I was reading the replies to my inquiry (incredibly helpful-thanks!) and was wondering how many of us feed their dh's and their children the same foods they eat? Do you feel they are entitled to the treats that we have given up? Or do you fear that giving them those treats is going to land them exactly where we are now as adults?

Not looking for a debate, just interested in everybody's point of view.

Personally, I FEEL so much better when I'm not eating processed foods. I see them (in excess) as a path to heartdisease and diabetes (not to mention obesity). So if I'm to view this as a healthy way of eating-as opposed to a weight loss diet, wouldn't it benefit my family as well? I hadn't given this much thought till the last week. Here I am eating eggs and veggies for breakfast and my kids are eating waffles with syrup and/or sugary cereals, and I felt BAD about it. My 10yo was eating a Flavore Ice and offered me one, I said "No thanks, I'm trying to eat healthier." Gees, I hope she wasn't thinking that I only care about my OWN health-eek

I don't want my kids to feel deprived. None of them are overweight but that doesn't mean they're eating *well*. All I know is that I feel like a hypocrite altering my own diet in the name of good health, and not theirs in the name of social acceptance. Soooo for now my plan is to make gradual changes-switch to less sugary cereals, more natural yogurt (as opposed to the ones they eat which are dyed blue and pink-lol), no soda-will dilute fruit juice instead, and start offering them more veggies with their meals-no pressure to eat them, just have them available. And maybe eggs and whole wheat toast for breakfast twice a week (which they love). I'm not going to ban sweets but instead will pass on what I've learned the hard way-which is they want ice cream or a little candy-fine! But to have it after a balanced meal (not when starving and in place of nutrients, just waiting to trigger a craving)

What does everyone else do?

(Ok by now you're thinking-what is up with this NEW girl and her loooong posts?! )

I'm a single mom and I'm not up for making 2 different kinds of meals (way tooo expensive!) My dd eats what I eat for the most part. She's a scrambled egg lover so eggs in the morning with a piece of toast for her and she's good to go. Some mornings she asks for a poptart or some cheerios, but mainly she wants eggs.

She also is a HUGE salad eater, so a piece of chicken breast with a salad for dinner and she's happy. We don't really do junk food. The kid would beg for Ho-Ho's at the store, eat one and then the box would sit there for a year, so I rarely buy that stuff. I have SF fudgcycles(sp?) and Jello for my snacks and she loves them. She's also a huge fruit eater, so there's always that in the house.

I've found that I didn't go out specifically trying to change her ways of eating, but she's done that pretty much on her own. She just wants to eat what I eat and since that's healthy food, that's what she gets.

FYI: Friday night is ice-cream night at our house. I had originally bought some SF ice-cream, but you know, mint chocolate chip is the kid's favorite and the SF and regular just don't compare, you know?

I think the bottom line is: if you provide a good example, your kids will follow what you do.

Kel

My dh eats what I eat, plus rice. It's all pretty healthy. He doesn't like chicken breast, so I tend to make a chicken breast dish for my lunch. He takes leftovers from dinner.

It's taken some time to figure out how to do this, he didn't like a lot of the recipes I was using in the beginning-from the book and cookbook. He'd say, "Taste healthy. Don't make it for me, if you want to eat it, go ahead."
I took my regular recipes and adapted them.

Sarah

I think that sounds totally reasonable myself. I don't have kids and actually had this discussion with HB. I don't want to deprive my kids because that's one of the reasons I feel I have gained so much weight: I went nuts once on my own and never learned to eat the right way -- I mean, everything is ok to an extent in moderation, right?

Sometimes I feel that had I been allowed chips growing up (in moderation) I wouldn't sneak away and eat them when my parents fought (and then later, just because I wanted to defy my parents).


I think that when I am a mom, I'll want my children to think of candy and salty snacks as treats that are ok to have once in a while.

My sister was really strict about sugar in her house when my nephew was growing up. The first 2 years was all natural no sugar, no salt. They didn't routinely have junk food or candy around the house as he was growing up. Outside the house he could have what ever he wanted. He would go to a birthday party and have a piece of cake and not finish it because he didn't like it.

He's 30 now, and still prefers an apple over a dessert.

Wouldn't that be nice?

I don't have children but my mother lives with us. As far as what they eat is pretty much whatever they want to but we all eat the same thing for dinner and that is always an OP meal for all of us. On the weekends I always do the same thing for breakfast for all of us but for them I make toast and for me I cut up a cucumber. Or for dinner I will add extra veggies to mine when they are eating french bread so something like that.

I don't have a family of my own yet, being only 19, but I just had to say...jenn, how right you are. Although I am not skinny, a lot of it through genetics and weight gain through some anxiety medicine...I BASICALLY learned how to eat things in moderation. We were never deprived ice cream...but it was a special treat. I remember on Monday nights, we would spend time together as a family, then my sister and I (the only ones old enough at the time) sat at the table and ate vanilla ice cream with chocolate syrup. Other than that we got candy at the movies, occasionally a donut on Saturday mornings...but we didn't have a stock of junk food in the house. I think it was a good balance of indulging when appropriate, and saying no when unneccesary.

