hoping for sunshine tomorrow! If I don't get back in here, Have a wonderful weekend, s!
kat-thanks so much for the rousing support!! rained buckets here today too. i looked like a skinned rat when i got caught in one of the biggest cloudbursts this afternoon.
stayed op today and still have to finish up a bit more exercise for the day, but should be able to accomplish that. my best friend is going with me to look at a couple more independent living places on tuesday. he has such a great sense of humor, and can always make me laugh even during situations which are not always the most fun, so i know it won't be too difficult at all.
i just realized i can cross my legs easier than i could before, and how much fun that is. also, tomorrow i think i just may wear one of my new bright-colored blouses.
well, i hope all who dwell in the palace have a good evening. take care.
Yes, by all means, wear one of the bright colored blouses. You'll look as great as you've got to feel with all that success.
Hi, kat - good to see you back and sorting out what works - you've been an inspration too. And good luck on the upcoming graduation of your baby. No matter how old he gets, he'll always be your
Lovely morning here and I've spent some time cleaning out the garage and going through some of the old stuff there. (Recently removed from the attic.) Dirty job but a few laughs.
Now I think it's time to clean me up and make me beautiful for the day - or as good as it gets. Sun is out and I'm feeling a zillion times better.
Week before last was not stellar -- I stopped doing much Gabriel Method stuff other than listening to the guided meditation before I went to sleep. And I was having one of those weeks. But this week has been much better -- haven't been interested in eating when I wasn't hungry, deciding what I want to eat is a big salad, feeling satisfied on that, etc. Not getting bent out of shape about things that would have had me stressed out, either, which is a lovely extra benefit. I like it!
The babe is at home and so is DGS. Life returns to semi-normal, other than, of course, prepping for bootcamp and working. But this is not my heavy work week (they alternate) and I'm determined to control my job rather than letting it run me ragged.
I'm doing sprints in my woods woggle, liking feeling fast. And, wow, what a full-body workout that is. You can just feel everything engaged.
Had too much wine last night and stayed up later than usual but woke up 4ish. I'm starting to flag a bit...
WSW WOW!!! You're in Onederland! Congratulations! I had to laugh -- crossing my legs easily and well is one of the items that I think of as putting one into the "normal weight" category. Huzzah!
Your blouses soundlovely! I always get such a lift from colors. I was the of Black for many years but started wearing bright colors about a year ago.
Anagram, I'm glad you had fun at lunch and singles dinner functions. I had a little laugh of recognition there, too -- I really like space between my engagements. I was talking to a politician yesterday and she was telling me about the four or five things events lined up for her weekend (after the party we were attending at that moment). I guess i'm never going to be a politician. Ah, you'll be slipping over the border to Onederland any day now. And I'll be chasing you!
Kat, the emotional obesity thing is interesting. I don't know what all the reasons were that I decided I needed to be fat but I know that I did. I'm going to have a look for some binaural beats relaxation music and record a guided meditation over it. His is good but I think I need something for daytime, too.
It's great to see you back in the Palace! We miss you so when you're on Walkabout.
Now where beith s Kaylets and Ceara? We know Andria is up to her royal heinie in end of school stuff, right?
thank you so much for the kind words, anagram and arabella!! by the way, i did wear my teal blouse today, and it was quite fun.
so glad to hear new baby is safely home, as is dgs, and that life is returning to semi-normal, arabella. sounds like gabriel method has lots of benefits, including not getting bent out of shape over things that might have otherwise stressed you out. i am becoming increasingly intrigued by it.
anagram-your going through old stuff inspires me to try and start doing some of same. i am constantly amazed at how much more stuff i seem to have accumulated in just the 5+ years i have lived in my condo. it definitely mysteriously seems to multiply even though i really try to keep some order in here. sunny here today too, and enjoyed being out today while taking care of some errands.
listening to some good music now, and am going to curl up with a book, and some more music soon. i too woke up way too early this morning, arabella, and need to make this a very early evening.
hi kaylets, ceara, andria, kat, janga, wildfire, and all our royals---thinking of you! well, hope everyone is having a good evening. take care, all.
Ohhh...we've slipped down to Page 2, I just had to boost this back up. I'm was finishing up at work and my computer decided it was time to stop, NOW, apparently, and froze up on me! Who am I to argue?
