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Old 07-03-2009, 08:58 PM   #466  
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Thank you thank you gymlee and littlebitajoy! It's nice to meet some fellow shorties.

aino: those are some great quotes. Thanks for sharing them.

Anyone have exciting plans for the 4th? I'm thinking that I'll be good with calories tomorrow....mostly because I don't like a lot of the food being served. haha baked beans and coleslaw just don't appeal to me.
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Old 07-07-2009, 10:49 AM   #467  
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Hey everyone. welcome ballerina.

so i am back from my vacation - with my bf's family who OVEREATS... and in those 5 days...i couldnt keep a low glucose diet...and i gained 3.5 pounds!!! that means I went from 111.5 all the way back to 115!! I'm back again to a really bad spot and now am so upset.

I need a challenge. Shall we set individual challenges? or a group thread challenge?
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Old 07-07-2009, 07:01 PM   #468  
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Sorry for the delayed welcome, Ballerina ! I've been meaning to say hi for a few days ! Hope you're finding this site usefuL!

Mermaid - I think an individual challenge for me! I just don't know what? I'm in a HORRIBLE shape this week - my boss just got promoted, and me? my responsibilities increase but no promotion for me, oh no. As my boss tells me, "well, it's not in the budget right now..." and yes, the boss's promotion is? Her promotion = a lot more in pay raise than mine would have. I'm SO upset right now. and Being a canadian here in the US, I can't just quit either since then I'd have to leave the country right away too I just know that if I can't bring these tears under control soon, I'll be binging tonight....
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Old 07-07-2009, 10:01 PM   #469  
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at least you have a job aino. ive cried every day for the past 6 months... and i continue to cry and binge every night. job troubles are the worst! dont cry-work it out instead you can do it!
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Old 07-08-2009, 12:42 AM   #470  
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Aino- Oh man! I'm so sorry to hear about not getting promoted. But like mermaid said, at least you still have a job. You could be without one like so many people are right now. I was personally freaking out about losing my job because my temporary status is up in like 2 weeks and this other girl just got fired the other day and I was like OMG I'm next. But I wasn't. They actually pulled me in and asked me if I wanted to transfer to another department which I totally jumped at because it meant a secure job as long as I keep doing what I'm doing. It's only part time but it's better than nothing right now. It actually kinda works out because I want to go back to school in the fall anyway. But at least be thankful for what you have but never forget to strive to do better. It will come with consistent effort. Always remember that everything happens for a reason. I'm a prime example with this whole job thing thinking I was going to get fired but getting transfered instead with a few less hours which works out for school. I know I repeated myself but I wanted to make sure you got the story

Mermaid- I wouldn't worry too much about gaining those 3.5 pounds. It's probably mostly water weight from eating things that weren't low GI so don't fret. Get back to the program and up your water and you should be fine. I know it's frustrating but you can't changed what happened, you can only control how you react to it and what you do to combat and prevent it.
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Old 07-08-2009, 12:44 PM   #471  
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thanks guys. Yes I know I should be grateful i ahve a job, and for the most part I am. But I'm just feeling very humiliated and demotivated right now. To be in the same position for two years in the corporate world is bad enough, but to be in the same position for two years when your own manager is getting promoted, you feel like a bit of a useless dunce. Am I not good enough? Will I ever be? It's frustrating too because no matter how many times I ask - well, what are the markers you want me to achieve that will get me the promotion, or a raise or SOMETHING - ? And everyone jsut hedges..

Sorry to take it out here, guys. I'm just feeling extremely depressed at being stuck. It's like I am 30, still single, still overweight, stuck at a job where it's nto going anywhere - I jsut feel like not even one thing is gong my way. And no matter how hard I try, i always slide back further than where I had started.
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Old 07-08-2009, 05:37 PM   #472  
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Aino- I understand how you are feeling.

I am 25 and still unemployed and still out of shape and fat and my relationship hasnt went anywhere in 7 years (or sort of sliding backwards)... The past three years, I feel like i have been having such bad luck and I am always losing something moving backwards and always sliding down a hill too. I am lucky I still have my mom and dad and for the moment a roof over my head.... but not having a job is killer - even though im 35,000 plus in debt for getting my masters degree and such... and being ashamed of your body is killer and having spent 7 years in a relationship when you worry its not going to move in the right direction... its all exhausting and depressing. BUT ...

that is why i am so happy to have this thread and website and supportive weight loss buddies to be on this journey with.
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Old 07-09-2009, 06:18 PM   #473  
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mermaid - what a great description of sliding backwards AND down a hill! That's it exactly!

*sigh*

BUT I am so glad I have you guys here! You're right, things are just so tough for all of us, in their own way! All we can do it persevere and keep trying to improve! And I pray and hope it wilL!

I hope you get a job soon. I know this is a public forum and all that, but if you let me know (privately if you prefer) what kind of job you're looking for, I can keep an eye out for you since I get listings sent my recruiters sometimes, and I'll send them your way.
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Old 07-10-2009, 08:58 PM   #474  
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Aino/Mermaid- Kudos on the attitude shift, Aino. A lot of it is your perspective on things and your attitude that will shape your future. We can change anything as long as we have the right attitude and believe that it's worth it. You just gotta keep going and making the choices and decisions that bring you closer to whatever it is that you're looking to do whether it's getting a better job, improving your relationships or losing weight. It can all be done. Remember the adidas slogan: Impossible is nothing. I just love it because it makes it seem so unlimited. Just keep striving. You'll get there.

Last edited by gymlee; 07-10-2009 at 09:01 PM.
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Old 07-11-2009, 03:31 PM   #475  
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mermaid & aino: thanks for the welcome!

