Size 10 - good for you! I started out at a 16/18, and now I'm a 14/16... I'm impatient to see more changes though. And with regards to my chest - that's the only part of me I wish I wasn't losing! Stated out at a good C, now I'm really a B, and shrinking, ugh.
Been really busy lately so not much time to pop online.
Water still chugging down 60-80oz a day.
Walking is still going good too!
4/21 so far!!
Red--It's been 5yrs since we've joined?? Wow! Time sure flys. Your challenges sound challenging. I don't think I could do it so I commend you for doing a great job so far!! And if I remember correctly, you always succeed. You do such a great job. Keep at it, even during those "blue" times.
Rennie--I remember completing a few challenges back a few years and it was a great feeling. So far so good here. Hoping that I'll make it! I totally agree with you about sizes. If you're working out and toning up, the scale may never budge, but the clothes are actually fitting. Something good is going on. Fabulous job on wearing 10's!
Jolly--The little voices.......they're just evil! You WILL get below 200 and then some! Don't even worry for a minute that you won't. An 8 mile run! That's wonderful! My walks consist of 2.5 miles in half an hour. I can't even begin to image running 8. You're doing fabulous!
Pat--You're also doing great. You've got yourself set up with a great little workout system. You're going to do fine, just keep at it and take one day at a time. If it's too much, you'll know. And you can always revamp it. That's the beauty of it all. There is no "set" way to do things. Keep up the great work!
Miriam--I love the "me" time! With busy schedules everyone has, "me" time is an absolute must! Keep up the great work and if at all possible.....squeeze in more than 5 minutes for yourself. Maybe treat it as a "job" you have to go to and then leave for half an hour. (I know, easier said than done) Good luck!
Apple--You have a tough challenge too! I'm not very good at the no "treats". For some reason I have to "reward" myself. So bad. I think I may have to take up that challenge myself! And soon! Good luck!
I hope I haven't missed anyone. I don't always get a chance to post everyday, but I will try to catch up once I do get on.
I messed up - starting over for 3 meals. I still see what an emotional eater I am - DH< read DARN HUSBAND - or any other expletive you'd like to substitute..> ticked me off today and took away my appetite, so no 3 meals. Should I take a puase so early? Maybe better to just start over.
now is my ME-time, not much of it, and too irritable to enjoy anything anyway. I did enjoy Weird Al's song "Smells like Nirvana" though, made me lough out loud - literally.
Serenity - said the words, but today not doing it at all for me. Ugh. What a rotten day.
Yesterday was really tough, craving sugar. Had some yogurt with straight 100% fruit jam mixed in. That's not a challenge breach but it isn't what I'd like to do normally as the jam is very sweet and concentrated and surely sets my blood sugar rocketing. Still, it'll have to do. Also had some sweet fruit. Need more watermelon! I will get through. The no alcohol is an easy one, since I never really liked the stuff. It's when people at work are calling to go out after a stressful day (and that's ANY day at the office ) that the seductive call of the pub is at its most tempting.
Well, the count is a month! 30 days in the hole! I made it!!!!! Never thought I could really. It's good to know I can.
No alcohol 30 days straight (first day off was June 28)
No sugar 27 days straight (first day off was July 1)
No cigs 27 days straight
No processed foods 27 days straight
************** miriam -- Hmmm. Sounds like you had a tough day. So sorry to hear that. I am amazed at people whose appetites suffer. I have to be really sick or really depressed to not have an appetite. I hope that that is not the case for you. As for our challenge, maybe you should redefine what a meal is. You said this challenge was a Level 1, meaning only one pause day. I would start over. Course, we would surely all look away if you changed the level of your challenge partway through.
marti -- Hi there. No, no guys in here, not that I know of anyhow, unless there's someone in disguise. Glad to hear you're chugging and walking. Yeah, my challenges are challenging. And, no, I don't "always succeed," that is, if you mean that in the sense that I make 21 each time. I have had many, many restarts and "unchallenged" times. Seeing as I already made 21 on all the above, the other challenge is an extracurricular, saying I'll go through to my birthday. I have to come up with another to get with the program. The blues are dragging me down. Well, more the bloat from pms. It's the sugar cravings that are bad AND eating. But, since eating is not on a challenge, I am indulging myself, just not with sugar. I am also doing vegetable juice, which was many earlier challenges. You never ever see red beets over here and I heard that they are great blood cleansers. I finally found some on the Net and had them shipped from the north. Put them in with carrot juice. They get me itching, which I hear is a common reaction because the juice is so potent, but I suppose it means something is happening. When I first started doing juice my eyes used to get really bloodshot with all the junk being stirred up in my blood. Now, I don't get that. Must be cleaner! Ok, sorry for the rambling.
