The Last Straw

  • Hello,
    I have been on here before, but what has transpired over the past week has made me return.
    I was to be married very soon to a wonderful man, who was giving me a beautiful wedding..something I have always wanted. Long story short, when my wedding dress arrived, I took one look at myself in the mirror and knew I could not stand in front of people looking this way, much less stuff my face with cake and look happy, knowing what people would be thinking. I then and there cancelled venue, cake, minister...the whole thing.
    I do not understand the disconnect between motivation and action. I WANT to be thin and healthy. I want to live the life a thin person knows...so WHY do I get up each morning and not do anything about it?
  • Oh gosh, honey, that's terribly sad! I'm so sorry you felt you couldn't enjoy a day to celebrate the love between you and your fiance just because of extra weight! Weddings are no more about "perfection" than every-day life is! We are all imperfect and we are all deserving of love! You are deserving of love and a beautiful, gorgeous wedding to celebrate it Right This Minute, no matter what you weigh!

    Sending you hugs , I'm sure you are feeling so down about this! You can definitely take control of your weight, make the commitment to yourself TODAY that going forward the goal to be healthy will be foremost in your mind and actions!

    Yes, it will be challenging, we all wouldn't be here if it was easy-peasy, but you can do it!
  • I know exactly where you are with the wedding thing. I was in the same boat. know that i'm almost at my goal i realize that it never was about the wedding, It wasn't my weight but my self worth as a person. If losing weight makes you feel better than i say go go go!
  • I agree with the poster before me! I am so sorry about these feelings and the disappointment that robbed you of the moment of feeling beautiful in your dress. I think it's fantastic you have set a goal you are so passionate about but you should not have to fear what your loved ones think of you on a day as special as your wedding day.

    When you look in the mirror, that's you. It's always going to be you. Even if your body size changes, weight, clothing, hair, you're always going to be you. Rest assured that the man you are going to marry thinks you're beautiful in any state and I hope you can comfortably celebrate your love soon without having to worry about any of this.

    Is it really your loved ones and the people watching you eat the cake or is it a little voice inside of your head picking on you? Don't let anybody make you feel that way, even if it's you doing it. Feel wonderful and beautiful all the while on your journey, even if you have to practice outside of your comfort-zone to do so. Please be careful not to get into the deadly cycle of making yourself wait to do and see the things you love based on you being a weight you're unhappy with. Just appreciate and pamper your body and know you're going a healthy direction with your weight loss.

    Now, all that aside, welcome to the forum! You just took the first step to "doing something about it." You're on the road, baby! Enjoy the ride!
  • This is terrible I'm sorry that you feel this way, but please know you are not alone. Personally speaking, I felt this same way weeks ago. I hated the way I looked and felt but did nothing. Finally, I made the decision to take action. That's all we need to do.. is take action. You can do this. Set up a plan and do it!!
  • Wow, I can sooo relate with you, I too have missed so many partys, bbqs and events because I couldn't stand the way I looked. I wore a dress for a xmas event first time in 20 years. My knees were shaking so bad I couldn't walk. Lol. I look forward to doing this journey with you.