I'm so sorry to read about all the job stress.
I'm alright on the job front, for now...but I can definitely sympathize with the weight and guy troubles.

I go out and talk with guys....but I get such mixed signals from some of them. There's this one guy I see a lot when I go out, and some nights he'll come up to me and give me a hug like he's so happy to see me, and then other nights (like last night) he's polite....but not overly friendly. Doesn't help matters that I used to have a *huge* crush on him years and years ago (we were in elementary school together), didn't see him for a decade, and then I saw him again recently and got a crush on him all over again!

I guess a big fear for me is...what if I lose the weight, and still don't meet a guy? Or what if it's something where I lose the weight....and then suddenly a guy that used to ignore me is interested? Has that happened to any of y'all? Did you resent the guy for ignoring you until you were thin?

I try to look at it in a more positive light...they'll like me more when I'm *healthy*.....but it's still a hard pill to swallow.
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Old 07-11-2009, 06:23 PM   #476  
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Wow-
Well I can't give much advice because I kind of started out thin and that got fat after my boyfriend... late in college... but it has messed me up the other way around. Like I noticed with both boys and girls... I started to get less girlfriends and the boys who used to flirt and talk to me kind of drifted away. I never get compliments like I used to. It's really hard.

I certainly know how you feel about old crushes though. I have a few of those myself, where even if I have not seen them in person, like they always stay on your mind in some little way and sometimes events can bring it back... but is he a nice person? I decided many years ago, that is what truly matters. Looks are always changing, I'd rather have a guy with a big heart.

You will def. meet a guy somewhere between now and later. The weight loss, (We can't lie to ourselves) will make a difference, but it shouldn't make a huge one. The fact is, if you are confident where you are at, you will attract boys! But if a guy meanly ignored you or just plain ol ignored you and then all of a sudden is like hey, hey remember me?? I wouldn't go there. Meet someone new, or someone who has been nice and on the sidelines but maybe just didn't feel as physically attracted to you as you wished he had.

I can't appreciate people who think that because I've gained weight... I should no longer be associated with. and i do worry everyday my boyfriend is less and less attracted to me and looking at those anorexic girls with lust!
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Old 07-13-2009, 10:31 PM   #477  
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Ballerina- I totally get what you're saying. I had a whole array of fears when it came to weight loss and men but honestly, it doesn't matter if you're 500 pounds or 100 pounds, there will always be issues with guys and you can't let it affect your weight loss. The thing that *should* ideally happen is that as you lose the weight and you gain self confidence and power, you will become more attractive to others. As for worrying about not finding a guy even after you lose the weight, I wouldn't because all things happen in time. It's not likely that you'll stay alone forever. And the thing with the guys who are suddenly interested just because you've lost weight, I wouldn't give those that seem to be purely interested on a superficial level the time of day. But at the same time don't push them away just because it took dropping a few pounds for them to suddenly become attracted to you either. There has to be some level of physical attraction there or a guy won't go there, so you have to find that delicate balance. I know it's hard to figure guys out but it will be pretty obvious to tell which are into you for what reasons when the weight comes off. And always remember that you do have a voice and can control what happens between you and guy. For example, if suddenly a guy that didn't know you existed before is like over the top flirting with you and commenting mostly on the physical attributes rather than pursuing you on other levels you can probably tell that he's more interested in you physically and it's totally your perogative to be like "Listen step off." So just take it day by day, put yourself out there, and know that you have the strength, power and ability to attract who you want whether you're where you are now or at your goal weight. And if things don't always work out, know that they are learning experiences and that you're strong enough to come through the other side.

As for a general update for me, I'm happy to say I'm starting to get my eating back on track and I did level 1 of 30DS!!! I was blown away by the fact that I was able to make it through with less effort than I thought I was going to have to put out. I'm not saying that it was easy, because I know if I said that Jillian would probably hunt me down, find me, and give me a beating like no other for saying that (because we all know she lurks around on here lol), but I had less difficulty than I had anticipated, so I was totally stoked! I'm going to try and kick it up a notch and do BFBM tomorrow. *crosses fingers* I have a busy day but I think I can get it in.

How are all you ladies doing?
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Old 07-14-2009, 03:46 PM   #478  
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Thank you mermaid and gymlee. I think I just really needed to vent that out. :-)

I think part of what frustrates me is that I feel like a 15 year old school girl with boy drama....as opposed to a 24 year old.

I'm doing pretty good on my calorie counting. Exercise is biting me in the butt though. I haven't been doing it. Need to go get ready for work now, but I'm going to sit down tonight and write out a serious schedule that I'll stick to.

gymlee: what is BFBM? I tried googling it but I didn't have any luck. Some of the acronyms escape me.
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Old 07-14-2009, 08:09 PM   #479  
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Ballerina - you and me both sister !Trust me, I'm 30 - and I feel like I'm 15 as well, the way things end up with guys! *sigh* I sure hope things change soon! You're still a youngun, me ...not so much! On the other ahnd, good job on the calorie counting! As for exercising, it IS hard to get going but I'm told that once you do, you become addicted and *want* to do it everyday! So looking forward to that!

Mermaid - good point! If someone who ignored you when you're heavier is suddenly interested once you're skinnier - they're the ones to avoid at all costs!

Gymlee - congrats on completing level 1 of 30DS! How did the BFBM workout go?

(BFBM = Banish Fat, Boost Metabolism ! Another Jillian Michael workout! like 30 Day Shred!)
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Old 07-14-2009, 08:09 PM   #480  
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PS - i think I use WAY too many smileys!! Yet another evidence of the 15 year old in me ;-)
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