I got the lectures from my doctors, I read the information about negative health effects, I listen to testimonials from those who are obese. It was a frightening thing to hear, and when I was immediately post-partum, it jump started my diet and gave me the will to lose that first 15 pounds. I thought once I started, it would be smooth sailing.
I saw no change in my size from losing the 15 pounds. Not just that, though, I don't 'feel' fat. I am in excellent physical condition. I have stamina, endurance, low blood pressure, low cholesterol, good muscle tone...just alot of fat that won't go away. It's so hard to be dedicated to this when I don't actually feel obese. I see myself and it's depressing - the way I look doesn't match the way I feel - but the depression makes me turn to chocolate (like today!).
This isn't meant to say that everyone is fat but me. I AM fat, but I don't FEEL fat. How do I get over that and realize this is more than just a vanity issue? Telling myself that and knowing it are one thing, but I need to live it. I just can't get to that point.