Michele, I would assume the hosts were paying. In fact I hosted a shower 22 years ago at a tea room with a few friends and we did pay for the meals. I just saw on FB that the baby who the shower was for just graduated from college so thats how I know it was that long ago!

Michele, I'd ask, to save embarrassment later. Listen: I've got affluent friends who are extremely mindful of etiquette and order their stationery for thank-you notes from the same stationers that their parents and grandparents used. They'd pay. But I've also got far less-well-off family members who just don't think this way, & who'd think such a gathering is like spontaneously meeting up in a bar, where everyone pays for their own drinks.

Michele, I would assume I would be paying for my own tea etc in that situation. I've been to a number of baby showers at restaurants, more than at houses actually, and they are always pay your own way.

Interesting the mixed opinions. I think the other host and I have agreed to split the costs for everyone. Now I have to start thinking about baby boy decorations, etc!

Michele - I would assume no. I've gone to several baby showers at tea rooms and restaurants, the hosts have all paid for a few appetizers and non alcoholic drinks, and usually brought a cake, everyone else paid for their own.