I'm not a big loser yet, since I'm only around the halfway point of my journey, but I wanted to share my experience with this, in the hopes that it might help. I knew from the start that it was going to be a really long road, and that I was bound to have slip-ups or crises of faith and motivational slumps along the way. The longer the road, the more likely it is that you'll run into these road blocks. So I just approached it with this knowledge, and just kind of forgave myself in advance, but made the commitment to myself that I wouldn't wallow in it or get sidetracked; I would have the inevitable slip-up and then brush myself off and move on. I just really try to always keep my longterm goals always at the front of my mind, and really congratulate myself for my successes along the way. Every single day I log my food and assess my progress, and I write in my journal about my goals and how I'm feeling. I look for patterns in my cravings and changing levels of motivation, and I just really focus in on how I'm going to achieve my short-term and long-term goals. I remind myself that I knew it wasn't going to be easy, and that it's natural to be less motivated some times than others -- but I'm never going to get where I want to go if I lose sight of how much I want it and give in to the easier, off-plan route. I remind myself that it's hard work, but that it will pay off. And since the start, I celebrate every little bit lost -- they add up!!
Just this past weekend, I returned from a 3-day holiday a full 5 pounds heavier! I had intended to be mostly on plan, but succumbed to temptation and spousal pressure and just kicked back. Not an all-out binge, but for me, it was pretty darned relaxed! So when I came back and saw that bump on the scale, I wasn't surprised, and I knew I just needed to jump right back on a strict plan and hold myself to it. I've worked too hard to get waylaid by 5 stupid pounds! So I hit it hard, and 5 days after that gain, I was down 4 of the 5 pounds!
I know EACH of us is capable of regaining focus after a lapse or a setback. I really think it's a question of psyching yourself up again and again and again....just keep talking yourself through your decisions, and don't let your goals shift from anywhere but the very FRONT of your mind. IT is the priority, above ease, above taste, above convenience, above the pressures of others (hello Sarah!), above everything.......your loss is the priority. No matter what the objection: "But that _______ is SO hard to resist!" ; "It's just really hard to find the time to ______!" ; "But I'm just not losing it quickly enough so why even bother?" ; "I'm just too tired to exercise." ; "I can't pre-pare my meals because _____" --- to name a few --- No matter what the objection, the response should be, "Does this response help me to reach my goals, or hinder my ability to reach those goals?" That's the litmus test, the decider.
For me, my motivational tool is determination, plain and simple. Some days it's grim determination
and others it's a smooth ride -- just business as usual.
Glynne, I think you're just going to have to make up your mind that reaching your goals is more important to you than getting recognized for saying "no thank you." Your health is more important! It will get easier with practice, I swear. Do these people know that you're trying to lose weight? Maybe if you could speak to them one-on-one and express that you're really trying to take care of your health, and would very much appreciate their support in not offering you food. I really think they would understand and respect your efforts to take care of yourself. As for not being able to imagine yourself thin, I've heard that from others also. I don't really think that's critical to your success. Can you imagine zipping up a pair of jeans 2 sizes smaller than you wear right now? Can you imagine walking up 6 flights of stairs without getting winded? Can you imagine getting up out of bed without grunting or breathing funny? Start with those, and the thin visual will follow, Glynne, I really believe that.
I'm writing in the quick reply box, so I can't yet tell how long this is -- but I suspect it's REALLY long!! I sure hope this helps....it's definitely how I've made it this far, and how I will continue to progress going forward through the next half.
Glynne, I send you hugs
and all the very best -- if you ever want to talk privately, feel free to PM me -- I'm here for you anytime.