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Originally Posted by Pinkhippie
Now *Im* crying. I hope that realization helps you. I know what you mean about feeling compassion and understanding because of them surviving a lot. I am actually right now working on realizing that I am very angry at my mom and realizing that its OK to be angry at her. I actually feel guilty being mad at her for how she treated me because she went through so much horrible stuff as a kid, and that is why she is the way she is. It's crazy isn't it how it really isn't all about food like we think it is.
Oh boy! My mother was a yeller and would chase us with wooden spoons but I never felt really afraid of her at all. She passed away when I was 11 so maybe that's why I don't feel that way towards her. I'm a yeller and after reading this from you all, I can see how it can affect my children - I try really hard not too and am adamant about stopping the cycle with what my father did.
neglect, neglect, neglect after our mother passed. Food was my friend, caretaker, parent, everything (along with the TV and the books I could forage). a therapist helped me get past my continual anger at him by helping me see that he is a little on the special needs side. He does not (nor did he back then) possess the mental or emotional capacity to raise children or be a parent. This has helped me so much to forgive him.
Something that made the hair on my neck bristle on the back of my neck was the comment "this is how they were raised" - yep it was but they made a choice to not stop the cycle. I was raised like this and I will do everything in my power to stop the cycle for my children whom I'd do anything in world for. Then again, special needs - they probably just didn't have the emotional capacity to do this. THANK GOD WE DO or least we all are trying......