anyone else? everytime i start a new "diet" i do well at the beginning. i lose a little weight and feel great. people notice and compliment me. i am about 6 weeks into south beach diet and i am back to my old habits. I eat well in front of other people because I do not want to seem like a failure to them. for example at work i always eat salads or something else healthy and if there is a cake or donuts i either do not eat any or sneak them when no one is around...in front of my fiance i eat well but when he goes to bed i am searching the cupboards for something "bad" to eat. when i am alone i eat candy bars, ice cream, fried foods, etc....i make special trips to the store to buy food, eat in my car and then throw the garbage away before i get home so my fiance doesn't know. but it is so obvious, since i am not losing any weight! he does his best to encourage me. I actually get depressed because i cannot eat foods like spaghetti or pototoes. literally ready to cry! I feel like this is not normal, but i have been like this for probably 6-7 years, so I do not know what "normal" is.
i am getting married this year and i really want to look good in my pictures. i hate having my picture taken and i want this one time to be different, but i feel like i just keep screwing up. does anyone have any advice? thank you in advance.

Maybe you'd be better off counting calories so that you can eat any kind of food you want as long as you keep under a certain number? Then you can save up for a treat and not feel guilty about it. I reckon journaling is a good way to be accountable for what you eat. You also have to forgive yourself if you mess up. This is what works for me.

I was always a closet eater. Even as a child I always binged in private and put on a show for the rest of the world, like people couldn't tell just by looking at me that I must be eating an enormous amount of food when no one was around. You are completely normal and you are not alone. I think you may benefit from a support group like OA or TOPS, or even WW. A place where you can talk to others who are going through exactly what you are and understand how you're feeling. And if you're a little more private, like me, you can just stick to the forums here at 3fc that make you feel most comfortable and at home. There is so much support here, and people who can totally relate. Just know that you are not alone, and you can overcome this. Good luck and take care!

Beverly

(FONT=Comic Sans MS]xxx[/FONT] I never really thought much about it till i just read what u wrote here , but i think I do the same thing.. I never paid attention to it till just now .... I think thats part of my self sabotoging.... dont have any answers tho, but ur not alone ..

I have to agree with Beverly. If I was on a diet that restricted the type of food I ate, I'd become so obsessed about eating that type of food that I would end up binging. I'm much better at sticking with a plan where I can eat what everyone else eats- just less of it. It doesn't make you a failure to want certain things; it makes you human.

You need to pick the plan that works for you, even if the plan you are already on works for a lot of other people. I'm a carb-aholic so I won't even try something like Atkin's or South Beach because I would feel deprived and not be able to stick with it to maintain my weight. Honestly, I doubt I'd make it without my precious carbs for a week

Hi there
I share your frustration. I too have the same problem, I do really good all day and then blow it!!! At my highest weight, I used to tell my fiance I was going to the pharmacy to have an excuse to take a ride at night. I would then go through burger king and eat 2 cheeseburgers before going home!! This was after already eating a normal supper!! My body does not need the food, but for some reason Im not mentally strong enough to fight the mind games!!! Even now having already lost 50lbs, I still fight with it. I have made great improvements of course, but I still will do good all week and then on the weekend, buy candy in the store and eat it in the car on my way home, so that no one sees me eating it. I should know Im only hurting myself here, but I dont learn. No matter how hard I try to get over it, the urge is contantly with me.
Jewels

jewels and others, thanks for the replies. i have tried telling myself today "it's not a big deal, it is just food, it is not a big deal." This is my way of taking back the power food has over me. I actually feel like it helps! I have only tried it this morning and I feel pretty good and actually passed up free doughnuts and muffins twice today without feeling like I am missing out on something.

It is nice to know others out there do the same thing but still can get past it and lose weight. thanks!

Oh my goodness...I have the same problem. I would eat a complete supper and go take one of my children to practice or to friends house and I would stop and eat at a fast food restaruant. I really gave it no thought on why I was doing this, just thought it was because I loved the taste of the food. I finally took the time and asked myself "why do you need that whopper and fries?" It usually was because something was stressing me out, or I was upset about something..or bored. I have gone on the OA website and relize that I have a very addictive personality. I am currently going to TOPS meetings and trying to follow a 12 step program. Just take life minute by minute..

Dont deprive yourself.. Give yourself one meal a week that you can have what you want.
Usually on Saturday me and my family go out to eat to whatever sounds good or whatever someone wanted thur the week.
Like a burger we go to a local resturant called Fudruckers.
We have dicovered that their ostrich burger tastes really good and we get it with a baked potato with salsa the burger is 97% fat free or their Turkey burger is really good also.
We go to a favorite pizza resturant called Pizza Papolis that we have a deep dish pizza but made with low fat cheese and it tastes great.
We call it our cheat meal and most of the time the changes we made to the food dont it make it a cheat meal.
We noticed that our last trip to our fav mexican resturant we consumed way less of those chips they give you, Usually we would have gone thru three bowls we couldnt even finish the first bowl. And I only ate half my meal.
Substatute your red burger meat for some Turkey meat and season it and it taste better than a burger.
Chicken Faijtas can be made with a low or no fat tortilla.
Taco bell makes a great Chilpote Taco seasoning that makes the turkey meat taste really good for a nice wrap.
Read the labels and get the extra lean meat.
Vary the foods you love and the food can be very healthy.
I love to snack on a few almonds they fill you up nicely.
But dont deprive yourself you dont have to just have that food for that one meal a week and you wont feel deprived.

I too suffer from self sabotage...I can't tell you how many times I've started out on a diet, done well and then blew it once people started complimenting.
SO, the counselor I see asked me one day...why do you feel you don't deserve to lose weight?....good question! I don't really have the answer...although maybe I do but don't want to admit it quite yet.
Part of me thinks that I don't want to lose the weight because it will attract men who'll want to date me and if I start dating, it would feel like I was cheating on my husband who died 3 yrs ago....maybe....that comes to the forefront of my head each time I think on it.
This time, I have started and just told myself to take it daily, vary my meal plan so I don't get bored, have fun with it!, and above all else stop thinking of it as a diet and just keep repeating it is just the new healthier way I eat!

Good luck to all!
Lisa

Hi! I have done the same thing (closet eating) MANY MANY times. It seems mostly for emotional reasons. I have a job that exposes me to people in very sad and lonely situations, and I find that after I am with an especially "needy" person, I overeat!~ One thing that has helped me lately is (believe it or not) is eating regularly--like somethign small and healthly every 2-3 hours. It's a blood sugar thing, I'm sure. Just don't beat yourself up, and keep searching....Good luck! Pat

I have depression. The very cause for my depression is my eating, and my inability to control myself.
I really do hate myself. And my habits reflect it. For instance, today, I did a 4 mile walk, ate healthy all day...but then I binged on a whole brand new pack of premium plus crackers and 5 egg rolls. I do that everyday. My pants just get tighter and tighter by the day, and the people around me worry about me because it's so obvious that i'm putting on the pounds.
HOW do you deal with this?

Have you gone to a doctor about the depression? If you can treat the depression, it might help with the binge eating. I know I am definitely an emotional eater (evident from the fact that I gained nearly 70 pounds in less than a year and a half after moving to a new state).