I got my walk in yesterday, with the Scleroderma group... I must be getting used to the long walks, because this one seemed like a piece of cake! It couldn't have taken more than an hour, at a semi-leisurely pace. I should have done the big walk on Saturday too! Live and learn.
I got my Gabriel Method book this weekend and have begun to read. You know, sometimes the things you already know in your heart make much more sense when they are told to you by someone else! I like what he's saying and have applied a few techniques, with good results, so far today. Mostly just a matter of acknowledging my 'hunger,' analyzing it, and acting upon it, if it's 'true,' or being aware of the trigger, if it's not. And I'm keeping a little list in my drawer, just to have a record of my hunger cues... Self awareness? Accountability? Eh, whatever works this week, right?
I have to run... time to punch out... we're off to a Board of Ed meeting at which son will receive an award for Odyssey of the Mind Competition he participated in.
I'm so glad that didn't just echo back at me. Lots going on in my head this morning, but mostly I'm trying to enjoy the morning for a few before letting life kick into high gear. My eldest princess graduates on Thursday, and a few family members are flying in for the celebration. This means there is a whole lot of cleaning still ahead of me!
I can't believe she is graduating high school already. It seems just yesterday that she was a precocious four year old driving me lightly nuts with all sorts of questions about the world around her. I know the years fly by quickly, but I'm also coming to the realization that I was incredibly shut down during a lot of the time she was growing up. We've had a few really good years though, and I think one day my beautiful daughter will forgive me completely for the painful ones.
Didn't mean for that to get so melancholy sounding. Really, I'm just wafting through memories here, and I'm realizing that there are entire years which are pretty much blank. I'm glad I don't live like that anymore. There is so much stronger a sense of SELF inside of me now, and I doubt I could go back to that previous way of being even if I did want.
So, cleaning is on the docket today. Lots of cleaning. My dad is allergic to cats, and we have three in the house. We do keep the guest room free of kitties, and with the help of antihistamines, an air purifier, and vacuuming everything in reach, he should survive a couple of days without too bad a time.
I'm also decluttering as I go, and I am completely blown away with what has accumulated during the course of the school year. The desk I'm typing at right now has three stacks of mishmashed stuff, all of which are threatening to crash down upon my keyboard. Ugh! I thought I might have time left to begin tackling my closet as well, but we will see. I haven't put away winter sweaters, jackets, or heavy bedding yet, and Space Bags await! I'm actually looking forward to this. I'm hearing it from all the s--cleaning is cathartic. Organizing and/or getting rid of my stuff makes my heart and head feel lighter.
I'd like my reward for the day to be a relaxing swim at the pool. To get the reward I have to get to work. No more time for slacking!
Andria
P.S. I saved personal replies for the next time I'm needing a break. Don't you dare think I've forgotten all of you!
This happens every time I add some new high-intensity thing to my workouts. Which tends to coincide with a new run at the whole weight loss thing.
I'm not losing weight. I can feel and see changes in my body but I'm not lighter or smaller. Very much firmer, though. It's amazing how quickly things seem to firm up. My guess is that the muscles hold water. I think it's the sprinting. Anyway, not going to quit.
I'm going slightly mad trying to get my work done and get ready for bootcamp so I'm going to have to cut this short. Being the optimistic (insane?) person that I am, I also booked myself to pick up DGS after school today and have him and my mom over for dinner, dropping in to see the new babe when we drop him off.
Also didn't get enough sleep last night so everything seems a little more difficult this morning. Oh well
WSW--I was so excited to see you are in Wonderland! You are such an inspiration! Its just what I needed to see to remind me that persistence will win out. Good for you!
Wood Nymph--Sorry to be coming in on the tail end, I see a baby "is home"; glad to know a bad situation has been resolved.
And the bootcamp sounds so much up your alley!
Anagram-- Will this rain continue all summer??? And congrats on your Onederland trip too! Don't cry, you're bound to go down again, remember what the Empress always says: "Its not a real gain!"
Silver-- Schools out for summer... I am envious! And yes, my desk looks the same.....But I too will make a real difference in the desk TODAY!!!
KAT-- you know what Kat, you are right, right, right!! A goal with a date is a good thing!! I want to do that too.... Maybe not a marathon but definitely reset the compass!!
Empress--- Are you lurking??? How are you? How goes the job front? You are missed!