I suppose I start you thinking of this thread with my reply huh LOL

I don't feed my family the same things I feed myself. I would never eat a box of mac & cheese (my kids don't even like it) but I always keep a few boxes in the house for dh. I buy a can of pringles from the store every payday for my boys to share, they have a few everyday with lunch or snack until they are gone (or dh finished them off). I always water down my 1yos juice and he only drinks 8oz a day, the rest is water. I didn't do that with my 6yo and regretted it later when trying to get him to drink more water, not that's what he has all the time, he's really not into juice. When we go out, my 1yo has water (or juice we bring) in his cup and my 6yo has sprite, when the sprite is gone, he gets water.

Most nights after dinner my 6yo asks for dessert and if I say ok, he has to wait for his brother to go to bed at 7 before he gets it. Occassionally, I buy ice cream but mostly I buy the frozen fruit on a stick, I can't think of what hey are called. A lot of times for lunch both of the boys get dessert, this means canned fruit in fruit juice. I do buy peaches in syrup sometimes but I rinse them off before I put them in their bowls, dh thinks I am nuts. My baby doesn't get candy but my 6yo does every so often.

I make things like muffins and waffles for breakfast for them to have with eggs or fruit, I don't think this is unhealthy at all. DH likes to make breaded fish sticks once a month or so, my kids love them so why not?

I used to buy danimals drinkable yogurt for the baby but now I buy regular yogurt and water it down, it's the same thing! I DO think that in the case of eating sweet things, I would rather them have sugar than something we may find out later causes problems. I use splenda and agauve but I try not to give the kids anything with artificial sweetners.

I think anything in a limited quantity is ok. I know some parents that feed their kids hot dogs with mac/cheese 5 times a week and NEVER veggies, those are the parents that should be worrying. We don't live on convenience food but my kids have corn dogs at least once a week. Now that I have typed this out, I really think they are getting a balanced diet, healthy eating with only occasional junk.

I know this doesn't have anything to do with south beach but your sig says your a birth junkie, are you a doula?

My kids eat what I eat. I don't have time to prepare 2 different meals for the family. I never buy chicken nuggets, corn dogs, fries, or anything that I would consider not a healthy meal. My kids favorite veggie is asparagas (both kids). I have so many friends that have children that won't eat anything "real" because they always got a "special" meal for them....The parents always ask how I get my kids to eat what we eat. I tell them, they have never had a choice. Now, the other night I made spaghetti squash, and they said it was gross (it was!!), so I made them something else. I ate it because I felt like I was throwing money away if I did not eat it.

I do not deprive my kids of ice cream or treats on special occassion. But, they do not get it on a regular basis, and they never get soda.

Great replies-thanks! And yes Fl-I'm a doula!

I agree with kyemom on the choices for food. Growing up my sisters, brother and I either ate what was prepared for us (always a well balanced meal) or we did not get dessert or anything else for that matter until the next meal. We only got ice cream or a candy bar once a week, dessert was mainly some kind of fruit with whipped cream on top. My mom bought 1) 2-liter of pop for a family of 6 to share which equates to 1 glass for each person every week and she NEVER purchased sugar cereal. Growing up I hated this and always loved going to my friends houses because they got all this stuff and if I was there, I got it too!! Now that I have 3 kids of my own, I find I have followed my Moms way of doing things!!! They do get treats but they are very limited and usually low in sugar, they get a glass of pop maybe twice a month when we go out for dinner but usually opt for choc milk. My 7 and 4 year olds favorite vegi is an artichoke which is great cuz SB has alot of recipes that uses them. Some of my friends ask how I get them to eat so many different fruits and vegis and different meals that I make and I just tell them that I dont give them a choice, I will only make 1 meal and you either eat it or wait until the next meal. If they try something and just dont like it, I dont make them eat it and will usually replace that item with fruit or vegis but they have to at least try it before claiming to not like it!! I dont feel my children are deprived of snack foods, they get cookies, ice cream, candy and other things just in moderation. My Mom always told me I would appreciate the way she did things when I became an adult with my own children and I never believed her thinking I would let my kids have all the stuff I wanted to eat growing up. She was right cuz I'm just like her but unfortunatley I couldnt tell her as she passed away when I was pregnant with my first child, she's laughing now saying I TOLD YOU SO!!!

I grew up on hotdogs and mac and cheese most meals or fried bologna sandwiches with mayo. Veggies were canned green beans, corn, iceburg lettuce salads drenched in full fat salad dressing or wilted spinach which is spinach with hot bacon grease and sugar poured over until the spinach leaves wilt. Sometimes peanut butter and jelly on white bread. Veggies were not really a big thing in our family. It's a miracle I turned at as well as I did.
Sarah

I was wondering if anyone else has this problem, my kids are lactose intolerant (as am I). They don't drink milk and are lucky they get a small amount in their cereal. They can tolerate yogurt and cheese but not a lot.

My boys aren't big on green veggies, except broccoli which is their favorite. The little one will eat most except brussel sprouts, he really likes spinach w/vinegar but the oldest likes basically corn and broccoli only. We also have the rule that they try everything, 2 bites minimum, and if they don't like it, they don't eat it. DH thinks they should have to eat a whole serving anyway since 6yo says he doesn't like things just to get out of eating. It certainly gets harder as the kids get older.

Maybe try...you must eat the same # of bites of something as you are old...Like 7 years old, 7 bites of spinach!!!