Not silly reasons to be aprehensive. I think we all try to talk ourselves out of making changes - of any kind. Change is unexplored territory and can be very scary. I bet you know lots of people who complain all the time about being in a bad situation, whether it's weight loss, or a job they hate, or a bad relationship but they never DO anything about it. That's because it's easier to stay in a bad place that's familiar than to make a change and have to be all alone out there in a new place - even if it is a better place. But, I've seen your posts around 3FC and, whether you realize it or not, you are definitely daring enough to explore being healthy and fit and, yes, skinny.
Remember the real you is your mind - your thoughts, your intellegence, and your ideas. Having a different (nice) body isn't going to change that - your brain isn't going to lose any weight. Yes, people may initially perceive you differently but the real you is the real you no matter what size your jeans are. No need to step into any new roles. And it can be a really fun phenomenon to observe. Some years ago, during one of my thin phases, (strictly as a social experiment mind you
) I became a born again blond. It was really fascinating to sort of sit outside myself and watch how people behaved - they had a tendency to talk to me in simpler language, didn't seem to expect a whole lot from me, and if I did or said something even remotely intellegent they acted like I was Einstein or something. Quite fun actually.
I'm sorry you aren't getting all the understanding and support you need from the people you love but I think the key word there is "understanding". It's just part of being human to have difficulty truly understanding something that is outside the realm of our personal experience. Your mom made herself sick through poor nutrition - so, to her it seems that
everyone who loses weight is going to get sick. And, there is that change thing again. If you change your appearance you might not be the familiar, comfy, LittleMoonRabbit they are used to - and, if they are not in the best of shape themselves, they might look at the new you and have to face the possibility that they need to make changes themselves
. Even your DH is probably a little insecure about changes - what if you suddenly become attractive to other men? I know mine thinks about that - which at my age is really hilarious to me, but not to him (which is one of the reasons I love him
)
But you know what? That's what 3FC is for. Just keep coming here and you'll get all the moral support, cheerleading, and
you need. You've come too far to turn back now!