ok, the atrificial sweetener thing...
I was the queen of artifical sweetners (and also China, but thats a long story) then my hands and legs started to go numb...I lost my balance, I was in constant pain...I was tested for everything and found out it MIGHT BE MS, or not, BUT
there is a condition called 'aspertaime poisioning' (or something) that mimics the symptoms of MS. Some people are altra sensitive to that chemical. Just to be on the safe side, I stopped using the stuff...I wish my symptoms went away, that would have been a great ending to this story, but no...but I don't use it anymore. And I am a crazy coffee drinker. I had to switch to black decaf...thought I would die, but you now what, I didn't! I miss my morning coffee with all the bells and whistles, but knowing that I have one less chemical in my systom is some consolation. (not much) My life has been a series of giving up this to get that...it sucks, but eventually I will be the ME I need to be. I have only had one migrane in my life and if I thought that using artifical sweetners would give me another one, I would run screaming out of the room. anyway, that's my 2.5 cents and then some.

I had a medical scare a few months back and was told by my doctor that I had to cut out caffeine completely for 3 months at least. I managed to switch to decaf and herbal tea, quit eating chocolate and drop coffee with the exception of the occasional decaf.

I now allow myself 1 good fresh cup of real coffee every morning with 1 tsp of sugar and real cream. The rest of the day I drink herbal tea, decaf orange pekoe or Earl Grey tea or water. This is my daily treat and my kickstart to the day

It was hard to do at first but I am so used to it that I don't even think about it anymore. It has also cut back on a lot of my sugar intake.

Up until about a little over a year ago I didn't drink coffee at all and I am thinking that is probably going to be my best bet. I drink enough caffiene in my daily intake of diet soda to wake the dead so.... I am really not suppose to drink a great deal of caffiene in any form so, it would be better for me to cut out what I can. not exactly what I would choose to do though.

Honestly the only way that artificial sweetners bother me is if they are in a hot drink. I can eat or drink them cold and I am fine put in in something even luke warm I am in bed puking my guts up (nice picture) Heck Ginya... If I had to quit chewing sugarless gum they would have to send me to detox.

A

AHHHH I could screw up a wet dream... I was so ready to start over on Monday and by Wednesday, I am need to start over, starting over.... I really hate having no will power. I use to have it, I don't know where it went... It has rained for three days straight, I haven't started walking, I have gotten my water in but it was following the large amount of crappy food that I was eating at the time argh!!!

I will do better, I will do better, I will do better. I am not going to beat myself up too bad, I have had some large stress this week and the kids are loose (school is out) I can do this... I can do this I can do this.....



A
176/170/135

Don't beat yourself up girl. There's no use.

Positives:
You got all your water in.
You haven't given up! That's the big fight, ya know?!?!
You're ready to begin again.

Deep breath! You can do it!

You can do this...I have walked the last 3 days...Go ahead and get an umbrella...walking in the rain can be kinda fun!

You can walk in place at home - I do that when my kids are around and I can't get out...You can do it, Amy! You can start over as many times as you need to. I fact most of us have started over lots of times - I know I have and do. Each day I feel like it is starting over really.

I read something in "Make the Connection" that is about this, sort of. About how all you can ever do each day is do your best for THAT day. Because that is where you are - in this day. So just do the best you can for that day - some days it will be better than others. And there will always be tomorrow to do your best in, too.

Lidian

Today will be a better day. I have already walked for an hour and 15 minutes and I have started in on my water... will keep a post out...

Okay I back tracked my walk with the car today... it was a little over 3 miles... better than I thought. Did some upper body weights.. I drank 98 ounces of water (I am going to be peeing alllll night) only a hand full of chocolate chips no other sugar, ate pretty good- few too many carbs but probably under or at my calories

Did good yesterday. I have to go out of town to a graduation this afternoon, I have to work really hard on being good. Will be running (figuratively) all weekend so hopefully I will not have time to eat to much junk. I will post soon.

Flower ~ How is it going?

Amy

Well, I would like to say I have lost a ton of weight but I haven't... Last Monday I was at 173.5 this AM I am at 171.5 but I was down to 170 somewhere during the week so does that count as a gain or a loss?

I have done pretty good this week, except it is TOM and I have been PMSing and Stressing about a lot of stuff. I have had the IRS audit thing pushed back another 4 days because of time delays in recieving statements from my insurance and the credit card companies. I hope that it goes good.

Well I walked one day last week to walk ~ was actually meant as exercise, several days I had to walk because I had to... shopping looking for graduation gifts then several blocks to and from the civic center to the graduation... walked looking for new corals for our fish tank... Cut the grass front and back because DS was at my brothers this weekend fishing and riding horses. I am sore my hips hurts... I ate good most of the week, got to get back to portion measuring.

I saw a picture of myself that DH took this weekend standing next to my 5'10 skinny (110lbs) neice I looked like a beached whale. It made me really sad. I hate being big... I mean really hate it, everyone but my DH is like oh your not big but I know they are being nice...DH is just blunt- you have a big butt and if you want to lose it quit eating so much... The problem is he is right- and that pisses me off too. Well enough for feeling sorry.

I did alright last week. I upped my activity some, I drank about 100 ounces of water a day approximately 3 liters, plan on continuing that. Can't say I cut down on my refined sugar because of all of the chocolate chips, but other wise I think I did alright.

Well, starting over again today.

Hugs to all,
Amy
176/171.5/135

So, Amy .. you are saying you've lost two pounds in one week, and on top of that its TOM? And that's not good enough!?!?! That's GREAT!!!

And though DH might have a partial point, he is not helping the situation with his less than supportive comments. It is not all about just "don't eat so much." It's about addressing emotional issues, it's about relearning how to eat, it's about relearning how to live, to enjoy exercise, to like the right foods and to love ourselves. Comments like that make me want to slap people. And I find I'm getting less and less tolerant as time goes by. That's probably not a good thing. There are REASONS people are overweight. And unless we address those reasons, we may lose, but we will never maintain.

And so, congrats on your moving towards a whole new life, and may this weeks two pound loss be added to more next week!!

Thanks Raven ~ DH just knows how I am.... he is supportive in everything I do, he is just blunt. Honestly, he is the reason I have gotten as far as I have in life, if it weren't for him I would still be on welfare making minimum wage trying to make ends meet.. instead of a college grad, starting a new job next week. It makes him mad that I have gained so much weight back after I had lost so much... he knows I can do it, he just wants me to set my mind to it and get it done, instead of whining.

Amy...after Friday I am going to join you on this Starting Over. I will need a new breath of life here. So get ready to rumble!!!

Cool the more the merrier....


Did alright today.... working up to 130 ounces of water a day, lord it makes you tinkle bunches....did more necessary stuff today not real exercise unless you count driving and getting blood drawn....Food wasn't the greatest but had to eat on the go so tried to eat pretty healthy but ate too much sugar.

Amy