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-   -   Why do I do this to myself? (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/south-beach-diet/85506-why-do-i-do-myself.html)

BornConfuzed 05-28-2006 03:19 AM

Why do I do this to myself?
 
I started SB last Feb, lost about 11 pounds in the first 4 weeks, less than average but I was happy, felt healthy and actually noticed the difference. 3 weeks later (mid March), no weight loss, not a single pound and then the cheating started!

I'd binge for a a few days then restart phase 1, I didn't feel guilty because I convinced myself that if I gain weight, I'll be able to lose it on phase 1 anyway! The binge-phase 1 cycle lasted until the begining of this month when I decided that hey I don't want to do low carb anymore, I want to start counting calories. The initial idea was to count calories on weekdays and eat "sensibly" on weekends. I was eating too few calories during the week that by the time the weekend came I just pigged-out!!

It's almost the end of May now, and although I maintained my weight loss (11 pounds on SB + 11 on portion control before SB), I feel guilty and a complete failure. I pretend that I'm doing all I can to lose weight, but when I seriously think about it I know I'm cheating half the time.

My sister and I started around the same time, she stuck to a low cal diet which apparantly worked for her, she lost around 35 pounds. I feel happy for her but seeing her reminds me of my inability to stick to any program!

What's wrong with me? I know if I stick to a diet, any diet, I'll eventually lose weight, but I just can't do it!

ErialRose 05-28-2006 09:59 AM

22 pounds does not seem like a failure to me! and you are maintaining that, but I know you want to move forward. Maybe you should use pictures of yourself throughout as a motivator. I know looking at the results everyone else had done with their pictures really motivates me. Can't wait to see 22 pounds off of me! Good luck and best wishes!

Sassy_Chick 05-28-2006 06:39 PM

I know what you mean! I am not on SB but I do know what you mean about starting something then not sticking too it. I'm having an awful time!

I think that with me at least I need to stop obsessing about it and maybe relax a bit and just eat healthy, not a specific plan. ;)

R_Doc 05-28-2006 08:53 PM

Chin up...
 
I agree...not a failure by any means. It's tough not to give up if your weight doesn't seem to peel off. Remember there is no easy answer...no easy pill to help. It's you and any support system you have...even those of on this site...to help you approach it one day at a time! For me I was rolling right along and then the pounds were less and less. It all has to do with you...do this for you! You can do it once you remember this is something that you need to change your life. Look at it as a life style change and not a diet. That has been what is working for me. Chin up....you can do it!!:carrot:

smartypants 05-28-2006 09:56 PM

You're not a failure. You just need to find the right plan for you. I was never successful before SBD. Maybe it will help to remember that SBD isnt' low carb (except for phase 1 detox), it's the right carbs.

StarbucksMom 05-28-2006 09:59 PM

Hey BornConfuzed. PLEASE don't be hard on yourself. We have pretty much all been there, or we wouldn't be here! I have succeeded in the past of losing over 100 pounds. After years of being careful. I splurged a little which turned into alot. I am doing SB now with DH, and I know it's supposed to be easy to follow, but it is tough sometimes. You just pick yourself up, and reach deep down inside you and find what inspires you. You that to help you reach your goal. I am new here and I still don't know all that there is to know about the SB way, But I can be a great sounding board, or support buddy for ya! Blessings to you! ~Linder

beachgal 05-30-2006 06:31 PM

BornConfuzed, sounds like you need a :grouphug: I was just telling a dear friend of mine who's dealing with frustration at her ability to start watching what she eats and exercising that the worst thing you can do to yourself (in terms of preventing success at getting healthy) is to berate and beat yourself up. So stop, okay? :D You're a beautiful, intelligent woman who can do anything she puts her mind to. When you're ready, really ready, to lose this weight, it'll fly off. I promise. :crossed:

It all goes back to Sandi's sig quote: If you want it, you'll find a way, if you don't, you'll find an excuse. You're finding excuses, therefore you don't really want to lose the weight! Think about why that is. What is it doing for you? Why do you feel conflicted? I think sometimes we have to admit to ourselves that we have a reason for sabotaging our diets and exercise plans and that's when healing begins and we can finally follow our hearts in doing what we deserve...to eat healthy and feel healthy! :cb:

You might find journaling helpful...you can journal here on 3FC: Journals People respond to what you post and it can be so helpful to hear that you're not alone in how you feel.

It takes all of us time to get to the point where we can really be committed to what we are doing. If that weren't true, there'd be a ton of teenagers on this site and no one would be older than 20 or so, right? ;) That's hardly the case. It takes time for us to realize our own worth and what we really, truly want from life. You're on the way there and your frustration and anger will help fuel that fire. Just direct it in the right way...towards your habits and changing them, not towards yourself personally. You're human, just like all of us. :hug: But like so many of us, you can do what's right for you...and when you're really ready and really want it, you will. That's a promise. :yes:


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