but you have to start somewhere right?
I guess you can say I hit rock bottom about 5 weeks ago, although dh has said sorry it still hurts and my mind still wanders.
My best friend (call her S) came with us to our cabin (mind you I am not upset with S and S did nothing wrong, I have been best friends with her for 25 years) anyway, she is a year younger then me, but very skinny, long blond hair and yes she is a cutie.
Well after a fun weekend, we get home on Sunday and dh goes "I want to tell you something but you will probably get hurt or mad" well duh now I have to know, I say just say it he goes "I wish you would lose some weight" it was like a slap in the face, now yes I do need to lose some weight (we both do but I WOULD never tell dh that, I love him for him) but what stung more is he says is after a weekend that S is at the cabin. We did talk about it 3 or so weeks later and he doesn't expect me to get as skinny as S (another slap in the face) also the fact I found out he told her that his dad thinks she is hot and that she sent a picture to dh (this was for his co-worker C who we have been trying to hook her up with and it was just a normal photo she sent it to me asking if it was ok enough) and dh says to the effect "god dam you are so fiffin hot" (mind you he doesn't know I know he said this) it just really hurts and again this is not S fault and I trust her completely, I know for a fact she would never mess with anyone's hubs or bf etc, one I know tried and she told him off and told his wife, so yes I trust her.
It still just hurts and I am not sure how to get past it.
I have started back to the gym as my first step, I just go between being depressed then to pissed then back to depressed etc.
Thanks for letting me vent.