Hi Everyone,

I'm Indie. 2013 I was the healthiest I've ever been a muscular size 0 and incredibly happy with my life. However, I was then diagnosed with lupus and everything changed. I was on so many medications and had a doctor for every part of my body. The weight gain made me angry because I felt I had worked to loose it and get to that size (I've always been rather small, but gained weight after some personal problems during my first years of marriage).

With the lupus I became angry and one day last year I gave up and then the pounds piled on even more so. Next thing I knew I was a size 20, which doesn't even fit my 5'2 frame so as a result my skin stretched in ways I'd never seen. I hated myself, and knew that if I didn't make a change the disease and it's associated complications would kill me. So in the last year I've lost over 50lbs, just walking.

More than anything I want a baby, but I know that weight adds to the already established dangers of having lupus. So I'm upping the game this year, so that I can be healthy enough (for me) to be healthy. I know there are some women who would be ok with having a baby at this size, but I know that I wouldn't be able to enjoy that time of my life if I'm unhealthy.

I've never utilized anything like this for help and support, but I need friends that understand, that encourage and push. So it's great to meet all of you.

Hi and welcome and I'm sorry to hear you are having medical troubles that can hinder you from having a child. In my case what could hinder me from having a child is a huge mixture of physical, mental, and sociological blockages. Sociological meaning, I'm 31, never been married, not really a dater, stuck in a town and region of the US where I'm either surrounded by people who are too young (which around here, a lot of the young people get married and have children like right out of high school), or surrounded much older people that I also don't much in common with. I also am overweight and unfortunately hinders me from getting dates. I unfortunately also discovered a few gray hairs hinding under my top strands. Medically, I'm morbidly obese, have PCOS, and mental issues. Not to mention sociologically speaking I don't fit in with the "hillbilly" stereotypes of my hometown. I also have ideas above my social class/station in life. So I basically need a miracle to happen to have a child.

Welcome iprep!
Hope you find what you're looking for here, and I hope things get easier for you with your medical issues & prescriptions and so on. That sounds really frustrating and difficult.

I don't want to but unfortunately it seems like the men I want to procreate with the most have gotten married to women that I don't compare well to.