oh sweetie. I do want to tell you I understand your dilemma here. I went through something similar. And I still fight with the occasional need to binge on junk. However, cutting it all out is NOT the answer. Especially if you have tendencies to binge without it for too long.

I am dieting, and the way I am handling my love for sweets. Is to incorporate two of the ones I normally have the most trouble with into my diet plan. Icecream and cookies. I usually have one cookie and 1/2 cup icecream a day. Yes a day. If that is what it takes to get you onto the path of eating healthier...then you should do it. Don't do something you know is going to backfire on you!

You may want to start by figuring out exactly which foods set you off completely. As of April 2005 I had to stop eating what I call "pure sugar" candy. But to break that addiction (and I know that's a strong word but it absolutely is), I ate large quantities of sweet foods that were not triggering the same feelings. So I ate a lot of cookies, cake, chocolate etc. to stop myself from going for the jelly beans or gummi bears. I did break the candy addiction but obviously did not drop a single pound during the process. However, now 4 years later I was able to start a weight loss program that is not also fighting my addiction.

And I have promised myself I can eat all the candy I want once I reach 80 years old. So I'm not saying I can't ever have candy again.

What's worked best for me (at times - I'm kind of struggling with my food choices at the moment) is to forget about the "rest of my life" part, and focus on today.

While I know losing and maintaining a healthy weight requires a "lifestyle change" and that most of the choices I make are going to be permanent ones, I also know that things will shift over time.

If I approach this process as though each change HAS to be permanent, HAS to be an all-or-nothing, now-or-never part of my life, I go crazy. If I want something unhealthy... let's say ice cream... and I refuse myself on the grounds that "ice cream is bad.. I can't have ice cream" I spend the rest of the evening dwelling on the fact that I want it, I can't have it, and, if I succeed in the "permanent" factor, I will never have ice cream again... and end up feeling terrible and giving up on the grounds that it's too hard (and typically going way overboard).

On the other hand, I've learned I need to take things day by day. If I want ice cream (and haven't prepared/budgeted/planned for it), I try to remind myself that it's not in my plan for the day, that there will be other days when I have ice cream, but that I need to learn to control my sugar craving for now. That it's not worth it, today.

As long as I look at every day and every choice on its own, rather than allowing things to get out of hand (I can NEVER have X again... well, that sucks, I can't stick to that), I have a better grip on the situation. And, if by taking things one day and one decision at a time, I end up never having ice cream again in my life (which I DON'T think will happen - but it could)... well, I'll only know that when I reach the end.

I cut out sugar completely 9 days ago! I am definately an addict.. Most of the time I can handle the cravings, but then when I see something like cookies in the lunchroom, or someone eating ice cream on a blog everything just rushes back to me!
I confess, I did just buy a container of cookies and cream ice cream, but I will only be eating some AFTER I work out, shower, and eat dinner. I also bargained that if I am to have any sugar I have to start running again tomorrow morning.

Anyway, good luck with whatever you decide. I really do think it is possible to be as addicted to refined sugar as it is to drugs, seriously. But... it is also possible to get over that too!

[QUOTEI mean what do i do? how do i get over this fear of giving up sugar.][/QUOTE]

What is there to fear? The sugar food will always be on this earth. It isn't going away, ever. I tried to give up sugar for 2 months. I didn't realize how addicted to it I truly was....I ate it as little as possible. Then, I made substitutes like dried apricots, skinny cow ice cream bars, or 90 calorie rice crispy treats if I needed a sugar fix.

I think it is easiest to give it up cold turkey and use natural sugar foods like fruits to substitute your sugar cravings. When you don't feel as drawn to it, go out to a restaurant and order something you love...that way you can't take any more home with you.

It is totally doable and you really won't die from it. It is more freeing than anything to not let some sugary item rule your life. Good luck.

