BethC , 04-06-2006 07:45 AM
Hi everyone! I just thought I'd share this. I'm addicted to "The Biggest Loser", and Jillian Michaels (one of the trainers) has a daily motivational e-mail that you can subscribe to on her website.
Anyway, today's e-mail struck a cord with me since it's the biggest difference that I have found and it is what I credit with making this time so sucessful for me - support! We are all lucky to have each other here, but I've also created a network of IRL people to help me when I hit a rough spot.
So, I wanted to share Jillian's message with all of you...
Someone to Watch Over Me
To chase down big goals like losing 50 pounds or more, you've got to make some major lifestyle changes. Some shifts are easier than others. Trading your chips for air-popped popcorn might be a little easier than getting up at the crack of dawn to exercise every day. That kind of change? Well, you might need a little extra support.
To help you keep your feet firmly on the path to successful weight loss and fitness, find someone to look up to — someone whom you trust to educate you about health and fitness, give you advice and answers when you're feeling lost, and stimulate your sense of possibility and potential.
My role model was a fellow student at the karate studio I attended. Four years older than I, he was smart, funny, charismatic, and one **** of a fighter. He was testing for his black belt while I was wearing the blue. I took to him immediately, and he became my mentor — the big brother I'd always wanted but never had. I admired and looked up to him, aspiring to follow his example.
The easiest way to get instant support is to hire a personal trainer, but you don't have to spend a lot to get the support you need. Look for a sponsor in a local support group or a trusted friend who has been there, done that — basically, anyone whom you respect, and who has the knowledge you need and the ability to challenge you and keep you moving toward your goal.
Don't Be Shy
Many people are afraid to approach strangers with questions. Don't be! If someone isn't interested in mentoring, he or she will let you know. If that's the case, simply move on to the next expert. Most people, however, are flattered when asked for their advice, particularly if it's about something they've worked hard to achieve or something that's their life's passion. Mentors are also good about hooking you up with other sources of information — Web sites, books, other experts, and more. Before you know it, you'll have a network of positive support!
I hope it helps...it crystalized some things for me.
Have a great day!
Beth
Even if it's not a mentor-type situation, just having someone to encourage you and give you ideas is a huge help. Or having someone who doesn't mind diet-talk all of the time... I hate to bore my family with my constant diet updates, but it's all I'm thinking about these days... so I love to come here, where I can prattle on about it all I want!
-Lala
Thanks for sharing Beth. This is oh so true. I think that is why I failed in the past. I never had anyone that could relate to what I was going through.
And even now I don't get a whole lot of support from family and friends. To be honest they all get bored of the whole diet talk.
I will honestly say that coming here has truly kept me on track. Although I don't have anyone motivating me face to face the support and inspiration I find here has kept me going. Anytime I feel that I'm struggling or have a bad day I come here.
Sometimes I don't even post, I simply take a few minutes to read through some of posts and suddenly things are better.
Thanks again for sharing
Leec
Sandi , 04-06-2006 04:34 PM
That's a great post Beth! I know my family and RL friends get bored by the constant diet talk. At one point hub had to sit me down and explain that as important as this is, we must talk about other stuff too. Poor thing. The ladies at work always seem to be dieting so that helps. If it weren't for this site, I would certainly be much, much heavier.
It makes sense, and I agree with it, but I think that is easier said than done. Except for 3fc, I have no support....
My husband supports me to the best of his ability, but since he doesn't understand what I need, it is difficult for him to provide it - however he never, ever drags me down because of my size or when I "wander". My parents are more supportive than they used to be - my mom has never been truly "fat" ever in her life and encourages me the best she can; my dad has been there, done that and only ever tells me that I need to lose weight (which, DUH, I know that!).
The close friends I have that I see on a regular basis aren't interested in weight loss, and think that it is a black and white issue. Other friends that I see often would most certainly attempt to sabbotage me if they knew of my efforts (this has happened in the past, they are fat too and don't want to see anyone else lose weight).
I have worked with a personal trainer before, and although I haven't had one-on-one sessions with her in a while, I do see her often when I am at the gym and her recognition of my efforts makes me feel good.
Otherwise - for my day-to-day, hour-to-hour, get up and go exercise, blah-blah-blah - I am my own support and motivation. All the changes I have made have been done without any help or support, and even sometimes against an up-hill battle with not only myself, but everyone around me.
I was (and still am) relieved to find this website. You guys here help me when I think all is lost. Whether or not I post about what is going on in my life, I know that I can come here and find people who understand, who have the same issues that I do. I just wish this was a real life support group - not just online.
Good post...I am gonna have to sign up for daily motivation too!
Thanks for sharing Beth!
I agree with Buckettgirl - for the most part (other than this website), I'm my own supporter and motivator. My husband is behind me but he too truly doesn't understand what I need. My parents and siblings are very encouraging and right there to step up with a compliment, but they too don't really know what a struggle this is.
I'm very greatful for this website and to everyone here as well!
~Dee
Luckily I have my mom doing this with me. I think its the best thing that we have ever done together. It does help talking and supporting someone thats close to you. When we first started in Jan, I got my mom, my sister and my niece doing it with me. Well.. sad to say ..my sister and my niece stopped (I knew that they would , sad I know). So now while my mom and I are looking good, my sister and niece are kind of upset, but I told them that if they are serious about losing weight that they can start up with us again...no such luck yet. Im sure they will come around when they are ready.
I also love this site. Everyone is so great.
I agree wholeheartedly! I'd be lost without my boards and the constant support.
I hear you about the "diet talk" getting old to family and friends. That's why I have two Live Journals -- one for "normal" stuff and one for all the health stuff. Whenever I post a long post here or on another board, or something really hits home, I post it on Live Journal, too. That way I can get it out of my system, AND keep it as motivation for when I get into discouraging times (which happen every couple of months, it seems), AND I don't push my family away with all the diet stuff.
I think support is an often-overlooked aspect to lifestyle change. Just having people around who can say they've "been there, done that" is more encouraging that I can possibly state. We KNOW what it's like to huff and puff just to bend over and tie our shoes. Or buy the practical clothes rather than the fun ones because we know the belly is going to stain and pill up from being rubbed against things. Or "chart" our way mentally through a crowded restaurant before we begin moving. My family doens't know that. They can't. And I hope they never will, because it would mean they are as heavy as I am.