Shy -- I wish I could be more like you, not worrying about the scale but just checking out my progress with clothes. I am highly skilled at denial tactics and today's fabrics, stretchy jeans etc. are some of biggest allies...yeah, talk about fair-weather friends, eh? Also, I do need the numbers to come down at some time! But, yes, of far more importance in the day-to-day is how our bodies look and feel. Even today, I am very bloated and the fat around my midsection (notice I don't use the obscure term "waist!" ) is really jellylike. That's from the pms water retention so I know what's going on. Still, it means I will look worse and my clothes will be tighter YET the scale is the same as yesterday. So, it just goes to show, numbers are pretty useless except for the longterm changes. That's great that you are seeing definition. Legs have to have a bodyfat under 18 percent to show definition so you are doing well!
jolly -- I'm glad I could be of help. Glad to hear too that you weren't injured. You hang in there, ok? You are doing SO well and I am really, really proud of you. You have made amazing progress in the last some months. Give yourself a mega-pat on the back!
Dixie -- Your exercise challenge sounds hardcore! Good luck. You are putting me to shame!
Apple -- Ok, glad to hear the binge is over. Did you find a scale? I have a digital one that reads in increments of 200 grams, which is about 7 ounces, so it's moderately sensitive to change (that's almost half a pound though, I was thinking it was less....) and I can see it easily! You've picked some hard challenges, so best of luck!
Last edited by redballoon; 07-27-2008 at 06:56 PM.
Hi Everyone. Red I could never put you to shame.You got it going on. I am very proud of you, you have accomplished so much. You rock.
Miriam~Sorry to hear that you and Hubby had a rough time.
Marti~Thank you! I needed to hear it. It really helps.
Day 2 level 2: I did 1 hour of stepping +30 upper + 30 lower +20 each side oblique crunches + 50 wall push ups. Tomorrow I want to start the weight training. Tomorrow is going to be a busy day. I really need to plan my timing and my food. Or I will be snagged up again! Pat
Red
You are doing terrific. You have a great deal of self control. You should be so proud of yourself. My legs are really defined and so are my biceps. You can see definition in my abs. I am still working on that back of the arm problem ( bat wings ) lol. I am also working on that very upper inner and outer thigh. My abs have a long way to go but I am sure all of this will come together with exercise and getting this extra weight off.
Marti
Those are old 10's not these new 10's that are really 12's or 14's lol. I don't wear stretch anymore because there is just to much give to let me gain a few pounds. I still do a weigh in every two weeks but I don't even bother to think about it other than that. It isn't that the scale isn't important. It is just that, for me, to worry about how much I weigh all the time is counter productive. These last 20 pounds might take awhile to come off. As long as I am going down down down in size I know the weight will also come off sooner or later.
Red
I am going through the same thing right now. I can be as much as 8 pounds up the first couple days of my DOT. I need that weigh in every 2 weeks to keep myself accountable. As I have started to get this darn weight under control I am wearing nothing that doesn't fit exactly how it should and no no no stretchy material. That is another way I keep myself accountable. I use fit day every single day. I know that I have to stay within some general ranges for myself or I am not going to be heading in the direction I want to go.
