...only 20-30 pounds heavier.
I had a membership here awhile back, but only posted a couple of times, chucked that email address, gained more weight, and now I'm back. (Not trying to abuse the IP/multiple screenname rule...) Here's my story:
Starting/Current: 240
Ultimate goal: 145
I'm 5'4", 35 years old, have two kids, married, and I'm completely disgusted with myself. I've been thin my whole life and only until my second child (around the time I married my husband) did I just....crumble. Marriage issues surfaced, my son was diagnosed with aspergers, and other personal events piled on daily stress and I KNOW I coped with food and alcohol. I would get determined to lose it, do well for awhile, lose TWENTY...then gain back THIRTY. I know the problem, I know the solution, I know I want to be there, but I don't want to do what it takes to get there. I do NOT get that part other than old fashioned laziness and an unwillingness to face my issues (particularly night time) when everything is still and, honestly, hurts more.
I don't know if I'm saying anything that those of us who are significantly overweight don't already know for themselves (i.e. emotionally eating, self-medicating). In fact, it might help to hear that others DO relate.
I DO want to be my thin, healthy self again, it's just so daunting to think how LONG of a journey this will be, or how many demons I will have to face to get there. It's discouraging to know I could have done the work so many years I "started" before...like, what's gonna be different this time? Will it stick? I think the difference will be community. I NEED SUPPORT!!! I need friends who can keep me honest, and that I can cheer on too!
Anyway...this is my intro. We'll see how it goes. Any tips or suggestions? Thanks for listening!