I've had most of the internal dialogues at one time or another. It's not the elliptical that get me anymore, I've made peace with it. Dare I say I actually like it.

Today I decided to venture out of my boring walking/elliptical routine, and tried a cardio kick-boxing class. Well, let's just say I looked at the clock every minute and thought only 40 minutes to go, only 39, only 38....

Funny things those little voices

Mine is usually loudest in my head during lap swimming ...

Okay 20 laps, you can do it. <hops in pool> damn that was colder than I thought, hmmm wonder why? maybe no kids peeing in the pool today, that's refreshing. lets swim. I wonder if I look any better in my swimsuit then I did last time I came swimming? No I can still feel my thighs rubbing together, did I scare any small children with that image? <looks to the kiddie side of the pool> no, phew. Oh hey a non-senior citizen just got in to do laps. Oh I remember him he is a power swimmer that kicks and splashes a lot. I bet he thinks he is a chick magnet yea but why does he wear swim trunks over his speedo? Doesn't he know he looks goofy like that, waiting to get in the water to take off his trunks and then swim in a speedo. Oh hey 10 laps done! yea, half way there. Look at all those cute little lifeguard girls. Wonder if they are going to get cellulite when they have kids? That would be funny. BAD for being mean. Oh man these laps are getting hard, keep going. I wonder how swimmers keep such good rhythm and breathing, I should search that on the internet when I am done. Oh hey I outlasted every old person swimming laps, yea take that grandpa, ha I am a dork! Yea you are. Keep swimming two more to go. Hey I should add 4 more laps, that is another 100 yards and it is more calories. Keep going. Hey that sounds like that song in Finding Nemo, Just keep swimming just keep swimming. Dang now I can't get that out of my head. Thank god the laps are done. I am heading to the hot tub now.

I tell myself that I will be happier about doing this than I am about almost anything else one day.

I do a lot of Richard Simmons workouts. I put up pics from a Victoria's Secret magazine on the side of my TV so I can say things like "I wanna wear a tank top like that." This may not be a healthy way to do it, but it works when I am ready to give in.