Miriam
I started out a 42 D I am now a 38 D. The darn things aren't going away lol. I would love to be back to a 34 B. It took me a long long time to go down the first pant size. I bet it was 25 pounds before the tight size 18 st etch jeans were way to big to wear and then another 31 pounds to get to where I am now. Doesn't make sense does it. 25 pounds to go down one size and then 33 pounds to go down 3 sizes lol. I know I have to be around 115 to 120 to wear a size 5 ( not these new size 5 that are really at least a 7 or an 8). I have 4 pairs of pants I wore when I was between 115 and 120 those are my goal. They are a size 5 and one pair of them is at least 20 years old lol. I wore those pants after I had each of my children. I wore those pants until a few years ago when I put on all this weight. Doesn't matter what I weigh. It matters that those pants fit the way they should fit and I sure don't mean tight lol. 120 was a goal. It was something to look forward to. All I really care is that I am in shape and healthy. I want to look nice in those pants I still have When I hit 120 I might say ok I look good and am happy with this weight and how I look and feel. I may find I still need to lose a few pounds. Who knows.
Help!!! I am in HUGE danger of pigging out on sugar, getting drunk whatever. I really want out of this job but don't know what to do.... I'd have to laugh at the whole absurdity if it weren't all so pathetic. I really am about to throw in the towel.......
Red~Please hold on, hang in there!! Don't through away what you have worked and sweated so hard to accomplish. We are all here for you. Let us support you during this time. You are not alone!! We are here for you. ((((((H U G S)))))) from me to you. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Please post and let us know how you are. NO MATTER WHAT Please post so we can help. Pat
I made it through. It wasn't pretty. I ate a lot, but stuck to the challenges. It was a very lousy day, with things just not going my way. A lot of tears, but I allowed myself them.
It was not without accomplishment either. I did stay home from work. I really needed the time away from that ****-hole.
Got my cat to the vet, got me to the gym, worked abs a bit differently and today they are hurting. Calls to friends were deadend and made me feel more lost than ever when asking about advice. But, at least I made them and tonight I will meet some woman who I am hoping can help me get started in the right direction. I need to commit, either to quitting, to starting a new project at work (which I am resisting with hurt pride and humiliation) or to doing both and getting the h@ll out of there (work) once and for all! I am disgusting myself with my seeming lack of options. That just is not tolerable!!
So, here is the tally. I am going to start a new challenge today and put the below three in a new challenge as well so I can allow some pauses. I will continue to log the total tally though. It makes me feel like I've accomplished something.
NEW CHALLENGE
Keep a food and exercise journal. No pauses allowed!
New COUNT for below four:
No booze 3 pauses (allowing the pauses for my birthday and environs...)
No sugar 1 pause
No cigs No pauses
No processed foods 1 pause
***************
No alcohol 31 days straight (first day off was June 28)
No sugar 28 days straight (first day off was July 1)
No cigs 28 days straight
No processed foods 28 days straight
************** Dixie -- Thank you so much for your support. I wrote my SOS message at 5 p.m. here, then somehow got through the rest of the day, thanks to some cries, some walking and watching a good drama that I'd taped off TV. It was about a baseball team and how they hung in there despite LOTS of hardships. It was a series on TV and though terribly melodramatic was JUST what I needed. I also made vegetable juice though I didn't feel like it and had eaten so much my stomach was like a barrel. I drank an entire LITER of juice and it didn't even taste good. Anyhow, I saw your message this morning when I got up at 4:30. Yours and Marti's had come in around midnight here so I was sleeping. Thank you though. It really helps to feel someone cares.
Marti -- Thank you too! You can read the drama above. I feel a slight bit of resolve today. pms coupled with the crap happening at work and my usual feelings of helplessness are what brought this on. Also, not having my usual pacifiers probably made it all feel worse. BUT, those pacifiers do nothing but dull my senses. They do NOTHING to change the situation. Yeah, I feel gross still. My stomach is like a waterbed and the scale is up, but I didn't give in and, thanks to feeling really, really, really, sick of the whole thing, am ready to get in there and fight!!! GROWWWWWWLLLLL!
Last edited by redballoon; 07-29-2008 at 05:24 PM.
Wow, that all said before, I am in a horrible state! Stayed home from the stable, which was probably NOT a good idea as my horse always has a calming/stabilizing effect on me. Now, I still can't make it out the door and to the gym because I am feeling SOOOO irritated it's not funny. I usually don't get pms this bad. I suppose it's because I feel so bad even without pms now. God, it's really bad. Have been yelling at my cat. My skin is really bad, itching, raw and of course my weight is up and I am horribly bloated. My meeting for tonight is probably cancelled, other email I sent out comes back saying the address has been changed...if I can make it through today without killing someone I will be in good shape.