*****
SO good to be home. Where have I been. Everywhere it seems. At least mentally.
It's like that old Grateful Dead song, "what a long strange trip its been"....
Family things that seem to just spinout like car tires in mud, spin, spin, spin....Making noise and smoke but stuck. So many things the same, I won't bore you. Some new players that have suprised me but now I realize are just showing their true colors.
Job things too....
Not enough palace time, music or quiet time.
BUT-- FRESH START is always right here, right within grasp.
Yes, I agree.... we choose how to deal. Or not deal.
Time to start cleaning off the desk, get a load of laundry in and pull some weeds.....
And where better to do such? Of course, at the Palace! Always a welcoming word, a smile, a good story to read...
I'm feeling the memory pangs too, Andria... my baby boy is graduating next week... again: WHERE DID THE TIME GO?? I'm sure no matter what the past holds, your daughters will aways look up to you for steering your course into much calmer, peaceful waters!
Arabella, you are always an inspiration to me! I'm so psyched about your upcoming boot camp, can't wait to hear tales of your 'survival!' I read the first 5 or 6 chapters of the Gabriel Method... loved it... felt awesome for a few days, really in control............. and then? I don't know, I think when I'm left to my own devices. (everyone gone this weekend) I just... get bored? I don't know, I think I'll, ahem, FINISH the book this time and just start afresh!
Kaylets! I'm hearing you loud and clear on the family things... yeah, can't go there now...takes too long! The Palace is a wonderful retreat from all that, when you can get here! (how well I know)
Anagram... I'm doing the cleanout thing here, too... what with all the rain lately, it's much easier to stay inside and just forge ahead. I have two pick ups scheduled and am determined to unload a TON of stuff!
wsw... how did you fare looking at the new places? Anything look promising? I'm quite envious of your 'leg-crossing' and can't wait for the day when I can, once again, do it gracefully!
Sorry to make this such a quickie post, but I'm bound and determined to finish what I have started: major cleanout of the coat closet, I've already filled two bags... I did my closet yesterday and the linen closet... and when I'm done with that, a good, thorough vacuuming and dusting, come **** or high water! The sun just came out too, and I could so easily be lured outside, but I shall persevere!
Monday, Monday!! La, la.... Somehow that Mama's and Papa's song always stays with me!!
I think I hear raindrops ( again) which means for sure, we don't have to worry about drought but does mean another overcast day. I listen to Satellite radio with headphones at work and have purposelly stopped listening to "Major" news channels. It cuts the annoyance level down considerably-- their view of "news" vs what's really happening....( What will make ratings rather than be accurate...) And the other thing that might seem petty about tv and radio "reporters" is their grammar and sentence structure skills.....I know, I know, they are reading from a teleprompter.....Seems like the comprehension isn't there...So many things are sooooo mispronounced, etc.
Anyway, the point is, I listen to other stations, specific programs, etc, etc.
At least I'm not thinking the entire time "That's not true!" or "Why is some celebrity divorce more important than a missing child, etc, etc." .....
I guess that is a Monday rant.....
Thank's for letting me get it out of my system.
I go to work after all today, I realized the trip I planned for today would have been a mistake.
It's very sad to realize what's been going on for many years now but I guess its good to know now. And to think people you have known for a long, long time wouldn't surprise you......but here's why I was surprised....I have found that I didn't know them.... not very well.... A situation presented itself and DH realized he had to share some info....Older info that DH kept from me becuase it was so distasteful and disrespectful.
So now have my eyes opened and know my trip today would have been a mistake.
But you know what, this will not spoil my brand new Fresh Start. I am done with letting family stress push me off the wagon. Especially when this is so unnecessary. Sad that middleaged people choose to live this way. Over so very, very little.
*************
Thought of the day:
"It is not what happens to that determines how far you do in life;
It is waht you do with what happens in life."
