I'm pretty new here (have posted a few times in the WW core area). I've been looking through the threads on depression and weight loss hoping to come across something or someone with a similar issuse. Here goes:
Normally I'm the happiest person you'll ever meet, and I'm thrilled with my weight loss (160 pounds), but I don't think I was prepared for the emotional changes the go along with losing so much.
I spent my entire young adulthood in a state of morbid obesity, so I've never seen myself as a "thin" person - EVER. I still can't see myself that way. I'm instictively picking up the 3x clothes or shopping in the plus sizes because that was my only option. My body is fixed but my mind is sill there grabbing the biggest pair of jeans available and hoping they'll fit.
My second issue is that I'm fast approaching "goal" and finding myself sad that this part of my journey is almost over. I really enjoyed feeling that sense of accomplishment when I weighed in and lost weight. I Loved every step of the journey so far, so why now am I sad? I should be ecstatic, but I'm not. I'm finding myself thinking "what do I do now?". I find myself afraid of the next step (maintainence). There are irrational fears of waking up one day and finding out that all the weight came back. (this can be dangerous - I'm well aware of that)
I committed to this lifestyle change, and I'm determined to remain committed. Part of my staying committed means that I need to lose the emotional baggage that came with a decade of morbid obesity. This kind of baggage will bring the weight back if I don't take care of it now.
How do I "break my old mirror" and see myself the way way I am now?
How do I get past my fear of "maintainence"?
Why am I so afraid of shopping for things that actually fit?
Where to I go from here? <---that one's a biggie - reaching goal was my brass ring. I think maybe I need a new ring to reach for.
I'd be interested in hearing from anyone who is close to, or has reached maintainence and has dealt with these feelings before, or anyone might be feeling something similar now. I'm still happy, just a little frightened of the future, and a bit of reassurance might be just what I need.
Thanks in advance,
Jane