I have a pattern.

I'm a fairly in shape person. Most would say really in shape. But I binge.

My pattern is this. I will go through a period of maybe 3 or 4 months where I am binge eating 3 or 4 nights a week, always at night. I will get depressed and it increases. I reach a low point then climb out fairly quickly. I reach a peak where I am not binge eating as much but still "give" myself 2ish binge meals a week.

At this point I will reach a high point of being more in shape. Then suddenly more binge eating starts creeping in. I suddenly go from one big binge cheat a week to two then three then I cross this line where I feel like I literally cannot control myself at nights.

Last night for instance I had only been back on eating healthy (after 3 or 4 days of CRAZY unhealthy eating while traveling) and I did well my first day back on. Then the second day came and I was still ok but then nighttime fell and I felt such a strong craving that for about 3 hours straight every five minutes the urge was so great I couldn't sleep and even opened the website to order food 3 or 4 times. I didn't do it and I thought ok you've made it through a terrible craving night. Then tonight comes and I get the same craving, same amount of time, and same intensity!

I'm not sure what to do. This binging is keeping me from my goals.

Hey there, I see this is your first post -- welcome!

One thing you could do is see if you have any trigger foods and then eliminate them for a while, or forever, depending on how you can handle them later.

The really physical cravings you speak of come for me with surgary, carby type items. Once I cut those out -- and went through withdrawal -- the constant urge to binge began to decrease.

You may find you have other triggers as well that you can identify and then figure out how to avoid/change them.

It is very hard and depressing, I know. I'm sending you positive vibes, I know how difficult this is to deal with!

Thanks for responding! I really appreciate it.

I definitely do have triggers. Night time is the worst for me.

I don't keep those foods in my apartment at all. One of the down sides of living in NYC is I can have any of my cheat foods within steps or the click of a mouse at any time of night. I literally just have to go on a website, order food, and its here even at 2 am.

The last two nights the cravings got so strong.

I definitely think you're right about withdrawals. I read once that it takes a few months to actually let your body withdrawal from junk food and you have cravings like an addict.

Withdrawals definitely lasted many months for me, for sure.

I can only imagine having infinite choices for food delivered, that's so much temptation. But the first thing to tell yourself is that you are stronger than food, no matter what it is. And you ARE.

You are stronger than food.

Hang in there. I wish there was an easy answer -- we all do. But just take it day by day and KNOW that it will get easier if you stick with it. No matter how ridiculously hard it feels at first (and it seems overwhelmingly impossible, I know), if you hang tough it gets easier.