Zig Ziglar
Question of the day:
"Who is your favorite inspirational or motivational writer ( speaker) ?"
andria- must be amazing to have dd graduate! how exciting, and of course, it must indeed be hard to believe how quickly the years passed since she was but a wee princess.
kat-exciting about your ds's upcoming graduation! even though i don't have children, just seeing how quickly my friends' children are growing/have grown, just astounds me. can't even imagine what it must be like for a mother to go through all those emotions.
arabella- hope you are enjoying boot camp!
kaylets- thanks for your kind words of encouragement! finding out true colors of family or close friends can definitely be challenging and disappointing sometimes. hang in there!
and hello anagram, janga, ceara, and wildfire. thinking of you all.
seeing how many royals are cleaning out their palaces continues to inspire me to stick with it.
i wasn't wowed by either independent living place last week, and keep hoping will find something that feels like it could be a better fit. that said, it doesn't mean that i won't end up choosing something i have already seen, but at this point, i think i need to continue to look. at least, i'm starting to get more estimates for what needs to be repaired/ fixed up in order to sell my condo.
staying op and exercising, and wearing more of my new bright colors.
one of my friends had a baby girl last week, and she is soooo adorable!
i have had 2 out of 4 sessions in a pain coping skills workshop, which is very interesting, and helpful-guided imagery, etc. at the very least, it is reminding me to do my deep breathing, etc. the woman who is doing this has made a couple of cd's of the exercises, which helps to listen to.
i was in a store earlier today, and a toddler came up and said, "hello, lady!" and gave a big smile and a wave. his mom just smiled and said i hope he isn't bothering you. it is amazing how something like that can just make one's day. i had been feeling a bit frazzled prior to that, and the stressful thoughts that had just been going through my mind immediately just washed away. it's kind of like the good feeling i get whenever i am in the presence of all of you in the royal kingdom. well, have a good evening, one and all.
Oh, the excitement of proms and graduations. Bring back so many memories. The time since has passed as fast as those "growing up years" pass. So happy for you Moms as you swirl through it all.
Hope the bootcamp prep is going well, arabella, and wow, so much cleaning out going on in the palace! We'll get this world in shape one way or another.
Big choices there, wsw. Lots of research and decisions. My sweet neighbor found her "move to" house last week, put hers on the market on Thursday, accepted an offer on Sunday. Things must be picking up - at least in my neighborhood. I've not really met any of the new neighbors across the street.
Good to see you, kaylets. Know you're always missed. I didn't make it to onederland. Once more, I approached and pfft!!!!! A few days after I hit that "almost" 200.8, I was up to 210. I am currently 203. My scale loves to torment me.
I went back to pool workouts today. It has really been a year and a half - talk about time passing. And I could tell by the one session that it's SO good for me. Been walking at dusk and enjoying. But mostly regroupint and reflecting. Back to morning reads on the patio of P&C. Doing what's worked in the past and trying to stay away from the bad habits that have done me in. "Too soon old, too late smart".
Warning: Rambling post ahead!
I get myself 
ALTHOUGH, this does mean that I will be adding to my insanely ridiculous stack of diet books. I piled them up in the garage when I was preparing for my garage sale and then couldn't bring myself to put them outside for fear of judgement by complete strangers about the absurd amount of diet books I have and apparently didn't read. For the record, there are 15 books in the garage and 3 that made the cut and are still at my bedside... (another sidetrack: I just run out to count them!) I won't even get started on the dvds, videos and various pieces of exercise equipment gathering dust over here! Oh, yes... EMOTIONAL OBESITY I have in spades!
wsw for 35 lbs gone! 
Anagram: My own P of P&Tis starting to shape up and I think of you when I'm partaking of the P&T! 
Andria! So glad to see you back in the Palace! School's almost out for my baby, too! Graduation 6/24! 
to Kaylets, ceara, Janga... I hope I haven't missed anyone! Hi lurkers, too! 
i smiled to myself today every time i remembered seeing those numbers on the scale, and writing them down. i also had non-scale victory and stepped out of my box when i bought a few blouses the other day in lovely bright colors (teale, pink, and turquoise.) normally, i stick to black(mostly), brown, or navy. it made me feel like i did when i got my red purse. now, of course, i have to actually wear these blouses out in public. i will just remind myself what fun it is to use my red purse when my courage/self-confidence starts to peter out. well, have another very busy day tomorrow, so must away. greetings to all our lovely royals. take care.
In 1985! 
s!
No matter how old he gets, he'll always be your 
The Saturday Palace
But this is not my heavy work week (they alternate) and I'm determined to control my job rather than letting it run me ragged. 
WSW 
Ah, you'll be slipping over the border to Onederland any day now. And I'll be chasing you! 
yeah, can't go there now...takes too long! The Palace is a wonderful retreat from all that, when you can get here! (how well I know)