Stop saying "I cheated" or "I blew it" or any other negative thing about your eating.

This is a pet peave of mine and I'm going to go off for just a second.

We indulge in a special treat occasionally, we do not cheat, we did not blow it, we are not failures for indulging in a favorite food occasionally.

Yes, we do make improper food choices, yes, we may have done with a few less cookies or maybe 1/2 a package less. It happens, we slip, we pick our selves up and we continue to succeed! With all this negative self talk, we are talking ourselves right back into a big old bad feeling day (can't think of the better word), which leads to more indulging that we don't need.

If it was a serious indulgence, sit down and figure out what triggered it. What was going on. Did you enjoy yourself or did you feel horrible guilt? Is it worth the feelings of guilt? Are you feeling incredibly uncomfortable phsically?

If you enjoyed yourself then go a head and have a little every once in awhile, have a special dinner at a restaurant on a special occasion-not every day, not every week.

If you feel guilty and horrible and your feel your self winding down into deep dark depression; remember this and how you feel so when you are tempted with this again you won't repeat it.

If you are phsyically uncomfortable, remember this feeling after eating an unwise food choice so when confronted with it again, you can say, "No, it doesn't agree with me. I can eat it if I want to feel gassy and bloated tomorrow."

Learn from every slip up so that when you are confronted with it again you'll be more able to control yourself.

Ok, yes, I'm getting off my soap box now and wiping the foam from my mouth. Slightly embarrassed for going off, but passionate enough about this to go ahead and post it.

Sarah

Thanks for the wake up call Sarah & the new view of the "slips"!!

Sarah --

like we've heard before -- it's all about moderation. Great post to keep us in check. I whole heartedly agree. If we give up, we'll never learn to eat properly!

Amen Sister Sarah! Thanks for keeping us in check! I'm a big believer in "self talk" and the effects of neg and positive thinking!

Very valid points, sarah!! Kudos to you for stepping up there! Please remember, though...that some of us NEED to talk things out on here, which I think is fine. As long as it doesn't turn into a place to make excuses and feel sorry for ourselves, but rather a place to move forward and learn to feel our feelings instead of eating them.

I agree completely, Sarah!
Thanks for getting on your soapbox.

"but rather a place to move forward and learn to feel our feelings instead of eating them."

Yes, exactly, learn and feel not feed. Great way of saying it.

I've learned that I will not volunteer for another Smithsonian Folk Life Festival in the food section again. That was painful and I will not go through that again.

I've learned that if I am sitting with a bunch of friends with munchies in the middle of the table I will eat until well past full, without even thinking about it ---so sit farther away from the munchies. I've picked up the plate and said "get these away from me, put them at the other end and don't let me get to it."

I had just ridden the bus with a co-worker who whined the whole ride in about how disgusted she was because she binged on chocolate chip cookies and ice cream last night and what a horrible person she was and it just made me angry but I didn't say anything to her at the time because she's really not a friend and I was afraid I'd be a little too...passionate about the subject. Then I got on the forum and saw so many topics about this subject that I sort of jumped in without actually reading what everyone else was saying. They were actually well aware of what happend in their slips uh I mean indulgences.

Sarah

I've learned that if I ask the waiter not to bring the bread basket and they bring it anyway that I get great satisfaction from 'accidentally' pushing it off the table and onto the floor.

um...did i say that?

Go Val! That's the way to show 'em!

Sarah, this was a great thread. I have had a lot of trouble working out a "healthy mindset" about "bingeing" vs. "indulging." It all comes back to the feelings around it. I can still feel fine if I wanted it, enjoyed a portion, and didn't obsess about wanting more or feeling guilty afterwards, and just had a good time. Other times, eating is an outlet for emotions, I get into "stuff my face mode", and end up wallowing in self hatred and shame. These are very different things to me.
I agree that "cheating" is simply a fact of life, and shouldn't be addressed so negatively. I was thinking about this last night, how there is no "perfect dieter". We're all normal people, we all LIVE (aka have "slip ups"), and all we can do is learn from it and move on. Punish ourselves is not an effective way to deal with it as it inevitably leads to the horrible cycle of bingeing and punishing.
That's my two cents on the matter.

What a great reminder to us, Sarah! I am so guilty of beating myself up over things like too much Cool Whip or something rediculous. In the grand scheme of things, it really doesn't matter!!

Fallin' down aint the problem...it's staying down!!!

Right on Jen415!!

Thanks Sara! You rocked my day!

Great post, Sarah!

If we truly think of this as a 'Way Of Eating (WOE)', and not a diet plan, then cheating doesn't exist. We might eat something that, on hindsight, we wish we hadn't eaten, but we live and learn and use the knowledge to avoid it in the future.

I've noticed that those who tend to say they've cheated tend to post that more frequently than those who simply say, "I ate ___ and I know it wasn't the right choice. Next time I'll do ____ to avoid making that choice again." Just an observation.

Here's to eating healthy and getting up when we fall with new knowledge and greater determination!

I'm on phase 1............again.....into week 2 and have done really well. Down 7 pounds and doing it right but today bought a watermelon and wanted to taste it. Was feeling rotten because I had watermelon.......WATERMELON! Where's my thinking????? It's summer! It was a slice! It was yummy! Good for me. That doesn't mean I've ruined phase 1!!!!!!!!!!! I needed to hear your soap box! Thanks!

I guess it's just all a matter of perspective and how emotionally mature you are about your little "indiscretion". Part of losing weight and getting healthy is realizing that, yes, what you put into your body matters! If you screw up, talk about it if you want to, own it, then move on and don't do it again (at least for a while ). IMO just because someone says "I cheated" or "I binged" doesn't necessarily mean that they're downing themselves or claiming that they are now some sort of abject failure with no hope of ever succeeding. It could be that many of the people who post their mistakes here are simply looking for some encouragement and support which is exactly what this board is for. Or it could even just be that lots of us happen to be in that TOM lately!?! I know there may be times that I need some encouragement or maybe even a kick in the @$$ and I will be also be there for anyone else who needs encouragement or a little accountablity.

Amen, pearshape!