Hang on Red. I'll throw you a line, and then together we can toss part of it back to the wagon to get hauled back on.
I am right there with you. I swear, if anyone would have looked at me wrong today, I would have ripped off their arm and beat them to death with it. I had one of my staff put in her notice because she was burned out with the 24/7 responsibility. I can't blame her. And now I sit here and wonder how the heck I can manage work and school.
I also see how people can gain weight after stomach surgery. Little by little, you stop hurting after eating, and stretch back to what you used to do. I have been making little bad choices here and there. and today made some big bad choices. Up until now, when I ate bad, I physically felt bad. Today? Not so much.
I can not do this - this yoyo crap. This self medicating. It is not ok. i don't want to live like this. Why can't I just say "Hey, it sucks my staff is leaving. It is going to make life more hectic, so who can I ask for what help in the short term and what can I do to send her off with a bang?" instead of "Hey, I think I need to eat everything that isn't nailed down!" Grrrrrrrr. What did I accomplish except gaining weight back and spending money I could have used on other things?
I am not going to do this again. I do not choose to live that way. I choose to be healthy, and not hide behind food and weight, even if that means dealing with life's chaos.
Hey Red, should we try Primal Scream Therapy? Scream with me on 3. 1 - 2 - . . .
Red
You hold on. You are so good at getting thru things. I find your strength very inspiring.
jolly
Isn't that how all of us are. We make one little bad choice and then another. We find you have put on a few pounds or allowed our selfs to do this or that and we know it isn't good for us. All we can do is keep trying. It isn't failure to mess up. We fail when we quit trying.
Shy, jolly! Thanks!! I made it in to work. No one is dead or injured. I also got to the gym....it took a lot of pauses to walk there (50 min). But I got there and did easy weights and talked to a few people. Surprisingly, they were down and said I should come every day because they would feel better. Of course, that made ME feel better! But, really, I had NO power. It was bizarre. But I did it and somewhere along the way a bit of the fog started to lift. Then into the dreaded office and all is quiet for now....sigh. Thanks for having faith in me! I kept thinking of that TV show last night. Glad I taped it because I am going to use it to watch again and again in times of weakness....
Oh, and jolly, the primal scream therapy sounds GOOD!! I want some!! Speaking of Primal Scream, they were just here for the Fuji Rock Festival over the weekend. And now at work I see one of the guys who went, looking very rough...he said it was great.
Last edited by redballoon; 07-29-2008 at 12:21 AM.
I am glad you made it to work REd, without any bloodshed. And for getting to the gym. You go girl!
Thanks Shy. I know you are right.
I am going to try and get back on the calorie counting horse today. I have decided to take a pause on my soda challenge. If I need to "give in" and "be bad" I would much rather it were on a diet, caffeine free soda, then You know what i mean.
It is going to be rough though. School and the 1/2 marathon are getting closer. Things are getting a little nuts again at work - things rumbling. And with my issues, I always worry what it means for me. am I next. Am I doing good enough.
it's a month!
) that the seductive call of the pub is at its most tempting. 
Never thought I could really. It's good to know I can. 
) is really jellylike. That's from the pms water retention so I know what's going on. Still, it means I will look worse and my clothes will be tighter YET the scale is the same as yesterday. So, it just goes to show, numbers are pretty useless except for the longterm changes. That's great that you are seeing definition. Legs have to have a bodyfat under 18 percent to show definition so you are doing well! 
You can read the drama above. I feel a slight bit of resolve today. pms coupled with the crap happening at work and my usual feelings of helplessness are what brought this on. Also, not having my usual pacifiers probably made it all feel worse. BUT, those pacifiers do nothing but dull my senses. They do NOTHING to change the situation. Yeah, I feel gross still. My stomach is like a waterbed and the scale is up, but I didn't give in and, thanks to feeling really, really, really, sick of the whole thing, am ready to get in there and fight!!! GROWWWWWWLLLLL! 
somebody give me some tranqs!
You know what i mean.