Hello all!

I have lost 30lbs in 3 months and I am absolutely thrilled with my progress. I have never tried dieting before but one day something clicked in my head, this decision was a strong foundation and while at 3 months this is early days, I am not struggling with my diet plan or slowly increasing my activity levels and fitness though I still have another 40lbs to go.

What I am struggling with is the mirror and clothes! At 20lbs I noticed my clothes were much looser and now at 30lbs down, I look awful in my old things. The problem is I have not lost weight evenly which to my eyes has made me look far worse(not that I intend to put the weight back on!). My legs have slimmed down far faster than my stomach and hips. While I *know* my stomach has shrunk, when I look in the mirror my gut looks like it sticks out far more than it did before and I now feel far more self conscious about my size than when I was 30 lbs heavier.

Whenever I have tried on new things I get a brief moment of self congratulation for fitting into a UK size 14(down from 16/18) but when I look in the mirror, all I see is my shelf-like belly. Like there are big neon flashing arrows pointing at it.

I naively thought that when I lost weight I would rejoice with every little change but I am finding this rather tricky.

Would love to hear from people who have gone through the same!

Thanks all! xxx

Hm. The mirror can be so tough to deal with. Perhaps go by measurement instead of what you see? Even if you haven't been measuring, you probably have old pants that are so loose in the waist now that you can't wear them without a belt, or perhaps wear them at all. Use those as a benchmark of how much you've lost in the gut area. And definitely focus on the positive. Focus on the areas that are most defined and congratulate yourself on your progress!

Thanks for this! Definitely been pushing to think positive eg. always hated having ridiculously large breasts, now have reasonably large breasts ! I have been measuring by an old pair of pyjamas-not the most accurate measuring device for my waist - but it has helped gauge what has gone. I do know that my stomach has shrunk just struggling to see it!

May I ask how you lose the 30 pounds?

Sure! Well I am quite short so in order to get a calorific deficit of 500kcal a week I had to drop to 1200kcal a day and removing junk/sweets and upping veg and lean meats. The first week was horrible, painful and all I remember is being hungry all the time but that week was the most important because every day I was testing and trying different things to make the diet work for me as well as testing my resolve. In the end I found what was most comfortable was to almost fast during the day, 500 kcal spread out over breakfast and lunch, 100 for milk(I drink a lot of tea) and leave 600kcal for dinner. This meant that not only am I not going to bed hungry, my partner and can have the same dinner. Some would say that you should not have have so many calories late in the day but for me this was comfortable, I find it far more satisfying and because I know every day that I have a decent meal at the end of it, I don't obsess about food as much. I have not removed carbs from my diet, I don't believe that cutting out dairy and carbs entirely is good for you but I have lowered both and I switched to wholemeal carbs.

I have been very lucky that my partner who is not overweight by any stretch of the imagination has been enthusiastic about having dinners that involve less carbs, majority veg and less fatty meats. It would have been a lot harder to maintain and afford if he had not been on board and we had to cook separate dinners every night.

I am not a gym goer, I am still a bit chicken about going to those palaces of healthiness, sweat and perceived judgement. I hope to go eventually but for now I am getting more comfortable with my body and learning to push myself. I have upped my activity levels by using the kinect, walking everywhere, using weights, and sometimes I will go for a jog or a cycle with my partner. I am fortunate that I live in Scotland so twice a month we go on a big full-day hill walk and return all sore, sweaty and inspired. I am working up to a walking holiday with my best friends in April where we are going to do 2 legs of the West Highland way-a doable challenge but when we do it I want to be fit enough that I don't feel like I am holding my much fitter friends back.

It looks like you are starting or have started your own 'journey', do you have a plan of attack?

Hi, Weething, and welcome! Regarding the mirror, I have plenty experience in the past with gaining and losing weight. I've noticed the same thing. When I start to lose weight, I suddenly start to see the fat, which for some reason I was oblivious to when gaining. So, when gaining weight, I used to think I looked thinner than I did and when losing, it was the opposite. I can't really explain it. But I will say, that in my case, after a while my self-image did catch up, so keep at it!

