Hate myself....

  • I have no motivation whatsoever.... not only do I have no motivation but I can't stand even looking at myself. I have done nothing but go up and down my whole life...I don't know how to stop feeling like this. I have 3 children, the youngest is 14 months old. I love my babies so much and I keep thinking I need to do it for them. But not even that gets me motivated. And like I said, I hate myself. I won't even look at myself in the mirror. When I am brushing my teeth, I close my eyes. Even at my thinnest when I looked at myself all I saw was fat. I don't know how to fix myself. I want to lose weight. I want to be healthy, but I can not seem to get off my butt and do it...

    The doctor has me on anti depressants and they make me feel better... but not motivated. My mom had a major stroke in November and you would think that would help motivate me... NOPE.

    Any suggestions? Has anyone ever gone to over eaters anonymous?
    Are there any other counseling suggestions?
  • Motivation is fleeting. You may have it at times, but more often than not, it will be non existant.

    What you need to do is get out and move more. Eat less. If you feel like it or not, to it. Make it a priority just like you would a dr's appt.

    Take the kids with you when you walk.

    Drink water instead of caloried drinks. Weigh/measure everything you eat to control your portion sizes.

    I know how you feel. I avoided mirrors like the plague. I hate not having the endurance and stamina to do things with my kids. I'm 2 months into my journey (this time) and have been dedicated. Even when I don't want to or feel like exercising, I do it anyway and at the end of my session I feel so much better.

    I suffer from depression, anxiety, bipolar and fibromyalgia. I can say that all of that has improved since staying on track with my diet and exercise.

    Oh...and on the occasional day that I make poor food choices, I tell myself it was one day out however many, and make sure I stay on plan the next day. I do NOT let one bad day end all I've worked for.

    You can do this. You just can't rely on motivation to come, or stay once you have it. You have to just do it.
  • I agree with RavenWolf, but in all honesty, I think you should go back to your doctor and discuss how you're feeling, and your options, with him/her. If you hate yourself so much that you can't stand to look in the mirror to brush your teeth, then your medication isn't working as it should or it needs supplementation.

    I went to a couple of OA meetings but they weren't helpful to me. There was too much emphasis, at least in the group I went to, on admitting you're powerless over food. I don't for a second think that I, or anybody else, is powerless over an inanimate object. It was a room full of people sitting around making excuses for why they couldn't stay at a healthy weight and that was not of any use to me.

    Not all meetings may be like the one I went to, but I was unimpressed.
  • I suffer from depression, anxiety and used to struggle with eating disorders. I feel a lot better when I exercise every day. I now don't need to take my old meds (talked with doctor over this). I really recommend you move a little every day, even if you play with your kids on the playground.

    I'm not always motivated, but I keep trying to move forward. All you can do it keep trying every day. *hug* Please don't hate your self, you're a mommy, you work hard and you deserve to like and accept yourself.
  • Quote: I agree with RavenWolf, but in all honesty, I think you should go back to your doctor and discuss how you're feeling, and your options, with him/her. If you hate yourself so much that you can't stand to look in the mirror to brush your teeth, then your medication isn't working as it should or it needs supplementation.

    I completely agree!!!

    I'm so very sorry you're feeling like this! My best advice is to continue to seek help. It sounds as though you're having some issues beyond just desiring weight loss and having trouble with motivation.
  • Sorry you are feeling this way

    Losing weight doesn't require motivation, but it does require dedication!

    I drag myself to the gym 3xweek. I don't feel like going, but I do it anyways. I make myself cook instead of driving to Taco Bell. To me, no healthy food taste half as good as a Nacho Cheese Chalupa, but I cook it and eat it anyways...

    Losing weight is the job that nobody wants to do but YOU have to do it anyways. Think of it as that low paid job that you hate to do, but you do it because it will lead you to better opportunities.

    Closing your eyes won't change a thing. Get moving and try to cut the junk, that will help you tons

    .

    Hugs to you and hope you find the way to do it.
  • I would call your insurance to see if you have any covered nutritionist visits. Also- I need the one on one accountability of a consultant. So I go to the metabolic research center and meet with a coach twice a week. I know everything I need to do...I just don't quite do it. However, if there is someone out there encouraging me and expecting me to find success...it makes a world of difference to me! I started in January and hit my loss of 10% of my body weight today.

    I've also cut out all processed foods and refined sugar. It puts me into a viscous cycle of depression and anxiety that I can't get out of.
  • Almost sounds like a type of post-partum (sp?) depression to me.

    I second that exercise my very well help, but honestly you may need to go seek out some professional advice.

    Don't let a couple of out-of-whack body chemicals rob you of the joy you should be having at this part of your life with your kiddos. Seek out what you need, and make positive changes
  • I feel like the only ways I can lose weight is if I learn to love myself at a bigger weight. If I love and feel confident about my body now, then, I should be able to rock the world when I get smaller. I'd talk to your doctor about how you are feeling.

    You can start with small things right now. Add an extra serving of veggies in your day. Stop drinking pop. Wear a pedometer and walk a (little) bit more. Wash the dishes by hand. You can do this!