I feel like I am slipping, everything is coming before me again. NOT GOOD. I haven't exercised, seems like there is no time for me. I know its my fault and I am very angry at myself, at everyone. I feel like I am eating too much too often and not the best foods either. I don't think I have lost any weight in a while now. Most people at 9 months out are almost at their goal weight, and I am only about half way there if I am lucky. Am I the 1 person that will still fail after having this surgery? Sorry if I am such a downer, but I have no one to talk to. I missed the support meeting this month because I had something else to do, again, my needs came last. Any suggestions?

Misty,

I think this is an ongoing battle for most, if not all, of us.

One thing that has helped me is to get support and information from the various boards here at 3FC. I highly recommend Ladies who Lift and Maintainers. Eating well, exercising, and generally making ourselves priority is an ongoing theme for ANYONE who wants to be healthy, not simply for those of us who have had WLS. While our dietary and supplementation needs may be different than others, the emotional and simply the physical side of doing what needs to be done is very similar to that of others.

The phrase, "if you don't take care of yourself you won't have anything to give anyone else", is true. It is just so EASY to do for others first, but eventually the well does run dry.

The surgery is a tool (no matter which surgery), the rest is up to us. We have a choice, we can be thinner and unhealthy or thinner and enjoy better health.

One thing that helps me is to do one thing at a time. Make one change at a time. One small change really can make a difference. The whole "perfection" attitude is really tough. We don't have to be perfect. One better choice makes a difference, then two, then maybe three. And if we backslide, we just start over again.

Take care,

Dawna

misty... dawna is right.

but the next part of the question is how to do this... i've learned a new technique over the past few months from a really fabulous boss at work. it's about goal setting and identifying what has to happen to meet those goals.

soooo. let's say that one of your goals is to walk for 30 minutes a day. but you're putting anything and everything ahead of that.

so sit down and figure out how you're going to get those 30 minutes in between all the zillions of things you have to do.

let's say you have to do the grocery shopping, 3 loads of laundry, take your son to school and pick him up. make dinner. clean two bathrooms. and i don't know what else..

where's your 30 minutes? well, the washer in this house takes 45 minutes to do a load of laundry. so i could clean the bathrooms OR take a walk OR take my son to school [during one load]. multitasking.

i guess i'd have to sum it up by dragging in the nike commercial - just do it! and heaven knows it's not easy to just do it. but we gotta figure out how.

soooo. how about posting your day and let's see what we can all brainstorm. it's so hard. i don't want you to think for a second that i have it all figured out. the one thing i DO know, though, is that it has to happen.

and as for 'everyone else' being at goal weight. darlin- look where you started!!!!! you've already LOST where everyone else started! you are doing fine. but ya gotta stay focused...

Thanks Dawna and Jiffy, guess I need to get refocused. I definitely have lost my way. I did manage to up my protein drinks, which cut back on my food intake for the day, which is a good thing, but I still haven't exercised, just not motivated I think I am depressed.

darlin... if you think you're depressed, you probably are. and it's actually quite common to get depressed after the surgery. apparently, it's something about the biochemical changes that happen with the rapid weight loss that knocks our chemistry off.

soooo. get some help. it's important.

and make sure you're getting your b complex. i found that increasing that helped my mood...

Thanks Jiffy, I will......