For an approach, it sounds like you have almost settled on One Meal A Day, which is a form of intermittent fasting (which has a bunch of potential health benefits in addition to making it easier to manage weight). Congratulations! After literally decades mostly white-knuckling it with calorie counting and tiny "meals" spread through the day (and trying and failing with Atkins and a few other approaches), I ended up at OMAD and for me it's been a game changer. Even if you have no interest in changes, you might drop by our OMAD thread on 3FC or read some of stuff by Dr. Jason Fung, who practices OMAD and is a big advocate.

Cheers! I'll check it out! I suppose OMAD is similar or close to what I am doing. I am definitely on the watch for something to switch to when I hit the inevitable dredded 'plateau'.
Do you literally eat only one meal a day and nothing else? If so, what/how much would you typically have?

It is so weird the way your mind messes with you when you look in the mirror! Got to keep my head down and keep on at it, I am sure it will all even out in the end.

P.S Wow check you! Only 2lbs to go! Congrats!

Hello all!

Weething, I see so many commonalities between you and I. We're very close to the same height and weight range (I am 5'2" and I have lost nearly 26 lbs in the past 2 months). Plus, I have been very happy to go from what I feel were ridiculously large breasts to reasonably large breasts! That has been a huge plus. But for some reason, I find myself looking at my arms saying, hmm...these don't look so great. Why do they look fat? I agree, its a very odd feeling especially knowing you can look away and put your head in the sand while you are gaining but as soon as you start to become yourself again, you become critical.

I am trying to focus on the positive and really, seeing the areas I where I still need to lose just inspires me more. I have started lifting weights with my husband who has all the equipment, he's always been a lifter. So I am seeing that make a difference. Plus, I have signed up to run an 1/2 marathon with my son (please, what was I thinking?) in May. I won't let him or myself down!

Just as an FYI, I also keep my calories low, between 900-1100. I am using the Medifast program which allows me one meal a day as well supplemented by their meager amounts of 100 calories "fueling" It works and has kept me from being hungry while giving me the added nutrition I need on a low calorie diet like this. It just gets boring. I think another 4 weeks and I'll be ready to wean myself off and go with regular food but keep the calories in the 1200-1300 range.


Stay the course and keep going!

Sheila

26lbs in 2 months is fantastic! Well done! Excellent to hear from someone with the same problems, there should be a big breast survivor club on here! Thank you for replying. You are right, the more you lose the more you look in the mirror with a critical eye. It is hard when you are so happy with your progress but at the same time dislike yourself more in the mirror. I am losing weight for a number of health related reasons but I would be lying if I didn't say that looking better isn't one of the main reasons, I worry that as time goes on I will never be truly happy with what I see in the mirror, that no matter what size I am I will always fixate on something to criticize.

I have never heard of Medifast-is that one of the powdered-drink style weight loss programs? 900-1100 sounds like a proper challenge, how do you find it day-to-day? I found that when I went any lower, I started to get listless and irritable.

It is great you have a supportive husband, my partner has been fantastic with all of this and watching him sweat alongside me absolutely helps!

Had to stop and say well done! You've done amazingly, don't let the mirror be the thing that knocks you off your game. I agree that you should use the things you can measure to help your view of your amazing changes. Do you have some "skinny clothes" that you couldn't bear to throw away before, but couldn't fit into? I would imagine that, with a 30lb loss, you'll either fit into them, or it won't be the pointless exercise it was before (I'm very much projecting here...)

I wanted to ask about how you did this though, you said the first week was hard. Would you mind telling me more about this? Was it just a case of accepting that you were hungry, and that settled after the first week? How did you help yourself when you felt the hunger? I think I'm about to have that week, and I want to help myself succeed!