Don't think of giving it up "forever" just yet. How about a trial run of 6 weeks or something like that? Make a deal with yourself that you will give it up for a set period of time and then re-evaluate when that time period is up.

Some people can continue to allow a small sugary treat every day because they find that helps to keep them from binging. Others find that even that small treat is enough to keep the sugar craving and binging alive, and need to give it up.

Because it seems to be causing you to binge even to have a little bit, why not give it a trial run? If you don't like the way you feel at the end of the trial period, you can always go back to sugar because, as others have noted, sugary foods will always be there. I'm guessing, though, that it might be like my potato chip addiction was. Once I was able to tough it out and not eat them for awhile, I quit thinking about it.

I say give it a try. Sugar will always be there and you can always go back to it. If 6 weeks seems too long, then try 2 or 3 weeks. Best of luck to you!

Hi hon!

It is so great that you've identified a food that gives you such darned trouble. And it sounds to me like sugar to you is more than just a "food" -- it is a friend that is always there, that gives you a bit of a boost when you are sad, and something that you can rely on. So no WONDER it is TERRIFYING to give this up! But just keep in mind that it seems to me that sugar isn't just "sugar" -- it represents something else much much bigger, and THAT is where the fear comes from...

All I can say is that there are lots of people who have found that they need to rule sugar completely out of their lives. And they have been able to do this. So it is DOABLE..

I just want you to think, for a moment, about this: what if you went for a physical and the doctor said "I'm so sorry, you are a diabetic. You need insulin, and you can't have any more sugary treats ever or else you will die."
I think you would do what would have to be done. So maybe realize that for YOU, sugar is just as harmful as it is to a diabetic.

And a mourning period is NORMAL. We ALL go through this. When I got down to 200 lbs, I spent a good month being really, REALLY ANGRY and SAD. I had to let food "go". I had to find new coping mechanisms. I had to look elsewheres for my "friend" that was always there. And that totally pissed me off! It was so UNFAIR. WHY ME? How come I couldn't eat what I wanted without consequence...but you know what, I mourned my loss, and I moved on. And after a while, with a new lifestyle, uncontrolled eating just wasn't an option nor was it "appealing" after a while. Food assumed a LESS IMPORTANT role in my life. I'm pretty sure that after a while, the same will happen for you and sugar.

I think that if you realize that sugar for you is ruled out, that sugar for you is harmful and destructive and just as dangerous for you as it is for a diabetic, that you HAVE to let it go for your HEALTH, and if you mourn a little bit, you'll find new coping mechanisms and life will roll along.

I feel for you and I have confidence that you WILL do the right thing, for YOU...



Kira

I totally understand what you're thinking. I almost went off plan the other day and over to the grocery store because I was contemplating the word "forever".

I think it's difficult because people say that to lose and keep it off, you need to think of it as a lifestyle change, and not a diet, which makes total sense. However, on the flipside of it, there is that looming idea of "forever" and "never again" that make the whole thing seem insanely overwhelming.

The thought of never having that fullness I get from a binge again makes me want to binge!

I don't now how to deal with that, because it is really scary. I guess that's part of the process. Sorry, I realize that I have said nothing to help you, but maybe it helps to know you're not the only one who feels this way!

Kira- really beautifully said.
I wish there was more information, or people talked more about that type of mourning. - am finding myself hovering in and out of a mourning period myself.
I haven't restricted any food, but I find now that when I do incorporate some of my old 'friends' because I think I want or need them, they no longer 'work' the same way they used to. Part of it is that my tastes have changed, but there is something else going on that I can't quite put my finger on.

Anyway-it is upsetting to lean on an old coping mechanism only to find that it is now broken.

These are good things to think about. For many of us, food isn't just food.
I completely understand your fear. If you decided to give up sugar, whether through restriction or however, it will be a good idea to start thinking about the benefits you got from the sugar, how you will cope without it and what way you will cope instead of it. This way you will be ready and prepared (and not freak out a bit as I did )