I am 25 years old but I feel like I'm going on 50 with all this excess weight on me. I have always been a big girl. I definitely have a problem with bad feelings and overeating. I was left alone a lot when I was little and I got lonely and would binge eat. I would then feel ashamed and hide all the evidence. No one really said anything or tried to help me. That stopped when I was in 8th grade. I joined the field hockey team and I slowly started to get into shape. I loved it. I was still always bigger though... I was a size 12/14 at my thinnest. I would still eat whatever I wanted though. My father would buy everything that was pretty healthy. We always had wheat bread, skim milk, no butter, no soda. We would also be either hiking or whitewater kayaking every single weekend in the spring/summer/fall.
But even at my smallest, I even remember my aunt asking me if I was bulimic because I was "so small". Of course I wasn't, but I can't say I didn't think of it.
After high school, it went all down hill. I didn't have field hockey to rely on for exercise, and I wasn't living at home, so I didn't go on the weekend with my father on our usual retreats. I moved in with my boyfriend, who then was working construction and was in really good shape. He would however eat WHATEVER he wanted. Buffalo fingers, pizza, 2 liter bottles of Coke... everything that went straight to my stomach, my thighs, my butt, my back, my arms.
I know it's not an excuse, but its pretty darn hard. Things were about to get EVEN harder. My boyfriend and his family BOUGHT A RESTAURANT. Not even just a restaurant... a pizza place. Seriously. We moved and I worked with him 5 days a week, 10:30 - 10:00. Now if you can imagine, or course I didn't even cook dinner on the days we were working, we just ate whatever we had at the pizzeria.
By this time I had gained 100lbs. 100lbs. 100lbs is the equivalent to one of my high school best friends. Seriously. She was tiny. It's like I've been carrying her around on my back for the past 6 years. That's way to long to be carrying around all that extra weight.
Anyway.. to present day. June 1st I decided I was going to start eating healthy. 3 meals plus a few small calorie snacks. I want to keep my calorie intake under 1800 calories, considering I've probably been eating 2500 - 3000 calories a day eating ANYTHING I wanted. And also start exercising because I just don't.
June 1st I had a total of 1400 calories, not on purpose, but just by choice of what I ate. I wrote everything down in a book and entered it on my IPod on my Lose It app later that night.
June 2nd I had a total of 1800 calories, and my lovely, now husband (who has probably put on 80 lbs too ) had to have taco bell, so I did eat there, but had the fresco chicken taco.
So in these 2 days I have lost 4.6 lbs. Does that make sense? Is that even healthy? I figure you guys will know best.
Thanks so much for taking the time to read my boring post. Talk to you guys soon!
I totally hear you on the significant other's eating habits making things challenging. I moved in with my boyfriend about 6 years ago and have gained almost 100 lbs... oy. It feels horrid! Feels much worse considering he hasn't gained a lb! Just a naturally thin person I guess.. eats burgers, cheese steaks, snacks all day etc. He always says he wants to eat better, so I hope he will bring less into the house.. but my blood pressure is up, not his! LOL, slowly learning to cook for myself. I can prepare my own dinner if he wants to go get himself a cheesesteak that is fine. Right? I don't need to order the fries with cheese, bacon & ranch dressing..