Hi BoredNotHungry!
Thanks for your advice, as for skinny clothes, I just put on a pair of jeans for the first time in a decade-a small jump for many but I have avoided them for so long as I never felt comfortable in them and today I feel like the bee's knees .
With the first week it was a combination of will power and tea that got me through, I wish I had more solid advice than that.
When I got hungry I would first try to distract myself(walk/xbox/reading) and wait and see, if the feeling didn't go away(as sometimes it would just last 15 mins and vanish) I would go drink some tea which normally did the trick.
I had fruit-tea for when I was craving sweet things between meals and mint and ginger teas, regular tea with milk for the other times. I found it really helped as a lot of the time you are just bored or you are thirsty. It might sound silly but I turned the act of boiling the kettle, picking a favorite cup and selecting a tea into a kind of meditative ritual, really taking my time over it. It was distracting and restful when I was all anxious and hungry but just straight will-power for the rest. The more I exercised my will power, the more empowered I felt. I felt like I was taking back control of my life in this small way and it gave me the confidence to continue. This being said, it is important not to let that feeling go too far or else you just end up at self punishment, the aim is not to suffer.
The first week sucked but with each day that passed I didn't want to waste the progress I had made, I knew I would settle down into this new regime as so many have before and to give up would only mean starting over and going through it again. If you are looking for a weight loss buddy you could private message me? I know I would welcome some extra support and I would be happy to do the same for you.

Hi again! Sorry for the late reply. What happened with me is that I decided to try an "eating window." It turns out there are lots of good health reasons to restrict the amount of time throughout the day that you are raising your blood sugar and it helps a lot of people lose weight. I started out easy, with a 12 hour eating window. Whenever I was comfortable with a schedule, I'd notch the start of my window up a half hour. I didn't really plan on getting it down to a 1 hour eating window, but I did, and I love it! By eating all my calories in one meal, I have a fabulous meal and I can eat out with friends and order what I want. By adjusting my schedule slowly and on my own timeline, I didn't have to go through severe hunger. Now that I am adjusted to my schedule, I do start to get hungry about an hour before dinner (5:00 for me) but I can wait it out. =)

Outside my eating window, I mostly rely on coffee/lattee with truvia and NFPM, teas of various sorts, water or diet drinks (esp when I'm on the treadmill, walking while browsing the web-- like right now!) or broth or purreed cabage soup (only 10 calories per cup) when I want something salty. Like you, most of the time one of these things does the trick but honestly, I rarely get very hungry outside my eating window. My husband has an 8 hour eating window (he eats lunch and dinner) and that has worked out well for him.

So, I know you aren't really doing OMAD, but you do get some of the same benefits by putting most of the calories in your main meal. For me, it's primarily about compliance. I really love knowing that I can have a satisfying meal every day, that I can eat dinner with my family for real, and that I can enjoy eating out. This is not a diet-- it's my lifestyle. When I was dividing my calories into several mini-meals, I never felt satisfied, and if I did eat out, after eating one glorious meal, going my to my 300 calorie so-called "meals" felt like torture. Now, honestly, I enjoy the meals I eat at home as much as those I eat out.

I'm glad you found an approach that works well for you in a relatively quick timeframe. I'm afraid I wasted literally decades on other approaches (mostly calorie couting/eating several times a day). They "worked" but they were pretty joyless.

I think I've crashed this board since I realized you are in the UK and I am in the states but that being said, we're all here for the same basic reason so hopefully it ok that I crashed.

Medifast does use shakes, bars, and other packaged foods with some similarities to Nutrisystem. The main focus is on eating every 2 - 3 hours and with the MF foods that are about 100 calories each. They are fortified with protein, vitamins and minerals to help keep you from feeling hungry and missing nutrition and keep your blood sugar level. Once a day you have a "Lean and Green" meal of your choosing that has lean protein and low carb veggies and some healthy fas that you make yourself. That meal is about 400 calories. Once you lose some weight or in my case, as I started to exercise more, I started to sub out a shake or a bar for another Lean and Green meal often at lunch. So that style of eating is called 4 & 2. I alternate between the 2 depending upon how I feel.

I don't think there is a one size fits all diet approach. Yoyoma has an approach that obviously works great for her which is wonderful. I've now begun to use this diet more as a tool to help me transition back to eating in the real world. For example, yesterday I had lunch with a friend and ate a small salad with oil and vinegar dressing and a piece of quiche. Generally the carbs are not on the diet plan at all. There are no breads, fruits or sugars in the hard core phase of this diet. But I ate the delicious crust and enjoyed every single bite of the very moderate portion. For dinner, I ate all veggies to compensate for the crust in the quiche. I am trying to learn to balance my choices every day and use the Medifast foods as a backup.

Sheila