I noticed something the other day that gave some insight into the impulsive thoughts I have when it comes to food, that I never really noticed before. But now that I've become aware of it, I can see how this thought process has given me ammunition to eat anything I want, whenever I want, however much I want, and hence, lead to weight gain. At least, I think so.

When I arrive to a craving, or I'm in a situation where a, let's say, "not on plan" food enters into the picture, and I decide I want it. I start feeling a sense of urgency arise that I MUST eat it because it's limited in some way. Not even that someone else will get "the last one" although that happens too, but a general sense of, "Oh I never have this so I need to have this now." except there are so many different kinds of bad food out there that you could go on forever with that mentality. And that's what justified me to eating Mac & Cheese at restaurants, "Well, I never get to have it and it's my favorite... I must get it!" But really, if you really look at how many times I order it while eating out, it's a lot more than I'd like for myself to believe when I'm convincing myself to get it.

Now that I realize that I do this, as before it was second nature and I didn't think about it too much, I thought of a new response: "I don't have to get it this time, It's not like I will never be able to have it again." and you know what? So far it seems to be working.

Last weekend I went into Dunkin Donuts with my husband. He loves their coffee and gets it pretty frequently. I already ate my breakfast, and went over my calories the night before. I knew a donut wouldn't be a good choice for me, and I wasn't really hungry. But I wanted one, so I was planning on getting something. However, once I was standing in line I started thinking and I said, "You know, I don't have to get a donut here. It's not like I'll never be able to have one again, I just need to plan for it and make it a special treat." and Poof, I got up to the cashier and just got the coffee for my husband.

Since then, I've been applying that to all sorts of high-calorie foods I used to indulge in on a regular basis, but tricked myself into believe that I didn't.

THAT ASIDE, what other self-sabotaging or deceiving thoughts have you had that you finally realized and put an end to? I'm sure I'm not the only one!

That is great! Good for you

I totally agree with your analysis. I had the problem of all sorts of yummy things showing up at my work place every day...donuts, cheesecakes, muffins...you name it. All things that I dont EVER let into my home but are so tempting at my office for 3 reasons honestly.

1. They are free and most times expensive items that I could not afford to buy...Lie #1...I work hard...I deserve this perk
2. They smell so darn good and look so tasty...Lie #2...The skinny girls are eating them...why can't I...
3. I am bored most times and something yummy breaks up the tedium of my day....Lie #3....the sugar buzz will perk me up and burn itself off in the increased activity that its calories will generate...PLEASE!..

It was a vicious cycle and getting out of hand! So I took a ZERO tolerance policy and designated ANYTHING at work that I did not bring from home as BAD for me. I nick named the donuts "talking snakes" and took a completely different view point on them and their impact on me.

This association has helped me break through the cycle of over indulgence and failure in the face of temptation....

The devil is in the donuts....ha!

Rakel, I had the same realization myself a few months ago. My struggle was the bakery section of the grocery store. Every time I went to the store, I would pick up a box of cookies or some cake or other "treat". Except that they weren't treats; they were almost daily indulgences.

Finally I realized....the carrot cake is ALWAYS there at Safeway. Every time I go, there are stacks of freshly made carrot cakes, just the way I like them. So I do not have to get it this time; it will be there next time I go and I can choose to have it then. There is no shortage of carrot cake or cookies; they will always be there so I don't have to get them every time I see them!

I'm sure this sounds really funny to people who don't have problems with these types of foods, but it really was a epiphany to me that I could simply tell myself, "Maybe next time." As time goes by, the call of the bakery department is fainter and fainter, but I did notice the other day (when I was stressed), that I was really tempted by a box of Halloween mini-cupcakes. I really wanted to buy them. But I reminded myself that this store ALWAYS has the mini-cupcakes and I can buy them in the future if I wish. So I passed them by. It's a victory!

good Q. yes, I'm guilty of it's my favorite, I have to have it thinking.

