Okay...so my daughter has had this girlfriend since first grade. The girl has had this hold on my daughter since then, where I only have ever felt that she calls my daughter to play when her other friends are busy. When they go places with school, Suzy never hangs out with Shelley and Shelley ends up hanging out with me, waiting till Suzy gives her time.
So, enter middle school...and now Shelley has a new best friend, Tori. Tori is a year younger than Shelley, but lives around the corner from us. In the elementary world, the grades rarely intermix because they just don't...but now they ride the bus to the middle school together and were in summer marching band together and have become fast friends. I've known the family on an aquaintence level, for about 6 years and they seem like a really nice family. Four kids, stay-at-home mom, dad has his own business, camper in the front yard...a really normal American family. So, I was happy when Shelley latched on to Tori because I was really glad to have her lose her hold on Suzy's time table and all that.
So...a week and a half ago, Shelley asks if she can go to the mall with Tori's family and told me that she and Tori will probably be off on their own shopping and I thought...they're preteens...and the parents are there and they both have cell phones...that's okay. So, they went and all was well and Shelley had a GREAT time with the $20 I gave her. Then, this weekend, Shelley's on the phone with Tori and Shelley asks if I could take them to the mall...but Shelley tells me in confidence that Tori wants to meet a boy she likes at the mall and that the boy is going to bring a friend along and that Tori wants to all go to the movies...two boys and two girls...all preteens. I said NO! and Shelley seemed relieved, as if Tori had been putting some pressure on her and the excuse that her mom said no took her off the hook. I profusely thanked Shelley for being honest with me and encourage her to continue being honest with me.
So...yesterday, Shelley's on the phone with Tori again, asking if they can go to the mall with Tori's family on Thursday after school. I said, "As long as Tori's family is going...who else it going?" And she told me that the boy that Tori likes is going to be meeting them there. And it came out that Tori's family isn't really going...and then to add insult to my intelligence, Shelley tossed in that now the mother of the boy that Tori likes (his name is Storm...I wondered if he had a sister named Gale ) is going with them.
First of all, does she really think I'm that stupid? Second of all, what the heck happened to nice, little Tori? Now she's got me losing trust in her AND Shelley and furthermore, has Shelley glommed onto, yet, another user? I know Tori's mom has told me that she's happy Shelley and Tori have become friends because Tori was hanging around with kids that she was getting in trouble with and she likes me and Shelley and is glad that Tori has become friendly with a new family. But now I'm thinking that I don't trust Tori and worry that she's going to drag Shelley to the dark side.
WHAT DO I DO?!?!?