I have gotten the thought in my head of there's only so much more of X food, I should (or need to) finish it (in a bag/in the pot/in the box/on the table). My new response, there's a huge supply of X in the world, I don't have to worry about getting MORE or that I'll run out (more can be made, if it's a dish; more can be bought, etc.).

I know what you mean. I delay as well. I have also been try9ing to transfer my thoughts of indulgence (mostly) onto other things. I tell myself, "I never watch a double feature so I am going to do that.." and I do. I tell myself, "I never buy the more expensive pillows" so I do. As for foods I am trying to enjoy the sights and smells of them as much I once enjoyed the taste.

I hope something I wrote here makes sense to someone besides me!

ETA: Also, I really enjoy preparing foods and knowing all I can about foods. Now, instead of my Paula Dean creations I create gorgeous whole foods recipes as a way of indulging the FOODIE in me.

TBG, it makes perfect sense to me. It is OK (more than OK!) to indulge oneself sometimes. We do work hard and it's really OK. We just need to remember that there are lots of ways to indulge and pamper ourselves that don't involve unhealthy foods.

I love watching Paula Dean cook. I love the way she uses butter and cream and sugar with wild abandon. But when I watch her, I think of a spoof I saw once on a TV show, where someone was pretending to be Paula and for desert, she served a stick of butter sandwiched between two glazed donuts! It was all done in a teasing (not mean) spirit and was very funny, but it served to remind me that it's fun to watch those shows but probably not a good idea to use her recipes too frequently!

Exactly, that's why I tell myself that I can have it again, I just have to plan for it. It's okay when it's on my plan and in moderation, but it's not okay to eat impulsively, because that's what leads me to trouble. Chocolate, cookies, cake and ice cream are fine in their place, which is NOT every day, multiple times a day.

And actually, I never really cared for donuts that much, it was just something I ate because it was there. I mean, they are GOOD but when I'm budgeting my calories, I realize that there are plenty of things I'd rather eat for 200 - 400 calories than a sugary pastry.

Rakel, I think it's wonderful that you were able to step back and observe your own throughts and see how they were harming you and devising a means to change them. That is a huge insight. And of course this technique can apply to any thoughts that we have that harm us. Some people, their whole lives, never realize how they are contributing to their own downfall.

Absolutely, and I realize now this is the sort of thing that made the difference between maintaining my previous 40lb loss, and gaining it back... which unfortunately, I had to gain it all back in order to learn my lesson.

This is exactly how I feel too! I need to start thinking the way you are thinking especially around the holidays! Mom's awesome pumpkin pie will be there next year for Thanksgiving...I just have to repeat that as my mantra this month.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts! I feel a lot better about the holidays now!

You're welcome!

You know... I've had some reservations about starting again right before the holidays. I was thinking that I may be setting myself up for failure... but then I thought, if I can lose weight now, then I can do it ANY time because I am never more tempted with sweets and overeating then at this time, when everyone is focused on food. It's the perfect time really. And REALLY, there isn't anything that you eat during the holidays that you couldn't make for yourself any other time of the year.

Yes. Exactly. There is no shortage of these foods in the world. Not now or anytime soon. Right now, while in a weight loss journey, ESPECIALLY in the early, grab control stages, there's just no place for em'. At a later time. Down the road. In a different setting. But now, your job, your mission is to shed those pounds and there's just no room for that kind of stuff. You're learning new and healthy habits. You don't have to have something just because you see it and just because you want it. That is no longer relevant. You require more from yourself. You are raising your standards. You want to become that health minded person who just doesn't eat anything at old time. And you are apparently well on the way.

PLAN for them. Yes, this is such a key component of a successful journey.

Eating what I WANT at the time, instead of what I PLANNED to eat, leads down the path to weight gain for me.

I have very few foods I no longer eat, but I have a lot of foods that I eat very rarely. And when i do, they are always part of my plan.

on finding an important key for success on YOUR journey

I use that strategy a lot too. "This is not the last time I will be able to have this." Especially when I just want something for the taste, but I'm not hungry, or I'm bored or something.